Location: Incheon International Airport
Time: 12 Weeks Later

Chanyeol was so happy to finally be back in South Korea, that he was almost to the point of skipping through the airport. He was home; he was finally in the same country as EXO again and he could not wait to see the other members. He couldn’t wait to see Baekhyun and finally give him what he promised. No more interruptions, no more waiting, no more excuses. He wasn’t going to keep running in fear. Baekhyun still wanted him after all of this time and Chanyeol wanted Baekhyun – god he wanted him. He hated himself for everything that had happened that kept them apart – he realized he was just being a coward and hoped Baekhyun would forgive him.

Chanyeol lowered his cap and scrunched his hooddie tight, hoping fans would not recognize him. He was at the airport with no security to protect him so he quickly searched for an exit. He paused for a moment inside of the VIP lounge to grab some coffee before his eyes caught something that made him freeze in place.

He quickly walked over to a businessman who was sitting at a table in the corner. “Excuse me,” Chanyeol said urgently, “may I please look at your newspaper really quick?”

The man looked up at Chanyeol with an annoyed expression that quickly turned into wide eyes as he recognized Chanyeol. “You’re…you’re one of them,” he gasped. The man held the paper out to Chanyeol with a sympathetic expression. Chanyeol quickly grabbed the paper and flipped to the front page – almost bending over in angst.

Hands trembling, he handed the paper back to the man and muttered 'thanks' before running out of the airport as fast as he could.

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Even though Chanyeol was only an hour away from the hospital, the journey to get there felt like an eternity. He had to hail a taxi outside of the airport and battle the slow moving traffic, becoming increasingly more inpatient. He kept his head down low in the back seat hoping that fans wouldn’t see him and follow his taxi. The last thing he wanted was to be questioned about things he didn’t want to talk about or worse, being told something he wasn’t prepared to hear.

He had to get to the hospital as quickly as possible. He didn’t want to regret getting there too late. All he wanted to do was scream and cry but that wouldn’t do him any good right now because he didn’t know how bad the injuries were. The taxi finally arrived at the side of the hospital and Chanyeol sprinted to the front before skidding to a halt. The entire main entrance was swarming with media and fans. He pulled his hat down low and made a run for it, pushing past everyone without stopping, until he was inside.

“Hello, who are you looking for?” the secretary behind the information desk asked politely. “Hi”, he said quickly, “my friend was admitted here and I need to know what floor he is on.” “Name?” she asked.

“Byun Baekhyun,” he replied, shaking.

The woman began typing on her computer and suddenly stopped, staring up at Chanyeol suspiciously. “I’m sorry but information on that patient is classified. I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

“What? No!” Chanyeol said in a worried tone, “My name is Park Chanyeol. I’m one of Baekhyun’s group members. Here,” he said as he handed the woman his ID card.

The woman frowned as she slowly picked up the phone, “One moment.” After a brief conversation she hung up, “He is in the ICU on level 6 Mr. Park. When you get up there one of the nurses will help you.”

All of the blood drained from Chanyeol’s face, “I’m sorry, did you say the ICU?” The woman could only look at Chanyeol with a sympathetic face before he dashed for the elevator.

It was a weird feeling for Chanyeol to be back in the ICU again, only this time he was a visitor and not a patient. He could barely hear the nurse call out his name over the pounding sound of his heartbeat against his ribs. “Chanyeol!” Minji called out. “What happened? Where is he? Is he okay?” he said so fast that the questions almost combined. Minji offered a soft smile, “Which one do you want to see first?”

Chanyeol’s eyes widened, “Which one? Are you telling me that Baekhyun isn’t the only one in here?” he said sternly. Minji bit her lip, “No…” she said slowly, “Chanyeol, what have you heard about what happened?” “Nothing!” he wailed, “I just got back from Chicago, saw the news about the crash, and came straight here!” “Oh god,” she gasped, grabbing Chanyeol by the arm and sitting him down in a chair.

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Baekhyun was in Room 63. Chanyeol sat in the chair beside his bed unable to think. His mind was racing – all he wanted to do was cry, or scream, or hit something – but he had no energy left. All he could do was stare down at the face that he had grown to love so much, a face that was barely recognizable beyond the cuts and bruises.

Baekhyun had sustained a minor head injury plus four broken ribs, a broken leg, and a major puncture wound to his thigh in the crash. Chanyeol was told that Baekhyun’s injuries were the result from smashing his head against the window upon impact and his door being crushed inwards when their car collided with the retaining wall. He had to have an emergency operation to stop his internal bleeding. The doctors were still waiting for him to wake up to determine the significance of the damage.

Chanyeol reached down and softly smoothed away the hair that had fallen across Baekhyun’s cheek. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, “I was being a coward and now I’m too late. I know I said that we couldn’t be together because we would hurt the group and our friendship but I should have trusted you – trusted you to be gentle with me.”

