Soondeok’s diary

It hurts like hell. It always hurts so much on the second day, but this time it really really hurts. I can’t let Eun see me in such pain, he’ll make a fuss about it, I’ll have to spend my day away from him, I believe I’ll be better by night time. Eun’s still sleeping, I hate to leave him alone for the day, but I must. I’d better go before it gets too painful for me to walk. Hope Eun will understand, hope he won’t find out.

Eun’s diary

Soondeok did it again. She left me in the morning, I don’t even know where she went when I felt her side of the bed empty. A maid told me Soondeok went to her father’s place and she doesn’t want me to go so I guess I can’t go there to meet her. Come to think of it, maybe it’s a good thing – I don’t plan to meet her father that soon. The house feels so empty without her. Is something wrong? She would always tell me where she’s going and what she’s doing before she leaves me, even if it’s just a note, why’s today different? Is she feeling bad because of what happened last night? It really isn’t her fault, but perhaps she thinks it is.

Soondeok blames herself too much, too easily, what should I do to help her? And today, what should I do today? Absolutely no idea how to spend my days alone now, unlike before. Heck, I wish Soondeok’s here! Even the breakfast this morning seemed tasteless. She wasn’t there to feed me occasionally, she wasn’t there to laugh at my lame jokes, she wasn’t there to ask about the dream I had last night. I know! I’ll train today – she’d like that, wouldn’t she? Knowing how well I behave even when she’s not here. I better get my bows and arrows out.

--------------------------------- 

(Eun practising shooting, Taeyeon the maid comes with a bowl of water for him, Eun drinks it)

‘Ahhh~ Refreshing. Thanks, Taeyeon ah.’

‘You’re welcome, your highness. Oh dear! Your highness! Your fingers!’

‘Hm? My fingers?’

(Eun looks at his fingers, they’re bleeding from shooting too much)

‘Ahh…this? It’s nothing.’

‘Your highness, we need to call the doctor immediately!’

(Eun grabs her by the arm)

‘Ayy, forget it. It’s just a scratch.’

‘Oh, but your highness…it’s bleeding quite a bit. You sure it’s alright?’

‘I suppose simple treatment will do, it’s not as painful as it seems.’

‘Your highness, why are you out here at all today, it’s not like to you be in the sun…’

(Taeyeon looks at the shooting board)

‘Dear me! Your highness, did you shoot all those arrows there? No wonder why your fingers are bleeding! Oh why, your highness, why?’

(Eun smiles foolishly)

‘You’re right…why did I do it, Taeyeon ah? I suppose doing this makes me feel she’s with me.’

‘She? You mean…Lady Soondeok?’

(Eun chuckles)

‘My wife would’ve wanted me to practise. Shooting makes me think about her, like she’s right here with me. I hear her nagging ringing in my ears too sometimes.’

(Eun looks far away, deep in thought)

‘Do you…love your wife that much, your highness?’

‘Hm?’

(Eun turns to look at her, Taeyeon keeps her head down.)

‘I’m sorry…sorry, your highness. I shouldn’t have asked that, as a maid…my apologies, please forgive me.’

‘Ayyy, it’s alright, I’m glad I have someone to talk to today anyway, it’s boring without my wife…’

‘Your highness…you need to get your fingers treated.’

‘You help me.’

‘M-Me?’

‘I don’t want the entire household to know and fuss about it. You know how to, don’t you?’

‘Y-yes, I do…your highness. Please follow me…’

(They go to the med room, Taeyeon helps Eun wrap his wound up, Eun doesn’t take his eyes off of her when she’s working)

‘Taeyeon ah.’

‘Yes…your highness?’

‘How long have you been working here?’

‘I’ve been working here since I was 10, your highness. It…it’s been 17 years already…’

‘Already? Wa…it’s been a while, hasn’t it?’

‘Yes, your highness.’

(Eun sighs)

‘Taeyeon ah, I’m sorry.’

‘W-what?’

‘I said I was sorry.’

‘W-what for, your highness?’

‘Before I met Haesoo, I treated everyone badly have I not? Thinking I am the prince and all…’

‘Your highness…’

‘Yes, I was mean back then, a spoiled prince – and you, you got beaten because of me once, right?’

‘It’s in the past, your highness.’

‘Ahhh…that time I really was a trouble maker. I asked you to steal snacks for me from the kitchen, you got caught so they hit you, yet I did nothing about it though I was the one telling you to get them for me. I’m sorry about that.’

