Ji Yong POV

“Ji Yongie!”

Knock.

“Ji Yongie”

Knock.

“Ji Yong, I know you’re there!”

Bang. Bang.

“Open the door!”

Bang. Bang.

“He’s not opening. Go to the lobby and get an extra key.”

Silence. “

Ji, please! You’re scaring the of us. Please open the door.”

Silence.

“Open the door so we can talk.”

“Here is the  spare key.”

The door opened. “What the?” Young Bae walked in. “My God! Ji Yong. What the hell happened?” The trashed hotel bedroom was quite a view. Broken lamps, desks and tables flipped, broken pictures, broken glasses, cigarettes butts and mini-bottles of alcohol all over the place. “Where are you?” His footsteps hurriedly walking all over the room. After a while, he found me. I was sitting on a corner of a room, finishing a cigarette. Young Bae crouched in front of me. “What’s wrong?” I inhaled the smoke. “Please talk to me.” I exhaled. “Where’s Emi?”

“She left.” I threw the cigarette and grabbed the package of Marlboro next to me. I took out another cigarette and lighted it. “I’ve tried calling her repeatedly, but her phone is turned off.”

Young Bae looked down, “You knew this eventually would happen… She endured a lot if we’re to tell the truth.”

I smirked. “I want my daughter, that’s all I want.”

“I’m sure Emi will let you see Aeri. Don’t even worry about it…”

“How can I not worry? She doesn’t even care about Aeri, she’s a selfish, unfaithful b-b-b… ! I hate her so much!”

“Don’t say that. You don’t hate her. You love her. You’re just furious that she’s left you.” He placed his hand on my shoulder.

I started laughing. “She’s a selfish, selfish woman!” I looked at the ceiling. My hand trembling due to all the nicotine and alcohol in my system. “She couldn’t wait a little longer! She couldn’t… !” I started crying. “I hate myself for crying for an unfaithful little like her.” I placed my hands on my face. “I hope she’s happy now… She probably ran to his arms! …”

“For God’s sakes stop this !” Young Bae shouted. I looked at him completely confused. “You always do this ! Victimize yourself! Let me break it to you, you’re not a victim Kwon Ji Yong!” I started blinking very fast, my tears still falling. “Emilia endured a lot. The way you treated her.” He frowned. “Man! Any other woman would’ve left you a long ago. Still she remained by your side.”

I quickly stood up. In my current state of mind this could easily go bad. “She cheated!”

Young Bae chuckled with sarcasm. “A couple of stolen kisses? Really?” I looked at him; he seemed disgusted. “I’m not trying to defend her. I told you many times you were crossing the line. Come on man! Stop victimizing yourself and get your together.” He walked away and slammed the door in the process.

I felt the anger rising; I started crashing the place again. As my anger reached its peak, I collapsed on the floor. I closed my eyes and she invaded my thoughts. I remembered how sad and miserable she looked this last months. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for making you suffer.” As the rigid carpet fabric incrusted in the left side of my face I took a deep breath. “Do you also feel sad for making me suffer? For making me a joke? You probably hate me now.” My sobs lessened as my tiredness took control of me. “Let’s not love each other anymore…” That was my last thought before blacking out.

I gradually woke up after feeling someone shaking me. “Ji Yongie, wake up.” The moment I opened my eyes, the headache knocked out the senses of my body. TOP hyung gave me his hand so I could stand up. I couldn’t keep my eyes opened, I was exhausted, my brain hammering against my head, my legs shaking for they were too weak to hold my bodyweight. “You need to eat.” He paused. “There’s soup and ‘hangover’ pills, it will help you.”

I immediately devoured the soup and took the pills. I was staring blankly at the window. “She left?” Top cautiously asked.

I nodded. “She did me a favor. Now I can stop being angry all the time. Now I can be my happy self again. Now I won’t have to see her lying face anymore. I want Aeri’s full custody by the way.” I said determined.

“Don’t make rush decisions.” He warned me.

I smirked and looked at him a little bit confused. “You’ve never being Emilia’s fan. You should be happy we’re done.”

“I’m not happy, Ji Yong.” He wasn’t looking at my eyes.

“I’m dying to see my daughter. I’ve never left her side for too long, I don’t know how to not be near her.” I looked at my phone and dialed her number.

“The person you’re trying to reach is unavailable.” Not sure if I didn’t have more strength to get angry but this time I just breathed deeply.

