“Could you ask it without your Mr. Smarty Cover-up?”

Again with that? I don’t understand why she keeps on calling me such juvenile name. I already told her everything, all that I have felt for the past three months especially to what recently happened to me which was just last night. I was in my most honest state, she shouldn’t be demanding for more, right? She is one mind-boggling woman. Actually, I was lucky enough to reach her in the cinemas after that drive-dash I had. She was indeed with a guy who seems to look so much younger than the both of us, but he was tall.

He is definitely not a threat.

I am not afraid of him.

Height doesn’t define anything.

Back to the topic of discussion, Han Iseul is apparently asking for such obsession again. As I blink and stare in space, I grip on my laboratory gloves tightly. “I can’t. It’s difficult.” I answer and try to gaze at her as quick as I can. I hear a chortle from her, a mocking chortle. I don’t like it, I want her to stop. It is exasperating in the ear. “Alright then. I’m easy to talk to.” She tells with such sardonic tone which, again, infuriates me. I gaze at her again and saw her turning her whole body to her date, whose name is Joon. “Do you wanna buy popcorn or we just cuddle while watching?” She asks the boy.

I find myself pouting hard when I heard it.

My heart pounds fast again and I had the urge to shout at her because she is making me feel sick again.

With my tightly closed eyes, I speak. “Fine fine fine.” I give in completely in between groans before opening my lids again to look at her. She automatically turns to me with her impish grin. She is utterly enjoying this make-the-smart-guy-seem-like-a-fool game and it made my face heat up. But somehow, I was relieved. Relieved that her smile right now. . . is because of me. Not because of the guy on the other side, nor anyone. It is for me, her endearing smile that I’ve always adored. What everything made even worse in my system was when she tapped my cheeks and gave me a wink.

She winked at me.

Why did she wink at me.

Isn’t that a precursor of flirting?

She is a very flirtatious woman.

But at least, it is for me.

Not for the guy on the other side.

I shall spare her.

I take a deep breath first. “Okay, shoot it.” She signals me and clasps her hands together. She gave me that sweet and patient smile while looking back at me. It made me turn away once again as I grip on my kneecaps this time. She is very inconsiderate. If she wants me to tell such ludicrous thing, she should at least cooperate and not give me such look that makes me sick.  “Han Iseul. . .” I call while staring at the carpeted floor of the cinema’s waiting area. “Will you be my girlfriend. . .” I muffle and I know it came out rather incoherent.

I did not expect my mouth to fight against my mind right now.

It wouldn’t open properly.

My heart rate was rising once again and I think it’s because I ran so fast or maybe I am really sick.

But back to the topic, I have never asked such question in my whole life. It’s my first time to lower my intelligence in this way, in a romantic way. Or at least that’s what I know. But I think. . . ever since I met her, I’ve been lowering every single thing about me in a romantic way, I believe. I need to level down with her, she is not as intelligent as me.

But she is not stupid.

She is actually quite witty. Adding to her very lively and bright personality. She is the total opposite of me which makes me need her. I might be having ninety percent of intelligence but the remaining ten that I don’t have and could never have in me. . . she has. She has it and has always been there to share with me. “First, you should look at me and second, you should make it clear.” She speaks cutting me off from my short trance. I groan in frustration as she demanded again.

She should have just lived with that, I know she still heard it anyway.

I need her ten percent in my life. I should be patient. I need my ten percent to fill my life with life – I know, it sounds redundant but my life has always been lifeless until she came. So I believe, I would need her. I might be very demanding but it might be a long-term need.

So I shift my body this time, disregarding all thoughts off of me. “Iseul, will you be my girlfriend?” I say loud and clear and somehow, I start holding on my breath as I wait. My heart rate is elevating once more, I couldn’t breathe properly which makes it very bizarre of me to still hold onto my breath, but I still did. My stomach starts acting up as well and I feel like throwing up as I look at her.

I feel so unwell.

“Yes.” She tells and the moment I heard such answer, the breath that I’ve been holding all came out in one go and I clutch onto my throbbing chest. The illness I was feeling disappeared like in a snap. So the physical attributes that this feelings has been giving me doesn’t have to do with any illness. Therefore. . . it’s just really because of her! So they are indeed interconnected. My mental health is the main cause of my physical pain and my mental state was literally HAN ISEUL HAS A DATE the whole time.

So I am not sick.

Yes. I should have thought of the body’s connections with the mental health. I didn’t want to believe it was because of that at first.

“I knew it. It’s not alien parasites. I knew it, this is your fault.” I muffle while panting. She responds with a laugh. “Are you freaking serious?” She asks. I give her a curt nod before standing up rather quickly. “I’ll let you get back to your date. Thank you for the time, uh. . . girlfriend.” I tell before sprinting away. I am still a bother to a planned meeting like theirs and so I should leave. I asked for five minutes and I even exceeded, I should really leave.

And also. . . I wanted to escape.

But apparently, she followed me out.

In the end, I didn’t have a choice but to still interact with her after such confession.

_ _ _

“A-are we really a couple now?” She asks softly while we stand right in front of each other by my car. I lend my smile to her as we meet eyes. I let myself be immersed of her natural beauty that I always noticed though never let out through words. And just now, she has gone more beautiful and perhaps it was because of our new stage of relationship.

She is now for me to have.

Mine.

I give her a gentle nod. I wanted to hold her on the face but my hand would tremble. I wanted to move closer but I might go stiff. However, my gaze would always turn soft whenever I look back at hers. “So I hope you would enjoy watching the movie. I got to go now. I left my work there in the lab.” I mutter and I noticed myself that my voice came out rather deep and gentle. My heart rate was rising again but somehow, I liked the feeling of it this time.

Because now I know, that it isn’t alien parasites.

But the feelings I have for Han Iseul.

My girlfriend. First girlfriend.

I watch as her cheeks flush red while looking back. “Uh. . . Kyungsoo, than—“ I didn’t let her finish her sentence as I lean down and gave her a light kiss on the cheek before quickly entering my car swiftly. I start the engine right away and give her a honk be