Two hours later Sungjong opened his eyes with hands bound to a post.

                “You’re finally awake hyung, sorry I have to tie you up” Sungjae was sitting on a chair by the door. A small bonfire was cackling in flames between them. Empty boxes and cans of liquor were scattered on the floor. The wooden planks as walls showed the hard times it faced through the years; there were gaps and parts of the shack that had seen better days.

                “Sungjae, explain what the hell are you doing? Where are we?”” Sungjong gritted his teeth.

                “I used to come here with my dad when I was a kid before he died, we used to talk that someday I’m going to bring someone important here” Sungjae looked calm but his face were flushed and the liquor seemed to have already made its way to his head.

“What? Let me go why am I tied up?” Sungjong kept with the questions but the younger boy ignore him,

“You know hyung, I really admired ever since I met you. You think about others before yourself and you always helped others even if it’s already difficult for you, you’re always there when I thought everyone was gone. I always looked up to you” Sungjae did not stir on his seat and continues to stare at Sungjong with a serious blank expression on his face. “For you you’re the only person who couldn’t do anything wrong. I’ve always wanted you for myself Hyung”

                “What are you talking about? … ” Sungjong looked at Sungjae with utter disbelief. But the latter only smiled at him and continued on…

                “At first I thought my admiration was just simple, but I realized that I have fallen for you. Can you imagine?! Hahaha me?! I fell in love with a guy! *deep sigh Every day I struggled and hid my feelings inside thinking nothing will good will come out of it. Then suddenly you stopped hanging out with me and the others, then one day I woke with you and that bastard’s photo kissing by the park. Do you know how angry I was?” This time Sungjae’s face showed a pained and angry expression.

                Sungjong kept silent.

                “All this time I’ve been trying to get your attention but you suddenly went up and dated that guy. The only good in him is his looks! I kept repeating to myself if we only became roommates, then I would be the person who can make you smile like that. I was angry and before I knew it everything has happened.”

                “Sungjae! Clear your head will you? Nothing will come out with what you are doing right now. Sooner or later they will find out about this. Please, listen to me.”

“It’s your fault hyung…” Sungjae started to cry, “Every day you looked so happy being with him. When I thought you can date a guy there was a slight hope that I had thinking I may have a chance. But each time I tried to do something to tear you two apart nothing comes out of it. You two are always looking for each other, Heck! Even when I trashed your room it backfired on me and you two moved in together.” The younger boy was almost lashing while tears came running down his face, drunk.

“I thought you might get nervous and break up with him but I should’ve known that you two will just continue. I didn’t want to be like this. I was so afraid that I’m losing you and I panicked.” Tears were streaming down Sungjae’s cheeks as he explained. “Well I manage to make you two got into a fight, so I guess congratulations to me hahaha!”

                “Sungjae, please untie me and we’ll talk about this. Come on, everyone must be worried by now”

                “Talk? We’re already talking!! Since you started dating all you talk about is that bastard, he’s like this he’s like that. I kept asking Why? Why am I not the one next to you! I know, if it were me I could make you even happier”

                “Sungjae, if you like someone you confess to them not kidnap them! What the hell were you thinking? I know Myungsoo would never…”

                “Shut up! I don’t want to hear you saying his name ever again!”

                “Sun…” Sungjong couldn’t find the right words to say. His fears have now been replaced by concern for his friend.

                But the younger boy just wiped his tears and looked at him, “ Hyung, I always thought that I’ll be fine as long as you and my mom is here but then my mom is leaving again and I lost you too. There’s nothing left for me”

                “What are you talking about? You have us, your friends Woohyun-hyung, Chanyeol and Baekhyun.” Sungjong kept looking around for clues as to where they are but there’s only darkness outside the window.

                “When you told me I should follow my dreams and that I have a talent in theatre I followed you hoping it will get us closer. Why do you have to stay in the dormitory with him? If only I was your roommate then we would be the one dating now”

                “So the letters, the rose, and you even stalked me?” Sungjong was calm.

                “I didn’t want it at first, but the thought of how much I want you I’m willing to do anything. But as the day went by… dam* it” Sungjae paused now standing across Sungjong, the fire between them, “all I want is for you to look at me, the way you look at him. Why is it so hard? Aren’t you the one who told me to tell that person I like what I feels”

                “But I didn’t know it would be me! If I knew I…”

                “You will do what?!” Sungjae snapped, his anger fuming like the fire, “You shouldn’t have said anything like that! If you knew, what? You’ll reject me right? What do think I kept all quiet all this time?!” he was breathing heavily trying to control his tears.             

