Andante Again

supergelie

 

Started: July 25, 2015

Finished: January 29, 2016

 

It was fall; his hands were clamped together in heat, and his feet were rested comfortably under the table. He was seated opposite to Jongin. It took a while before he convinced himself that the idea of coming down with his annoying half-brother to one of the oldest cafés in town was rather a good thing. That was, of course, until Jongin started blabbing about his ability to see the future, which was extremely inaccurate.

 

It wasn’t a big deal for Chanyeol, well, at least not anymore since a year ago when he finished medical school. It wasn’t actually being able to see the future entirely (which is what he’d been trying to explain to Jongin almost half of his life but alas, it was to no avail), but only bits of it, on a condition where he has to stare at a person’s eyes. It’s mainly seeing his future relationship with that particular person (which is a lot useful than it sounds because it has saved him from countless heartbreaks).

 

“When was the last time you watched your future?” Jongin asked after a quick sip from his coffee.

 

Chanyeol was staring into the horizon; their seats were beside the glass window, giving him a clear view of the sky as it woke. “I don’t know,” was his response.

 

“You don’t know,” Jongin reiterated. “What if you missed the right person?”

 

So far the only futures he had seen were depressing, if not downright tragic. He might have even extended his life owing to this ability.

 

“There is no right person,” He murmured, fog coming out from his mouth as he continued, “What if the main reason why I have this ability in the first place was only to watch my future with different people come and go, and then someday I’ll forget, until it’s gone, until I’m dead?”

 

“You’re not making any sense.” Jongin replied, taking another sip from his coffee.

 

For 25 years, all he ever cared about was finding an explanation (a humane explanation) on how he got this weird ability in the first place. However, from those years, he earned no explanation, only a degree in medicine, teaching authority, and his new identity as Professor Park.

 

“You wouldn’t understand.”

 

“Look, just try.”

 

He remembered Jongin saying the same thing last week, and a week before that, and a week before that week, until he’s convinced that what they’re doing was a waste of time. There were times when Chanyeol saw futures he particularly liked but didn’t end well, and he’d tear up because he knew he couldn’t afford going through those. He didn’t want to see his future because after sixty seconds, he’ll be forced to let it go. He was a coward, that much he knew.

 

“Chanyeol.” Jongin called.

 

Chanyeol sighed, massaging his temple as he leaned back on his chair. Maybe, somewhere deep inside him, he didn’t want to be a coward anymore. “Alright…but this will be the last time.”

 

He knew that probably translates to ‘This will be the last time for this week’ to Jongin but he couldn’t care less since the latter’s persuasion power is beyond normal. His attention shifted to Jongin’s cup when it illuminated. He turned to his side to watch the sun slowly rise up into the sky, supplying the world of the light it needs. The café’s door chimes started ringing continuously with inconsistent intervals as more people started occupying the tables. Most of them professional workers leaving early for work, some students studying for prelims. The fact that the café is open for 24 hours and its location being only a 5 minute walk away from the train station were enough for the place to belong under the must-visit list. They practically grew up with it and watched as workers come and go.

 

“Shall we start?” Jongin said with a big grin on his face.

 

They’ve done it so many times that Chanyeol was oddly familiar with it already. All he needed to do was stare at someone until that someone stared back at him, and then the 60-second preview will start. Their first target came as a surprise when he accidentally looked up and saw a girl staring at him. The whole world stopped, all their frictions fall into a pause, and gravity disappeared.

 

This tempo is larghetto. His future kicked off with a fresh start--all smiles and giggles. She was the epitome of sweet gestures, so to say. Then came the excuses, broken promises, and forgotten dates. Chanyeol didn’t forget them; she did. And then the whole cycle of fights and questions of trusts started. He thought it was a pity. It could’ve been her but then after 60 seconds, it’s not. He snapped back, the noise almost suffocating him when the world started moving again and the girl walked pass him.

 

“How was it?” Jongin asked.

 

Chanyeol shook his head, wondering if a time will come when he would nod and smile to Jongin’s question. He looked around again. He found a girl sitting by herself across their table. Her hair was long and curly at the ends. She looked like she was waiting for someone. While she was looking around the place, slightly craning her neck, her eyes met Chanyeol’s. And the cycle started. This one is presto. She was having problems with her boyfriend, until she met Chanyeol, and decided to break it off with her boyfriend. She was a really happy person, very talkative. Until she started acting strange. Chanyeol can see why she was having problems with her past lover. She was clingy and overly attached. Not someone you would want to spend the rest of your life with. The preview ended. Chanyeol sighed. He won’t get anywhere with this.

 

“So?” Jongin asked, eyes full of anticipation.

 

“I told you, right? There is no right person.”

 

Jongin looked disappointed. Chanyeol would be too, but he’d already cut too much strings with each time he tried to play a tune and failed. This song was already broken. No string will ever fix it.

 

“Whatever.” Chanyeol breathed. “Look, I have class later—actually, we have class later. So I’m going to pay at the counter now then we can go.”

 

Jongin pouted. “Fine. Buy me a take out!”

 

Chanyeol always paid. He’s a professor, it’s not right to let Jongin pay since he’s still a student. His student to be exact. He walked to the counter, noticing another customer coming in. Chanyeol leaned on the counter and waited for the cashier lady to return. The customer who just walked in stopped beside him. He’s short, Chanyeol noticed when he squinted to see, and had auburn brown hair. It was only a random observation. Chanyeol shook his head and shifted his attention to the figurine displayed on top of the counter in between them. It was an hourglass, sculptured and turned into art. The name of the cafe itself is Clockworks, with regards to the owner’s grandfather who was a clock maker. The cafe was also filled with clocks, designed in different varieties. After a while, the cashier lady finally came back.

 

“Yes?” She asked Chanyeol.

 

“I’m going to pay. Table 15.”

 

The cashier lady checked the bills and typed on the receipt. Chanyeol passed the bill and waited for the change, and as he did so, he noticed another staff coming to entertain the customer beside him.

 

“Baekhyun, hi, good morning,” The staff greeted delightedly.

 

The customer, Baekhyun, breathed out with a smile. “Seems like everybody knows my name now.”

 

His voice, Chanyeol noticed, was soft, like cotton candies.

 

“Of course. You’re a regular here.” The staff replied, smiling. She seemed to be fond of him, Chanyeol observed. But he’s never seen him before, even though he considered himself a regular in this cafe. “So, what are you ordering? The usual?”

 

Chanyeol lightly tapped his fingers on the wood, taking note of the time.

 

“Yes please.”

 

“Where’s your brother? You usually come together.”

 

“He’s already at the bus station. He slept pretty late last night.”

 

The staff nodded while wrapping the food. “Here you go, Baekhyun. Enjoy. It’s nice to see you happy and healthy.”

 

Baekhyun smiled. “Thank you.”

 

Finally. Chanyeol thought as the cashier lady started printing the receipt while collecting the change. She held out her hand and Chanyeol collected the coins on her palm. When the staff pulled her hand back, she accidentally hit the figurine lying at the middle. Chanyeol immediately held out his hand to catch it. He wasn’t the only one with quick reflexes, though, as Baekhyun also did the same. There was a light touch, resulting in a slight startle as both of them looked up each other at the same time, staring straight into each other’s eyes. This started the cycle and showed Chanyeol an accidental preview. One he never asked for.

 

Oh no.

 

He snapped after a full minute, shaking his head furiously in an attempt to forget, as the first tear fell.

 

Andante.

 

Before he knew it, Baekhyun had already left. He turned and looked for the boy in attempt to catch him, only to see Baekhyun’s figure retreating behind the door. Unconsciously, his feet started moving on its own, and before he knew it, he was following Baekhyun outside.

 

Jongin noticed him leaving, and immediately bolted up from his seat to follow the professor.

 

Chanyeol was confused. He knew his actions were uncalled for, but he couldn’t seem to stop. He can only keep on walking and walking and walking, eyes fixed on Baekhyun’s petit back. Jongin caught up to him, grabbing his arm. “Hey! Where are you going?”Jongin received no response, and thus he went ahead and followed Chanyeol’s line of sight. “Are you following him?”

 

“Ssh.”

 

“Why are you following him—“ Jongin didn’t get to finish his question when he suddenly tripped over a rock and the cake on his hand ended up flying away towards…

 

Splash!

 

Chanyeol and Jongin stopped in unison, both as shocked as the other.

 

Baekhyun turned around to face them, with his uniform covered in icing. “Um…”

 

“Oh my God…” Jongin started. “I am so so sorry!” He added as he walked towards Baekhyun. He helplessly wiped the icing off and then it off from this thumb.

 

Chanyeol’s attention was elsewhere. There was something strangely endearing about the boy’s eyes but he couldn’t pinpoint what exactly it made him feel. There was a certain tenderness behind it that Chanyeol particularly liked. He felt calm, yet at the same time, he had never felt more alive.

 

Baekhyun’s laugh echoed like music around him, snapping him out of his daze. “It’s fine.”

 

“Let me wash your coat.” Jongin insisted.

 

“No, it’s really okay. I actually gotta go. My brother’s waiting for me.”

 

“Ah!” Jongin exclaimed once he spotted Baekhyun’s uniform under the stained coat. “Same school! How convenient!”

 

Jongin offered his coat afterwards, in which Baekhyun politely rejected, only for Jongin to insist. When they got to the waiting area, much to everyone’s surprise, Baekhyun’s brother, Sehun, turned out to be Jongin’s teammate from middle school. Jongin quickly explained the situation to him as soon as he saw Sehun’s annoyed face, and the expression on Sehun’s face didn’t change until it quickly dissipated when he recognized one of his teachers, Park Chanyeol.

 

--

 

Chanyeol was once again at loss. He stared at his empty desk. School had just started so there hadn’t been any work piled up yet. He was the only one left in the faculty room at lunch break. Chanyeol couldn’t seem to get his mind out of the gutter ever since the incident this morning. Since he and Jongin go to school by car, they weren’t able to ride with Baekhyun and Sehun, although Jongin insisted, once again, for Baekhyun to take his coat instead.

 

And now that all of them were where they are supposed to be, Chanyeol couldn’t help but wonder how fate would play his part. He knew nothing about the boy, his name or what year he was in--the small details that his ability couldn’t provide. He only sees images, but not details.

 

That’s why the mere thought of how and when scared him.

 

A noise distracted him and he turned his head towards the door. His colleague and friend, Luhan, walked inside, with a distinct smile Chanyeol knew too well. “Hey,” Luhan greeted. Chanyeol merely nodded his head in response. “So, Minah called, said she wasn’t feeling well and couldn’t make it to her class. The director told me to relay to you that you’re gonna sub for her class.”

 

“What?!”

 

“Well you’re the only one here whose schedule doesn’t overlap hers. So get on with it already. You don’t even have to do much since it’s still the first week of school.”

 

Chanyoeol sighed in defeat. “Fine, I got it.”

 

“Here,” Luhan said, handing him the class attendance sheet fastened on a folder. “The subject is Literature.”

 

--

 

Chanyeol can perfectly remember how much headaches Literature had given him back when he was still a student. Saying it wasn’t his forte may even be an understatement. It’s like Literature actually hated him. It talks about superficial things and nonsensical metaphors, ideas that are out-of-hand, misconceptions about love and how it affects human nature and rationality--it was all just a mess of deviances that Chanyeol couldn’t grasp the concept of. It puts science and physics to shame.

 

He shook his head as he approached the classroom, trying to clear his mind of those unfortunate events from the past. When he entered the room, the students greeted him accordingly.

 

He looked around the room as he picked up the attendance sheet, and froze as soon as he spotted the last person he wanted to see today (or the first person he was expecting to see today, truthfully)--Byun Baekhyun, seated at the very last row right beside the window. He was looking outside, his attention elsewhere, until he noticed someone’s gaze on him and turned to the front. Their eyes met then. It surprised Chanyeol but Baekhyun smiled at him softly, to which he politely returned before moving on with the attendance.

 

It was normal. Baekhyun was very quiet, it was almost like he wasn’t there, but Chanyeol always saw him. Always, because he can’t help but steal glances of the smaller boy from time to time.

 

Chanyeol was collecting his things, taking his time to make sure that everyone already left for their next class, when a familiar high-pitched voice called out on him. “Professor Park!”

 

Chanyeol looked up at Baekhyun smiling brightly down at him. “Hi.” he said.

 

“Wow, so you’re our new teacher?”

 

“No, I’m just subbing for today.”

 

“Aw, that’s too bad. I was looking forward to it, you know, Professor.”

 

Chanyeol couldn’t help but laugh. “You can just call me Chanyeol.”

