O13. Where It'll Take Us

A Broken Doll

“You and Lu Han did what?!” Jia Li and Jia Yi shrieked.

“Shush!” Ke Xin put her index finger to her lips. But it was no use. People at the café were already glancing over their shoulders to stare at them. “If you guys say it like that, people will get the wrong idea!”

“But you guys like, …ya know.” Jia Yi made some awkward, circular motions with her hands, nearly knocking over her cup of tea. Ke Xin sighed and slapped a hand over her forehead. She and Lu Han held hands. Big whoop. Her friends were being so dramatic about this.

“Okay, okay. Details. Now!” Jia Li demanded.

“But, the date, I mean —”

“Ha!” Jia Yi, while laughing, pointed an accusing finger at Ke Xin, “You said date!”

Ke Xin rolled her eyes, “As I was saying, it was short. Lu Han had to get home earlier.” She was actually lying, hoping that this excuse would get her out of having to talk about what happened last week.  

“So?” The twins shrugged. They then leaned forward, not wanting to miss a single word as Ke Xin started describing everything that happened from last week’s date, er, outing with Lu Han.   

***

Ke Xin gave a tiny sigh. She had just glanced at her Cartier tank francaise watch and it was already ten minutes past seven. She never really complained whenever someone was late. She knew that something could have come up with Lu Han, causing him to be late. But Ke Xin just got a little crazy whenever things didn’t go according to schedule.

“Boo!”

Ke Xin jumped, a static-like jolt going through her startled body. She quickly spun around, her gray baker boy cap keeping her hair down.

With a huge grin and that messy, long hair that fell into his eyes, Lu Han was impossible to stay mad at. Ke Xin softened even more when she noticed that he was trying to catch his breath. His chest rose and fell, giving her a clue that he must have been running.

“You look pretty today.” Lu Han smiled, reaching out and tucking a piece of Ke Xin’s long hair behind her ear.

Ke Xin blushed slightly both at his touch and his compliment, readjusting her baker boy cap. She didn’t get too dolled up but she did put some effort into what she was wearing. On top she wore a simple, coral pink cardigan over a plain gray U-neck tee. Her outfit was completed with some slim jeans and coral pink ballet flats. Not too much effort, not too little effort.  

“Are you saying I look horrible all the other days?” Ke Xin pretended to be offended while Lu Han laughed heartedly. He looked quite adorable himself with a baseball henley and some light jeans.

“C’mon, this way.”

“Aren’t we going to Wangfujing?” Ke Xin asked as she walked alongside Lu Han.

He crinkled his nose. “Nope. That so-called night market is just a tourist trap.”

“Oh.” Ke Xin looked away, a bit embarrassed that even as a local residence of Beijing, she didn’t know that the famous night market was just a tourist attraction, not the real thing.

Lu Han just smiled and joked around with her like he normally did. Ke Xin smiled back at him gratefully for never putting her on the spot for things she didn’t quite know about. Why couldn’t more people be like him?

For a while, they just looked around at all the things they could eat. At first, Ke Xin was horrified at the amount of grease and pure fat just oozing out the street food but then she quickly shook that thought out of her head. She had to stop worrying and just have fun with Lu Han. Besides, she had two weeks to burn all the calories off before Madame Lu Hee would notice.

“Oh, yay! Omelets!” Lu Han perked up excited, grabbing Ke Xin by the hand. “Two please!” He told the lady flipping the golden crisps. She smiled and said that they’ll be ready in a moment.

“Hey, didn’t I say you can’t buy anything for me?”

“But it’s food…” Lu Han pouted so adorably that the heiress was just about to give in but she stood her ground firm.

“No,” shaking her head, “You’re not spending anything on me.”

Lu Han blew at his bangs, a corner of his mouth tugging up, “Fine . . .”

The vendor lady laughed. “You two must be a college couple, huh? I can tell.”

Lu Han and Ke Xin glanced at each other then awkwardly looked away. Ke Xin was about to protest and say that they weren’t but then she remembered that they were holding hands. How could you say that you guys weren’t as couple yet, you were holding hands? That’ll just be weird. So Ke Xin kept shut and smiled along with Lu Han.

The funny thing though is that he didn’t let go of her hand as they got their omelets. Nor did she shake Lu Han off.

