There were only five days left before 2018 is concluded. It was like this year just ran past you. You had so many difficult times you forgot about the good times you had. The tough times wearing you out and leaving you in the dark. You were an expert now at pretending that everything was alright. Like you weren't tired physically and mentally. Like the world you're in isn't dark and cold. Like you weren't silently screaming for help because of dark thoughts coming back and haunting you. There were so many things you could have done better and so many things that you shouldn't have done. But just like that 2018 is coming to an end. And as soon as the year starts you're counting down the days before your birthday. Everything is just passing by like that. You currently walk around the market in a thick jacket as the weather is getting colder. You always loved the winter because it's the season you were born in and also you would prefer the cold anytime over the heating summer. However, this year it feels a lot lonelier. 

    The times that were always being spent with friends in high school suddenly don't happen now. The moment you left high school and graduated you weren't only saying goodbye to the school but also to friends you thought that would always be with you. Now you all end up skimming through each others' posts on social media so awkwardly. The huge group of friends in high school becomes the two friends you still keep in touch with. It was weird, Ch