 

“But I can’t. You’re a teacher.” Baekhyun replied, eyebrows slightly furrowed.

 

“Yeah but you can call me Chanyeol when it’s just the two of us.”

 

“Why?”

 

Why exactly? Maybe he wanted to know how Baekhyun pronounces his name.

 

“Well, you could say I’m still not used to being called Professor.”

 

Baekhyun tilted his head, thinking, before finally nodding. “Alright then, Chanyeol.”

 

Okay, so he does like the way Baekhyun pronounces his name. “Aren’t you going to your next class?”

 

“No, I don’t have P.E.” Baekhyun replied. “So I’ll just hang around here with you until lunch break.”

 

Chanyeol looks up. “And what made you think I don’t have a class after this?”

 

“Because you’re still here.” Baekhyun said with a cheeky smile, making Chanyeol wonder once again why he loved looking at his face. Loved. Chanyeol was cringing in his head at how appropriate this is starting to become. Baekhyun had a very gorgeous smile. For a guy. It was very endearing.

 

So just like that, swept off his feet, Chanyeol ended up staying. (He actually had a class after.)

 

“So, you’re Jongin’s brother?” Baekhyun asked while pulling a chair towards the teacher’s table.

 

“Half-brother.” Chanyeol corrected. “Just the usual father remarrying kind of stuff.” Baekhyun nodded. “How about you? You and Sehun don’t have the same surname so I was as surprised as Jongin.”

 

“He’s actually my cousin. We took him in when he was 8 after his parents died in a car crash. There were a lot of feuds at his mother’s side so my dad volunteered to take him instead. He didn’t want to put him through something difficult after losing his parents.”

 

“That’s admirable.”

 

“Yeah. I’m glad we have him.” Baekhyun said, smiling. “I’m really happy knowing he has great friends.”

 

“Oh? You didn’t think he had friends?”

 

“Well, ever since last year he’s been coming home early just for me so it made me worried that he might not be playing around with his friends as much. But he wouldn’t listen to me.”

 

Last year. “You missed school last year, right?”

 

“For two years, actually.” Baekhyun said. “Just some health problems. My parents are very overprotective and paranoid so...it ended up like that.”

 

“Well, that’s what parents do.”

 

“Ah, so grown-up.”

 

“I’m only 4 years older than you, you know.”

 

“But I still am a sophomore.” Baekhyun really has this obvious mischievous look, like he wasn’t afraid of anything, like he could disappear any time now. Chanyeol noticed him staring at something outside the classroom. When he turned to check, there were a group of students laughing and gossiping outside.

 

Ah, Chanyeol knew, he probably doesn’t have friends given he’d missed school for 2 years. “You should go and make some friends.”

 

Baekhyun turned to him then, startled at his remark. “No, that’s fine.” Chanyeol raised his eyebrows at his response and Baekhyun scoffed. “I don’t mind. The only reason why people want other people in their life is so that someone will remember them when they die. I’m fine with the few people fate has given me.”

 

It really is frightening, Chanyeol thought. Somehow, Baekhyun seemed unreachable.

 

--

 

Chanyeol was on his way back to the faculty room when an unfamiliar yet beautiful melody slowly danced into his ears and then around him, echoing everywhere. He could even imagine music notes floating around, bouncing happily. It was unusual for anyone to stay behind in this area of the building this late. The hallway and classrooms were already empty. Before he knew it, his curiously had led him in front of the music room, looking directly inside through the glass windows.

 

And there he felt himself slowly getting in into the melody, it was as if everything around him was disappearing, the ground beneath his feet crumbling, and that he’s standing on clouds, getting swept into the music, slowly, slowly, falling. And then he saw the sun rays reflecting so beautifully behind that familiar brunet head.

 

Chanyeol wondered to himself what goes through Baekhyun’s mind as his beautiful fingers grace the piano keys, what image does he have in mind, how beautiful could he possibly see the world as it is? Further and further, he gets into this unending obsession towards how life is like in Byun Baekhyun’s eyes.

 

And those eyes, right now, are only looking at him. “Professor Park!” The call immediately snapped Chanyeol back into reality, realizing a bit late that the melody has stopped playing. He saw Baekhyun walking towards him and stopping in front of the window. He slid the glass window open and leaned forward, with his arms supporting his weight. “Are you going home now?”

 

“Yeah,” Chanyeol answered, albeit still distracted with his thoughts. “I thought I told you to call me Chanyeol when it’s just the two of us?”

 

“Sorry, it slipped.” Baekhyun said, giggling cutely. “Are you gonna punish me, professor?”

 

Chanyeol paused, surprised, but mostly flustered. “Uh--”

 

“I’m joking!” Baekhyun chuckled. “You’re too serious. It’s not good to have wrinkles at such a young age.”

 

“Cheeky, aren’t we?” Chanyeol said, unable to resist pinching Baekhyun’s cheeks. Baekhyun crunched his nose and laughed, and it was easily the cutest thing Chanyeol has ever seen. Ever. Like a puppy. “And how about you? Kids should be at home already at this hour.”

 

“I’m not a kid.” Baekhyun argued. “Also, I’m waiting for Sehun to finish club activities so we can go home together.”

 

“Ah, basketball right? Jongin is in the same club. We usually go home together too.”

 

“Then,” Baekhyun started, smiling. “Shall we wait for them together, Chanyeol?”

 

Somehow, Chanyeol thought Baekhyun is doing something to him on purpose, but sometimes he just felt like this must how students act nowadays. Interesting. “Well, I still have to collect my things from the faculty.”

 

“I’ll come with!” As soon as Baekhyun made the declaration by himself, he ran to grab his bag and not a minute later, he was already walking out of the door.

 

There was no way Chanyeol could actually refuse him anyway. “I didn’t know you can play the piano.” Chanyeol said as they started walking.

 

“That’s understandable since we just met recently.” Baekhyun replied. “I started when I was five, I think? Both my parents are musically inclined, well, my mother mostly. My dad said that’s why he fell in love with her. Because his life has been like a musical ever since.”

 

“That’s sweet.”

 

Baekhyun smiled. “I wonder if I can make someone feel that way someday.”

 

Chanyeol stared at him. The sunset outside made the smaller look like he was somehow glowing. “I’m sure you can.” He said, smiling, with that image burned in his mind.

 

When they arrived at the faculty room, it was already empty. Baekhyun welcomed himself inside, craning his neck here and there as if he was on a tour.

 

“Don’t touch anything.” Chanyeol said as he made his way to his desk.

 

“I won’t!” Baekhyun assured as he grabbed one of the teachers’ picture frames.

 

Chanyeol started organizing the papers he collected earlier for the club applications on his table. It seemed that most of the students still didn’t know what club they wanted. He’ll need to talk to them so he can sort it out immediately. Now, he just needs to create a schedule for himself so he can entertain those students. It seems this school year will be busy for him, but he knew exactly just how this school year was going to go for him.

 

His hands stopped. He was suddenly reminded of what was about to come. Flashbacks of those sixty seconds started springing unwelcomed in his mind, albeit the memories were vague, they were incontestable.

 

“So this is your desk.”

 

Chanyeol paused, his thoughts interrupted, and he looked up from his seat to see Baekhyun looking down at him through the divider. Baekhyun seemed to have noticed his facial expression. “Why so serious, professor?”

 

Chanyeol shook his head. “No, sorry, I was just thinking of some things. Don’t worry, I’ll be done in a minute.” He immediately resumed what he was doing, missing Baekhyun’s worried pout.

 

The sun was already gone by the time they got out of the faculty room. Chanyeol hadn’t realized until now that club activities actually ended this late since he’s busy doing his work most of the time. When they arrived at the gymnasium, Sehun and Jongin were already outside, sitting on the stairs and munching on some ice cream.

 

They perked up when they spotted the two, with Jongin asking, “What took you so long?” and Sehun’s “Why are you together?” at the same time.

 

Baekhyun tilted his head at Sehun. “Shall we go?” Sehun immediately grabbed his bag.

 

“Oh, you’re going?” Chanyeol asked.

 

“Yeah. We still need to catch the bus.”

 

“Ah. I see. Well, we’re going this way since our car is parked...there.” He said and pointed at the car behind them. Oh.

 

“Okay, see you tomorrow, Professor.” Baekhyun said, smiling softly.

 

“S-see you tomorrow.” Chanyeol replied, almost stuttering. What was he doing anyway?

 

Jongin carefully watched Chanyeol’s expression. He looked like a kicked puppy. He could actually see Chanyeol’s ears drooping. He rolled his eyes and sighed. “Unless,” He started, loudly with enunciation, catching Sehun and Baekhyun’s attention. “You want to ride with us? We can drive you home.”

 

Baekhyun and Sehun blinked in surprise, not sure how to take that offer, Chanyeol even more.

 

“I mean, we have a car and we pass by your house on the way home. It’s the most practical thing to do.” Jongin said, shrugging.

 

“Is that fine, Professor?” Baekhyun asked out of concern as he turned his gaze to Chanyeol.

 

Why wouldn’t it be? Chanyeol shook his head. “Uh yeah, sure. I mean, I think that’s the most responsible thing I can do to my students right now. Come on. We’ll drive you home.”

 

“Then we’ll gladly accept!” Baekhyun declared, and grabbed Sehun’s hand. “Come on, Hun.”

 

Jongin snickered. “Yes, Hun, hurry up, Hun.” He teased while walking towards the other door of the car.

 

“Stop it.” Sehun snapped as Baekhyun and he moved to sit at the back, while Jongin sat beside the driver’s seat.

 

Jongin kept teasing Sehun with his nickname tremendously, even after Chanyeol started driving, that Sehun eventually resorted to threatening him with spilling his innuendos to Chanyeol. Jongin didn’t care though. He pretty much never hid anything from his brother, which resulted in Sehun sulking. Baekhyun was very entertained.

 

“Hyung, I told you not to call me by my nickname when we’re not at home.” Baekhyun only chuckled. He found his adoptive brother impossibly cute even when he turned out to be a 180cm french fry.

 

“Oh come on Sehun, it’s just us.” Jongin singsonged.

 

“Us? Who’s us?”

 

“Us.” Jongin said while pointing his fingers to him and Chanyeol.

 

“He’s a teacher!”

 

Baekhyun lightly slapped Sehun’s arm. “Don’t be like that.”

 

Chanyeol cleared his throat. “I’m not that old you know.”

 

“Everybody knows that,” Sehun groaned. “You’re a genius who graduated Med School two years in advance and turned down a thousand offers from different hospitals and NASA just to be a professor.”

 

The topic at hand quickly shifted as Jongin started teasing him again. Kids these days really have no self-control, Chanyeol thought, only to find himself stealing glances at Baekhyun through the mirror, who was looking outside the window. He would bite his lip occasionally, a habit Chanyeol found endearing. After a few more stolen glances, Baekhyun finally caught his gaze when he turned his head. Chanyeol was surprised. “Uh--your house is quite far, isn’t it?” He quickly altered, almost stuttering.

 

Baekhyun looked at him in confusion. “Don’t you pass by our house on your way home?”

 

They don’t, actually.

 

“Uh, yeah, sorry, I was pretty distracted.”

 

Jongin subtly shook his head noticing.

 

After a few more blocks, they finally reached Baekhyun and Sehun’s house. It was everything Chanyeol imagined it to be or even better. He imagined Baekhyun living in a simple yet lively neighborhood. He imagined their house had orchids outside and a small flower garden. It was a place befitting of someone like Baekhyun.

 

A small creature barking suddenly came charging towards the fence once Baekhyun and Sehun got out of the car. Baekhyun went to pick the dog up while Sehun went to collect .

 

“Hello~” Baekhyun singsonged, brushing his dog’s head. “This is Jon Snow, by the way. He’s a 4-month-old Husky.”

 

“You named your dog after a Game of Thrones character?”

 

“Why not?”

 

Jongin only nodded in agreement.

 

Baekhyun let Chanyeol and Jongin play with husky for a while before Sehun finally told him to come inside. They both said their gratitudes before Chanyeol finally drove away and Baekhyun waved goodbye.

 

From then on, the four of them started going home together, even though there wasn’t really any sort of verbal agreement.

 

--

 

Chanyeol started seeing Baekhyun more often, mainly because Baekhyun was usually alone when they met. It worried him that maybe Baekhyun wasn’t getting along with his classmates that well. But then he’s reminded that during his classes, he sometimes had small chats with them. Eventually, he understood that Baekhyun was the type who liked to keep some time to himself. They were somewhat the same. And people like them usually find themselves in another’s company because no one is imposing himself on the other.