‘Your highness, it’s not your fault. Besides, even if you had come out to stop them, no one would’ve listened, no one cares about a maid as low as I, your highness. Here, all done now. Please keep the wound dry and try not to shoot for another week.’

‘I get it…Soondeok will be sad though…I was making progress…’

(Silence)

‘Taeyeon ah.’

‘Yes, your highness?’

‘Will you accompany me today? Just so I won’t be bored to death.’

‘I…how could I? Your highness, you should go to Lady Soondeok.’

‘She told me not to find her today, I respect that…we all need a day or two alone every year. Taeyeon ah, come to the park with me, will you?’

‘The…the park? No…No! I can’t…what if people…’

‘Well, if it makes you feel uncomfortable, you can carry stuff for me.’

‘Your highness, I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to do that, after all…’

(Eun leans close to stare at her)

‘Taeyeon ah, per chance, are you still…’

(Taeyeon holds her breath)

‘…mad at me?’

‘Oh no your highness, not at all!’

‘Good, then come with me, I’ll wait for you by the gate in half and hour – you prepare some food, light lunch will do, alright?’

‘Yes, your highness, just as you said.’

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(Eun returned in the afternoon, after he took a bath, he went to the kitchen to have some snack – but then he overheard 2 maids talking)

‘Yuri ah, what should we do? You really think she’ll be fine?’

‘I don’t know, Soyoung ah…she’s in so much pain now, she can’t even have lunch. Should we just send for a doctor?’

‘But she told us not to, and imagine if the prince finds out, what’ll happen! She ordered us strictly not to let him know…’

‘Still, we can’t let her be in pain like this!’

‘She knew this would happen, she chose to take the medicine, didn’t she?’

‘Aigoo, poor lady, if only her heart’s alright…then she wouldn’t have to take that medicine…’

‘When do you think the prince will get a second wife then?’

‘Shhh! Second wife? Soyoung ah, be careful of what you say!’

‘But it’s bound to happen! Soondeok can’t have any children, the bloodline can’t end like this-’

(Eun rushes up to them, worried)

‘Your highness!’

‘What did you two just say? Who didn’t want me to know? Who was in pain?’

‘Your…your highness…’

‘ANSWER ME!!! You! Yuri, answer me! Tell me everything!’

(Both maids fall face down on the floor)

‘Your highness, please forgive us…please spare us!’

‘Tell me everything!’

(One of them answers)

‘It’s…Lady Soondeok… today, she didn’t go to her father’s place…’

‘What?’

‘Lady Soondeok…she’s been staying at our dorm since this morning.’

‘Why? What’s my wife doing there?’

‘Your highness, her period cramps are getting worse and worse by the month…the doctor had said that…that…’

‘Said what?’

‘…’

‘SPEAK UP!’

‘Your highness…’

‘Speak up! Why won’t you tell me? Will you not blurt it all out unless I beat you?’

‘Lady…Lady Soondeok didn’t want you to see her in p-pain, so she hid in our dorm from you, your highness…and it’s because of the medicine she’s been taking every day.’

‘Medicine?’

‘Yes, your highness. The doctor had to double the dosage due to her heart condition, yet these are the side effects…’

‘Does that mean…my wife…my wife won’t be able to have any children, like what you’ve said?’

‘I’m afraid the doctor had said…it’ll…it’ll be hard…your highness…’

(Eun stumbles upon this shocking news, he leans on a pole for support, not knowing what to do. Finally, he speaks.)

‘Where is she now?’

‘Your highness, I suggest you not go there yet, she’s still in so much pain.’

‘More the reason I have to go! WHERE IS SHE?!’

‘Your highness…’

‘She’s my wife! If she’s in pain, I have to be beside her! Now tell me, where is she? Which dorm? Bring me to her before I have you both arrested!’

‘P-please follow me, your highness…’

(The maids lead him to the dorm, Eun stands outside the door, takes a deep breath then walks in. He doesn’t have to look for her – her sound gives a clear direction, he could hear her plain and clear – her groaning in agony, her crying in pain, it stabs his heart the moment he hears it. He walks over to her bed slowly, she’s facing the wall so she can’t see him, and even if she had been facing him, she wouldn’t be able to open her eyes and spot him. Soondeok hears someone coming so she tries to hold it all in.)

‘Who…who is it? Is that you, Sooyoung ah?’

(Silence, Eun can’t help but tears up. Soondeok sounded so weak.)

