►----PART IV----►

There was a silent agreement between them implying they wouldn't talk to each other, and that's what they did no matter how the tension was palpable between them. The two days following the weeding day were eventful for their new composed family and Baekhyun couldn't wait for his short trip to end. They did activities their parents actually forced them to participate in, to bond and learn and know each other. It proved that being around Chanyeol every day, sharing the same house, was a difficult task to accomplish and he hated it. Chanyeol’s last words were hurtful but held truth, so Baekhyun couldn't blame him for that. But every time he would take a deep in the pool, the memory of their kiss under the shower would come back in a rush, Chanyeol's hands on his neck, his lips on his, everything. All of those thoughts rushed in his mind, bringing strange feelings inside him. At the end of the day, he had never felt that frustrated, embarrassed and needy at the same time. Chanyeol was obviously not giving a damn about him and the fact that he would just walk there, half in a bath suit was only affecting Baekhyun in a way that was bothering him the most. He never felt self-conscious about his own body but around the taller he undeniably was. To that, was added the weird feelings he had in his guts, that he would actually consider as butterflies if he was actually in love, which he wasn’t. Still, there was this warmth around his neck spreading south every time Chanyeol was around and if he wasn’t controlling his brain, he knew he would just succumb to the sweet temptation that was Chanyeol. And right now, Baekhyun was so damn craving for it. He needed that touch again but failed totally to communicate it to Chanyeol.

It’s true Chanyeol didn’t address a word to Baekhyun, not because he didn’t want to but because Baekhyun asked for it. It affected him, in an unexpected way, how Baekhyun brushed him off for the second time. If Baekhyun couldn’t see the spark between them, Chanyeol could. Yet he couldn’t go against Baekhyun’s will. Being around the smaller was like torture for Chanyeol. So much, he considered going back to Cannes and spend it with his friends instead of being there, seeing a perfect possibility just vanish in front of his eyes. Chanyeol wasn’t one to make himself suffer in silence. Nevertheless, it didn’t stop him to secretly take pictures of Baekhyun whenever they were all gathered with their family or the smaller was spending time at the swimming pool. Chanyeol would look at the pictures at night, taken with his professional Canon reflex. His throat would tighten every time he would look at a smiling picture of Baekhyun or others pictures on which he was just sublime. Chanyeol tried to categorized his feelings for the older male and for a longtime he thought all this was only lust. He supposed he just needed to get Baekhyun out of his system but the sentiments he felt were far from the ones he usually gets. He could almost touch it from his inside, it was a first for him. This night, at 1.00am, Chanyeol made a decision in his room, and it was consciously that he took a bag and started packing his things. For his sanity, he needed to take some distance from the brunette who was making his head hurt from too much thinking about what he was actually feeling. During two days, he had successfully avoided Baekhyun and hide to their family the fact that something was happening between them or already happened for this case. But now he was tired of doing so, and it was well passed his limits. He was so engrossed in his thoughts while packing his bag, he didn’t hear the little light knocks on the door. It was only when he noticed Baekhyun standing in front of his now closed door that he almost jumped out of his skin, like a frightened cat. He looked at the smaller, all confused, not finding a single reason for him to be there. Maybe he mistook his room with his. For his defense, it was a too large and too spacious room after all.

“Baekhyun...what are you doing here?” Chanyeol sounded surprised by the smaller man’s appearance in his room. But his eyes were holding something Baekhyun didn’t know how to describe yet…something he could associate with pain. But again he didn’t know Chanyeol enough to really know what he was actually thinking inside this thick skull of his.

“I was checking up on you…” Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun as he walked awkwardly in his room playing with his arms.

“I’m fine you really didn’t have to come that far here” Even though Chanyeol said it with no sarcasm intended, Baekhyun couldn’t think this comment weren’t full of derision. Maybe there was a deliberate want to hurt him but again that could have been his -up mind thinking that way. Then Baekhyun decided to man up a little bit.

“I thought that maybe we could talk…we’ve been avoiding each other and…”

“I like chit-chatting with you Baekhyun…really… but I don’t think we have that much to say to each other” Chanyeol’s words were thrown at him harshly.