 

They had a lot in common, more than what Chanyeol had perceived initially. Music was one of them. The same can be said with science and a part with traveling. Their conversations just evolve into something greater that they sometimes forget where they are and their respective differences.

 

Chanyeol liked talking to Baekhyun. He loved hearing Baekhyun’s opinions and stories, and just about anything. He was smart and insightful, and Chanyeol loved the way Baekhyun perceived the world and its beauty. If you asked a normal person to look at the night sky, they’d say the stars are beautiful. But if you asked Baekhyun, he’d point out how those stars are in fact, all dead and that death doesn’t always have to be perceived with such ugliness. Afterlife can also be beautiful, just like the night sky.

 

“Everything has beauty in it.” Baekhyun once whispered during one of their conversations. Chanyeol doesn’t remember what they talked about that day, but this he can perfectly remember, because that’s when he realized just how carefully God crafted imperfections into this beautiful mess of an entity sitting beside him.

 

“A~nd, the end?”

 

Chanyeol blinked, moving his chair backwards when his colleague, Luhan’s face suddenly zoomed into his sight. “What do you want?”

 

Luhan stared at him. “You’ve been distracted lately.”

 

“What?”

 

“You always space out in the middle of your work. It’s as if you’re in a perfectly different world doing God-knows-what in your head.” Luhan said while snatching the apple on Chanyeol’s desk and taking a bite. “I’m just worried about your well-being.”

 

“Just so you know, that’s a 2-week old apple.”

 

Luhan immediately spit it out. “er!”

 

“Also, you don’t need to concern yourself so much about me, I can handle things on my own.”

 

“Then can you entertain your student outside now?”

 

“Huh?” Chanyeol perked up from his seat to see. It was Baekhyun.

 

“He’s been there since forever and I’ve been calling you since forever so--” Chanyeol ignored Luhan and scurried out of the faculty room. “Well that’s rude.” Luhan murmured.

 

“Baekhyun!”

 

Baekhyun looked up, smiling as Chanyeol walked towards him. “Hey, professor!”

 

“What are you doing here?”

 

“Oh, I thought you’d be coming out soon so I just...waited.” As Baekhyun said so, his eyes were distracted by the students running behind Chanyeol. He seems to have only realized just now that he might’ve stood there waiting for more than his intended five minutes.

 

“No, I mean, why are you here? You could’ve just waited at the library or something.”

 

Baekhyun scratched his neck. “Uh, well, I actually have limited options right now.”

 

Chanyeol realized after a few seconds. It’s already exam week, so students linger at school later than usual, copying notes, borrowing books and the likes.

 

“I won’t be done in another half hour. Maybe you can wait at the music room? It’s closer here.”

 

Baekhyun glanced at the music room in confusion. “But it’s closed since--” Right then, Chanyeol dangled a pair of keys in front of him.

 

“Don’t underestimate your teacher.” Chanyeol was usually the one to close the music room.

 

“Here you go.” Chanyeol said, dropping the keys on Baekhyun’s palm. “Don’t let anyone else inside, okay? I’m making an exception because you’re special.” He didn’t actually mean to phrase it that way but he couldn’t think of any other way to say it.

 

And Baekhyun’s reaction made it so much more embarrassing. “T-Thanks, professor.” He mumbled. His ears were red. If this was a normal teacher to student interaction, he’d find this student utterly cute, but his kind of fondness towards Baekhyun is something different and much more delicate.

 

--

 

Expectedly, Chanyeol finished his work faster than he usually does. Luhan had already gone home and there were only four other teachers left at this hour. He quickly collected his things and then said his goodbyes to the other teachers.

 

A few distance from the music room, he noticed that the music room looked rather empty. He approached the room slowly, his eyebrows crooked, wondering in his head if Baekhyun might’ve decided to go home instead, until he heard a faint melody, a familiar voice singing an unfamiliar song somewhere.

 

He walked closer to the window and leaned slightly forward. He spotted the familiar brunet head on the floor. He was about to open the door when he the song grew louder. He stopped his hand He’s singing? He thought. He already knew Baekhyun could play the piano, but for him to actually possess such a beautiful voice--somehow he knew it wasn’t impossible, but it caught him off-guard anyway.

 

He stood outside, leaning against the door for almost a minute until he spotted the teachers coming out of the faculty room. He was then forced to run inside the room, unfortunately interrupting Baekhyun’s private acoustic session.

 

“Professor Park!” Baekhyun exclaimed.

 

“Hey. No don’t stand up.” Chanyeol said while positioning himself beside Baekhyun. “I thought you’d gone home already.”

 

“Of course not.” Silence suddenly took over when the teachers passed by outside, chattering loudly. “Are we hiding?” Baekhyun asked in a whisper.

 

“I don’t know,” Chanyeol replied in the same manner. It seemed like the right thing to do...somehow.

 

They stayed like that until the noise finally cleared up.

 

“Are they gone?”

 

Chanyeol perked up a little to peek. “Yeah,” he says at the sight of an empty hallway. When he sat back down, he heard Baekhyun stifle a laugh that he ended up bursting into one with Baekhyun following. “That...That was--”

 

“Interesting.” Baekhyun interrupts while laughing still.

 

“I was about to say ridiculous, but interesting will do.” Chanyeol leaned his head against the wall, taking a deep breath. “You have a nice voice.” Silence engulfed them once again.

 

 “You heard?” Baekhyun finally replied, gasping.

 

“You were pretty loud.” Chanyeol said with a chuckle. Baekhyun groaned then and tried to hide his embarrassment. “Why? What’s the matter? It was a compliment.”

 

“It’s not that!”

 

“Then what?” For some reason, Chanyeol couldn’t stop grinning as he watched Baekhyun try to hide his apparent shyness. “Come on, tell me.”

 

“Alright, fine fine, I’ll tell you.” Baekhyun finally succumbed. “But promise me you won’t laugh at me or think I’m lame!”

 

Chanyeol shrugged his shoulders. “That depends.” Baekhyun pouted at him and he almost burst into laughter, but decided against it. “Okay, okay, I won’t. I promise.”

 

Baekhyun took a deep breath, almost worrying Chanyeol. “I was going to surprise you at the school festival.”

 

Chanyeol paused. “Surprise me?”

 

Baekhyun quickly looked down and covered his ears. “I can hear you laughing already!”

 

“Hey, I’m not laughing.” Chanyeol reassured as he grabbed both of Baekhyun’s hands to pull them away from his ears as Baekhyun resisted. He wasn’t, sure, but he couldn’t wipe off the grin on his face. He just couldn’t help it. Eventually, Baekhyun lost to Chanyeol’s strength and he looked up at him shyly. “See? I’m not laughing.”

 

“Ugh, it doesn’t even matter anymore. Even I think it’s lame.”

 

“It’s not lame. I think it’s cute.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah, I mean I don’t really have that much experience with surprises, but I think it’s cute.”

 

“I like ‘em.” Baekhyun said, placing his head on his arms above his knees. “I like surprises. I like the process and the waiting and the excitement...it makes the memory much more special for both parties, don’t you think so?”

 

This was why Chanyeol liked talking to him. The world always seemed so beautiful when he talked about it. “Then surprise me at the school festival.”

 

Baekhyun snorted. “I didn’t even expect that I’m gonna sing at the festival. I was surprised first.”

 

“So how’d you end up performing then?”

 

“Well...” Baekhyun clicked his tongue. “Sehun kinda mentioned to Jongin that I liked to sing as a hobby and that information was relayed to Jongin’s friends and apparently Jongin has a lot of friends.”

 

Chanyeol laughed this time. “You have the worst luck.”

 

Baekhyun stifled his laughter as he continued. “Yeah so when the class was discussing about what to do for the festival, no one was raising their hands and giving suggestions, so the president went ‘oh I heard Baekhyun can sing’ and they all pushed me to sing in front and well, in our home we value confidence.”

 

“Oh do you now?” Chanyeol teased.

 

Baekhyun playfully slapped Chanyeol’s arm while laughing. “My mom always told me, who else is gonna believe in your talent if not yourself? I think I interpreted that perfectly. So, I don’t think I’m in the wrong here!”

 

“No, no, I get it, I get it!” Chanyeol said, lifting his hands as if surrendering. “It suits you. It’s totally not out-of-character. Confident,” he continued as he counted with his fingers. “Insightful, talented...sparkly.”

 

Baekhyun snorted out of ridicule. “Sparkly?! Am I a dog?”

 

“Yeah, unless you can give me a better adjective then all you’re gonna get is sparkly.”

 

Baekhyun thought for a moment. “Candescent?”

 

“Oh, candescent? Really?”

 

“Whaaaat?”

 

“Nah, we’re sticking with sparkly.”

 

“That’s unfair!” Baekhyun tried to protest, but only ended up laughing loudly in defeat. Chanyeol couldn’t hold his own. Their joyous little conversation was then interrupted by the last school chime.

 

“We should head to the gym soon.” Chanyeol said. Baekhyun nodded before standing up, grabbing his bag in the process. He passed the key to Chanyeol and they leave the music room together.

 

--

 

The sun was almost setting when they walked out of the building. It seemed to be a recurring sight to Chanyeol now. He doesn’t even remember seeing the sunset this much before he met Baekhyun.

 

“I wonder if they’re done practicing.”

 

Chanyeol glanced at Baekhyun. “Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask, why don’t you just wait at the gymnasium for Sehun instead of wandering around the campus? Wouldn’t that be easier?”

 

“Yeah, except Sehun doesn’t really want me there.” Baekhyun noticed the puzzled look on Chanyeol’s face. “Wait, let me rephrase that. He’ll feel uncomfortable with me watching. He’s shy I guess?”

 

“You’re okay with that?”

 

“I can’t really argue with him about that.”

 

“You spoil him a lot, don’t you?”

 

“Well, if I won’t, who will?” Baekhyun replid with a smile. It was sad but genuine.

 

“That’s why he grew up to be so stubborn.” Chanyeol commented in attempt to lighten up the mood. “Especially with Jongin with him all the time.”

 

“What about Jongin?” Baekhyun asked as he jumped on the knee-level railings guarding the bushes. Chanyeol held his hand in reflex, making sure he wouldn’t fall over by accident.

 

“Well, Jongin is like an enabler. He gives you opportunities to display your habits without a problem, even though it’s unnecessary and even if those habits are bad. He’s indifferent towards those things.”

 

“Uh-huh,” Baekhyun nodded, albeit slightly confused. “Is that a bad thing?”

 

“It depends.”

 

“So if Jongin is an enabler,” Baekhyun started as he jumped off the railings. “Then that means he enables you as well, right?”

 

“Huh, I haven’t really thought about that.”

 

“So, what’s Park Chanyeol like?” Baekhyun asked with a grin on his face. “Not Professor Park, but Park Chanyeol, the real Park Chanyeol.”

 

“That’s hard. I might consider putting that on a test.”

 

“Come on. Seriously!” Baekhyun whined, but he ended up laughing anyway.

 

They passed by the park where students usually wait for their respective guardians to pick them up or just kill time. Some students greeted Chanyeol when they spotted, and he greeted back. They barely made it to the other side of the road when Baekhyun started pestering him again. Chanyeol laughed at his persistence. He sees now that Baekhyun is still young after all, sometimes he can also act like a child.

 

“Park Chanyeol huh...” Chanyeol starts with a quick caress on his chin. “Well, for starters, he’s pretty good-looking.” Baekhyun snorted. “Yeah? No?” Baekhyun ended up nodding in agreement anyway. “He was pretty popular with the ladies.”

 

“I’m sure he was.”

 

“He was also a varsity player in Basketball. He’s a genius. He skipped two grades.” Baekhyun rolled his eyes playfully. “And he plays the guitar.”

 

Baekhyun’s face immediately lit up. “The guitar? Really?!”

 

They were only a few meters from the gymnasium now. “Bet you didn’t know about that.”

 

“Ah, the element of surprise.”

 

Chanyeol snickered. “What about Baekhyun then?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“What’s Byun Baekhyun like? The real Byun Baekhyun?” Chanyeol quoted.

 

Baekhyun opened his mouth to respond, only to be interrupted by Sehun’s call. The two turned to the side where Jongin and Sehun were approaching.

 

Baekhyun turned back to Chanyeol and smiled. “Next time then.” Chanyeol didn’t have the chance to respond as Baekhyun walked towards Sehun.

 

--

 

The question didn’t wander around for a long time when Baekhyun visited the faculty room out of the blue. It was around break time and Chanyeol and Baekhyun don’t really meet in such circumstance when the exams are just around the corner.

 

“Tutor? Sehun?”

