“Can you lend me your math notes? Mines aren’t complete and… I didn’t attend school yesterday… I had to catch up with the exam…”

The person who asked the question wonders whether the seemingly cold guy even apprehend that he’s absent the previous day. “Sorry, there’s no way you’d lend me…” Siwon take the math book and give it to the person behind, which the latter acquires them dumbfounded. He then fixes the rest of his books from the desk and put it inside his bag, not forgetting to keep his blazers inside too. Not answering the person’s question doesn’t mean he’s avoiding everything. He just doesn’t want to get involved with the people that existed in the classroom.

The latter thanked and Siwon just answers the person with a short hum. Siwon immediately walks out of the classroom and as usual he’s being shot again by the diverse stares from the students. Whatever they want to say about him, he doesn’t care. His step reaches the front of the school’s main gate and he halts them to check the time on his watch. He wonders whether today he could meet Kyuhyun. Both are busy with their school schedule even after the finals. Because of that they couldn’t meet. Letting go of his gaze from the watch, he switch them to the sky and about to walk away. Before he done so, a figure he yearns to see caught his eyes, seated on the silver bench under the tree.

Kyuhyun wears a long sleeved plain orange sweater and white knee length pants. He looks different from the last time he saw Kyuhyun. His hair is shorter and neat, with bangs reaches the latter’s eyebrows. The tree shades from the sunlight illuminates Kyuhyun’s hair into a lighter brown. Perhaps Kyuhyun cut it because last time he told him that his hair is getting longer? Siwon ducks his head and huffs a smile, secretly glancing at Kyuhyun. He knows Kyuhyun can be adorable at times but he never knows that he could actually be this adorable. He notices that Kyuhyun did not glance anywhere except looking at the hard ground while kicking small stones. And why is he like that? Possibly because Kyuhyun did actually realize that he’s the center of attention now.

Siwon doesn’t like the way they stared at him. He then makes his move towards Kyuhyun.

“What are you doing here?”

Kyuhyun looks up to the voice and smiles. “You’re here. What took you so long?” So he waited for him, like what he did last month. Siwon couldn’t content his smile but even so he only lets out a half portion of it. If only Kyuhyun realizes that his captivating smile made Siwon in trouble, he was mesmerized by it. And why does by days Siwon is captivated by his smile?

“I’m out pretty early.” Siwon shortly checked his watch again. “When did you arrive?”

“I’m not sure.” Kyuhyun stands and shrugs, “About an hour ago?”

“You…” Siwon is about to scold Kyuhyun but changed his mind when the latter lets out a sorry smile. He starts walking ahead, “Don’t do that again.” He could wait for Kyuhyun longer, but he couldn’t just let Kyuhyun wait for him that long. On the other side Kyuhyun was quite in content and amused that Siwon was grumpy for a short moment because he waited for him. Kyuhyun trails Siwon and walk by his side. They are walking slowly in the mid of small crowds. Despite not knowing where they have to go and just walk wherever their soul brings them to, they don’t look like they were lost. Without their awareness, they are each other’s Polaris.

They feel complete with each other’s presence.

“How have you been?”

“It’s been a month huh? I’m having a short break now.” Kyuhyun said, “You?”

“I don’t think I’ll have my break. Even if there is, I won’t be surprised either.” Siwon said.

“My short break will be at home.” Kyuhyun chuckled, “Hyung is on full time working and he doesn’t have time for me. He’s been busy these days… I try learning how to cook but I can’t get the right taste...”

“You want to learn how to cook?” Siwon asked, “Your brother never taught you?”

“He did!” Kyuhyun said, “But I somehow cross the line of his patience. He got mad at me and dare me not to step into the kitchen otherwise he’d let me starve for days.”

“You must’ve messed the kitchen.” Siwon huffs a smile.

“Well, no. I didn’t mean to… Uhm I mean, yes I did but I didn’t mean to!” Kyuhyun pouts. “It wasn’t like a kitchen is ones home!”

“For your brother, seems like it. I’ll teach you…” Siwon offers. “How to cook.”

