There was still a rest of daylight in the sky despite how late it already was, and the heat of the long summer day finally let up to give way to the slightly cooler night air as Hakyeon got out of his car and walked up the wide path through the neatly tended garden, climbed up two steps and pulled out a set of keys to unlock the front door of the house he hadn’t unlocked in far too long. And yes, four days was far too long!

He tried to be as quiet as possible, but no matter how quiet he was, he would always be greeted by the two dogs of the house; the smaller one would jump up on his legs, vying for his attention, while the big, hairy gentle monster that was his companion ran in circles around them, narrowly missing furniture and decorations until Hakyeon had greeted both of them to their satisfaction and they calmed down, returning lazily to whatever they’d been doing before.

Apparently, his precaution to be quiet had been in vain, as the ones he hadn’t wanted to disturb came running down the stairs anyway, and he suddenly found his arms full of children.

“Appa!”

“Appa!”

“You’re home!”

Hakyeon laughed as he picked up his second youngest, making sure the little boy got as much attention as his two older siblings as he greeted them.

“Aigoo, what are you rascals still doing awake at this hour?” He laughed, not a hint of a reprimand in his voice as he kissed his oldest daughter on top of her head.

“We were watching your show! Appa said we could…”

“You looked funny with the green tie! It looked as if you had a leaf around your neck, like that monkey from the cartoon!”

Hakyeon laughed at the comparison his oldest son made, and had to agree with him silently.

“Uncle Jaehwan called! He promised to take us to one of Uncle Wonshik’s concerts one day!”

Hakyeon frowned at his daughter’s words while he tried to avoid the sticky hand the toddler in his arms was trying to press against his face.

“He did? Well, he can do that, but not before you are at least 25!”

Both the girl and her little brother pouted.

“Why not?”

Hakyeon sighed, giving up on avoiding his son’s sticky hand and merely closing his eye to avoid worse damage.

“Your uncle Wonshik has a very dirty mouth when he’s on stage…”

The girl laughed, incredulous.

“Uncle Wonshik?! I don’t believe you!”

Hakyeon chuckled quietly. There went the fierce rapper’s reputation!

“Oh, trust me, he does! Now, where is your appa? Did you tie him to a tree again?”

The three of them shook their heads.

“He’s sleeping on the couch.”

“He fell asleep in the middle of your show!!” His son added loudly, as if denouncing an unforgivable crime.

Hakyeon laughed while his heart jumped in his chest, ruffling the boy’s hair.

“He must be exhausted if he didn’t stay awake until the end. And you should go get ready for bed now, too. It’s late and you’ll be as exhausted as your appa tomorrow if you don’t sleep soon!”

They pouted, but did as he told them, climbing back up the stairs to their rooms while Hakyeon made his way to the living room to find his husband.

He found Taekwoon on the couch, just as their oldest had told him, one arm wrapped protectively around their youngest daughter and with their old black and white cat sleeping curled up behind his knees. Hakyeon’s heart warmed at the adorable sight, but at the same time a pang of guilt ate at his conscience. He left him alone at home far too often, with so much to do on his own… No wonder he was so tired and fell asleep on the couch.

Careful not to wake him, he tried to pick up their baby daughter and bring her to bed, but upon feeling the baby’s shifting Taekwoon’s grip on her tightened before he woke up. He blinked confusedly for a second, but upon recognizing Hakyeon he relaxed, relinquishing the baby to her other father.

Hakyeon picked the small sleeping bundle up, cradling her in his arms as he bent down and placed an almost chaste kiss on his husband’s lips.

The little baby didn’t wake up as he carried her upstairs, not even when her brothers started fighting and the younger of them let out a dissatisfied wail that could have woken up the dead. Hakyeon put her down gently in the nursery, rushing to the room over to make sure his sons didn’t behead each other.

“He started!”

“It’s my Nino!”

Hakyeon sighed, picking up the purple rhinoceros plushie that had fallen to the ground during their fight and returning it to its owner.