***

“Okay,” Yi Xing interrupted Lu Han’s storytelling, “So you guys aren’t ‘a thing’ yet, but you and Ke Xin can hold hands?”

Lu Han shrugged, “I guess, we’re just…I don’t know…”

“Whatever lover boy, just continue on with the story.”

***

Lu Han bit into the golden brown skin of his omelet. It was still oven warm so he tried to keep his mouth open to blow out the steaming hot air and move the bitten off part of the omelet around in his mouth to prevent from burning his tongue.

He glanced over to Ke Xin who was attempting to cautiously bite her omelet. It looked funny to Lu Han because she was trying to eat street food orderly yet was trying to keep from burn herself too. She looked like she was struggling with some unknown object. Cute, cute.

She took a small bite and chewed once, then stopped. Suddenly, Ke Xin’s eyes widen in panic. The small portion of the omelet went flying onto the sidewalk as she quickly, as if her life depended on it, spitted it out. Ke Xin covered and looked at the rest of the omelet as if it contained rat poison.

“What’s wrong?” Lu Han worriedly asked. Ke Xin was always full of manners, so if she had spit something out, there was something extremely wrong.

“Does this have leek in it?” She coughed on the back of her wrist.

“I think so, why? Are you allergic?” Lu Han began to freak out. What if she had a severe allergic reaction to leek? Why hadn’t he asked her about what she could and couldn’t eat first?

“No, no,” She shook her free hand just as she dumped the omelet in a nearby trashcan, “It’s nothing like that. I just,  um…”

“What?”

“I really hate leek.” Ke Xin admitted with an abashed expression. Lu Han breathed out with relief. It was okay. She was okay.

***

“I can’t believe she did that!” Yi Xing marveled, finding it hard to keep in his laughter. “What happened after that?”  

“Well,” Lu Han shifted uncomfortably, “Ke Xin told me some personal things. But I don’t know if she would want me to share them with you.”

Surprisingly, Yi Xing nodded understandingly, “No prob, buddy, you two just have to hurry up and get together.” He gave Lu Han a pat on the shoulder, feeling his friend’s happiness rubbing off on him.

***

“Awww, you’re not going to tell us what happened afterwards?” Jia Yi pouted, trying to use her best puppy face to convince Ke Xin.

“Aiyah,” Jia Li flicked her sister’s forehead, “Stop being so nosy. Ke Xin, we respect Lu Han’s privacy.” Jia Li then nodded with certainty while her twin gave her an evil eye and massaged her forehead.

***

“You scared me for a second there.” Lu Han sighed with relief, his grip on her hand involuntarily tightening.

“Sorry. Actually, you aren’t the first one to get inconvenienced by my hate for leek. My mom had it bad.” Ke Xin admitted with a cute sheepish expression.

“Really? How so?” Lu Han never heard Ke Xin talk much about her mother. Neither has he ever seen her. It made him very curiously whether she was anything like Ke Xin.  

Their pace had slowed down to a light stroll, giving them a perfect opportunity for unrushed conversations. Still, Ke Xin seemed to fall silent upon the mention of her mother.

“When Mom was pregnant with me, leek was like the plague to her.” Ke Xin looked ahead, an unreadable smile on her lips. “If she tasted leek, smelt it, touched it, or even saw it, she’d vomit and vomit.”

“Wow…”

“Yeah,” Ke Xin shrugged, “She had my dad make sure to keep anything with leek out of her range. Mom only ate organic and protein filled things when she was pregnant with me.”

“No wonder you came out so pretty. You have to thank her.” Lu Han joked.

There was that unreadable smile again. “I really wish I could. I never got the chance to talk to her.”

Lu Han stopped walking. So did Ke Xin. He glanced at Ke Xin who was staring down at the window at her shoes. “I’m sorry…”

She shrugged, smiling that smile again. “It’s not your fault. I just wish I had some time to talk to her. Have some sort of female guidance in my life, you know? But I’m sure she’ll be disappointed in me if she was still alive today.”

“How?!” Lu Han couldn’t believe what this girl was saying, “You’re the perfect example of what a parent would want. Pretty, refined, smart, and you’ll be perfect at anything you pick up.”

Ke Xin sighed as they continued their stroll. “I think that’s the problem. Everyone praises me for doing many things exceptionally well. I see other kids get jealous when I get praised but I’m the one jealous of them.”