“I lied to you. I lied to you about a lot of things. You are the most unique person that has ever entered my life. I’ve never had someone who loved me passionately and understood my flaws – someone who needed me, protected me, wanted me for who I am – not what I am. When I am around you I feel so happy and thankful to be sharing this life with you. You are the only person who can make me feel shy but excited, scared but impulsive, protective but content.”

“I pushed you away because I was scared. I knew that if I admitted to having feelings for you, I would never be able to go back. I would never be able to let you go. But that wasn’t the only reason I pushed you away puppy. I…I… was scared to be gay. Not so much of what people would say about me but the things that gay men do – I didn’t think that I could handle that.”

“I was worried that you would be disappointed in me because I couldn’t be what you wanted – what you deserved. I knew that if you asked me to do something, I would do it. And that scared me even more because I didn’t want to be in a relationship where I dreaded every intimate moment. I want to cherish every moment that I have with you.”

“I very much regret not being honest with you these past few years. Do you remember when you tried to kiss me last time? It took every ounce of energy in my being to walk away from you. I wish you had tried again. I wouldn’t have been able to walk away again.”

“If you could hear me right now you would probably be raising an eyebrow at my intentions but I am being serious. Jihoo has been on my case about this for years. I didn’t want to believe him but you were so persistent.”

“I had a lot of time to think when I was in Chicago. I thought about you a lot – just you, as a person. I realized that you would never push me at a pace that I wasn’t comfortable with. You would be patient and wait for me every step of the way. I also realized that you know me better than anyone – you would never hold my insecurities against me and never be disappointed by my limits. You would treasure everything that I could give you because that is who you are Baekhyun. You are my everything and that’s why I am falling in love with you.”

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Sehun had been the unlucky winner of Room 61. Chills ran up the back of Chanyeol’s neck as he stood outside of the door. He took a deep breath, preparing himself for what he was about to see. Chanyeol let out a faint cry when he looked over at the bed. Sehun was barely recognizable under all of the bandages and tubing – lifeless. Luhan was already sitting in the visitor chair with his head down on the bed.

When Chanyeol closed the door, Luhan gazed up with an expression of angst and shock. “Chanyeol,” he croaked, looking even more confused. He looked completely shattered. The look of devastation on Luhan’s face made Chanyeol’s chest ache.

“Hi,” he whispered. “You’re…you’re here? When did you get back?” Luhan said slowly. “A few hours ago,” he managed to reply before Luhan ran up and crushed him into a long hug. In that moment, Luhan couldn’t be strong anymore. He had been holding in his emotions for so long that he just crumbled in Chanyeol’s arms.

“It’s okay Luhan,” he soothed, “I’m here now. Everything is going to be okay.” Chanyeol could only imagine what Luhan was going through. He loved Sehun like a brother – it was probably ten times worse for Luhan, Sehun’s boyfriend.

They stood like that – in a warm embrace – for a good 15 minutes until Luhan started to pull back. “I missed you,” he sniffled, “I missed you so much.” Chanyeol’s eyes began to fill with tears as he pulled Luhan into another hug. “I missed you too,” he whispered into Luhan’s ear.

For over an hour they sat there as Luhan told Chanyeol the story of what had happened. Suho, Kai, and himself had been traveling in the car behind Sehun, Baekhyun, and their manager Youngmin. Everything had happened so quickly. One minute they were hiding down in the seats to avoid sasaeng fans that had been following them and the next minute their driver was screaming and swerved into the hard shoulder before coming to a stop. They could only watch in horror as the car that was following them began to frantically swerve side to side before over-compensating and slamming into Sehun and Baekhyun’s vehicle. The impact sent their vehicle spinning into the emergency lane before it crashed into the retaining wall.

Paramedics arrived on scene within minutes. Even though the other vehicle flipped and rolled multiple times, the driver and passengers came out with only minor cuts. Sehun and Baekhyun had to be cut out of the debris by the fire department. All the boys could do was stand there and watch, terrified, not knowing if their friends were dead or alive. It was only after the arrived at the hospital that they found out that their manager, Youngmin, had died at the scene. Now, Baekhyun and Sehun were in the ICU, fighting for their lives. Baekhyun was riddled with broken bones and Sehun had only a 10% chance of living through the morning.

“You know,” Luhan said quietly, “this Saturday would have been three years since we got together. We were going to go have a picnic on the beach at sunset.” Luhan bit his lip, “Now…now I’m going to be alone.”

Chanyeol wrapped his arm around Luhan and squeezed him gently. “You’re not going to be alone, I promise.” “Can I tell you a secret?” Luhan asked, “I was going to ask Sehun to marry me that night.”