“So, just because I didn’t want to have with you, now we can’t have a conversation between two adults” there was a slight snicker from Chanyeol that quite rung wrong in Baekhyun’s ear.

“You don’t get it Baekhyun. You think I’m that childish or petty to just put you away because we didn’t have ? How old are you exactly?”  Chanyeol said waiting for a reaction from the smaller but nothing came. He smiled and kept on stuffing his bag with whatever he brought here.

“where are you going?” Baekhyun asked hiding his sight from the elder.

“I decided to go back to Cannes earlier. I don’t feel like I fit here anyway”

Baekhyun wanted to tell him he knew how he felt right now but the closeness they had a few days back seemed gone for the moment and their moment looked as if buried.

“So you are just leaving like that …running away?” Baekhyun added precariously. Chanyeol seemed as he had lost his temper when he harshly threw one of his pants in his big black Longchamp travel bag.

“I think you misunderstood something Baekhyun…I’m not the one running away…I’m not the one scared of his own feelings or having second thoughts on decision already made...I have my own life to live out there and as we figured it out, you are not part of it or either, you don’t want to be a part of it.” One more second and he would go crazy. Chanyeol needed to blow some steam and for that he needed to get away. Chanyeol sure, heard the click of the door making his head snap before Baekhyun walked barefoot on his bed to reach his side of the furniture. In a quick instant, the smaller was getting rid of his own shirt next to him. Maybe Chanyeol’s face wasn’t the most elegant at the moment because the surprise was too much to contain.

“What are you doing?”

“You wanted a one night stand? a good ? I want it too” Baekhyun said with determination “and I think I have been wanting you since the minute I saw you…but I tend to complicate things while it could be easy between us.” Watching Baekhyun admit all this, almost in a panic mode, had him almost break it, his lips cracking in a smirk.  There was a carnal stare from Chanyeol, lust blinding his vision at the sight of the white milky skin in front of him. There were leaned muscles, not that much toned but still shaped perfectly, fitting Baekhyun’s size proportion. There was so much Chanyeol wanted to say at the moment but if he did it would have been a waste of time when everything right now was just perfect. He couldn’t refuse or tone down the attraction he had at the moment. The way he grabbed Baekhyun was savage, urgent but yet careful. Once their lips connected, they both knew there was no going back. Baekhyun detached himself from the taller, searching for air. The way Chanyeol was looking at him was desperate. The taller threw his bag off the bed and pushed Baekhyun flat on the furniture.

“Don’t tell me to stop” Chanyeol prayed as he traced his lips on Baekhyun’s neck, marking his way down to his collar.

“Then don’t stop” Baekhyun brought back Chanyeol to his lips.

“About damn time” Chanyeol muttered and let out a groan that had Baekhyun giggle. The taller couldn’t stop the grin splitting his face, putting on a hold the animal desire sleeping inside of him. Chanyeol leaned down to capture Baekhyun’s lips that were slowly starting to bruise under his care. Trapped between Baekhyun’s legs, he couldn’t stop his hips to move, looking for friction to calm his raging . His hands mirrored Baekhyun’s on each moves. The brunette was pushing him with his dainty fingers, pulling toward him even closer.