 

Baekhyun bit his lip. He seemed to have contemplated a lot about it and was still contemplating. “Well, I used to help him study but...I got left behind and now we’re in the same grade so I won’t be much of a help either.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Also, I asked Jongin,” Baekhyun added. “And he said you would be very happy to help us.”

 

Chanyeol chuckled at the selfish remark. “Cheeky, aren’t we?” He said while pinching his student’s cheek.

 

“I’m just making use of my special privileges,” Baekhyun told him, grinning from ear to ear. “And irresistible charm.”

 

“You found yourself a good target, didn’t you?”

 

“Sure, I’ll flatter you professor.” Baekhyun said in a joking manner.

 

“Well, it doesn’t pose a problem. Since I usually help Jongin with his studies, it’s okay if you two want to join as well.”

 

Baekhyun almost leaped in joy. “Yey! Thank you, professor! You’re the best! You’ll live a life full of prosperity!” He announced while making gestures with his hands and arms extended in the air.

 

“Alright, alright,” Chanyeol replied, stifling his laugh. “Now go back to class, cheeky kid. Lunch break is almost over.”

 

Baekhyun made a run for it, but stopped halfway to look back and flash that bright and beautiful smile at Chanyeol while waving his hand. It took Chanyeol by surprise and before he could respond, Baekhyun already had his back on him as he continued running. Traces of that moment lingered in the air as the wind paced around him. It was utterly and undeniably ravishing, how only a few seconds could take his breath away.

 

--

 

Standing in front of Baekhyun and Sehun’s home, it was only then that Chanyeol realized they’ve been here numerous times but were never invited in. Looking back, it wasn’t like there were any opportunities for those types of formalities either. Jongin rang the doorbell and after a few seconds, a familiar voice echoed from behind the door, making Chanyeol’s heart skip a beat. The door opened slowly and Baekhyun greeted them with a bright smile. And expectedly, Jon Snow came dashing towards the terrace barking after spotting the strangers.

 

“Such a warm welcome.” Jongin said, making Baekhyun laugh. Baekhyun bent down and picked up Jon Snow in his arms, in which the husky immediately calmed down.

 

“Come on in.” Baekhyun said, tilting his head.

 

Jongin nodded and was about to walk in with Baekhyun yelling in the background for Sehun to come down, when he noticed Chanyeol spacing out beside him. He sighed. “Stare at your heart’s content, hyung.”

 

Chanyeol turned to him. “What? What did you say?”

 

Jongin shrugged his shoulders. “Nothing.” He replied as he walked in. Spacing out at the sight of Baekhyun in casual clothes--Chanyeol is actually too predictable. It made Jongin cry how Chanyeol had an IQ of a genius but the heart of a high schooler.

 

“Your parents here?”

 

“No. They’re both at work. They won’t be home until dinner.”

 

Chanyeol immediately went to follow Jongin who was trailing behind Baekyun towards the kitchen, but as soon as he passed by the entrance to the living room, he stopped. It was spacious and clean, but what caught his interest were the framed album covers of bands and singers on the walls. It was everywhere, filling the whole four corners. There were even a few of them on the walls of the hallway. He walked inside to get a better view. On the wall adjacent to his position, different kinds of electric and acoustic guitars were hung beautifully. It was obvious how often they were used and how well they were taken care of. At the corner stood an organ piano. He can only imagine how Baekhyun’s family values music.

 

“Do you like it?”

 

Chanyeol almost jumped in surprised when Baekhyun suddenly spoke beside him. Baekhyun chuckled at his reaction and Chanyeol immediately composed himself. “It’s nice.”

 

“They’re the singers and bands my parents really like,” Baekhyun said, circling around him and pulling him inside. “As you can see, they really have a wide range of genre.”

 

It’s true. Chanyeol noticed how randomly these were put together. From singers like New Order, to Blondie, to the Outfield, even Queen. “Which one’s their favorite?”

 

“They don’t have favorite singers,” Baekhyun answered. “But they do have a favorite song. Let’s see...” He looked around until he finally spotted what he was looking for. “There!” He exclaimed as he skipped towards a particular framed album. “Kenny Rogers. Islands in the Stream. They sang it a lot when we were kids.”

 

“How about yours?”

 

Baekhyun gave him a look. “My favorite song?” He started to speak, but was unfortunately interrupted by Sehun who called them by the entryway.

 

“Are you gonna keep touring him around the living room or what?”

 

“Stop speaking like that towards your teacher.” Baekhyun chided while chuckling. Sehun stared at Chanyeol for a few seconds before murmuring a ‘sorry’ with his usual poker face, and made his way to the stairs. Baekhyun sighed and turned back to Chanyeol. “I heard them talking about playing basketball later so I think they want to finish as early as possible.”

 

“Basketball?” Chanyeol asked to clarify as he followed Baekhyun to the stairs.

 

“Yeah, we have a court in the backyard.” Baekhyun noticed Chanyeol’s meek response. “You just thought about joining them, didn’t you?”

 

“Was it that obvious?”

 

“It was written all over your face.”

 

Chanyeol clicked his tongue in spite. “Damn it. I never can control the letters on my face.”

 

“How unfortunate.” Baekhyun said, pouting.

 

“I know. I tried though.”

 

Baekhyun’s laugh echoed around him as they made their way to the second floor. Baekhyun mentioned that they’ll be using his room since Sehun’s room was too messy. And although that piece of information is trivial for others, Chanyeol couldn’t help but ponder about it and he felt a weird sense of excitement.

 

When they arrived, Sehun and Jongin were already inside the room, comfortably sitting on the floor. There was a small table in the middle, already filled with snacks and unnecessary magazines. Baekhyun sighed at the sight of how messy his room had become in such a short time.

 

Chanyeol’s attention though was immediately drawn towards the surroundings like a magnet. Baekhyun’s room was simple, with enough space and decoration. There were polaroids pinned on the wall along with random cut magazine pages. His bed had enough amount of plushies, which Chanyeol found adorable. A shelf full of books and CDs took the most space in the room. Baekyun scolding Sehun in the background distracted him and Chanyeol immediately went to find a spot for himself before Baekhyun noticed him being overly curious about his room.

 

And after a few more rounds of bickering and scolding, Chanyeol finally took the initiative to start their study session.

 

--

 

Two hours passed before Sehun finally started complaining about needing a break. Chanyeol sighed and ended up agreeing, seeing how Sehun was probably not gonna stop whining until he got what he wanted. He and Jongin quietly made their way downstairs, careful not to wake Baekhyun who fell into deep sleep not too long ago.

 

With the other two gone and the silence slowly filling the room, Chanyeol’s attention was fixated on the sleeping boy. Baekhyun looked so vulnerable, like every other human being when asleep, but Chanyeol felt a weird sense of protectiveness as he stared at his sleeping figure. Chanyeol sighed and rested his head on the table, staring at Baekhyun’s sleeping face. He could almost hear his breathing with the silence. Eventually his attention was shifted onto the smaller’s lips, and then his nose, and then his perfect eyelids and eyelashes and then his fringe that covered his forehead. Chanyeol suddenly felt an urge to brush Baekhyun’s fringe away so he could get a perfect picture of Baekhyun’s sleeping face but decided against it. He sat back up straight, trying to find a distraction.

 

He spotted a guitar leaning at the corner, beside Baekhyun’s study table. Chanyeol leaned forward to grab it, his long arms giving him an advantage, and carefully set it on his lap. He moved away from the table for more space and ended up facing the window with his back turned to the table. He strummed the guitar, the sound giving him a nostalgic feeling. He claimed he loves music but he has actually been neglecting it and now he felt guilty being in a household that valued music as much as humans value life.

 

After tuning the guitar, he continuously strummed with his fingers, at first just to get rid of that nostalgic feeling until eventually he started strumming to an old and familiar song. It was a simple song. He closed his eyes as he hummed to the tune, trying to remember the lyrics, as his fingers continue to dance. “...think about time..ah.” He murmured, stuttering to find the missing words, until he was eventually able fill in the missing lyrics. And so he started again, this time perfectly. “I think about life, and oh how it changes so fast,”

 

“And oh how it's so hard to last here waiting for something to give,”

 

“I think about time, a luxury so hard to find,”

 

“And I just can't figure out why I wasted it all here without you,”

 

He was never the type who expressed his feelings so openly and thus songs help him get those feelings out of his system. Although it was something to be thankful of, he felt a rather obvious pang in his chest along with the reminder of how painful this whole thing was going to be for him.

 

“But I'll be fine, and oh don't you worry,”

 

“Cause I'll be fine, see I'm in a hurry to be,”

 

“Gone away awhile,” Baekhyun slowly awakened behind him, blinking his eyes open to the unfamiliar tune. “Tell me all the things that I, I'll be missing here in this old life man cause I just don't know,” He stared at Chanyeol’s slightly slouched back and remained at rest as Chanyeol continued, unaware of his audience. “I think about you, and all the times that we shared,”

 

“And oh what a wonderful pair we made made it so far, here we go again,”

 

“I think about love, and oh what a beautiful song,” Baekhyun slowly closed his eyes, smiling “And oh how it need to be sung here, sing it so loud all the world can hear,” Baekhyun wondered as he listened, what could be in Chanyeol’s mind while softly singing those words. Something so beautiful can only be expressed by the ones aware of the feeling of being deprived of something as equally beautiful.

 

Baekhyun sat up straight as Chanyeol finished the song. He expected the taller to notice his presence but instead, he found Chanyeol staring out the window, in deep silence, as if he was reminded of something he has long forgotten, or of something that was taken away from him. Baekhyun couldn’t see his face but even from the back, he could see how sad he was.

 

What could be the reason?

 

As he pondered on the thought, he failed to notice Chanyeol turning to him, checking up on him. “You’re awake.”

 

“Hey,” Baekhyun said, smiling in delay.

 

“Sorry, did I wake you?”

 

“It’s not bad waking up to something like that.” As Baekhyun said so, he noticed Chanyeol turning red. “That was a nice performance.”

 

“I’m honored,” Chanyeol replied, playing along. “Sorry I took it without permission.”

 

“It’s okay. I think it’s lonely anyway.”

 

“Why?” Chanyeol asked, carefully placing the guitar back on its spot.

 

“I wanted to learn how to play the guitar so I bought one but ever since getting admitted to the hospital, I wasn’t able to get back on it.” Baekhyun explained, his disappointment apparent. “And that was 2 years ago.”

 

“As long as you don’t forget about it I think there isn’t much to feel guilty about.” Chanyeol reassured as he repositioned himself facing the table. “Nobody wants to be forgotten, after all.”

 

“You’re right. As expected from Professor Park.” Baekhyun teased.

 

Chanyeol gave him a look in which Baekhyun rebutted with a grin. Sehun and Jongin’s voices then echoed from outside and their attention both shifted towards the door as Sehun and Jongin entered with a bag of milkshakes and brownies.

 

“Oh, hyung, you’re awake.” Sehun said before sitting beside Baekhyun and taking out a strawberry-flavored milkshake for him. “Here.” Baekhyun mouthed his gratitude before piercing the straw on the cartoned beverage. Noise slowly filled up the room as random conversations sprouted one at a time.

 

--

 

Thanks to Chanyeol’s strict tutoring system and Jongin’s cooperation being used to it already, they managed to finish right on schedule even though Sehun nagged about being bored most of the time thus causing delays. Even so, as soon as Chanyeol closed the book, Sehun immediately dashed out the room. Before they knew it, he was already wearing his basketball shoes and dragged Jongin with him downstairs.

 

“Sorry for making you help.” Baekhyun said, holding a tray, while walking to the kitchen with Chanyeol behind him holding another tray.

 

“It’s fine. I’m an adult.” Chanyeol replied with a grin.

 

“I bet you really like saying that.” Baekhyun teased while carefully placing the tray down on the sink with Chanyeol following. He looked out the window when the noise distracted him. Sehun and Jongin seemed to be playing a shooting game with Jon Snow running around them. “You wanna join them?”

 

“Nah. I think I’ve used up all of my energy trying to get Sehun to memorize formulas.”

 

Baekhyun laughed at his response and Chanyeol swore if he was a computer, he could get rebooted at full power with the sound of that alone. The phone rang from the living room, interrupting that glorious moment. “If you’re hungry, grab anything you want from the fridge.” Baekhyun told him before skipping out of the kitchen.

 

Chanyeol, of course, took his word and walked towards the fridge. He grabbed the handle but stopped when he noticed the notes on the fridge. There were a lot. Some of them were reminders but most of them were Baekhyun’s eating schedules. He could tell just by looking at the timelines. He didn’t know if these were still being applied now given that Baekhyun looked fine, but it was still painful to see. The schedule was strict and Chanyeol would hate to think how much Baekhyun must had forced himself to follow it but it knowing was inevitable.

