Chapter 4 - Recovery

Yoo Si Jin woke up at the sound of the door creaking open. Slowly opening his eyes, he suddenly blinked in wonder when he realized he was gazing at a familiar ceiling. 

This place... Si Jin thought abruptly with his gaze trailing all over the place to see the familiar ambiance: all this time, he was seated comfortably on the soft, warm couch that dominated the small living room of his beloved Doctor Kang.

His lips drew into a smirk at the sight of his stuffed 'comrade' placed on the floor right in front of him. You made it to her place too, huh. In his peripheral vision, Si Jin saw a faint yellow light gleaming from his left all of a sudden; the smell of matchstick smoke filled his nostrils, and eventually, he felt the distinct sense of someone being there in the same room. 

"What do you think? Do I look pretty with the light behind my back?" 

His dark pupils travelled to the side when he heard her voice; to his surprise he saw a beautiful woman he'd always looked forward to meet after a long time, staring blankly at the stuffed toy with tired, weary eyes—the enfeebled, melancholic gaze she had can make others, most especially Yoo Si Jin, tell that she had been crying for quite a while.

However, her drained expression did not change his perception towards her; with or without the candle serving as a backlight for the small frame of her face, Si Jin still saw her as the most precious jewel in the universe. 

"You're pretty every single moment," The words he kept in his heart came out too quickly; Si Jin could've kept himself silent, but nevertheless, for him, telling the visible, beautiful truth was something he would regret. He picked up the stuffed animal and placed it on his lap, while he saw her eyes follow its direction. 

"I really missed you," Her eyes glistened up with tears once she met Si Jin's gaze; it hurt him seeing her cry like that, helpless and broken. 

"So did I," Si Jin replied, his hands smoothing out the fabric of the stuffed animal's soldier uniform. He wanted to hold her, he wanted to touch her… But somehow even whispering sweet, comforting words in her ear was an effortful thing to do.

She sniffled between her questions, "But... Why? Why didn't you come?" 

"I was busy... working for peace," Of course he was; had it not been for his and Dae Young's firmness and courage for the past 150 days, they could've sent the whole Korean nation in jeopardy. But even so, 'working for peace' was not some information that could satisfy a civilian's question, like the series of queries Kang Mo Yeon threw at him ever since they started their relationship. Giving her the reason that he had been working for peace has become one, overused answer (or perhaps, an excuse).

Si Jin can only tell her vague reasons, to keep her safe. To preserve her...

...even if it meant putting their relationship at stake. It felt like being interrogated—but this time—by the one he has been protecting the most; like what he had experienced in the bomb shelter, Yoo Si Jin cannot simply disclose information to her. 

"But what about your promises to me?" It pained him seeing her bewildered and innocently asking for things he can't reciprocate with fully-detailed answers, "Did they...mean anything to you?" 

"I wanted to come to you. I would have given my everything to come to you," 

She shot him a pained expression on her face, "But you didn't come back,"

Don't cry…

"You didnt come," She sobbed, tears gradually trickling down her cheek. It hurt him a lot, seeing her down like this: no amount of waterboarding, of hunger, of punches, kicks, not even a rain of bullets or a thousand knives stabbed in his chest can match the pain Si Jin felt as he helplessly sat on the sofa and watched his dear Mo Yeon cry.

His fingers dug to the stuffed animal's head thinking that he would be a hypocrite to touch her, or hold her hand, or even say sorry. What was he to do? He had caused her pain already. A thousand times, actually.

He, in his totality, was a burden to her.

All he could resort to was in his mind. 

Kang seonsaeng... I'm sorry.

Kang seonsaeng...

"Yoo Si Jin-ssi," he heard a voice call him, "Yoo Si Jin-ssi?" 

A female voice called him, though Si Jin was positive it was not Kang Mo Yeon's voice; it was slightly low in range and more mature in tone, and Si Jin was a tad bit surprised to see a Korean lady in white, slightly older-looking than Kang Mo Yeon, giving him that warm look of concern when his eyelids unfurled—or at least, his eyelid. His left eye was closed shut, swollen and discolored because of a huge cut on its surrounding area.

