For almost ten years, Jung Eunji often dreamed of snow. Trees, land which she stepped on all covered in white. Smoke escaped from every time she parted her lip, but she can’t feel it even when she sure her lip’s color must have changed from the pink into deep blue or maybe violet, she expects nothing else when she feel that this cold could even break her bone. Even so, that girl have no other option than to keep moving, she dragged her weaken leg to no destination, but she still had to because moving still better than stay, believed that maybe just maybe.. she would found anyone or any vehicle she could ask help from.

Someone in college ever challenged her whether she knew what lonely and hopeless feel like were. She took psychology for her minor subject in her third year and they were in the middle of lecture about why people choose to end their time when feeling alone or desperate, surprisingly most of class agree that it could be the best way for them, it was funny for her, that time she really rises her hand and said firmly, no, more than anything.. life is precious. Then that Californian girl dared her opinion. It was time when she finally exploded in front of people, told them that she knew, she experienced one kind from any type of desperate that could exist in the world. Suddenly she feels like threw back to that moment when she was only nineteen; when desperate, loneliness, helplessness was beyond the way she had never been before and would never be again.

Then the wet, familiar smell reached her nose. She bolted awake.

It was the smell of rain.

Jung Eunji inhaled deeply after finally realized that she was safe- awake not in a strange place but on her bed. The girl rubs her face by her palm, her breath still sounds even and rough but much calmer than a few seconds ago when she immediately jolted from her sleep. She hissed softly, clearly hated the fact that though sometimes has passed—it has been some years even—yet she still lived with that nightmare. That ghost hovered and tortured her peace sleep always unexpectedly which sicked her but the girl couldn’t do much about it.

This time too she looks worn out. Just see that reflection in the mirror; pale, dry lip and sweat over forehead—what a sight, she mumbled. It was her this very second even though she sure even Bomi never could picture her being like this. Eunji can see how hopeless she is now, light in her eyes faded. And for some hundred times, she could only break in tears.

“You don’t look good.” Bomi said as she put down a cup of hot latte in front of her, “have you even eat something?” she looked concerned as the color of Eunji’s skin was paler than it normally was.

Eunji shake her head, “Can I order my breakfast here?” she asked in a joking manner, as she almost reach her cup, Bomi snatch it faster make her eyebrow furrowed, “what are you doing?”

“You don’t drink coffee, Eunji-ya. Did something happened?”

She frowned, “I do drink coffee,” Eunji denied while still try to ask her to drink back.

“You better fool ghosts. We knew each other since kindergarten, Miss Jung.” Bomi reminded her stubborn friend before calling one of her workers to make something even though it was two already in the afternoon, far from breakfast hours. “You okay with french toast, don’t you?” she asked Eunji first, girl just nod a yes.

After Bomi’s worker back away, she left with no choice but to answer Bomi’s question, her curious look was always intimidated her, especially when she wants to hide something from her radar. “I just have a bad dream, nothing else.” She explained quietly, it was fact, though she doesn’t want to let her know what that bad dream was about.

Bomi folded her arm on her chest while examined her, “But your work was much lesser these days, how could you had a bad dream?” asked her in confusion. Doesn’t nightmare triggers stress mostly?

Eunji shrugged her shoulder, “Because those nightmares don’t relate to my work.” Replied her simply with lip pressed into a thin line.

Her friend sighed softly, “That’s why you want to ask coffee?”

Eunji nods weakly, “I need to reduce my rest time. That’s why.”

“But weather turned colder this week and this is your golden time to rest, you may need to work crazily again soon.. new semester season, new students.” Bomi again tries her best to remind her best friend who doesn’t reply and instead look away from the window.

She followed Eunji’s gaze, but nothing particularly good outside; the street is quite empty, only a few people walked fast while hugged themselves try to restrain wind and rain. This side is new for her, Eunji didn’t fond of rainy days back in her younger days, she loves sunny days much more so when she let out her thought, her friend turned and give her a shy smile.

“I developed new hobby,” Eunji admitted simply before turned her attention back to outside again.

Bomi chuckled at her answer, “So it was watching rain?”

Her friend hummed and nod, “I want to say ‘Dancing in the Rain’ but this is not ’50 anymore.” Girl try to humor herself because it was quite embarrassing on her part, that’s why she doesn’t even bother to check on Bomi.

“Silly.” Bomi mocked lightly, “Children (old friends) would laugh hysterically if they know this fact.” Make Eunji rolled her eyes, try to play cool.

Their conversation cut when Se Jeong comes with Eunji’s breakfast, she smiles brightly, greets Eunji who also gave her a wide smile and mouthed a thank you. Before she went back to the kitchen, Bomi holds her worker a moment to introduce each other properly.

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