 

He heard Baekhyun walking back and immediately turned away from the fridge.

 

“Hey, so, I just got off the phone with my mom and they’ll be home in an hour. Are you sure you don’t want to stay for dinner? I mean as a thanks for tutoring us.”

 

“No it’s fine, really.”

 

“But--”

 

Chanyeol cut him off with a chuckle. “Don’t worry. I’m confident we’re still gonna have dinner together sometime at some place. Could be Sunday next week, who knows.”

 

Baekhyun stared at him and chuckled. “Are you asking me out on a date?”

 

Chanyeol shrugged. “Well, if you badly want a date then...”

 

Baekhyun then burst into laughter. “You actually pick up dates like this?”

 

“No. Just you.” Chanyeol said. “So, I’ll pick you up next Sunday at 10, maybe?”

 

“You really planned this carefully, didn’t you?”

 

Chanyeol shrugged. “Things just work out, you know?”

 

Baekhyun shook his head in disbelief before he was reminded of something. “But is it okay? I mean a student and a professor going on a date is kind of...”

 

“Come on. It’s a Sunday,” Chanyeol said with a grin. “I’m not a professor on Sundays.”

 

Baekhyun chuckled. “You should put that on a t-shirt.”

 

“Only if you’ll wear it.”

 

Baekhyun playfully hit his arm. “Stop it.”

 

“Could you be any more obvious?” It startled them both seeing Sehun by the door with Jongin grinning behind him but not so much as to feel ashamed about it. Jongin’s proud look kind of helped. “Please, not in the kitchen. It’s sacred.”

 

“Sorry, hun.” Baekhyun teased. “Need some water?”

 

“Sure.” Sehun caught the water bottle Baekhyun threw.

 

“Uh, we should be going,” Chanyeol announced, turning to Jongin. “You good?”

 

“Yeah, one sec.” Jongin said before gulping down a bottle of water.

 

Baekhyun walked them to the gate, with Sehun lagging behind them. On the other hand, Jongin made a beeline to their car, probably to cool down with the AC.

 

“So, next Sunday?” Chanyeol said, giving him an obvious charming look. “10 o’clock?”

 

Baekhyun chuckled. “You’re really pathetic, you know that?”

 

“I’m all yours.”

 

“Ugh,” Baekhyun sighed deeply. “Fine.” Chanyeol stared at him. “Next Sunday. 10 o’clock.”

 

Chanyeol winked at him before subtly skipping towards his car where Jongin was already waiting impatiently. Baekhyun watched him intently, not realizing that Sehun has taken the spot beside him, doing the same.

 

“You really like him, don’t you?” Sehun asked.

 

“He’s interesting.”

 

“You don’t have to lie to me.”

 

There was a short pause. “He’s interesting.” Baekhyun reiterated before walking back inside with a smile.

 

--

 

It felt as if time had skipped to Sunday, now that Baekhyun had come to the realization as he stood at their meeting place. They settled meeting at 10 o’clock but it’s still 9:30 AM. And no, Baekhyun was not excited or anything, it just so happened that he finished his chores early today. Yeah. Probably. Although, it is kind of embarrassing to arrive 30 minutes earlier than their supposed meeting time, but this could actually work to his advantage. He had time to at least calm his nerves.

 

“Baekhyun?”

 

Or not.

 

Baekhyun froze at that awfully familiar voice. He almost cursed when he turned around. Baekhyun would not openly admit it but Chanyeol was really handsome. Especially now that he’s dressed his age.

 

“How long have you been waiting?”

 

“Not long. I just happened to finish errands early today and I didn’t have anything else to do, so...”

 

Chanyeol clicked his tongue. “And I wanted to get here earlier.” They both laughed then, realizing they arrived at least thirty minutes earlier than the time they agreed on. Then what was the point of that?

 

Chanyeol cleared his throat and offered his arm. “Well then, let’s have fun, shall we?”

 

Baekhyun giggled before wrapping his arm around Chanyeol’s.

 

Most people, when going on dates, would either be in the cinemas or some fancy restaurant, but for a nerd of a professor and an introvert student, sitting on the floor at the corner of the public library with books was the definition of a date. They somehow ended up in this situation when they couldn’t decide where to go and discovered that they’re no different when it came to their inkling towards books.

 

They sat in silence, almost like they’d built an imaginary border around them. The silence though was very comfortable. They sat with their backs against each other. Chanyeol, in particular, liked the feeling of Baekhyun’s hair softly resting against his neck. And Baekhyun liked the warmth of Chanyeol’s back.

 

“Hey, why do you think this Herman Melville named this book Moby-?” Baekhyun asked after covering almost one-third of the book. Unlike Chanyeol who’s a science geek, Baekhyun like English literature.

 

“Isn’t it because of the whale? whale? whale?”

 

Baekhyun laughed at his lame attempt of a definition. “Not even! This book wasn’t written in 2015!”

 

“Actually, if you think about it, ual innuendos were already a thing back then.”

 

Baekhyun gave him a look, slightly craning his head. What?”

 

Chanyeol raised the cover of the book on his hand. “Dickens? Tolstoy?” Baekhyun burst in laughter again. “Hardy? Shakespeare?” He said while subtly shaking his hand after making a fist.

 

“Stop!” Baekhyun exclaimed in laughter as he turned to face Chanyeol, hitting him playfully. “Inappropriate!”

 

Chanyeol laughed with him, his body unconsciously turning towards Baekhyun.

 

Chanyeol remembered the text from the book he read earlier.

 

We believe that we can change the things around us in accordance with our desires—we believe it because otherwise we can see no favourable outcome. We do not think of the outcome which generally comes to pass and is also favourable: we do not succeed in changing things in accordance with our desires, but gradually our desires change.*

He looked back to his many attempts to try and change the course of this story and wondered when he stopped wanting to change it in fear of feeling the pain he had witnessed in that preview that started it all.

 

The situation that we hoped to change because it was intolerable becomes unimportant to us.*

Truly, because right now, at this moment, he realized that he wanted to see Baekhyun smile more than anything else in the world, until he’d gotten tired of it (which he never will, ever), until his 60 seconds came to an end.

 

“I wish I could read more books. That’s my dream. To listen to every song and to read every classic literature in the world.” Baekhyun said, sounding proud.

 

Chanyeol chuckled with subtle mockery. “Nobody can live long enough for a dream like that.”

 

“Yeah, but to quote Hemingway, isn’t it pretty to think so?” **

 

If Chanyeol had one wish, he’d wish for that dream to come true.

 

“I guess.”

 

--

 

They left the public library past noon, feeling the hunger. They went to a food chain across the street since the pouring rain left them with no choice. They didn’t even notice it had started to rain.

 

“Order anything you want. It’s on me.”

 

Baekhyun gave him a look and then sighed. “Chanyeol, I’m not a girl. I can pay for myself.”

 

“Sorry, that’s not what I meant.” Chanyeol said. “I wanted to treat you.”

 

“Well, if you wanted to treat me something then you shouldn’t have brought me to this...ty place.” The last part had to be whispered as there were barely any customers at sight. Chanyeol couldn’t agree more.

 

“Alright. Next time.” Chanyeol replied while chuckling. “This place is ty.” Baekhyun laughed before calling for the waiter.

 

Baekhyun ate like a baby, is what Chanyeol had observed. He stuffed his mouth with so much before chewing, making him look like a hamster, which is adorable. And then when he finally swallowed, more often than not, he would almost choke and immediately push water down his throat. Then he’d laughed it off. And then he’d stuff his mouth again.

 

“Stop staring. That’s rude.”

 

“Artwork is meant to be stared at.”

 

Baekhyun choked, but not because of the food this time. “Calm down, Shakespeare.”

 

“Well, thou art quaint. I don’t forswear.” *** Chanyeol said dramatically.

 

“Stop it.” Baekhyun said, laughing as he playfully kicked Chanyeol’s foot. “I don’t really like Shakespeare.”

 

Chanyeol raised his eyebrows. “Oh?”

 

“Shakespeare is pretty depressing.”

 

“Well, that’s new.” Chanyeol said curiously.

 

“Rome and Juliet, both committed suicide. Hamlet, talks to ghosts. Othello...I haven’t read it but I’m sure it’s pretty depressing too.” Chanyeol chuckled at his pretenses, but he’s interested to hear more. “The Tempest? Come on, a father and his daughter trapped in an island? How much more depressing can that be?”

 

“Fine, I’ll take your word for it. Then what is not depressing for you?” Baekhyun stared at Chanyeol, contemplating. “Come on, you brought this up.”

 

“You’ll laugh.”

 

“I won’t. I promise. I’ll bet this last piece of kimchi on it.” Baekhyun finally complied, murmuring his answer. “What?”

 

“I said Jane Eyre!”

 

A group of men suddenly burst into laughter behind them, distracting Baekhyun. When Baekhyun turned back to Chanyeol, the giant was looking away and covering his mouth with his hand. Baekhyun then snatched the last piece of kimchi and gulped it in. “Wha--”

 

“You laughed!”

 

Chanyeol thought of defending himself but after seeing Baekhyun’s mouth stuffed with kimchi looking like a hamster pouting angrily, he just burst out of laughter.

 

“How rude.” Baekhyun said, making Chanyeol laugh even harder. He doesn’t remember ever laughing this much before. Baekhyun himself couldn’t help but smile at how much Chanyeol was laughing. It made him happy, seeing him so carefree like this. Everytime he saw him in school, he always looked tense.

 

“It stopped raining.” Chanyeol suddenly said. “Should we go?”

 

Baekhyun nodded when he thought of the next place he wanted to go to.

 

--

 

Baekhyun never thought he’d get to walk at a time like this, a time where the pavements were cold and wet from the rain and the sky was covered with the sunset’s orange. Street lights were lighting up as they walked, eating the ice cream they bought earlier at the Clockworks Cafe.

 

“The workers really like you, don’t they?”

 

“I suppose. When I was hospitalized, Sehun would frequently buy sweets from the cafe whenever he visits me. I guess since they always see him, they became familiar with him, and Sehun would talk about me a lot.” That part Chanyeol knew very well.

 

“Come to think of it, you must’ve been really sick that you had to stay in the hospital for at least 2 years.”

 

Baekhyun bit his lip. “Actually, I got into a really serious accident.”

 

Chanyeol didn’t say anything--not yet--and waited for Baekhyun to continue himself, if he wanted. Of course he wanted to know what really happened but if Baekhyun didn’t want to talk about it then he wouldn’t stick his nose into it. However, right now, Baekhyun seemed really...troubled.

 

“How bad was it?” Chanyeol asked as a gentle push.

 

“Really, really bad,” Baekhyun said with a sigh. “It has only been two weeks since school started. I was a freshman so Sehun was still in middle school. That day, Sehun had a very important game, and I have never missed any of his games. But the homeroom teacher dismissed us late so I was rushing to make it to his game. I don’t really remember what happened exactly, but the police said a drunk driver collided with a truck, and the truck hit me. But because of the impact of the collision, the truck crashed into a construction site. They said the truck driver hit the brakes in time or I would’ve been completely crushed. But I was definitely thrown into the construction debris. And then, a metal rod got plunged into my chest. The EMTs said they thought I was dead for sure but I managed to make it into the operating room. The surgeon who operated on me said the rod only scraped my heart and was able to fix it. But then, after a few days, the doctors said my condition wasn’t improving. So, they kept me there to monitor my vitals and to do several more tests but they couldn’t find out why. My parents wanted to take me back home if they aren’t going to make me better, plus the expense would just keep growing.”

 

This time, Chanyeol couldn’t say anything. Even just hearing it sounded hard, how much more if he was able to witness it himself? Baekhyun must’ve been really exhausted both physically and emotionally.

 

“The doctor said I probably won’t have more than a year to live and my parents told him that’s all the more reason why I had to go home. So, of course, they made me drop out of school. Sehun wanted to drop out too but I scolded him, plus that would make my parents really sad. Surprisingly, a year has passed and I’m still alive. So I begged my parents to let me go back to school. And I’m still alive. I guess it all worked out for the best in the end.”

 

“You’re amazing.”

 

“Hardly.”

 

“Most people would’ve given up already. But with that kind of support system, your will to live won’t go away that easily. You could say you were lucky but I’m sure everyone around thought they’re luckier to have you around longer.” Of course, he’s not an exception.