Baekhyun could say he was in heaven but that wouldn’t be even right to describe the feeling. He felt a moist sensation on his neck, followed by a sweet pain as his skin was being . For a moment he had lost his ability to speak as words weren’t forming in his brain. The only thing he could do was moan the pleasure out. It seemed like Chanyeol was on a journey on his body, when his mouth traveled south, grazing on his warm skin. Chanyeol’s mouth was absorbing his s tucking, flicking them with the tip of his tongue. Baekhyun couldn’t lower his voice as he expressed openly his arousal. But as Chanyeol stopped under the left bud, the latter couldn’t go unnoticing the scar. It had faded over the years but was still visible. He wondered how painful it must have been for Baekhyun and as he kissed the tortured flesh he hoped he could ease the pain. Instinctively, Baekhyun tried to hide it and created a barrier between this part of his body and Chanyeol’s mouth. His face looked apologetic so Chanyeol moved up to place a kiss on Baekhyun’s lips. It was a passionate kiss that had Baekhyun lock his ankles behind Chanyeol’s back, fumbling with the taller guy’s shirt, proving how impatient he was for Chanyeol.He heard a few words from Chanyeol but only caught an “it’s okay” and with those simple words Baekhyun was compelled and reassured. There was neck bites, tongues lapping, nails scratching fresh skin, hands exploring, hair grabbing until they ended up both . Tangled up, they slowly started a dance, the simple caress sending sparkles inside their minds, the simple pressure of fingers on generating electricity. There was a moment when they both stopped to look at each other, lost in the depth of each other’s eyes. And somehow words weren’t needed here. All they hoped and wanted was just there in this moment and it was up to them to chase it or not. As Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun he his hair giving enough space to bite Baekhyun’s chin. This devilish dance had Baekhyun go crazy and so, as Chanyeol at his own fingers, the simple sight had Baekhyun bit his lower lips.

At the beginning of preparation, Baekhyun had to look for support as the taller accessed him with fingers, stretching him at every . His breath got caught and the moan he held, died in Chanyeol’s mouth that pressed against his. There were whispers from Baekhyun, pleadings to go faster and the taller obliged, preparing him to receive his hard flesh. Baekhyun grabbed the head board of the bed cursing out loud while the younger tore him apart. Though there was a hint of pain, that night, he only remembered the pleasure. As Chanyeol was pounding into him, biting his flesh at each , Baekhyun launched at Chanyeol trapping him in his arms. Chanyeol was so lost into the smaller, into what they were sharing, as he was looking for Baekhyun’s release and his. It didn’t take long for them to reach that point. Chanyeol up Baekhyun’s neck as the guy under him was and grabbing his sides. They kissed, they looked into each other eyes, trying to not put a word on the feeling they had right now but it was there. Again the silence was present as they tried to ease their racing heart. Chanyeol still inside of the smaller, rotated his hips to badge the right angle. Baekhyun reached up pecking Chanyeol’s lips desperately every few seconds, until Chanyeol reached his release. Baekhyun followed when Chanyeol tightly grabbed his damp hair, grunts and moans invading the place.

Baekhyun woke up the morning after, his eyes falling on a sleeping Chanyeol. His hair disheveled was hiding those eyes he was lost into last night. He tried to get away from the lump next to him but the coldness at the other side of the bed had him reconsider and stay closer. His finger traced up Chanyeol’s nose, putting away the hair curtain that formed on his forehead. His hand got suddenly held by Chanyeol who wasn’t sleeping anymore and got kissed gently in the palm.

“Hi” Baekhyun uttered, looking at Chanyeol all smile. Chanyeol’s throat constricted at the sight, like he just had been punched in the guts. Baekhyun’s smile first thing in the morning was something to see. Being the first to appreciate it in that early morning, Chanyeol was blessed beyond words.

“hey…beautiful” he couldn’t express it other way.

“Don’t call me like that” Baekhyun narrowed his eyes at the taller, turning to face the ceiling.

“I meant the smile” Chanyeol teased Baekhyun, kissing his neck and earning in return a pinch on his side. Whining with pain, he added “But you are handsome Baek…can’t lie about that”

“Damn you know how to talk ” Baekhyun rolled his eyes and stretched his poor limbs, that now were hurting with a pain that was good in a certain way. It let plenty time to Chanyeol to shower the 28-year-old man with kisses. They stayed in bed drawing invisible lines on each other arms, cuddling. No one was uttering a word and the silence was underlining the lack of small talks from both part. One was dying to ask the question on the tip of his tongue, fearing to make the other run away. The other one turning the same question a thousand times in his head, wondering what he should say to have the guy understand his heart right now. How could the man even understand something he just couldn’t understand himself at the moment? Baekhyun could feel the taller behind him, spooning him, kissing the freckles on his shoulders. Suddenly there was a feeling of uneasiness that just burst through Baekhyun and made him tense under the touch.