Chanyeol gasped, unsure if he should be excited or upset for his friend. “Before,” Luhan continued, “I was worried about whether he would say yes or no. But now…I’m worried that if I close my eyes for even a second, he’s going to die.”

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Suho arrived at the hospital approximately an hour later looking absolutely exhausted. He had been at the Seoul Metropolitan Police Agency since the crash, writing a statement and answering questions about the accident. He walked into Baekhyun’s room and jumped back in surprise, “Chanyeol?!” Chanyeol grinned, jumping to his feet to embrace his hyung in a warm hug. “You’re back!” Suho yelled “I missed you!”

“I missed you too hyung.” “How are you? Why did you just leave without saying goodbye?” Suho asked.

“I couldn’t. Sooman came in, told me that I was going to Chicago and that I couldn’t talk to anyone while I as there.”

Suho shook his head, “I’m glad you’re back. Baekhyun had been moping around the dorm the entire time.

Chanyeol smiled; pleased that it appeared that Baekhyun had missed him just as much as Chanyeol missed Baekhyun.

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Location: Room 63, Seoul National University Hospital
Time: Thursday at 9:31 pm

Baekhyun finally decided to wake up. Chanyeol had been sitting in the chair, working on new music on his lap top, when he heard a small groan. Chanyeol quickly closed his lap top, grinning ear to ear, as Baekhyun’s eyes fluttered. Baekhyun slowly opened his eyes and locked his gaze on Chanyeol. “Hi baby,” Chanyeol whispered. Baekhyun closed his eyes again and moaned. Chanyeol leaned down and gently his cheek, “I know it hurts,” he whispered.

Chanyeol stood back while the nurse checked Baekhyun’s vitals and adjusted the level of his pain medication in his IV. Chanyeol quickly hurried back over as Baekhyun weakly moved the oxygen mask away from his face. “Why,” he croaked. “I leave you alone for ten minutes and you get yourself into a hot mess,” Chanyeol teased. Baekhyun attempted to laugh before wincing in pain, “Ow,” he whimpered.

“Shh…Go back to sleep my love. I’ll be right here waiting for you,” Chanyeol said as he ran his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair. “Okay,” he whispered as he slowly closed his eyes and fell back to sleep.

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Suho and Chanyeol returned to the hospital the next morning. Luhan had stayed all night in Sehun’s room, refusing to leave, since Sehun was defying the odds and slowly improving. They stopped by Baekhyun’s room first. As they walked in, Minji was walking out looking highly annoyed. “What’s wrong,” Chanyeol asked her. “He’s being stubborn. Please talk to him,” she replied as she closed the door behind her.

“I’m not hungry,” Baekhyun said stubbornly. Chanyeol paused and looked back at Suho and Kai, “Could you give us a few minutes alone?” “Of course,” Suho said as he bowed and they walked out. Chanyeol turned back around as Baekhyun was sitting up in his bed pushing his food tray to the side.

Baekhyun looked up with wide eyes, “you’re…you’re here..I thought I was dreaming,” he said, baffled. Chanyeol lightly chuckled, “You’re not dreaming. I’m really here.” Baekhyun continued to stare at him looking lost for words. “What’s wrong?” he asked. Baekhyun let out a big sigh, “God you look incredible,” whipping away a tear, “I missed you so much.” Chanyeol slowly sat down on the side of the bed trying to not jostle Baekhyun. “I missed you too,” he said quietly, “very much. When I saw the news in the paper, I was so scared. I…I thought I had lost you.”

Baekhyun reached up and pulled Chanyeol closer so that their foreheads were pressed together. Chanyeol closed his eyes, breathing in the familiar scent of Baekhyun’s skin. “Why did you leave me again?” Baekhyun whispered. Chanyeol slightly whimpered, “Oh Baek, I didn’t leave to get away from you. I had to go. Sooman said that I didn’t have a choice. But look, look at me. I’m doing great now.” Chanyeol pressed a soft kiss to Baekhyun’s cheek, remembering the promise that he had made.

Chanyeol pulled back to gaze into Baekhyun’s eyes. His stomach was doing somersaults as he prepared himself to deliver on his promise. Was he brave enough to do it? This was his chance – he had been waiting for this moment for four years – he had denied Baekhyun long enough. He slowly started to lean in but was stopped by Baekhyun pressing his finger to Chanyeol’s lips, “Wait,” he whispered.

“I…I…Not like this…please,” he said softly, almost begging. Although he was disappointed, Chanyeol understood what Baekhyun was trying to say. He smiled and leaned forward to press a gentle kiss over Baekhyun’s heart, “I promise,” he whispered.