 

However, for Baekhyun, that was a little farther from the truth. He’s human too and he couldn’t even count the number of times he wished he had died already or thought that it was better if he had died in that crash because then the people he loved the most around him wouldn’t have suffered. But, whenever he looked at Sehun, he was always reminded of the fact that what he had was more than what some people could have asked for. In his case, he still had his parents and Sehun, but in Sehun’s case, he lost both his parents, and his relatives even had the nerves to argue about custody before the mourning has even passed. He was alone. That’s why Baekhyun owed it to him. He had no right to complain, give up, nor even think of dying.

 

Moreover, he got to experience this kind of feeling he doesn’t quite understand yet. His heart throbbed when he sees Chanyeol but it’s different from the painful throbs he had in the hospital. This kind was full of excitement. He didn’t have these feelings when he first met the professor but before he knew it, his thoughts would sometimes divert towards the young professor, and then more often than not, when Chanyeol called his name, he felt his breath being taken away. It was a pretty feeling.

 

“You know Professor, I really like you.” It was the only conclusion.

 

“Really? I’m honored.”

 

Baekhyun snickered. “The kind of like a student should’ve be having with his professor.”

 

“Yeah?” Chanyeol said, taking him almost a minute before realizing. “Wait, what?”

 

“Don’t you feel the same way?” Baekhyun gasped. “Are you taking advantage of me?”

 

“What?” The question was directed towards the accusation and the sudden 360 change in Baekhyun’s behavior.

 

“Because I’ll have you know Sehun is pretty good at beating people up, he just looks like he isn’t because he has very good skin but he could send you to the hospital--”

 

“Baekhyun--”

 

“And my neighbor who used to babysit us used to be a gangster--” Baekhyun was then insulated against the remaining words as Chanyeol seemed to have stolen a kiss from the smaller boy. Baekhyun froze up, as his head slowly got filled with overwhelming thoughts. He was completely inundated by the sudden gesture.

 

“I like you the same way, okay? “ Chanyeol said after breaking off the kiss.

 

Baekhyun felt his face heating up in embarrassment. “No, you don’t.”

 

“I do.”

 

“You weren’t even planning on telling me.”

 

“That’s because I’ve been trying to hold back. I would’ve been fine just looking at you, making you laugh, taking you out on small dates like this, because I know if I do anything more than that, I might regret it. And right now, you’re stirring me up so much.”

 

“No I’m not.”

 

“Yes you are.”

 

“I’m not.”

 

Chanyeol grabbed his hand and placed it on his chest. “Can you feel it?”

 

He could. Baekhyun could feel his rising heartbeat, and it felt overwhelming in a sense, singing songs of amore.

 

“Do you believe me now?”

 

Who wouldn’t? Baekhyun wondered and nodded. It seemed his tantrum somehow backfired as he couldn’t even look at Chanyeol in the eye.

 

--

 

Baekhyun was in bliss going home. If this was what really felt like to actually be in love. He was in love with a lot of things--music, books, pancakes, flowers, the sky and et cetera. But he’d never felt this kind of love before. It’s new and warm. And he couldn’t stop smiling. But he had to fix how flustered he looked as he neared his home.

 

He massaged his face and tried to mentally convince himself that nothing very special happened this day as he opened the door to their house.

 

“I’m home.” He announced, expecting to hear Sehun with his sharp remarks.

 

“Welcome back!” That was not Sehun.

 

“Mom! Dad! You’re home early.” He managed to reply, hopefully not sounding to surprised to see both his parents at home this early.

 

“So, how was your date?” His mom asked. His dad wasn’t subtle with the curiosity either. Baekhyun immediately turned to Sehun who just looked away. “Oh, you know Hunnie’s a bad liar. So, how was it?”

 

“It was fine. We went to a lot of places.”

 

“How about the person you were with?”

 

“He was great.” The room fell in silence.

 

“Honey, he said he.” His mom said while opening her palm.

 

“I know. I heard.” And then his dad gave her a bill.

 

Baekhyun gaped, but still relieved. “You had a bet?” He asked while following his parents to the kitchen. It’s great that his parents were somewhat open-minded, it really is, because they believed that music is for everyone, and that was the same with love.

 

“Come on, we always do that with Sehun.”

 

“Well, yeah, because he goes on a lot of dates.”

 

“No, I don’t.”

 

“Well, not since you found out you’re gay and not bi.”

 

They both turned to their parents in worry and found their mom counting the bills their dad was giving her. “MOM!”

 

--

 

Baekhyun jumped on the bed with a heavy sigh. Today was really a special day. Everything felt surreal. Just this morning, he was in the same place, getting ready for the date. He didn’t think it was anything special then. He thought it was the same as whenever he and Sehun would go somewhere together, having fun. But, it clearly wasn’t, as every time he thought about it, every time he saw Chanyeol’s face, his chest tightened and his heart rate started to elevate.

 

It’s almost like he’s having an attack. He clutched his chest as his body slowly curled into a C.

 

“Baekhyun, it’s your turn to bath--” Sehun stopped by the door. “Baekhyun? Baekhyun!” He immediately ran inside when he noticed Baekhyun curling up in pain. “What’s wrong?” He asked, full of worry. He’d seen him like this before but it’d been almost a year since. “Mom! Mom!”

 

--

 

The morning was unbelievably quiet. It’s the same school and the same students around him but somehow there was something missing. When lunch came, he finally realized what it was, but decided to continue through the day as it was. The outcome was normal, probably.

 

The bell rang. “Alright, that’s it for today. See you tomorrow. And don’t forget your reports, okay?”

 

“Yes, professor!” The students replied while grabbing the bags and slowly emptying the classroom.

 

Chanyeol sighed and leaned his head against the back of his chair. The room’s quiet and empty now. He was suddenly reminded of the time he missed his next class when Baekhyun somehow managed to corner him. He even changed his schedule in the spur of the moment. It was ridiculous. And pathetic. Definitely pathetic.

 

When he leaned back up, Baekhyun’s face startled him. Baekhyun was sitting on the chair in front of his desk, grinning. “That’s funny.”

 

“What are you doing here?”

 

“What do you mean? It’s a school day.”

 

“I mean, you missed morning classes right? Did you cut classes?”

 

“I didn’t. Don’t worry, Professor.” Baekhyun assured. “Something just came up at home. Sehun wanted to take the rest of the day off but I told him I already missed enough school days.”

 

“You dont have to push yourself it it’s something important. Plus, exams just finished.”

 

“Fine you got me.” Baekhyun said while leaning down on the desk, his arms supporting his upper body weight. “I didn’t want to miss a day seeing your face.”

 

“Then I won’t complain anymore.” Chanyeol leaned forward and gave Baekhyun a peck on the lips.

 

“Also, this!” Baekhyun pulled out something from his pocket and slammed it on the table. “We got our grades today.”

 

Chanyeol scanned his report card and was in loss of words how Baekhyun’s grades are 85 and above, with his highest being 98. “Wow, Baekhyun.”

 

“That’s not even the most shocking part. It’s this!” Baekhyun then took out another paper from his pocket. “Sehun’s report card.”

 

“He passed all of his subjects!” Chanyeol exclaimed after scanning the report card for at least three times to make sure. Although he still barely passed most of them. “So he can do it if he tries.”

 

“That’s thanks to you.” Baekhyun said with a cheeky smile.

 

Chanyeol chuckled. “I’m not gonna argue with that.” The bell rang then, startling Baekhyun.

 

“Oh, I have to look for Professor Lee.” Baekhyun said after checking the time. He leaned towards Chanyeol and kissed him on the cheeks before skipping towards the door. “I’ll see you later!”

 

Chanyeol watched him go. His instincts told him to scold Baekhyun for running in the hallways but of course, things had gotten complicated, and he just couldn’t scold Baekhyun for something like that.

 

“And here I was wondering if you got yourself a girlfriend.” Luhan asked, leaning against the door with his arms crossed. Of course, Luhan chose this time to start sprouting some nonsense.

 

Chanyeol crooked his eyebrows. “What are you talking about?” He asked, slightly uninterested, as he organized his things.

 

“I was curious. But seriously, a student? Unless you’re trying to be a counselor then that’s acceptable for me, otherwise, no.”

 

“I honestly have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

“You know I don’t stick my nose into other people’s businesses unless it’s something concerning.” Luhan sighed. “I heard my students gossiping about a certain teacher and a certain student casually raising suspicions so I personally went to investigate myself.”

 

“They’re kids, they gossip about everything. Come on, it’s high school. We’re not supposed to take them seriously.”

 

“I hope you’re right, Chanyeol, I really do. You know these things better than I do. But still, I’m gonna warn you.”

 

Chanyeol appreciated Luhan concern but like this, it made him conscious as to how he had been treating Baekhyun so far. He didn’t think something like this would raise suspicions.

 

“You know the director’s not gonna let you off the hook just because you’re the youngest here.”

 

“Luhan, I’m not stupid.”

 

Luhan stared at him, probably trying to figure out his thoughts. “If you say so.” He said, shrugging his shoulders, before leaving. In the end, he couldn’t tell whether Chanyeol was being honest with him or not because most of the time he only said the words people want to hear and not what they need to hear.

 

Chanyeol sighed. Maybe Luhan was right. Maybe he should let society dictate his actions this time. Chanyeol didn’t know what difference it would make but regretting in the middle isn’t that easy. But he could try changing it.

 

That next day, he was called into the director’s office. He expected something bad since teachers weren’t usually called into the director’s office for something so serious but seeing the scattered pictures on the director’s desk when he came in, he had a pretty good hunch on how bad it actually is.

 

“Professor Park.”

 

“These are...” They were photos of him and Baekhyun at the park yesterday. There were only four pictures at the same angle but a lot can already be concluded.

 

“These photos were secured by one of the teachers this morning when he noticed the students passing them around class.”

 

“These are just kids snooping--”

 

“Professor Park.”

 

Chanyeol opened his mouth but the director was quick to cut him off. “I’m not looking for an explanation for this. Whatever it is, I would rather this issue disappear completely. Not only will this affect the faculty’s reputation to the students and especially to the parents, it puts my position on the line as well.”

 

“For now, we are able to keep these rumors from spreading. You’re lucky enough the student who took these photos went straight to us for consultation otherwise it would’ve been a bigger problem. I would also like to remind you that I am aware of the gossips about you circulating around the school and I honestly expected more from you. I don’t want to be disappointed by you, Professor, but I am disheartened.”

 

Chanyeol thought there was no use trying to defend his dignity now.

 

“I expect you to reflect on this, Professor. From now on, I don’t want to see you anywhere near this boy. If I hear anything about this matter again, I will retract your privileges myself.”

 

Chanyeol sighed as he closes the door behind him, the director’s words still echoing around him.

 

“What did I tell you?” Chanyeol turned to Luhan who was waiting by the door. “Is it bad?”

 

“No. Just something about privileges.”

 

Luhan sighed. “What are you gonna do?”

 

“What I have to do. I don’t really have a choice, do I?” But he wondered, still, how will fate play his role this time?

 

“Well you’re not that stupid so I’m not that worried,” Luhan said, shrugging his shoulders. “And it’s good to be reckless once in a while. Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.”

 

Chanyeol heaved a deep sigh.

 

“What?” Luhan asked out of concern.

 

It took a few seconds before Chanyeol finally said, “I want to eat some pizza.”

 

Luhan shook his head, chuckling.

 

--

 

It had already been two weeks since he last saw that face, last heard his laugh and last felt his calming presence. He wondered how he hadn’t even seen him once after that incident when they used to just bump into each other in the hallways, surprised yet not surprised, greeting as if their days couldn’t go by without subtle intimate formalities.

 

Maybe it was for the better. He tried to change the course of time and this was what he got. It was only natural for everything to be disrupted, for everything to feel so empty because even though this was what he wanted, he still looked forward to more days with him. Knowing what could’ve been is more painful that knowing what had been.

 

“He’s completely dead.” Luhan said to one of the teachers. He sighed and slowly made his way towards Chanyeol’s desk. After getting ignored or rather, after his presence failed to catch the taller’s attention, Luhan forcefully dropped the file on his desk, making a loud sound and surprising the taller.

 

“Wha--” Chanyeol looked up at Luhan who was giving him a certain look. “What do you want?”

 

Luhan sighed. “I hate to be the harbinger of bad news but,” He placed a folder--an utterly familiar folder--on top of his desk. “You were assigned to sub a class.”

 

--

 

Chanyeol stopped in front of the door, an action he had yet to grow accustomed with. He never had to prepare himself whenever he had classes. He used to just walk inside like it was nothing but now things have changed.

 

“Honestly, with your probationary status, I don’t understand why the director approved of this but I think he’s giving you a second chance. So, don’t up okay?”