“What is wrong?” Chanyeol asked, the certainness in his voice translating his awareness about how Baekhyun was feeling.

“Nothing…just maybe we should head out? Don’t you think? ...Are you still going to Cannes now?” Baekhyun jumped from a subject to another one.

"One more word and I will end up thinking you are hiding something from me..." Chanyeol whispered in his ears. "About Cannes… I don't know… I might have a reason to stay a bit longer here?" Chanyeol smiled behind an oblivious Baekhyun but he felt how the guy unstuck his body from his, awkwardly putting distance between them. Naturally, Chanyeol assumed something wasn’t right. Though he was dying to know what was going on, he was happy right now and for as far as it lasted he wanted to stay that way.

The following days went extremely great, Chanyeol couldn’t remember when getting to know someone got so enjoyable, eventful and yet scary. The more he knew about Baekhyun the deeper he wanted to get. He knew that it wasn't only about the great ual fusion between them, or the way they will think the same or argue about something and make out just after. But it was also the need of this closeness, the need for Baekhyun’s touches as if without, he would disappear. It was all feelings he was containing inside just because he knew Baekhyun was scared of all this. He didn't need him to say it out loud because he was frightened too, but at a degree less than the smaller. There were so much things Chanyeol could bear. He could handle their parent’s reaction, he could tolerate staying in the secrecy of things for a while, even endure Baekhyun's rejection but he couldn't stomach living in Baekhyun’s pretending world. He wasn't sure about Baekhyun who was rather quiet on his feelings. Chanyeol already knew how, going deeper in this, would just have him burn his own wings. Somehow, this all situation he was in with Baekhyun felt like a summer love; the one you perfectly knew was temporary and end of validity was coming sooner than expected. All was beautiful but one more step, one more day, it was about to become ugly; The addiction he was under because of Baekhyun wasn't about to be tuned down right now.

…

Then came the moment Baekhyun was supposed to leave the day after, the exact time Chanyeol wondered if the smaller was going to say something but nothing came from him. The taller decided it wasn't worth losing his temper and go ugly crazy about something…someone he obviously cherished and a person he didn't want to let go for now. They vaguely had a conversation the last night in bed, after multiple s, in which Chanyeol had informed Baekhyun he was staying longer in France to visit some other friends before going back to South Korea. And to no surprise, there was a lack of interest that was manifest from Baekhyun.

"Can I ask you something?" Chanyeol asked his voice filled with doubt. The simple hum of Baekhyun had him having second thoughts about even asking anything, but still, he had to ask about what he wanted. "We will be both back in Seoul in a few weeks…if I tell you that I want us to keep seeing each other… what would you say?” Chanyeol simply asked, his head deep in the pillow.

There was a long silence that seemed to become a habit of Byun Baekhyun. There were gazes exchanged and Chanyeol could read the distress in Baekhyun’s eyes.

"I-I think it's going to be complicated, your life...mine...it's not compatible. My job is taking me a lot of time. I don't even have time to raise my puppy properly"

"You have a puppy?" Chanyeol surprisingly asked. He never bet Baekhyun could be a pet raiser, he just didn't fit the type.

"That's not the point Chanyeol" Baekhyun said resigned. "I know I won't be able to be fully committed in a relationship. We won't be able to see each other, we will raincheck every time, we won't be able to have time together and finally we will suffer both from the situation. I just don't want that" Chanyeol tried to think about it and he couldn't see what was the problem there. They could still try if they wanted and if Baekhyun yet didn’t have any attach maybe his feelings could grow differently if they get to know each other more. Although the way Baekhyun was reacting to the question was odd. And for some reasons Chanyeol couldn’t stop cogitate on the idea Baekhyun was deeper in this thing that he wanted to let show.

"What are you afraid of exactly?" Chanyeol was fed up with the tension between them, if Baekhyun didn't want to say it he would just force it out.

"I'm not afraid...why... why would I be? It's not like we are a real couple. We are just a phase" Then, Baekhyun’s word echoed in the soundless room.