“You’re not making any sense, Ke Xin …”

“What do you think matters more? If you’re the best at something or if you love it more than anyone?”

Lu Han cocked his head to the side, giving some serious thought into what Ke Xin said. He then answered. “I guess if you love something a lot more.”

“Right.” Ke Xin maneuvered out of the way for a bunch of passing younger kids. Two of them pointed to Ke Xin and Lu Han’s joined hands and giggled coyly to themselves. “Why does it matter if I’m the best at something if I don’t have to try? I mean, I like learning, playing piano, and ballet, but… I just… I don’t have a dream. They do.”

Lu Han cocked his head to the side again. “So you’re saying that you don’t feel right because you don’t have a dream, a passion.”

“Yes! Exactly!” Ke Xin nodded ferociously. “So what if I’m good if I don’t have a passion in life?”

Lu Han pursued his lips. He never thought of it that way. Sometimes the virtuosos don’t even enjoy their music. Sometimes the artists don’t enjoy their art. Sometimes geniuses don’t like their doings either. But Ke Xin had to have some sort of goal. When he asked her about this, she tapped a finger to her chin and thought.

“I know people might think I’m just following orders, but I honestly do want to get into the family business and help my dad out.” She glanced up at Lu Han and when she saw that he was listening attentively, she continued. “It’s kind of weird why though. My parents were getting all this hate from everyone for marrying out of their class. They said that our company, which has been successful for generations and generations, would fail — just because my dad married an ordinary girl. I want to prove them wrong. I want to be my mom’s last triumphant.”

When Ke Xin stopped rambling, she looked up at Lu Han again to see if he thought it was stupid or something. He didn’t. He smiled widely, reaching out his arm to tuck the stray piece of hair behind her ear that managed to escape again.

***

Tons of junk food and a lot of walking later, Ke Xin finally plopped down on a swing in a nearby park. She watched Lu Han as he was getting ‘a surprise dessert’ by a tiny snack stand. She giggled to herself thinking of all that happened today. Ke Xin was surprised to find that she didn’t want to go home yet even though it was getting close to her curfew.

“Ta-dah!” Lu Han excitedly held out a styrofoam cup decorated with cute cartoon cupcakes and a plastic spoon out to her, “Cinnamon rice pudding!”

“Rice pudding?”

“Oh no, don’t tell me you hate you hate rice pudding too.”

“No, no, I was just thinking out loud to myself.” Ke Xin took the cup and spoon. Rice pudding was making her think of Se Hun. She remembered with a smile how adorable he looked when he was gobbling down her own homemade pudding. Ke Xin wondered if he was during okay. Just that cute, vulnerable face of his made it impossible for you to not want to protect him.

“Lu Han.”

“Yeah?”

“You never told me why you loved performing so much.” Ke Xin scooped a small bit of rice pudding into . There was too much cinnamon. Still, she ate it.

Lu Han plopped down on the swing next to Ke Xin with a sigh. He pursued his lips, thinking of his answer. Ke Xin noticed that he must have been thinking hard because his cute, concentrated face was back.

“Honestly,” He started to say, “I don’t know exactly how… Maybe at first it was sort of a tempting idea because it was rebellious? But I think eventually I grew to love the stage.”

“Why?”

He shrugged again. “There was a time when I was just singing out aloud a JJ Lin song to myself. I thought I was by myself but when I turned the corner some of my high school friends told me that I had a nice voice. They were clapping and whooping for me to sing another song. And I think that’s where it all started. I liked the praise of the crowd, the rush you get.”

Ke Xin nodded. She knew that feeling when you finish a performance and the crowd is on their feet. But she didn’t quite know the rush that Lu Han was talking about. She didn’t like performing all that much. But he must have really liked it because his voice got all dreamy when he spoke of it.

“Sing me something.” Ke Xin requested with a small smile.

“Huh?”

“Sing to me.” Ke Xin repeated herself.

“What do you want me to sing?” Lu Han nervously scratched the back of head while he put the stryofoam cup on the ground.

“Anything you want. I just want to hear your voice.” Ke Xin smiled, waiting for him to begin. Lu Han thought about it for a second then cleared his voice.

‘The rain has stopped, the sky has cleared, and we still don’t understand’ Lu Han’s voice was beautiful. Not perfect, but it was beautiful to Ke Xin. He couldn’t go too high but the sound of his voice was light and pretty.