                Sungjong closed his eyes, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything like that. I’m really sorry”    

“Are you saying sorry because of what you said, or are you sorry you can never accept my confession?” Sungjae asked, fists clenched on both sides.

                “Both” Sungjong looked at his friend straight into his eyes, “I’m sorry about what I said and I’m sorry I can’t return your feelings. I’m so sorry.”

                “Why can’t it be us hyung? I will give you everything.” the young boy begged as if all the energy had left his body and he had to lean on the wall.

                “Sungjae, untie me. I promise I won’t run away.” Sungjong pleaded at his dongsaeng. “Untie me so I can help you. I won’t run away, please”

Sungjae hesitated but then reluctantly moved and came to his side. The red marks were already visible on Sungjong’s wrists as he rubs them. He did not make any move and calmly remained sitting.

                “Sungjae, listen to me. Don’t force anyone to love you. I know someday you’ll find someone who can return your feelings too” Sungjong finally spoke.

                “If he only didn’t exist, why does he have to be in this school?”

                Sungjong froze, “Sungjae, don’t do anything to him. He’s has nothing to do with this”

                “Nothing!? He’s the one who took you away from me! I should’ve gotten rid of him! He is the reason why we’re in this god*** mess!!

                “Sungjae! If you ever harm Myungsoo I will never forgive you!” Sungjong was surprised by the words that came out of his mouth. “I was the one who chose to be with him!”

                “What?”

               Sungjong wasn’t even thinking, he was desperate to get Myungsoo off the hook he’s willing to cover everything up. “Myungsoo liked someone else but I still stayed beside him.”

                “No, you’re lying! That’s not true!”

                “It’s true, you keep saying how a look at him and act differently towards him. He has someone he likes and I’m… I’m just someone he doesn’t need! He has nothing to do with this!”

                “Then love me instead! I will make you forget about him! Hyung, please! Leave him”

                 “I… I can’t. I’m so sorry”

The younger boy fell on his knees sobbing, “No! I don’t want anyone but hyung! I will work hard to be perfect, more than that guy so please.”

“Sungjae, I don’t need perfect. It’s not the reason why that I’m with him. I thought I own myself but nowadays I don’t even know me or the things I feel. It’s like my reason to smile has changed, and when I tried to figure out why. When I tried to find the end of the string he’s the one who’s holding it”

“What do you mean hyung?”

“I don’t know, haha I’m really an idiot you know. But I’m really sorry dongsaeng-ah I can’t answer to your feelings, even if Myungsoo and I aren’t together I don’t think my answer will change. I’ve always wanted a little brother and when I met you I was so happy I didn’t get the chance to know if you feel the same. Right now, that guy needs me and I can’t leave him until everything’s over.”

“Then if I can’t make you love me, I’ll make you hate me” Sungjae’s eyes turned basilisk as he forcefully pushed his hyung on the floor and tried to get to Sungjong’s clothes. The latter could feel the anger in Sungjae’s strength and the drug lingering in his system is still making him feel weak. But Sungjong didn’t gave up, with all his might he shouted at the top of his lungs,

“Stop it Sungjae! This is not you! The Sungjae I know will never do something like this!”

 By surprise his words seemed to have reached deep down into the younger boy’s mind and the boy froze in his tracks. He slowly looks down at his hyung and there was a complete and total look of horror on Sungjae’s face,

“My god, what have I done. No! No! No! I don’t want this!” the young boy backs off and stumbles on a container into a corner, trembling, “No I don’t want to hurt hyung.”

“Sungjae calm down, look at me” even though shocked Sungjong tried to help.

“No! Leave me please. Leave now! Run before I hurt you again! Don’t ever come back!” Sungjae shouted. Sungjong couldn’t think anymore as he run out of the run down shack. He doesn’t know how long he’s been running but when he stopped and looked back he can see a huge smoke bellowing up in the air.

..........................................................IDeviant.................................................................... 

Good morning, good morning! I want tofu miso for breakfast *sighs after cups of coffee, an apple, and two slices of fluff cake I am done with the updates! 

recently i tried writing on different places just to see how will the environment will affect me, surprisingly it has a good effect it helps me think things in new perspective... xD

What do you usually eat for breakfast guys? I'm just curious

it's only recently that I can eat breakfast regurlary again, ( you know not running out of the house with a piece of toast in your mouth or something lol)