‘Yuri ah…is that you? Is it dinner time already? I’ll…I’ll skip the meal…’

(Soondeok turns and sees Eun standing there, looking at her)

‘Your…your highness…’

(Soondeok tries to get out of bed but collapses as she tries to stand up, Eun catches her. He breaks down in tears and embraces Soondeok as he sits on the bed, her hair)

‘You fool…you stupid girl…why did you hide? Why?’

‘Oppa…’

‘You must’ve been in so much pain…so lonely…and I wasn’t here for you. Oh my dear wife! Why didn’t you tell me?’

‘Oppa-’

‘Am I such a husband whom you won’t even tell me about this?’

‘No, Oppa…it’s just that…I didn’t want you to-’

(Soondeok groans, she tries to breathe slowly and deeply, Eun looks at her with worried eyes)

‘I…’

‘That’s it! Soondeok ah, you need to see the doctor, I’ll have him sent here right now, Yuri ah!!’

(Eun calls out to the maid)

‘No! Your highness…please…it’ll pass, I’m sure of it…just let me-’

‘Just let you stay here in pain? You crazy? I won’t let you! Look at you!’

(Soondeok holds on Eun tightly, looking into his eyes, begging)

‘Your highness…will you please…just…stay with me? I don’t need no doctor…will you lie next to me here?’

‘Deok ah, now is not the time for that…you need to get treated.’

‘Please…please…’

(Soondeok runs out of breath, Eun nods then helps her lie down first before getting in bed himself. He embraces Soondeok, hoping it will somehow alleviate her pain.)

‘Oppa…’

‘Hm? What is it?’

‘You’re very manly today.’

‘Me? What made you say that?’

‘I heard that…you have been shooting all morning…’

‘I’m improving, Deok ah. I’ll show you!’

‘B-but why did you have to do it…to an extent that…you…you hurt your fingers?’

‘Oh, this? It’s all your fault~’

‘Oppa…’

(Eun does aegyo, trying to make Soondeok feel better)

‘I missed you too much, Deok ah~~ This doesn’t hurt, it’s nothing compared with what you’re going through now. Aigoo, my dear wife, if only I can share half your pain…’

‘Oppa…thank you…for everything. Thank…thank you for…being such a nice husband to me…I won’t forget it…’

‘Soondeok ah, what are you talking about?’

‘Oppa…you have to stay strong and healthy…you have to know that I love you…’

‘Soondeok ah, cut it out, don’t say stuff like that. I told you, I hate it when you say that, it sounds like you’re dying…’

‘I don’t want to regret it, Oppa…if I don’t say it now, I’m afraid I won’t be able to say it later…’

(Eun wants to cry but he holds it in)

‘Nonsense. You’ll be alright, Deok ah, I’m here aren’t I?’

(Soondeok smiles)

‘Yes, heaven’s being good to me…I’ll be too pitiful if I go like this…alone…and in pain…I suppose that’s why they send you to me…before I go…’

‘Ya! I told you! Stop saying things like that!’

(Soondeok once again groans in pain)

‘S…Soondeok ah! You alright?’

‘I’ll live. Walking on the brink of death is my cup of tea…Oppa, my dear little dove.’

(Soondeok tries to joke around, hoping to make Eun feel better)

‘There’s one thing I regret though…if I go like this…Oppa…our 2^nd anniversary…’

‘Soondeok ah…’

‘I was looking forward to it…so much…’

‘Soondeok ah, it’s just 2 weeks away! You can make it!’

‘I want to make it…Oppa, I want to live…’

‘Who said you won’t? Listen to me, Soondeok ah, you need to see the doctor now.’

‘Nothing…nothing…there’s nothing he can do, Oppa…I’ve tried…’

‘Then, Soondeok ah, let me carry you back to our room. Let’s not stay here, hm?’

‘I…I feel sleepy, Oppa.’

‘I know, Soondeok ah, that’s why I’ll carry you back to our room, you can sleep there, alright?’

(Eun helps Soondeok sit up, then carries her back to their room.)

‘Here, Deok ah, all comfortable now?’

‘Oppa…you’re an angel, you know that?’

(Eun jokes around and turn his back towards Soondeok, wiggling his )

‘Why? Am I growing a pair of wings?’

(Soondeok laughs softly)

‘No…Oppa…guess what? The moment I got on your back, it seems like the pain has left me…’

(Eun kisses Soondeok on her forehead)

‘Sleep now, my dear wife – I’m here now, don’t you worry. I won’t leave you, I promise. Let me be your painkiller, alright?’

(Eun sings Soondeok to sleep – holding back the tears)

[Note from author: Sorry guys~ Been busy with EXO lately, maybe won't update as often ^.^]