“You have your own plushies, don’t take your brother’s. And you, you can talk, there is no need to hit your brother. Now apologize, both of you, and wish each other a good night.”

The boys pouted, but ended up doing as their father told them, hugging each other good night before the older left for his own room, cradling his plushie. Before Hakyeon could take even so much as a relieved breath, the pained cry from his daughter startled him.

“Appaaaa!”

Once more, he rushed to the next room, finding the oldest struggling in front of the mirror.

“Appa, my hair-tie got stuck…!” She whined, pulling at the tangled mess on top of her head without success.

“Aigoo, come here…” Hakyeon soothed, ushering her to sit down on her bed in front of him while he carefully untangled her hair from the evil tie until it was free. Noting the silence in the other rooms on the top floor, he offered to brush her hair for her, and by the time it was all straight and silky once more, the young girl was almost asleep. She cuddled against her father’s shoulder when he lowered the brush in a sign he was done and wrapped her small arms around his waist.

“I’m glad you’re back home… It doesn’t feel right when it’s not the six of us together…”

Hakyeon cuddled her back, sure he’d heard that exact same sentence before somewhere.

“I’m glad I’m home, too. I missed you.”

She fell asleep in his arms, and he laid her down gently, tucking her in before wishing her a good night without waking her up.

“Appaaaa~!” The older of the boys called him impatiently as he was just about to close the door to his daughter’s room.

“What is it?” He skipped into his room, making sure not to step on any of the strewn about toys. He would have the little rascal clean that up tomorrow, but not right now.

“I don’t want to sleep just yet! We didn’t get to spend enough time all together since you came back…”

Hakyeon sighed, booping the small boy’s nose and pulling his blanket up higher.

“We’ll get to spend lots of time together in the next couple of weeks, and you’ll already be tired of me by tomorrow around lunchtime, longing for the good old times when I was gone, and only your fun appa was here.”

The boy pouted.

“That’s not true. You’re really not that bad to have around, appa.”

Hakyeon chuckled, a distant feeling of dejá vu niggling on his mind as he tickled the boy.

“Thank you so much. You are not the worst of the bunch, either.”

The boy giggled, but pouted when Hakyeon made to leave the room.

“You can stay awake until your appa comes to wish you a good night, too, but then you sleep, ok?”

The boy wasn’t satisfied, but he nodded eventually, and Hakyeon wished him good night and left the room.

In the hallway, he came across Taekwoon, who was just coming out of the nursery, holding a small plastic bag whose contents Hakyeon didn’t want to explore further.

“She didn’t even wake up as I changed her nappie… I’m so glad that we have at least one heavy sleeper…” Taekwoon chuckled, and Hakyeon could only agree. It had taken the baby less than two weeks to get used to the new environment and since then she slept through the nights, only rarely waking them up in the middle of the night.

He only peeked into the nursery quickly, brushing a kiss against her forehead before leaving her to sleep.

His youngest son wasn’t as easy to send to sleep, though. Instead of changing into his pyjamas, like he’d been told to, he was sat in the corner playing with Lego’s.

“Young man, weren’t you supposed to get ready for bed?”

The boy shook his head.

“The seals don’t have a house yet!” Demonstratively, he lifted one of the Lego seals for him to see.

“Hmm… Can’t they sleep over with the penguins, just for one night?”

The boy shook his head.

“They eat the penguins!”

Hakyeon hadn’t thought about that important detail.

“What about over there?” He pointed out an apparently empty part of the Zoo the boy had been building.

The boy frowned, shaking his head again.

“No! Polar bear sleeps there. He eats seals!” He explained to his father as if he doubted his intelligence.

Hakyeon sighed. He needed to discuss the amount of time the boy was allowed to watch the Discovery Channel with Taekwoon.

“Ok, let’s finish the house for the seals then. But then it’s bed-time!”

The boy shook his head once more.

“The zebras!”

“The zebras will sleep with the giraffes. They won’t eat each other. And the parrots can sleep in the zookeeper’s house. You can build their houses tomorrow!”