 

Probably. Guilt could make people do things.

 

However, he convinced himself that there was nothing to be guilty about. He wondered where that strength came from. With that in mind, he slowly opened the door, and the noise from inside gradually disappeared as he approached the table.

 

It seemed the students were confused thus the greeting was delayed. “It’s okay. No need to stand.” The students nodded hesitantly as Chanyeol opened the attendance sheet. He called them one by one until he arrived at that familiar name. He wanted to come off naturally but he ended up taking a deep breath, probably to calm his nerves, before he finally called his name. “Byun Baekhyun?” Silence responded to him. Then he finally decided to look up on his seat. It was empty. “He’s not here?” He asked the class in which some of them started whispering to each other.

 

“Professor!” A student yelled, raising their hand. “Byun hasn’t been coming for two weeks now.”

 

Chanyeol’s heart almost stopped. “W-What? Why?”

 

The student looked around, partly hesitant. “We heard from Sehun that he’s back in the hospital.” Chanyeol’s eyes widened. “But he hasn’t dropped out from school so he’s probably coming back.”

 

The day Chanyeol most dreaded just had to come in the most surprising way, like a murderer pulling a fast one on him. He was in a state of worry, horror and physical shock all at once. He recalled the days that will come, the tiny bits of previews in his little head, and he felt his stomach turning and his mind losing against the current.

 

“I--” He started as he struggled to find the right words, if ever there were. “I need to--to take bathroom break, so uh--”  Of course, his futile attempts just turned him into a stuttering mess.  The students were looking at him weirdly, whispering to each other, probably trying to comprehend his reaction.

 

He ignored the murmurs, the whispers, the indifferent looks, and minutes later he found himself rushing towards the door and out of the room. The noise behind him started to build up as he started running. It didn’t matter. At that moment, the only thing that mattered to him was seeing the boy in person.

 

He was forced to stop his tracks then when Luhan blocked his way. “Where are you going? You have class, don’t you?”

 

Chanyeol decided to ignore him and continued walking.

 

“Chanyeol!” Luhan yelled as he ran in front of Chanyeol, stopping him once again. “Don’t do this.”

 

Chanyeol stared at Luhan, trying to study his expression. He couldn’t keep ignoring him because more than anything, even though he only had his own interests in mind, Luhan was a friend. “I’m sorry. I need to do this.” He couldn’t tell him exactly what really was happening but he hoped just a little bit could get through.

 

--

 

Chanyeol rushed to the hospital with his emotions out of place. When he finally reached the floor Baekhyun was in, he halted and tried to gather his composure. He waited until he finally calmed down before walking towards Baekhyun’s room. His parents walked out just in time with the doctor, discussing something, and he looked away so they don’t recognize him as they pass by.

 

Chanyeol stood in front of the door. He took a peak through the small glass window before knocking. It broke his heart, seeing Baekhyun sitting on the hospital bed. The image was all too familiar to him. He knocked then, and waited for Baekhyun to turn towards the door before coming in.

 

“Professor.” Baekhyun said in surprise and quickly realized. “Chanyeol, what are you--”

 

The end of the sentence was cut off as Chanyeol had immediately threw his arms around him. Baekhyun was, of course, caught off-guard. “I’m okay, Chanyeol.” He said softly.

 

“Chanyeol, I’m fine,” Baekhyun said once again. “I’m okay. I just fainted but my parents are too paranoid they had to admit me here.” Chanyeol hugged him tighter because he knew. “I’m sorry I wasn’t able to tell you. I haven’t seen you for a while and I didn’t want to distract you from your work. You were busy, right?” Chanyeol lookdc at him this time, breaking away and his heart dropped. Baekhyun didn’t have any knowledge about the pictures or the real reason why he’d been avoiding him. Just as so. He didn’t want Baekhyun to blame himself because he was, in every way, not at fault.

 

He stayed there and the two of them talked about anything under the sun, literally anything, even pandas and sloths somehow made their way into their conversation. “I want to live as either a sloth or a panda, there’s no in-between.” was what Baekhyun said, apart from all the other peculiar things he has said that afternoon.

 

And then Chanyeol realized how much he missed him. His smile, his laugh, even his weird habit of biting his lips when he’s listening intently. Chanyeol wanted to call him out on the habit, since it had a devastating effect on him, but he wouldn’t want him to stop either so he ended up deciding to just bear with it. Just like that, the agony he was under for the past few weeks were just gone. What he wouldn’t give for them to stay like this forever.

 

--

 

When he returned to the school the next day, he hadn’t even made one step inside the teachers’ lounge when the Dean called for him. Not only that, students were whispering around him as he walked. They obviously weren’t subtle enough.

 

In the end, he was suspended from work for 5 days, which worked out well for him since he had planned to apply for leave anyway. This wasn’t something he could just brush off anymore. He went straight to the hospital afterwards.

 

“Still, what kind of teacher goes out on a date with a student?” Sehun argued and Jongin light kicked his knee.

 

“Sehun!” Baekhyun warned from his bed.

 

Somehow, they all wounded up talking about the most trivial matter in the room, with all of them present.

 

“I was just asking.”

 

This had been Chanyeol’s everyday life for the past three days. Baekhyun wouldn’t point it out but he had unnecessarily spent a lot of time in his room, catering to his every need. Baekhyun did once snap though, when Chanyeol offered to help him take a dump. He was very angry and made it perfectly clear that he had two arms and legs that worked properly.

 

Sehun leaned closer to Jongin and made a gesture towards Chanyeol. “Professor Romeo is at it again.”

 

Chanyeol crooked his eyebrows, wondering how long it has really been.

 

“You think that’s what happens to people who stay unnecessarily long inside the hospital?”

 

Baekhyun sighed and turned to Chanyeol. “Chanyeol. Chanyeol!” Chanyeol finally reacted at the second call. “Are you tired? You can go home if you want.”

 

“No, I’m fine.”

 

“Go home.” Baekhyun said monotonously.

 

“Yeah, hyung, why do you have to spend all day here anyway? It’s not like Baekhyun’s dying.” Jongin said out of the blue, with obvious ignorance. The atmosphere suddenly changed and Jongin carefully placed the apple he was going to eat back on the plate. “So, I’m gonna go first and reflect on my actions.”

 

Sehun glared at him and Jongin immediately whispered a sorry at him with his hands clapped together.

 

Chanyeol sighed from across the room. “I’m coming with.” He said to Jongin. “Just because you forced me to.” He added, looking at Baekhyun.

 

“Okay, I’m at fault. But I shouldn’t be the only one relaxing and lying on a bed.”

 

“But I only got suspended for 5 days.”

 

“With three days you spent in this room.”

 

“You probably haven’t reflected a bit, have you?” Sehun interceded, receiving a glare from Baekhyun, which forced him to remain quiet for the rest of the conversation.

 

Baekhyun turned back to Chanyeol. “Say, why don’t you go and have fun tomorrow?”

 

“That sounds nice!” Jongin chirped excitedly near the door.

 

“Not you. You have school.” Chanyeol said sternly and Jongin pouted angrily at him. Baekhyun couldn’t help but laugh. Chanyeol grabbed his things then, leaning to give Baekhyun a kiss (wherein Sehun openly showed his disgust), before walking towards the door. “Alright, Baekhyun, it’s not my fault if you miss me tomorrow.”

 

“I’ll always miss you.” Baekhyun said, smiling as he watched the two slowly disappear behind the door. Of course, Chanyeol had to give him one last smile.

 

“Tomorrow, huh.” Sehun said, walking over to Baekhyun’s bed. Baekhyun just forced a smile at him.

 

--

 

“Hey, I have a question.” Jongin said out of the blue when they finally arrived home. Chanyeol passed it out as a normal conversation and instead headed straight to the kitchen to grab some water, almost ignoring Jongin. Jongin followed.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“You chose Baekhyun because the outcome is good, right?”

 

Chanyeol paused. “Why do you ask?”

 

“I mean, you chose him because you have a happy ending with him, didn’t you?”

 

Chanyeol closed the fridge behind him. “Where is this coming from?”

 

It was obvious that Jongin was hesitating but the two of them didn’t really keep trivial things from each other. “Well, you see, since Baekhyun is admitted in the hospital, Sehun he said he might not participate in the tournament.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because he’d rather stay with Baekhyun at the hospital.” Jongin sounded like he was sulking. After all, it’s obvious how Sehun tended to put Baekhyun first over everything in his life. “And coach and the whole team are worried since he’s one of our best players.”

 

“I see.”

 

“So?” Jongin asked, staring straight at him.

 

Chanyeol stared back at him and then carefully put down his cup. “Yes. Baekhyun has a happy ending.”

 

Jongin’s sigh of relief almost burst through their roof. “That has got to be the only spoiler people will be happy with.”

 

“And what are you going to do with this information?”

 

“Well now I can be as desperate as I can in convincing Sehun to play.”

 

Chanyeol replied with a soft chuckle.

 

“I have never been so thankful of that freaky ability of yours.” Jongin added.

 

“I’m flattered.”

 

Jongin jumped out of his seat, probably getting into the bath now that he has secured his relief, but he stopped by the doorway, looking back at Chanyeol. “No, but seriously...”

 

“I know.” Chanyeol reassured. Jongin gave him a rare smile before leaving and missed Chanyeol’s frown.

 

--

 

Chanyeol tried to do something fun--he went to the library, to the musicals showing in town, he even tried baking--but he just got distracted with thoughts of Baekhyun that it swallowed his energy. In the end, he found himself walking in the hallways of the hospital, the same hallway he saw for the past three days.

 

When he arrived by the door, he noticed some voices and took a peek at the small window. Baekhyun was talking to someone. When he recognized who the person was, he immediately walked in. That blond hair is hard to miss to be honest.

 

Baekhyun and Luhan turned to him, surprised.

 

“What are you doing?” He immediately asked Luhan.

 

“I wanted to see the golden boy so I came to visit.” Luhan replied, giving him a look. “He doesn’t look bad. I thought the worse has happened since you left in the middle of class.”

 

“You left in the middle of your class?!”

 

“Oops. I better go.” Luhan said while walking to the door with a grin on his face. “Bye Baekhyun. I’ll see you at school.”

 

“Thank you for coming.” Baekhyun responded politely. Chanyeol waited before Luhan was completely out of sight before walking towards Baekhyun and taking a seat beside the bed. He leaned on top of Baekhyun’s thighs, almost hugging them. “What’s wrong?” Baekhyun asked, brushing Chanyeol’s hair between his fingers.

 

“I’m replenishing my energy.”

 

Baekhyun chuckled at his juvenile response. “So why are you here?”

 

“Because you missed me.”

 

Baekhyun sighed. “I was going to give this to you tomorrow but,” Chanyeol perked up in curiosity and Baekhyun fished out a box hiding under the pillow. “Here. For you. It’s your birthday, right?” Chanyeol’s eyes widen, overwhelmed, as he took the box from Baekhyun. His birthday. He didn’t even realize today was his birthday. “Happy birthday, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun greeted, smiling at him gently.

 

This was why Baekhyun wanted him to take the day-off. It’s not like nobody had given him gifts before, or surprised him, but why was he crying? He could feel his tears falling but he couldn’t make it stop.

 

“Chanyeol?” Baekhyun called his name in worry, bending down so he could see his face more clearly. “You’re crying!”

 

“I’m not crying.” Chanyeol argued. He really should stop crying. Being so vulnerable in front of Baekhyun was just embarrassing.

 

“Really, Chanyeol?” Baekhyun teased. “Come on, don’t cry.” He cooed while softly brushing Chanyeol’s hair.

 

Baekhyun was kind, forgiving and bright. Chanyeol thought he didn’t deserve it, but he’d rather it be him than someone else. Baekhyun was beauty itself and Chanyeol was blinded by it.

 

--

 

The university was rather busy these days. Chanyeol felt tired even when he’s only looking at them, and he’s only been back for two days since his suspension. The students really do take school festivals very seriously. The teachers, of course, were no exceptions since they had clubs and committees to monitor and advise to. Only Chanyeol was exempted, after all, the Dean already hated him (probably). Chanyeol grabbed his bag, ready to take his leave, when the door suddenly slammed open, giving him a slight startle. What startled him more though was the sight of Baekhyun’s brother, Sehun, panting and almost sweating.

 

“Is it true?” He said, confusing Chanyeol.

 

“What--”

 

“What Jongin said,” Sehun said sternly. Chanyeol was taken aback. “Is it?

 

Chanyeol sighed when he finally understood what Sehun meant. “That brat.”

 

Sehun walked inside in an aggressive manner. “So? What’s this about?”