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Location: Room 61, Seoul National University Hospital
Time: Saturday at 1:14 pm

Sehun slowly opened his eyes to see Suho, Chanyeol, Kai, and Luhan playing with their electronic devices. He didn’t say anything but locked his gaze on Luhan for about ten seconds before falling back to sleep. Luhan couldn’t stop crying with relief as his fellow group members comforted him. “I told you, you weren’t going to be alone today,” Chanyeol said with a smile.

“This is the best anniversary gift Sehun could have ever given me,” Luhan replied.

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The boys didn’t get to spend a lot of time at the hospital after that. Come Tuesday morning they had to regroup and fulfill their EXO schedule. They had a tour in North America, commercial shoots, and interviews to do. They were also required to appear at the court hearing for the accident. The sasaeng that had been driving the vehicle had been charged with one count of vehicular manslaughter, reckless driving, and destruction of public property, among many other related charges. It was the harshest punishment to ever come down on a sasaeng fan in KPOP history.

Baekhyun and Sehun had to stay behind in Seoul while the remaining three EXO members had to fly to the United States for a month. Baekhyun promised Luhan that he would look after Sehun for him. Baekhyun couldn’t sing with his four broken ribs and had a difficult time moving around with his broken leg so Seunghwan said that he could stay behind.

The boys called and texted each other during every free moment that they had – often making themselves exhausted from staying up all night talking on the phone. During the third week, Chanyeol was woken up by the sound of his phone buzzing at 2:12 am. “Baekhyun?” he answered, still half asleep.

“Hi,” Baekhyun replied quietly, “are you alone?” Chanyeol glanced at Kai who was sound asleep. “Hang on,” he said as he wandered into the suite lounge, closing the bedroom door behind him.”

“Okay, now I am, what’s wrong?” Chanyeol asked, concerned. “Nothing,” Baekhyun sighed, “I just wanted to talk to you about something.”

“At two something in the morning?” Chanyeol asked suspiciously. “Yeah..um..maybe I should have waited…I’m sorry.” “It’s okay, I’m awake now. So what do you want to talk about?”

There was a moment of silence on the phone before Baekhyun sighed, “Um..well something has kind of been bothering me for awhile.” “What?”

“Minji told me that you were in my room after my surgery. I know I was pretty out of it but…did you say something to me?” “No,” Chanyeol replied slowly, thinking hard about what Baekhyun was talking about, “you were still sleeping when I first came to visit you.” “Oh, okay, never mind then.” “What is it Baek? Did you think I said something to you?”

“No…well..I thought I could hear you talking to me…saying something about why…why you pushed me away…but I don’t know…I was probably just dreaming.” Chanyeol’s heart started racing at the thought that Baekhyun had actually heard him somehow, “You weren’t dreaming,” he croaked.

“What?” Baekhyun said seemingly genuinely shocked. “I was talking to you…while you were unconscious,” Chanyeol admitted. “I…why?” Baekhyun asked quietly. “I don’t know,” Chanyeol replied, biting his lip nervously, “It was easier that way.”

“You can tell me anything,” Baekhyun whispered. Chanyeol closed his eyes, “I know, but it’s still hard to be that vulnerable.”

“Tell me again,” Baekhyun demanded.

Chanyeol’s eyes flew open wide, “What?”

“Tell – me – again,” Baekhyun persisted.

“I..”

“Please?” Baekhyun pleaded.

Chanyeol let out a long sigh, “Okay, I um… I started off by saying that I was sorry for being a coward and pushing you away. I should have known that you were serious about me. I trust you with my life; I should have trusted you with my heart too.”

Baekhyun was silent so Chanyeol continued, “I…I was lying when I said that we couldn’t be together because it would hurt the group. It was more than that.”

Chanyeol swallowed hard, “Baekhyun…do you have any idea how beautiful you are? I know that sounds weird talking about a guy but it’s true. You are so genuine, funny, handsome, smart…you are everything. All of those times when I felt invisible, you saw me – me, Park Chanyeol – not Chanyeol from EXO. The things you make me feel leave me confused about everything that I thought I knew about myself. I didn’t just push you away because of the other members; I pushed you away because I was scared. I was afraid of losing myself to you.”

There – Chanyeol finally said it – and god did it feel good to have those words off of his shoulders. But he still felt the need to further explain to Baekhyun why he was so afraid; he owed him that much.

“But…I was scared for another reason too. I.. I…” Chanyeol suddenly struggled to find the courage to continue. “Why were you scared Chanyeol,” Baekhyun whispered. “I was scared to be gay. I didn’t know if I could handle being gay and I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me.”

“Chanyeol?” Baekhyun said slowly, “I’m scared too.”

Chanyeol let out a small sigh of relief, “I realized that you would never judge me or criticize me for what I couldn’t be. You would love me unconditionally just like you have done all of these years. And that’s why I…I..”

“You what?”

“Why I am falling in love with you.”

“Baby,” Baekhyun said, letting out a shaky breath, “Please come home.”