"So I'm just a phase?" Chanyeol raised his eyebrow in a questioning way. His hands found Baekhyun's cheeks and his lips their way to his. The passionate kiss Baekhyun received got him weak in the knees; It had always been that way when Chanyeol had kissed him anyway. Here it started, this freaking-out feeling Baekhyun had when he was near Chanyeol. His heart was beating too fast, the want too strong, the need too present and then all that was too much too handle for him...All that was too rushed because he didn't know Chanyeol to be in it that deep. "Am I still a phase Baekhyun?" There was no answer but anyway the smaller wouldn't have been able to answer anyway. He was too lost in his thoughts too busy to relive the feeling he just got when their lips touched.

"You are ...and I'm also one for you. I think we should just end this here" Baekhyun felt the pain in his voice when he said it, because getting away from Chanyeol was something that was harder to do day by day. There was a smile on Chanyeol's lips hiding the little pain from the pang of his heart. Gulping and acting as normal, Chanyeol stood up and dusted his pants.

"Still don't want to tell me what you are afraid of?" The absence of words gave Chanyeol an answer to his question "So I guess we won't see each other anymore" Chanyeol came closer and without his approval, hugged Baekhyun on the spot. The receiver didn't have the time to feel comfort enough, the guy was already gone. Baekhyun couldn't stop the suffocating feeling caused by Chanyeol and now he was already missing his arms. The older just wanted to crawl into a ball and cry his misery away.

…

Baekhyun was all ready to leave and despite initially he didn’t want to come here to see her mother getting remarried, he had a great time with everybody. He particularly cherished every intimate moment with Chanyeol, who was now standing behind their new composed family, here to bid farewell to Baekhyun. From where he was standing, Baekhyun could tell Chanyeol was not happy and the grim face he currently had was enough indication. Lena wasn't ready to let him go as she was stuck to his legs, getting fond of his big step brother a tad too much apparently. Baekhyun hugged everybody and got crushed by his father in law. It had been a bit offbeat to hug everybody but not be able to hug Chanyeol how he wished. Secretly he hoped he would receive more than a hug from the taller but from the way he acted lately, it was unlikely it happens. Somehow it was hard to believe that it was all coming to an end when everything has gone so quickly between them. Maybe he had made a mistake from the start, maybe far from here in a place where they both lived and where nobody knew they had some kind of family bound between them, they could be something. But now this utopia seemed farer day by day. He pushed the issue in a corner of his mind while looking for his mother. Anyway, he knew he wouldn’t have to worry about all that happened here; he would have too much to focus on when duty will call at the hospital.

Those days without anything to think, other than enjoying life, had been liberating, resourcing even. He had enough time to do everything else than think and save lives. He had time to learn about someone else life, be less egoistic with people, act his own age, have fun and he had time to fall in love. This last one was what was scaring him the most. It has been hard for him to admit it and embrace it. But here he was now, maybe letting a good thing go because he was scared of too many things. His eyes might have lingered too much on the tall man at the back as he didn't realize his mother was hugging him, crushing his bones and giving all the love she had inside to her only son.

"I'm going to miss you my son. Don’t forget to call" she said balancing him from right to left.

Baekhyun was trying to get a hold of her to make her stop but in vain. While he was holding his mother's shoulder, to temper her, he caught Chanyeol’s eyes on him. He stopped moving and let his mother have her way with him. She took his face in her hand and kissed him on then cheeks until she reached his ears, and what he heard almost made his heart stop.

"Maybe you should say goodbye to Chanyeol Baek. You're not gonna leave him here being sad just like this?!". He had time to understand what she was saying or what she was exactly implying.

"Mum..." His face must have been so awkward because he couldn’t stop the dumb face he displayed.

"Come on Baekhyun, I'm your mother. I might have not seen you for a while but I know you, your little face can’t hide that much feelings" She almost pinched his nose but he succeeded, turning his face on time. "And by the way… you guys are not very discreet...especially in his room” Baekhyun didn’t know if he should be more shocked over his mother being okay with him having a relationship with the adopted son of her new husband or over the fact she just confirmed she had heard him have with him. "I was surprised at first but then I got it and I know you are pragmatic Baekhyun… he is not your brother or in any way related to you...is it just your choice to keep him under the family tag but if you like don’t. I have to say that you might miss something. Chanyeol is a very nice guy and I could see how you two looked at each other”

“I don’t think it is a good idea” Baekhyun said hugging his mother back. 

