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Hyung, I am sorry but I cannot take it anymore. I need to fill my self esteem and of course, myself. I loved you so much to the point that I almost forgot to take care of myself.

I am sorry for being jealous even if you were never mine in the first place although you said you owned me.

I am sorry for looking like a 12 year old physically. I tried to become mature but I really look young for my age.

Sorry for being weirdo and random most of the time. I just want you to be happy and be able to smile despite the difficulties you are having in Med school.

Sorry if I spam you all the time or give you long sweet messages. It is the least I could do to make your dark days seem bright especially after your work.

Sorry for existing, for being such a sulking, whining, crybaby, poop and potato. I just have an altruistic heart for everybody and that includes you, who I really love.

Sorry for being Kairi.

I am sorry. Patawad. Gomen nasai. Mianhae. Por favor.

Hyung, I am letting you go. Please be happy. As much as I want to become friends with you, I cannot just become like that with someone I am deeply in love with. I will try to meet other guys, hook up, drink, smoke or whatever means of moving on from you, including this letter. Sorry also for how long it is. I figured out you have to suffer somehow after all the things I experienced loving you alone. This is nothing compared to that.

Now that you are free, go on. any girls you want, flirt with anyone and ignore my existence. Like what I said, I am just a pooptato for you. Nothing more, nothing less. You can also go back to your exes if you want to. I am out of the picture. I do not have a space in your heart. I never had one and I always have to beg for you to love me.

It ing took me days to write this goddamn letter because I was broken because of you and I lost my motivation in writing ever since my first boyfriend, fought with me, causing me trauma in writing. Plus I was sick as well. Feel free to throw away this one. This letter is not only for you but for me as well. You are better off without me.

One more thing. Do not worry about my birthday on the 26th of July. You said you were busy and that is just a simple day anyway.

Good luck with your thesis and career. I still wish you all the best but you. I might still be loving you but I guess I have to stay away from you for I might fall in love with no one to catch me. Be happy. I made this huge sacrifice for you to be happy.

From December 2016 to June 2017, thank you for the friendship. It was fun while it lasted. Thank you for everything. I am sorry for everything. you for everything. I love you and it ing hurts me. Goodbye forever. I will cut off all our connections. I left Red Room already so I would not be able to see you. And I might block you so that I can completely forget.

PS: I dyed my hair black because I got devastated. I dye my hair whenever I am feeling that way.

PPS: I cut it as well, for a change.

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