Jungkook can't really believe he's going through with this hair brained scheme. While somewhat hilarious the night before, now that Jungkook's faced with the prospect of fake dating his friend... well, it just feels ing awkward.

Jungkook glances Taehyung from the corner of his eye. Taehyung is doing some kind of weird ritual involving the mirror, a bottle of toothpaste, and far too many awkward dance moves for o'clock in the morning, that he generously ignores. "So," Jungkook garbles around his toothbrush, white foam dribbling down his chin. "There's gotta be some ground rules, right?"

Taehyung pauses his... performance to eye him up and down. "What?"

"You know, the uh, plan." He doesn't want to have to spell it all out, but Taehyung's sending him a blank stare. "With the whole faking us being together and all that stuff. You know."

Taehyung snaps his fingers. "Oh, operation zero-two-four-seven-three."

Jungkook blinks. "...Sure. Anyway, I was thinking that we should probably have some ground rules or something."

"We need a safe word," Taehyung declares, and when Jungkook hesitantly answers that it wasn't quite what he was trying to imply but he guesses that it could work, Taehyung blurts out. "Mine's Papa Smurf."

Jungkook doesn't even try to comment on this and moves on, spitting out his toothpaste. "I was thinking more like guidelines." He's trying really hard to pretend to himself that he's not getting a kick out of the whole thing, but the more he speaks, the more he realises he's failing. In any case, Jungkook had his own agenda for agreeing, knowing he could possibly profit from this whole escapade. "I'm not kissing you."

"Damn, my whole plan is ruined." When he sends him a mildly horrified look Taehyung pats his shoulder comfortingly. "We could still hold hands, right? Like when we're all chilling in the waiting room, I could sidle up to you and get all up in your business."

Jungkook's a bit wary of what exactly Taehyung had in mind in the first place. "… Holding hands is fine."

"Excessively long hugs are good, too."

"We could use pet names."

Taehyung looks at Jungkook like he's just discovered the universe. "Why didn't I think of that? You're so smart!"

Jungkook feels an evil rising within his chest that he can't squash. Not that he wants to. "You'll be honey bear."

Taehyung whips around and jabs the roll of toothpaste at Jungkook threateningly. "I told you that in confidence!"

"All the more reason to use it, seeing as it's something only you and I know," he argues, "and your mother, I guess."

Jungkook can see him wrestling with the logic in his head. His expression goes from angry, to thoughtful, to disgruntled, back to angry, then to acceptance. "Okay, but only when we're pretending to be alone but know someone else is watching. I refuse to let you call me that on a daily basis. It was bad enough hearing it from my mother until I turned sixteen and put my foot down."

Jungkook can't quite believe how much fun he's having right now. He breifly wonders if it's morally wrong to pretend to date your bandmate just to get a rise out of the members for a giggle but quickly dismisses the thought. "Okay, fair. I mean, in general we're going to have to be cuddly and awkwardly close when it seems like we're alone, but know someone's watching. And if they get closer we can spring away and get all on the defensive."

Taehyung looks at Jungkook with shining eyes. "I knew there was a reason I chose you for this."

They high five and leave the bathroom with equally sinister smirks.

It's been a week since their talk and Jungkook's feeling... well, not anxious, but definitely on the edge of restless. Since then neither of them had made a move, except for maybe that one time that Taehyung declared his undying love for him in the waiting room (but it wasn't as if Taehyung didn't do that on a regular basis anyway).

Jungkook knows that the more time Taehyung has to ruminate, the worse the outcome will be. One day he might wake up from a nap to find the older kneeling on the floor with a ring in his hand. He shudders at the thought.

So, it's only natural that Jungkook brings it up. All seven of them are watching the airing of some ty talk show they guested on, which no-one's really paying attention to, while Jimin ditches popcorn kernels at a highly annoyed Yoongi. Jungkook has half a mind to tell him to stop before Yoongi really loses it, but it's also kind of funny so he lets it continue. It's not like he's the one who's gonna get hit, so.

Taehyung's sitting with his head in Jungkook's lap so he can feel when Taehyung rolls his head to look at him.

"What?"

"You're staring," Taehyung points out and, oh yeah, he kind of is staring now that he thinks about it.

His cheeks heat up but he tries to stay Cool and Collected. "No I'm not. I'm just thinking."

Taehyung wiggles his eyebrows and shuffles higher onto his lap. "Uh-huh. About me?"

Jungkook tries his best to shoot him a withering look but it's kind of dampened by the fact that Taehyung is totally right. He pokes him in the forehead to make himself feel better. "No. Well, I mean, yes but only because of our uh..." He trails off and glances around the room to check if anyone's listening. They're not—especially not Yoongi who looks like he's two seconds away from smacking Jimin into the ground. "Operation."

"Oh, what about it?"

"When are we going to y'know, kick it off?"

"Now. Right now," says Taehyung after scanning the room.

"Wha--"

"Cuddle me," he demands, sitting up and nosing at Jungkook's shoulder. He lifts his arm out automatically and Taehyung slips under. Just to top it off, Taehyung puts his head on Jungkook's shoulder, his hair tickling at his neck. Then he places a hand on his thigh, God, okay. Jungkook has totally got this. He is one-hundred percent under control and not about to have a fit.

Hoseok notices them nuzzling at each other and gags dramatically at the show of affection. "I'm going to be sick. Get a ing room you two."

Taehyung very maturely sticks his tongue out in retaliation and sniggers, cuddling even closer.

Jungkook leans close to Taehyung's ear and whispers, "what happened to making it subtle?"

Taehyung shrugs and reaches around to clasp the back of Jungkook's neck, whispering in his ear in turn. "Whatever, we cuddle all the time anyway."

Jungkook guesses this is true, but while the whole hand on the thigh and back of the neck and whispering into each other's ears, it feels strangely intimate. Too intimate.

But, then, intimacy is what they're going for.

So Jungkook guides his fingers up to tangle in Taehyung's hair, pushing him back down against his shoulder. When he gives a particularly good scratch at the hairline of his neck, Taehyung arches his back and moans in appreciation.

Jungkook feels kind of strange about it.

"I am literally—Namjoon, Seokjin, Yoongi, someone, fetch me a bucket. I can't look at this anymore." Hoseok's wailing and he's got a hand covering his eyes and a finger pointing at the two.

Yoongi follows his pointing finger, pausing mid-way to punching Jimin in the liver, and quirks his eyebrow. "What?"

"Look at them," Hoseok says sounding weak and shaky, "they're over there getting all cuddly like they're married or something gross. Why isn't anyone cuddling me?"

"Probably because you're a whiny ," Yoongi says remarkably coolly, considering the fact that he punches Jimin's side as he says this.

Jimin lets out a weak cry and begs for forgiveness, but Yoongi just punches his thigh instead.

Hoseok leans back into his chair and sinks, arms crossed. Jungkook swears he hears him saying about the pot calling the kettle black.

When the talk show finally come to an end, Taehyung's asleep. He had dozed off not too long after Jungkook had begun his ministrations. He smiles down at him fondly and shuffles Taehyung into his lap, hooking his shoulders and the backs of his knees under his arms. Cradling him to his chest, he carries Taehyung into his bedroom he shares with Hoseok and Jimin.

Taehyung grumbles like he might be waking up, but starts snoring loudly just as soon as he's put down and his head hits the pillow. Jungkook slips the blanket over him and gives him one last scratch behind the ear before retreating to his room.