SeungRi walked inside the room, he was serious. “I just spoke with Emi.”

My eyes snapped open. “What?”

He nodded. “She’s in Seoul. She wants you to know you can see Aeri whenever you want. I’ll bring her to you.”

I frowned and exhaled loudly. “I don’t need an intermediary. I will pick-up my daughter from her mother’s arms.”

“No you won’t.” SeungRi wasn't joking. “You won’t get near Emilia anymore. I will make sure of that.” He and TOP locked eyes for a brief moment. I stared at TOP totally confused. SeungRi walked out of the room.

“Since when SeungRi and Emilia are close?” I asked

“It’s not they’re close. He’s in love with her.”

And I thought I had heard it all. “W-W-What?”

TOP nodded. “SeungRi loves her.”

I felt the anger burning inside of me. “I will whip the out of him.”

“You probably will need to whip all of us then.” TOP said, dryly.

Before I could ask why, he answered, “We all feel some kind of attraction towards Emi. Come on Ji Yong! You know she’s beautiful. You know very well I wanted a date with her before I knew she was already yours.” I do remember that. “Daesung would have her if she wasn’t yours. I would play with her if she wasn’t yours. Young Bae, well, he would probably date her, and SeungRi would definitely marry her if she wasn’t already yours.”

The difference between Young Bae and TOP it’s clear. TOP has not mincing words. Maybe he takes advantage of being the oldest and he knows I won’t easily explode. I have never lied when I’ve said she’s beautiful. Only she thinks she’s a common girl and maybe deep inside that’s what I liked about her. “We booked our flight for tomorrow morning.” He said before leaving.

I was tired too tired to continue with my self-destruction process. I switched hotel rooms, Nan Gook obviously helped me to pay for all the damages and keep this from being released to the public. I was lying on the bed staring blankly at the ceiling. My phone started ringing, I immediately answered. I wanted to be her. “Hello?”

“Annyeo, Oppa.” The voice sounded familiar but I couldn’t figure out who she was. I stared at the screen of my phone. ‘Nana.’

“Yah! Are you playing your games with me?”

She laughed out loud. “Sorry, you’re begging to be mocked.”

“What’s up?”

“Do you think Emilia will freak out if I see you and Aeri tonight? Not sure why she hates me though, but I don’t want to make any trouble. I just want to see you.”

“She left.” I coldly said.

Silence followed. “You mean she had to leave for a meeting or something?”

“We’re done. So, don’t worry she won’t mind if I see you.” I sat on the bed.

 “Do you want to go to a restaurant or something?”  

“I’m not in the mood. Sorry.”

“Do you want me to come to your hotel room?” She asked, softly.

“I-Yes. I mean if you want to.”

A couple of hours later, someone knocked on my door. After seeing Nana standing outside, I opened it. “Why she left?” She immediately asked.

I told her everything. She didn’t say anything for a while. “Are you divorcing her?”

“Probably.” I honestly answered.

I could see a soft smirk on her face. “I’m sure you know this. I l-l-love you.”

I do know she has feelings for me. Being the selfish piece of I am, I just ignore them for I like having her around as my friend. She suddenly leaned towards me trying to reach my lips, I immediately stood up from the bed. “What’s wrong?” She asked.

“I can’t do this. I punished her so hard for being unfaithful. I won’t be unfaithful to her; I won’t make her same mistakes.”

“You know she’s probably with Soo Hyun right now, right?”

I stared at her and frowned. “What?”

“We’ll know she has a weakness for him, it’s a certainty that she went running to him.” It felt like only now could see the real Nana, without her ‘righteous-hipster’ façade.

I grabbed her hips and slammed her against the wall. She stared at my lips with eagerness. “Is this is what you want?” I asked as I fondled her neck with my nose.

“Y-Yes.” She stammered.

I took off her t-shirt. I embraced her; her head laying on my chest. My hands went through her lower back upwards only to reach the clasp of her bra. “I don’t make love to women I don’t love. I . So, don’t expect a special treatment.” She looked at me a little bit surprised. I chuckled. “Actually I’m lying. I even ed the woman I loved, too much that she got tired and left.” She opened widely her eyes. “I’m a ing animal, I as one, and I will treat you as my ing . If you’re still up to that, let’s . So, hard that you’ll probably lose the ability to walk for a week.”

She pushed