Woman in white, a white background... He analyzed what his eyes could perceive. "Did I...make it alive? Or did I make it in heaven?" He struggled to let those words out, but the woman gently rested her hand on his chest, as if telling him to stop talking.

She nodded her head with a smile, "Shhh. You're going to be fine Yoo Si Jin-ssi. Don't force it, you're still recuperating," 

Si Jin felt drowsiness kicking in again. Gosh, I was just up for ten seconds and now I'm feeling weak?

He weakly lifted his left hand to see it filled with needles and IV tubes. With the same arm, he reached for his chest where he was badly wounded and felt the texture of bandages wrapped around his body. "How long was I.."

"Two and a half days," The woman, who seemed to be a nurse, managed to get what her patient was asking for, "You were sent here in MediCamp with two other men, your other friend woke up yesterday, but we had to give him an arm surgery thereafter. He's now recovering," The nurse pulled the curtain on his left and revealed Seo Dae Young sleeping soundly on the bed next to him with a casted elbow. Si Jin smiled in relief, with the certainty that his friend's arm was treated immediately. The captain then veered back to his conversation with the nurse.

"MediCamp?" He asked, and she nodded, the nurse standing up to check his IV bag and made a few drop adjustments.

"It's a Korean-sponsored clinic here, but it is donated to the UN," 

"Like MediCube?" 

"Ani, MediCamp. What's MediCube?" 

He blinked, "It's a donation clinic stationed in.. Ah, nevermind," Si Jin sighed, disregarding the thought. "Where's the other man we came with?" 

She looked above, trying to recollect a few memories behind her mind, "Hmm... I think he went out for particular reasons, but he said he'll be back as quickly as possible–oh he's here," The nurse finally finished checking Si Jin's IV bag when Ahn Jung Joon showed up at Si Jin's bedside. Taking the seat beside it, Jung Joon greeted the nurse with a bow as she did the same, and eventually left his bedside. 

Eyeing Si Jin from head to foot, Jung Joon let out a sigh of relief, "You must have had the worst month of your life back there," 

"Three months," Si Jin corrected.

"Three? At that rate you could've died," 

"I thought so. I seem to uphold my responsibility not to get killed," He chuckled, but recoiled when he realized that sudden jolt hurt his body's current state. Changing the flow of the conversation into a more sober-sided topic, Si Jin asked, "How are you, my friend? And how did you know about our location?" 

Jung Joon looked around, peering if anyone was close enough to listen to their conversation. Closing up a bit to the Captain's ear, Ahn Jung Joon began to narrate his story.

Right after being deported back to Pyongyang, Senior Lieutenant Ahn Jung Joon went on with his usual military life, but to his surprise he was commended by the North Korean government for playing a huge role in tracking leaders who had been involved in abusing their powers for personal gain; the information about the mafia bribery and usage of military personnel by his superior Commander Choi made the NK government decide to expel the turncoat commander from his service and promote Ahn Jung Joon from sangwi to daewi, and even giving him a privilege wish he can make within the Government's power. This unexpected joint mission with the South, which turned out to be successful, made the internal relations of the two neighboring countries less hostile and more united, a news that Si Jin took delight from. 

Just a few months after that, he learned that only three of Tae Baek's renowned Alpha Team came back from a mission somewhere near the Middle Eastern countries. With the knowledge that Yoo Si Jin was among the two soldiers who were missing, Jung Joon painstakingly worked hard to gather all necessary information about the place, which took him approximately a month to cover. After finally enlightening him with all necessary information, the North Korean captain went to his commanding officer and used his trump card (his one-time wish) to spend a month-long vacation in Albania, not divulging his original intent of going someplace far away. 

With his bag filled with casual tourist clothing and only a few, small hideable weapons buried beneath it, Ahn Jung Joon flew to Albania.

"Wah," Si Jin's eyes widened when he heard his story, "I can't believe you gambled your one-time grant with no knowledge on whether we were alive or not,"