The boy pouted, but let Hakyeon help him finish the seal’s house and put them to bed.

“Now come on, bed-time. You’ve worked hard today!”

The boy still pouted.

“You haven’t seen if I worked hard, how can you know?”

“I know because you always work hard, whether I’m here to see it or not.”

He helped the little boy change into his pyjamas and tucked him into bed. By then, his tiredness was showing clearly.

“I wish you were here to see…” The boy yawned, and again the pang of guilt he’d felt when he’d seen his exhausted husband sleeping on the couch returned.

“I’m going to be here a lot now to see how much you work.”

He brushed the hair out of his forehead and placed a tender kiss there, wishing him a good night just as Taekwoon came into the room as well, repeating the gesture. By the time they were leaving the room, the boy was sleeping already.

Taekwoon wrapped his arm around Hakyeon’s waist, and the older leaned against him as they stood and watched their child sleep for a moment. Their child, a part of their family… It still sounded so unbelievable, even after all these years…

They closed the door softly behind them and returned downstairs to the living room.

Hakyeon surveyed the mess of half eaten popcorn bowls, juice cartons and a tipped over glass that thankfully didn’t seem to have been too full anymore as it had fallen over between strewn about toys.

“Sorry, I didn’t get to clean up yet…” Taekwoon apologized with a sigh, but Hakyeon shook his head, kissing him gently.

“No, that’s ok. I’m going to clean it… I’m sorry for being gone for so long and leaving you alone with so much work.”

Taekwoon shook his head in turn.

“We’ve been through this before, Hakyeon. You had work to do, I didn’t. And when I happen to need to leave for work, you’ll be the one who stays home with all this mess.”

“I leave so often for work, though…”

“And you always come back afterwards and we go back to helping each other. It’s ok…”

Hakyeon stepped close to Taekwoon and hugged him tightly, a hug that was soon reciprocated.

“I’m so glad to have you…”

Taekwoon smiled over his shoulder.

“How about you clean up just the worst real quick and I get us some hot chocolate and cookies?”

Hakyeon leaned back in Taekwoon’s arms, looking up at him incredulous.

“How are there still any cookies left?”

Taekwoon smirked.

“Same spot as always: between the food that needs working on…”

Hakyeon laughed, stepping out of his arms.

“Well then!”

It didn’t take as long as he suspected to return the living room to a state that didn’t resemble a war-zone, and soon they were cuddled up against each other on the couch, fitting against each other in a way that hadn’t really changed over the many years they had known and cuddled with each other. The hot chocolate still tasted the same, and the cookies didn’t last longer than usual, either. Not many words were spoken, but then again, they had never needed too many words to let the other know what they were thinking

*#*#*#*

The sun was high on the sky as they sat in the garden behind Hakyeon and Taekwoon’s house, watching their children play with Wonshik’s nieces and Sanghyuk’s nephew. The cake was already gone for the most part and there wasn’t a trace left of the ice-cream, but neither of the six felt like getting up and out of the shade to get more for the time being.

Their conversations had died down a bit, but it wasn’t for a lack of topics, and more because they did enjoy just spending time together, not necessarily talking all the time when they gathered.

“Yah, Jaehwan-ah! By the way…!” Hakyeon broke the momentary silence after a while. “I don’t agree with you taking the kids to one of Wonshik’s concerts just yet. Eight and six is a bit young, don’t you think?”

“Ah, don’t worry, hyung…” Wonshik chimed in. “There won’t be any concerts any time soon, anyway. I’ve been trying to work on the next album, but… I’m not really making progress. It’s not that I’m out of ideas, it’s just… everything I write doesn’t fit me alone. It’s as if I can only write songs that would only fit us six together right now. I’ve tried to adapt them to make them fit some of the idol groups that are out there, but it won’t work. They’d only work with all of us… It’s like a curse.” He let himself slump forward, sprawling half over the table in front of him, and Taekwoon barely had the time to save the rest of the cake before Wonshik’s elbow landed in it.

“You all don’t happen to want to come back on stage with me?” He chuckled, and it wasn’t entirely jokingly.

“Half of us are already over fourty, Wonshik…” Hakyeon remarked worriedly.

“I’m sure you still have it in you, hyung. I bet you’d still dance as smoothly as in your twenties.” Wonshik batted his eyelashes at him in a failed attempt to do aegyo. “And it’s not like we still have to throw each other around on stage…”

“But that’s half the fun!” Hongbin protested, in the middle of feeding one of the dogs his ice-cream waffle, just to be knocked in the head with a teaspoon by Taekwoon for it.

“Right, if you still got it, then go ahead. I’m not going to risk my bones like that again.”

“Hyung, have you even watched any of the dramas I’ve been in lately? I’ll have you know, I don’t have a stunt double! But fine, if you’ve all become too weak to lift me…”

The good-natured bickering continued for a bit, eventually dying down.

“Just imagine if we were to actually make a comeback, though… What would we even use as concept that we haven’t done yet?” Hakyeon mused.

Sanghyuk chuckled at the other end of the table, feeling safe as he sat far enough away from Hakyeon to be out of his immediate reach.

“How about housewives?”

Hakyeon narrowed his eyes at him, just to smile sweetly at Jaehwan a second later.

“Jaehwanie, would you do me the honours?”

Jaehwan grinned, reaching out at an impressive speed and chopping the maknae’s neck.

“Thank you ever so much!” Hakyeon thanked him, satisfied, as the youngest rubbed his neck where Jaehwan had hit him.

“You know… I actually wouldn’t mind returning to the stage. I miss it more than I thought I would. But I don’t have anything close to publishable at the moment…” Taekwoon spoke up suddenly, trailing off as he shrugged his shoulders.

Half of them looked at him with surprise, but Jaehwan nodded solemnly.

“I may keep standing on stage, but whenever one production ends, it’s like… I keep thinking: ‘Ok, great, this was fun, now back to what really matters…’, and then I remember that no, this is it, I’m not going back to something else, and to be honest, it isn’t the greatest of feelings…”

“I get what you mean… Dramas are all fun and everything, but it’s not like I get to sing in them very often. And even when I do, it’s not the same. And I did start all this, became a trainee and everything, to be a singer, not an actor…” Hongbin admitted, playing with the remaining crumbs of cake on his plate.

“It would be fun to show the little ones that their old teacher isn’t just all talk but can actually dance when it counts. And to be honest, a practice room in front of a couple of still wet-behind-the-ears kids is not it!”

Hakyeon lifted his eyebrow at the maknae referring as himself as old, but a smile grew on his face.

“You know, we never really officially disbanded…”

*#*#*#*

Roughly 6 months later

It took a while to get each and everyone’s current jobs sorted out and organized everything between them, but eventually, the big day had come.

Despite the countless times they’d been there, the hundreds of times they’d gone through the motions, the uncounted times they’d been on stage… The nervousness was there, reflected on each of their faces, in their slightly shaking hands, the shifting feet, as they gathered around in a circle, in the same order as always, and put their hands together to form the star.

Hakyeon started the greeting, and they finished it together, in the way that had become such a part of their being, their souls, that they could do it in their sleep.

Jaehwan wiped the sweat off his brow as he took his position on the small platform that would raise them on stage.

“You know, I think I haven’t been this nervous since our debut…”

Five heads nodded as they agreed with him, going through the last motions to calm themselves and focus on their stage.

“I wonder…” Sanghyuk swallowed before he continued. “I wonder if there will be any Starlights in the crowd…”

Hakyeon couldn’t keep back a smile, placing a hand on the maknae’s shoulder and squeezing comfortingly.

“Oh Hyukie... You know, I learned a long time ago that Starlights might not always be visible, but when their time comes, they’ll shine the brightest.”

Slowly, one by one, the smiles on their faces matched Hakyeon’s, and the platform began to rise. Ten years evaporated in the space of a few seconds as an ocean of blue and gold appeared before their eyes, and fanchants the likes of which the old building had never heard before erupted.