 

“Listen, I need you to calm down first. I can’t tell you everything unless you clear your head, Sehun.”

 

It didn’t take a long time for Sehun to gather his thoughts and finally sit down on the couch opposite to Chanyeol. He still, of course, had that snarling expression like he knew he was going to hear some bull conspiracy any minute now and Chanyeol can’t say he wasn’t offended entirely but you don’t really argue with brats to that extent.

 

Chanyeol finally started explaining about his still unexplainable ability, slowly and carefully though, just in case Sehun would suddenly throw profanities at him.

 

“You’re telling me...that if you look at a person’s eyes you can see your future with that person?”

 

“Yeah. Well, they’re more like previews actually.”

 

“And you expect me to believe all of this?”

 

Chanyeol sighed. “Look, I’m just telling you what it is and what it is not. You came here on your own so it doesn’t really matter to me if you believe me or not.”

 

“Would it be really weird if I believed you?”

 

“Well, everyone has a reason why they believe in something. It’s human nature.” Chanyeol didn’t have a normal teenage life so he couldn’t relate to what Sehun was going through now to much extent, but he understood him enough in a way that they shared the same kind of sentiment towards Baekhyun’s condition. “It’s okay to cling onto that little bit of hope.”

 

Sehun sighed. “Well, I suppose you’re not really the type to make up crap.”

 

Chanyeol shrugs his shoulders. “Well...”

 

Sehun chuckled, the kind that sounded like he’s humiliating himself. “Oh, god, this is ridiculous.”

 

Chanyeol smiled before he finally laughing with him, realizing now how much of a freak the two of them must be in their situation now. But none of it even mattered.

 

“You’re a good person,” Sehun gave him a look and Chanyeol chuckled before continuing. “You knew where we lived and you didn’t say anything.”

 

“It was none of my business.”

 

“That’s why. You always put your brother’s interests first--”

 

“I meant,” Sehun interrupted. “Your libido. It’s none of my business.”

 

“...Oh.” Chanyeol tried not to sound awkward but there was no way to get out of that. “How...considerate...of you.” Really no way.

 

Sehun sighed. “Well, this is just ridiculous.”

 

“Yeah.” Chanyeol says. “So you’re gonna play this weekend?”

 

“I feel like someone just pulled out a knife from my chest.” Sehun was convinced he’d never felt relief like this before. “Of course, I’ll play.”

 

“That’s good. Baekhyun will be happy.”

 

“Yeah. And Jongin will finally stop whining.”

 

Chanyeol laughed in response. “Well, I guess he still got what he wanted.”

 

“That somehow makes me angry.” Sehun said before his mind wandered somewhere else, covering the room with silence. And then it all finally sunk in. “You’ll take care of him, right?”

 

Chanyeol turned to him. “Hm?”

 

“There will come a time when he won’t need me anymore, when he’d have to let go of his younger brother, at least I have to know that someone will take care of him in my place, then I’d be able to let go too.” Their brotherhood is a beautiful thing. It almost made him feel guilty but this wasn’t the first he’s heard of it. Still, the feeling doesn’t change.

 

“Yeah. Don’t worry. I will.” Chanyeol replied.

 

--

 

Chanyeol blinked his eyes open and looked around aimlessly. He must’ve have fallen asleep. It had been long since the last time he’d fallen asleep somewhere out of his comfort zone. Maybe it’s because the room was quiet. Or because of the calm weather. Or because of Baekhyun beside him, leaning against his torso, casually flipping through the pages of a book he’d been reading since Chanyeol arrived earlier. That’s right. He was tired when he came in earlier so he shamelessly squeezed in the hospital bed (or rather, Baekhyun let him shamelessly squeeze in the bed) and fell asleep in the middle of recharging his energy.

 

Baekhyun was still focused on his book. Chanyeol felt like his arm was about to fall off but he doesn’t want to disturb Baekhyun, especially when he looked so candidly beautiful like this. It’s times like this when Chanyeol thought that his ability was completely and utterly useless, and that he’d rather have something that’d allow him to capture beautiful moments like this with his eyes. So he’s forced to do so in manual by staring at Baekhyun as long as he wanted.

 

“I know what the real Baekhyun is like.”

 

“Okay, what brought this on?” Baekhyun asked, but his eyes were still on his book.

 

“Remember that time when we walked to the gym together?” Baekhyun remembered. He didn’t forget even the smallest moments. “I think I know what the real Baekhyun is like now.”

 

“Alright, if you’re so confident.”

 

“The real Baekhyun is very clumsy, and mischievous. He hates depressing classics, particularly everything by Shakespeare. He gets embarrassed when the person he likes hears him sing.” Baekhyun giggled, remembering the incident at the music room. Surprisingly, he wasn’t aware of that little fact either. “He falls in love with anything, because he only sees the beautiful side of everything. He’s...in love with love.”

 

“And you.” Baekhyun said while looking at him, closing the book on his lap.

 

Chanyeol gave him a look. “That’s unfair.”

 

“I’m in love with how much I love you.” Baekhyun said softly. It was, love was, such a pretty thing.

 

“I fell in love with you first.”

 

“It’s not a contest, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun said while chuckling.

 

“Maybe. But I still win.” Chanyeol declared, kissing Baekhyun’s forehead. “What?” He asked when he noticed the smaller staring at him.

 

“Remember when we first met?” Chanyeol nodded. “You were following me and then Jongin accidentally tripped and the cake landed on me.”

 

“Too bad, Baekhyun, it seems my memory is better than yours. That’s not the first time we met.” Baekhyun raised his eyebrows, curious. “We met inside Clockworks. We were at the counter together.”

 

“We were?”

 

“You probably didn’t notice me, but I noticed you then. And then, the hourglass figure fell and we both tried to catch it.”

 

Baekhyun perked up, finally remembering that little moment. “Ah! That was you?!” Chanyeol nodded. “Wow, you can even remember little details like those?”

 

There was no way he could forget that time. That time he saw everything.

 

“Sounds like fate.”

 

Chanyeol’s attention was back at Baekhyun, who was now playing with his hands. His hands looked so small and fragile against his. “Fate?”

 

“Yeah. It’s like some cliche romance setting.” Baekhyun continued. “And we’re the main characters.”

 

“We must be a hit.”

 

“Oh, please.” Baekhyun said, breaking into fits of laughter. “I wonder when it’ll end though. I hope it’s a good ending.”

 

“Why are you talking about the ending already?” Chanyeol said, pulling Baekhyun closer. “We’re still here.”

 

“Sorry.”

 

“We’ll always be here.”

 

Baekhyun smiles. “I know.”

 

--

 

The day of Sehun and Jongin’s game, the weather was rather gloomy. Chanyeol had to run to the station so he could arrive at the hospital before the rain droped. He cursed when he almost missed the bus as he was not used to the concept. He had to leave his car at the school for Jongin and Sehun to use later after the game, which was a good decision despite his mental protests, seeing as how the weather would turn bad later. He opted to watch the game but Sehun and Jongin scolded him, forcing him to stay with Baekhyun so the smaller wouldn’t feel so lonely and regretful on having to miss out on an important event.

 

Fortunately, he arrived in one piece, although his clothes were quite wet from the sudden rain when he got off the bus. “I bought macaroons for you.” He announced as soon as he walked inside Baekhyun’s room. He remembered Baekhyun talking about the nurses who’d give him macaroons from time to time when he accidentally passed by the shop on the way to the hospital. “I don’t know what flavor you exactly liked so I bought a whole pack.” He added while taking off his coat and placing them on the chair to dry.

 

“Baekhyun? What’s wrong?”

 

“Huh? Oh, nothing. Ah you bought macaroons!”

 

Chanyeol pulled the box back. “What’s wrong?” He reiterated and Baekhyun had no choice this time.

 

“The patient...across the hall. She died this morning.”

 

“Oh no.”

 

“Her family wouldn’t stop crying, especially her daughters.”

 

“I’m sorry, Baekhyun, that must’ve been really awful.” Chanyeol cooed while gently rubbing his back.

 

Baekhyun then suddenly grabbed his arm, giving him a slight startle. “Hey, I’ll be fine, won’t I?” Chanyeol’s hand stopped. “I mean, I don’t feel any pain. And my heart hasn’t been hurting for the past weeks. I don’t know why they’re still keeping me here.” Baekhyun was shaking.

 

Chanyeol immediately embraced the smaller. “Yes, you’ll be fine, don’t worry.”

 

“But you don’t know that.”

 

“I know.” Chanyeol said. “I know you’ll be fine.”

 

“I don’t want to die, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun murmured against his chest, nearly sobbing.

 

“You won’t.”

 

They stayed like that for a while until Baekhyun finally calmed down. It was normal, to suddenly freak out and be frightened, for all your courage to be broken down in pieces in just one second of doubt.

 

Fortunately, Baekhyun’s parents arrived, lightening up the atmosphere again.

 

“Chanyeol, you’re here again!” Baekhyun’s mother said while walking inside carrying a few boxes. Chanyeol immediately went to help carry them. Baekhyun honestly didn’t know why his mother kept on acting surprised when she always saw Chanyeol here anyway. “Honey, the professor’s here!”

 

“Again?” Baekhyun’s dad yelled from behind the door. “Help me with these, will you, young man?”

 

“Hi, B, how are you?”

 

“I’m fine, Mom. What are those?”

 

“Oh, we passed by this newly-opened restaurant on the way here. We were just gonna order a few to help but since Sehun has an important game today, we thought we could have a small celebration.”

 

“We don’t even know if they’re gonna win.”

 

His mother clicked her tongue. “What did we say about that again?”

 

“Win or lose, it’s worth celebrating.”

 

“That’s right.” His mom nodded, throwing up a peace sign.

 

Baekhyun passed a look at Chanyeol who only subtly laughed at him. Afterwards, Baekhyun’s father forced Chanyeol to help out in taking out the packed dinners from the boxes. They were at least five boxes. Honestly, what was small about this? But his parents had always been generous and they’re the happiest in the act of giving. Baekhyun just watched them, smiling.

 

He looked outside. Rain was pouring out. The world seemed to be in blur. He clutched his chest as he felt his heart throb. Painfully. No, not now. He doesn’t want to ruin everyone’s mood.

 

His mother noticed it first. “What’s wrong? Does your chest hurt?”

 

“A bit.”

 

“Maybe you should lie down--”

 

“Ah!” Baekhyun cried out. That was one very painful stab. His father and Chanyeol turned to him then.

 

“How bad is it?” His mother asked but he could only cry out in pain. He was leaning forward and he felt like stabbing his chest. It was too much pain. His father told Chanyeol to call the doctor and Chanyeol immediately ran outside in panic. When he came back, Baekhyun was still crying. The nurses were surrounding him. He could see the blood on the sheets, and from his mouth. Chanyeol felt his heart sink.

 

“Doc, what’s happening?!” Baekhyun’s mother asked in a panicked voice as soon as the doctor came in. A few more doctors followed, rummaging around the room.

 

Chanyeol ran out then, terrified. And he kept reminding himself that he knew Baekhyun would be fine. He would be. This was just false pretense. He knew what would happen.

 

--

 

Sehun groaned by the bench, canceling out the noise of the stadium. The coach was giving final instructions. There’s a 10-point difference between the two team, with theirs being the lesser. He felt frustrated. Maybe he wasn’t giving it his all? He had a clear goal for deciding to join the regular line-up, and that was to brag to Baekhyun the trophy he didn’t get to see last time. That would really make him smile.

 

“You alright?” Jongin asked with a light tap on the shoulder. Sehun merely nodded. “Don’t worry, we still have one minute.”

 

That’s right.

 

--

 

The final minute.

 

Chanyeol’s eyes remain fixed on the second hand of the clock as it started moving, slowly taking away the moments in every second. This was, by far, the most painful sixty seconds he had the misfortune of witnessing--those previews he had with strangers were nothing compared to this.

 

And then, when the last and the last tick came, he closed his eyes.

 

He could feel time moving around him. Time was dancing in lento, its chords and strings extending slowly into the surface, matching everything into its own beat. The Timekeeper was rather elegant, nothing less he expected.

 

Chanyeol remembered so well how he carried himself. He carried himself with the highest regard.

 

“Ah, the broken cassette tape is here again.” He said, yawning. “Benvenuto!” His name was Zitao.

“Every element in the world is personified in some way. I’m the clock itself, and you’re just a part of it.” Chanyeol remembered him saying the first time they met. It was valuable information but for some reason, it didn’t impose any difference to him.

 

“I didn’t come here to hear your insults.”

 

“Probably not. I just thought you should now that you have less time than I do. