Things I've Been Wanting to Say

Breakthrough
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Nayoung’s PoV:

 

Jieqiongie sighs in disappointment. That was a wrong move. I should’ve been forward with my answer. I always do this. “Are you happy,” she pauses, I know what her next words are going to be, but I’m feeling anxious “with us?”

 

I bite my lip.

 

To be honest, I just want to scream the words.

 

Of course.

 

Do you know how long it took for me to gain the courage to ask you out?

 

Granted it took Eunwoo to ask me if I liked you…

 

Granted it took Valentine’s Day to give me an excuse…

 

Do you know how my heart flutters every time you hug me? And that I wish we did that more often?

 

Do you know how many words I’ve written in the message box of the text message to you that have been left unsent?

 

Do you know that you’re honestly the reason why I’m failing my bio class because I think of you constantly?

 

Do you know how I was constantly battling myself not to date a girl in Korea?

 

Do you know how much I didn’t want to be attracted to you because I just need to focus on school?




 

I guess you don’t.

 

I guess you don’t know anything about these things.

 

But that’s kinda because I don’t tell you these things…

 

What the .

 

Im Nayoung, what are you doing.


 

“I’m sorry.” I blurt out.


 

I look straight at her and notice tears forming in her eyes. Did I say the wrong thing again? Damn, I don't deserve to date someone like Jieqiong.


 

Wait.

 

Nayoung, you ing pabo.


 

What you just said must’ve come off in the wrong way.

 

Your girlfriend just asked you if you were happy with our relationship and instead of saying “yes” like you wanted to, you come out with “sorry”.

 

What kind of makes that kind of mistake?

 

Oh, wait. Me.

 

Why do I always mess up in front of Jieqiong?

 

We've been dating for 5 months for crying out loud!

 

Wait. I have to do something or she's going to think I'm going to break up with her.


 

I step forward. She appears cautious, so maybe I should back off?


 

No. I need to stop hesitating.


 

I advance slowly. Her head dropping as I close in.

 

I pull her in for a hug and that’s when I hear a gasp and feel something wet hit my shoulders.

 

You really outdid yourself, Nayoung.

 

I can’t believe I just made her cry.

 

“Zhou Jieqiong,” I try my best to have a Chinese accent. I remember her trying to teach me the Chinese alphabet once. She also told me how much she liked it when I said her Chinese name. “You make me so happy.” I finally let it out.

 

“I don't know how to express myself,” I pause, desperately looking for words, “and I'm really sorry about that.” The fact that Jieqiong wasn't doing anything except crying lowered my self-confidence, but I needed to gather all my strength in order to make things right. “That's no excuse.” More words, Nayoung, for Jieqiong. “I'm going to try harder to prove myself to you.” My voice started shaking by the time I finished this sentence. I cursed myself for being such a coward.

 

I feel her arms on my lower back, pulling me in. The close contact made me warm and I was embarrassed by how my cheeks were burning, but I knew I had to be there for Jieqiong, it's the least I can do.

 

She doesn’t respond and it worries me, but I tell myself that she's still here. And while she's still here, I need to clean up the mess I've been carrying around.

 

“Jieqiong-ah,” I start again. I started finding words again. “I like you.” I could feel Jieqiong’s smile tickling my neck. “I like you. I like you. I like you.”

 

Jieqiong pulls away, startling me. She is genuinely smiling, her cheeks a little red. We lock eyes, but my eyes can’t help but waver around. “I like you,” I try to confidently say while looking into Jieqiong’s eyes. I just said it four times, but this time seemed the most difficult. “I like you… and it's scary, but I like you… a lot.”

 

A tear finally escaped my eye; I was so pent up with… emotion? Passion? I don’t know. I just wanted to make it right. Thankfully, Jieqiong wiped it away. Her hand stayed by my face and I felt the warmth of my face radiating to her cold hands. I

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Comments

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Agyusshi
#1
Gonna read this :D
EvanSamos
#2
Chapter 5: So cute
xxxReader
223 streak #3
Chapter 5: Why did I not read this earlier?! EEEEeeeeeEEEeeee!!! Hahahaha they're both so adorable. Finally Nayoung was able to show a part of her sweet side. Jieqiong would be so dead with diabetes if Nayoung would say and do all those things running through her mind lol. I need more napink!
kuetie #4
Chapter 5: AW THATS SO CUTE
Kchuang6 #5
Chapter 5: this was so cute!! i’m so glad nayoung was finally able to express her emotions, even in her own adorable awkward way. i’m looking forward to reading more chapters, thanks for writing!
pieceofpopcorn
#6
Chapter 5: There’s nothing wrong on this chapter, && it’s sooo cute! Lol minkyung tho-
pieceofpopcorn
#7
Chapter 6: I preferred A for the first question, I mean i’m dying to know where Kyulkyung will take this further and how nayoung will explain and fix things up. And further chapters would be more appreciated. & (ii) for following chapters. But (iii) is okay too :) take ur time, and of course it’s depends on you how you want to plot the story , I just make a suggestion for my own perspective request. Goodluck!
gudnight #8
o.O i can’t view the new update