‘What place this road of love could possibly take us’ He looked straight at Ke Xin, causing her heart to suddenly skip a beat.  Lu Han was singing about them.

‘Might it be to continue to cherish or it is to return to the beginning’ The last note lingering.

‘The current me’s liability is a bit weary’ With the last line of the verse, he reached out for Ke Xin’s hand. It wasn’t a normal hand holding either. Their palms were facing each other, their fingers interlocked.

Lu Han leaned in towards her as she closed her eyes. Her heart sounded like a motor, beating faster and faster. But he just lightly kissed her forehead. “Thank you for making this Spring Festival memorable, Ke Xin.”


 

 

(A|N)

Whew! I finally got this chapter out! There was a lot of writing and deleting with this chapter so I hope it came out right. Also, happy birthday to EXO's maknae, Se Hun. I threw in that rice pudding part just for him. ^_^

If anyone is curious as to which song Lu Han sang, it is JJ Lin's 'Bu Dong' or 'I Don't Know'. Lu Han sang it during the Sina Live Chat Show on Monday. He sounded so beautiful. ;__; You can hear him sing it here

I've been getting into Photoshop since last week and I made the little portrait thing of Ke Xin. ^__^ I think I can do pretty simple edits. Posters, eh. I know the techniques and stuff but I just don't have a lot of resources ;__; 

Is LuXin official yet? Stay tuned! 

 

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-aurora
[A Broken Doll] I should have the new chapter up by this week :)

Comments

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yifancakes #1
One of the most beautiful and heartbreaking, exo x oc fics i read in the earlier days with my old account. You have a wonderful writing style although the ending did throw me off at first, but it was practical and realistic. It made the fic memorable. :)

(January 27, 2012??? I feel old lmao)
NinjiPandi #2
I know this is kinda late but i just finished your story. I'm gonna be honest and say that I liked the ending. It was realistic and practical. Sure it wouldve been nice if Ke Xin and Luhan ended up together, but i mean hey, its not like first love is always going to be he last love. Anywhos, awesome job author! I'll definitly be looking foward to your future works.
alizarin #3
Chapter 11: OMG author-nim, you're the admin of FY-Exo tumblr and twitter??
_-Sumin #4
Chapter 20: The ending , no offense.
But the rest of the story was on point!
lululemon_lover24 #5
Chapter 20: I was disappointed with the ending...
I totally understand why you might want to stray away from the happy endings that readers typically love, but I just don't think this ending was the best fit for the story. I respect that it is your story and you have all rights to do whatever you want with it. I loved the first 18 chapters and am grateful that you wrote them, as they were such an intriguing and captivating read.
I feel like with this ending, there are still quite a few loose ends. But, as the chapter is titled, happy or sad endings depend on where you decide to end your story. I think I would've been happier with the ending if we were given more time to see Ke Xin without Luhan and with her current husband, so things wouldn't have felt so rushed. It felt to me that going into this story, it focused on this young girl, who seemed to lead this perfect life, and a boy, and the two of them opening up each other's worlds. The ending didn't really seem to conclude or address the focal point of the story. But those are just my thoughts. Anyways, thanks for the story.
PorcelainCreations
#6
Chapter 2: omg Cai's my last name. i can actually try to feel more for this story^o^
Perpetual #7
I really like your flow of writing and the way you made the entire story very realistic. I wasn't happy with the ending and I just felt really empty inside and the entire ending just made me feel very unsatisfied. I completely respect your ending though I guess I'm just a er for happy endings :') thanks for writing this and I'll be looking forward to your other stories in the future.
dawnxiamara #8
Chapter 20: I guess her father's prediction didnt come true that Luhan and Kexin would be them but with a happier ending. And as for me who really loves happy endings would have an alternative ending in which Luhan and Kexin found each other again after so many years and realize that their feelings are still strong for each other and with purple lilacs as the background, Luhan proposing to his girl ending it with the wedding of the century.... I am just romantic girl maybe who loves Luhan i suppose.....
AeroRyuu
#9
Chapter 20: I completely understand why you decided to end the story the way it did but it still seems off. The way this story began and flowed seemed like it would end either happily or contently but you just completely turned it on its head. It made me feel like I had been lied to or cheated on. I always learned not to lie to your readers so I guess that's why it's so strange to me. I'm not trying to sound mean or anything but this is my opinion on the ending.