“You can cook?!” Kyuhyun surprised, “Wait, I think I remember. Jiwon once told me that you’re a good cook.”

“She did?” Siwon raised his eyebrows.

“Your little sister did!” Kyuhyun grins. Jiwon barely get along with someone she just knew but for she and Kyuhyun to get a long so well, it literally surprised him. They crossed the road side by side until Kyuhyun breaks the silence. “But, where are we going?”

“You still haven’t answered my first question yet.”

“I think I did…” Kyuhyun said stubbornly. “I said I’m on my short break didn’t I?”

“My school is really far from where you live… Why are you there? ”Siwon repeated his first question earlier before they left the place. The question made Kyuhyun drowned in silence but nevertheless he answers them.

“I…wanted to see you.” Kyuhyun said quietly. Siwon turns his face to Kyuhyun, couldn’t believe what he heard. Kyuhyun could only look down without having to know what face the other is making now, yet he didn’t realize he’s going to step on a seemingly broken part of the street they’re walking in. When Kyuhyun partially stumble, Siwon in reflex took a hold of his hand. It’s like one short moment which reminded them that some things we hold onto could eventually be separated from us. They stopped walking, right beside them is a bakery combined with café, a perfect spot to spend some time. Different hands but same warmth, they’re holding each other’s hand until they timidly let go of each other.

“It seems like we’re in the same path.”

“Shall…we go inside?” Kyuhyun tried to avoid Siwon’s statement, “I feel like having a cup of tea and cakes!”

“Let’s go.”

Both understand each other effortlessly. It took Kyuhyun not even a second to understand what Siwon meant. They have the same reason after all. That is, they wanted to see each other. Kyuhyun hides his smile as he walks inside the bakery with Siwon following behind, smiling secretly too. What could have made them like this? Just what struck them to have the so called funny-strange feelings for sometimes, weeks and months of barely seeing each other?

Their distant days are what made them yearn for each other.

When there are loads of works to catch up, unfortunately Ryeowook slipped his fingers making the papers he’s about to make copies of falls and scattered around the carpeted floor. He picked them up one by one, sighing in little irritation as he had to bend over again to collect them all. The office name tag wrapped loosely and hanged on his neck was on his way to see the small page numbers. He was planning to organize them neatly as he collected them so he won’t need to arrange them again. He sighs for the last time before swaying hard his name tag to his back.

When his hand is about to reach the last two overlapped paper, a hand reached them first. It doesn’t mean the small weight on his shoulder has been lifted off just like that. For the moment he was quite thankful that someone had the generosity to stop himself from bending over and over again like chickens trying to feed themselves. He might have looked stupid for doing that and since none of the employees had the nerve to help him collect the papers. Without looking at who picked the last two papers, he takes them and gives a short bow of thankful before turning around.

“Oh. If it isn’t you…” A familiar voice made Ryeowook stops and turns around. The person closes their distance and snatches his office name tag off from his neck. “Is it?”

“Give that back.” Ryeowook tries to snatch back the name tag but the other stepped back.

“Cho…Ryeo…Wook? Is that your name?” The other smirks as he stepped back even more with Ryeowook following him like a child trying to steal back a candy. “Trying to play as mysterious figure but I caught you red handed now! All these time you knew my name but I never know yours. You won’t tell me but anyway now that I know yours should I give this back to you or should I not?”

“You shouldn’t be doing this at working hour! Give me back my name tag!”

“I don’t care. Let’s have a talk. I have lots to ask you.”

“Didn’t you hear me? I don’t have time for your—“

“Why? Scared of getting fired? I could tell them right away to fire you. It wasn’t like you didn’t know my position or perhaps you’re trying to pretend you know nothing.” The other said and yet Ryeowook didn’t realize they already stepped into a director’s room. The tall figure closes and locks the door, keeping the key inside his pocket. Ryeowook took his chance to snatch his office name tag and wrapped it around his neck again.

“Choi Heechul-ssi” Ryeowook said firmly and Heechul takes his seat in one of the sofa.

“Cho Ryeowook-ssi. Take a seat and let’s talk.” Heechul said calmly and Ryeowook stands still. “Take your time to rest but business is all about give and take. I give something to you but I take back something too as a reward, fair enough?”

“What do you want?”

“Let’s talk.” Heechul raised his eyebrows, “Is that a hard thing to ask for? We have some unfinished business between us, right?”

Ryeowook took his eat oppositely from Heechul and place his papers on the table.

He never thought he would be caught off sooner than he expected.

Heechul is the oldest son of LT Food owner and there runs a high possibility when the son would roam around the office. He should’ve taken a note of that. Both didn’t end their staring contest. Heechul’ eyes seemed to speak that he wanted him to talk first. The man wants to know everything, such desire is written all over his face. “I don’t remember having any business with you. Instead, you are the one who has unfinished business with me.”

Heechul rest his back against the sofa, “Ah, father? I don’t remember your number so I can’t contact you. Even if I do there’s highly a zero percent chance that I would.” Ryeowook gets a hunch that Heechul probably throws away the note he gave him, perhaps the flowers on the vase too. “Knowing his condition, is it important to you? Why? Who are you to show up out of nowhere in front of me and my father? Who are you exactly to my father? I hate to say this, but I have lots of questions that my mind’s a mess. I can’t pick one properly. It’d be better if you explain everything to me without me having to waste my energy asking and speaking like this to you.”

“I saw it on the news. If he’s hale and hearty then that’s all I have to know. I’m just an acquaintance of your father, there’s no need to know me. Isn’t it enough that you know my name? And…if you detest wasting your time here you better unlock that door and let me out of this room.” Ryeowook sighs. “Or…Leave.”

“Excuse me? Are you kicking me out?” Heechul surprised, “I hate to use bloodlines but do you know who you’re talking to right now? I could ask them to kick you out anytime I want.” Ryeowook knows Heechul’s behavior would be like this. Temperamental but deep down he’s someone who cares for a father.

“I know so please do whatever you want.” Ryeowook said evenly. Heechul changed his expression and leaned forward, resting his arms on his legs and chins on his hands.

“You’re probably the same age as me. Father never introduces any of his acquaintance like you to me. I may hate business but I’m always on fathers back whenever he’s on business trips. I know all of his business associations and…You’re just an employee here. Father won’t make friends on a mere employee unless that person is someone important.” The last word got Ryeowook taken aback. He slightly widened his eyes and that didn’t missed by Heechul who’s satisfied with the reaction. “I’m right, you’re different. Who exactly are you?”

“…” Ryeowook then releases a soft smile which in return made Heechul taken aback by the calm reply. “You’re right. There’s no way your father got an acquaintance as young as me. But sorry to disappoint you, I only stated the fact that I try to believe. To tell you everything you wanted to know is not my place to do so. It’s your father’s. The reason why you asked me such question is because you don’t have the guts to ask your father.”

“Don’t have the guts?” Heechul scoffs, “What are you even—“

“There’s not only one person here you’re prying about, Heechul-ssi.” Ryeowook stands up and walk towards the door.

Heechul stands. “We’re not done yet.”

Ryeowook gets a spare key he kept in his pocket and unlocks the door. Something caught off his mind and he turns around. “I met your younger brother.”

Heechul may have not said anything but he wonders where and how the two of them could meet.

“Siwon…He’s a good kid.”

“Of course he is.”

“He’s been a good friend of my younger brother. They’re quite a friend…” Ryeowook confessed. “If you meet my brother in some other time, please take care and treat him well. We may have been talking like enemies. Perhaps you’re seeing me as one now. But I never wish for that. Our younger brothers got along quite well so…Let’s get along too.”

Friend? Younger brother? Siwon only have one friend and that leads to…Heechul repeats in his thought and turns around abruptly but to find the door closed in half. Despite what he just done to make the petite quite mad and disturb his work hour, Ryeowook did not slam the door. Perhaps that’s how his personality is like. He still got many questions left but strangely they’re bit by bit thrown aside when he knows Ryeowook turns out to be Kyuhyun’s brother. More realization came soon when he thought that Ryeowook’s surname does ring a bell.

Their younger brothers are good friends and without insight the older brothers crossed path too?

“Fate is such a clown.”

Kyuhyun and Siwon steal glances whenever they have their chance. Even a small bit of chance when the other looks away or take a sip of their drink or either take a bite of their food. After they admitted they yearn to see each other they hadn’t spoke a single thing. When both caught off and at the same time stared at each other they at once looked away. Siwon lets out a soft fake cough while Kyuhyun looked down on his half eaten blueberry cheesecake.

“Listen—“

They said altogether and paused. Siwon made a gesture for Kyuhyun to talk first while Kyuhyun made the same, thus making the two of them chuckling like children.

“Okay, enough with the silence contest!” Kyuhyun said.

“You can’t take it do you?” Siwon replied and sighs, “I guess neither did I.”

“I thought you could make it to the last.” Kyuhyun complained and murmurs. “Although we didn’t start it…”

“Who started first? We never made a deal for a contest.” Siwon stated, not forgetting the fact that they have a so called secretly silent glancing contest.

“Who say we did?” Kyuhyun argued. “Wake up.”

“You did.” Siwon argued back. “Wake up? You should be the one. I’m wide awake, thanks to this coffee.”

“When did I?” Kyuhyun asked again and raised a bit of his empty hot chocolate mug, “Chocolate never make me sleepy.”

“Enough with the silence contest!” Siwon tries to imitate Kyuhyun, resulting frown from the latter. “That’s what you said.”

“Yah…” Kyuhyun called, “I’m not like that!”

“Then try saying it again.” Siwon chuckled. “Perhaps you could mimic yourself better.”

“No. I’m wide awake, thanks to this coffee.” Kyuhyun mimicked Siwon back.

“Do I sound like that?” Siwon tilt his head, bemused. “I don’t think I sound like that…”

“Oh, here comes the talkative you.” Kyuhyun raised his eyebrows, amused. “It took me a while to get you here.”

“Cho Kyuhyun.” Siwon rests his arms on the table, “You really cut your hair…”

“Choi Siwon, you—” Kyuhyun called and about to start another argument but paused. Kyuhyun takes a spoon bite of the cheesecake and hurriedly gobble them until the small plate’s empty. Siwon tries to hold his laughter at the adorable sight. The latter had a small blueberry smudge on his lips and Siwon offers a tissue to wipe them off.

“Blueberry, on your lips.” Siwon said while Kyuhyun tries to wipe them off with the back of his hand but fail to trace them.

“I don’t think there’s…” Kyuhyun fades and Siwon leans forward to wipes them with the tissue. “Thanks….” Siwon put the tissue down and ruffles Kyuhyun’s hair.

“Since you’re here, I think I want to stop by somewhere today.” Siwon said, “It’s not that far, we can take a walk there.”

“Where?”

The blue sky descends and the orange sky arises. Kyuhyun trails behind Siwon as he enjoys the sky view. He had no idea where Siwon will bring him but he believes it’s a place that he’s fond of. Despite the day would end soon, it’s pretty strange that he could sense a fresh air coming. Siwon turns around and walk backwards, facing Kyuhyun who still looking up, admiring the bluish-orange sky. “Look to your left.” Kyuhyun turns to the left and freezes.

The waves are hitting each other tenderly, the orange light illuminates the once a blue sea. The sea is waving calmly just like how Kyuhyun felt. The two admires the breathtaking view as winds from the sea blows their orange illuminated hair. Siwon takes a glance at the seemingly deep-in-thoughts Kyuhyun. To bring the boy before the sunset to the beach was unplanned. However, if from the start he knew that Kyuhyun will visit him, he would’ve done the same. At that moment Kyuhyun looks different. It isn’t the look when Kyuhyun joke around and laugh out loud neither was the same when Kyuhyun share him some stories with thousand words. It’s that different look he hadn’t seen before ever since they befriend each other and without hearing anything from the boy, Siwon is aware that he’s now seeing another different side of Kyuhyun.

Siwon snaps Kyuhyun out of thoughts by signaling to follow him towards the sandy grounds. When Siwon firstly made a gesture to have a short walk at the seashore, Kyuhyun just stood there shifting his feet, kicking small bits of sands. Siwon smiles a bit and walks ahead. By the time he’s about to turn around, Kyuhyun is already walking by his side. Together they are walking side by side at the seashore, enjoying the evening breeze as they waits for the sun to descend.

“It’s been a while since I went here.” Siwon breaks the silence. “The sea, do you like it?”

Kyuhyun nods and breathes, “I’ve always wanted to pay the sea a visit again, but I’m glad now that I’m here.”

“When did the last time you visit one?” Siwon asked as he walks ahead. He didn’t get a reply from the latter, perhaps because Kyuhyun is too staggered from the sea view. He waits for Kyuhyun to start the talk again however when he turn his head to the side he sees no figure of the other. Eyebrows knitted, Siwon make his turn in place facing Kyuhyun who is expectedly standing still, looking down on the wet sand. They are not so far from each other which didn’t give Siwon a hard moment to observe the latter’s face. Kyuhyun seemed to be in deep thoughts again.

Siwon take his steps towards Kyuhyun and stops a few inch apart from him. Kyuhyun had the same look when he arrived in front of the sea. What’s only different is that he is trying to hide the frown on his face, trying so hard that his eyebrows are slightly trembling. Siwon tries calling but his voice seems inaudible for him. Before the big wave rushes to wash off their feet, Siwon pulled Kyuhyun to take a far step from the wet sand.

“Are you okay?”

Kyuhyun faintly nods and smiled at him. “Thanks for bringing me here today.” That is the kind of smile you’d find when you’re trying to hide something. That smile was forced and perhaps, what’s behind that smile is what Kyuhyun truly feels now. Did he somehow make a mistake bringing Kyuhyun here? Does this place reminded Kyuhyun of something? His eyes searched Kyuhyun’s but this time it is hard to decipher them.

“Siwon…Let’s end the day and go back home.”

Ryeowook yawns that he dropped the key house to the small carpet that he’s standing now in front of the door. Bending down as he snatches the key, he unlocks the front house’s door and makes himself comfortable inside the cozy shelter. The living room was dark but there’s small illumination of light came from the kitchen. Curious, he placed his bag on the living room’s couch before walking towards where the light came from. Slowly he came to recognize his brother’s figure standing in front of the fridge, looking at their picture when they were young. “Kyuhyun ah?”

“Hyung.” Kyuhyun said, without turning around. “You’re home. Welcome back.”

“What are you doing here?” Ryeowook asked. Kyuhyun turned around and looked down. “Do you perhaps remember—“ Ryeowook was mutely taken aback by Kyuhyun’s face. Eyes almost red and lips trembling as if they’re in cold, traces of tears from the young’s cheek are still visible. “What happened? Did you fight again?!”

“No hyung… I can’t…” Ryeowook could see tears striking down as his young brother sobbed quietly. Kyuhyun slowly close their distance and place his head on his brother’s shoulder. “I’m scared hyung…Help me.” Frowning, Ryeowook pat his younger brother’s back despite not knowing what was wrong. But that didn’t calm the latter. It made Kyuhyun to hold his cry, resulting a silent whine. “I can’t picture it in me…”

“What can’t you picture, Kyu?”

“I… I can’t remember…” Kyuhyun said between his sobs. His shoulders are trembling, trying to hold his tears from falling and fists rested on his brother’s chest. “I can’t remember mom’s face and voice…”

“So that was it…” Ryeowook soothes.”Sometimes, it happens to me too Kyu. Don’t worry. Even though mother is not here with us, even though you may not remember her clearly…Mother will always be in our heart…”

“B-but hyung I—“ Kyuhyun’s breath hitches.

“Do you miss mother?”

“Yes…”

Ryeowook then sighs and caresses his younger brother’s back like a brother should.

“I miss mother too, Kyu.”