“It is only up to you but you need to know that it is not a big deal for me or Charles…after all, you are an adult you have been making decision for the last 10 years of your life…who am I to tell you what you have to do? Though I still think I have a right to say about the guy you are going to marry later and if the guy you like happen to be so close to home isn’t that a good thing?” she whispered to him watching at Chanyeol over his son’s back while she was patting his hair.

“I never said I loved him because I don’t…well I think I don’t” There was too much doubt and hesitation in Baekhyun’s speech. He was sure he never talked about Chanyeol to his mother, so how his mother could know something he was deeply hiding inside and refused to acknowledge for himself? She was reading him as an open book. Although everything that occurred between them, she happened to be the one person who knew him the best.

He was ready to go; his final words were kept for Chanyeol who was surprised to see him just in front of him. Baekhyun’s mother had made magically made the all family disappear, leaving the both of them together. Chanyeol was definitely confused as he made a wondering face to the other.

“What was that?” Chanyeol pointed at the back where their family was. Baekhyun have no answer to that question so he just shrugged.

“Believe it or not it’s hard for me to leave you like this” Baekhyun sighed as he watched Chanyeol looking everywhere but at him. the look of hurt betraying his severe face.

“Why? you made your choice. don’t look back on it” Chanyeol snorted.

“Chanyeol...I don’t expect you to understand it but I think I like you…a lot actually…too much in such a short time if I listen to my heart I could say that I’m in love but I don’t want to categorize what we have yet. But to your answer I would like to say yes…I would like to see back in Seoul, meet and see what happen. Maybe we could keep that relationship go further, see if any of that is real.” Baekhyun couldn’t stop himself to talk, fearing that there would be too much silence to fill if he ever stopped talking.

“Are you going to keep on changing your mind all the time…because I don’t think I will be able to follow” Chanyeol tried to cope with the surprise.

“I’m sorry that’s who I am but I’m always true to my words”

“So true that you can’t admit out loud that you are in love with me, as I’m with you?” He couldn’t handle Chanyeol’s face right now, and he had no answer to that except kissing the hell out of the taller in front of their family that didn’t appear shocked at all.

Chanyeol got the urge to press the guy against the car he was leaving in and kiss him back with passion. For his great pleasure, it is just what he did. Taken by surprise, Baekhyun hadn’t had time to realize what was going on. The feeling of lips colliding with his and finding pleasurable spot on his neck, had been enough to have him forget all restrictions he had set for himself, regarding this new relationship that he was treasuring deep inside. Although they didn’t want to, they stopped. Between pants, Baekhyun almost forgot about the card he had saved in his pocket.

“That’s my card. Give me a call when you will be back in Seoul then...I might answer” Baekhyun winked, unsure of what the result could have been and flashing Chanyeol with a nice smile.  

“Then I might call!” Chanyeol looked at the card and held it in the air winking back at the smaller, laughing inside at the way Baekhyun was dealing with everything as a business transaction. But that he wouldn’t tell him now. He would have a lot to make Baekhyun figure out later.

“Please do…so I’ll fit you in my surgeon schedule” What was supposed to be a joke came out too serious and idiosyncratic.

Consequently, this idea didn’t seat well with Chanyeol. He was sure he had grimaced but hid it rapidly with a fake smile. Baekhyun failed to notice how this comment affected Chanyeol in some way. He was too busy smiling because for this short moment that he wished he could capture; he was happy yet scared of what was going to happen next when they will be both at home. Baekhyun set up his things, looking at the steering wheel, ready to go. Chanyeol closed the car door after him and with a last kiss on the little guy’s temple, he just straitened up and waved at the car while Baekhyun was waving at his family and the guy he was expecting to see soon.

Last update tomorrow ;) x.o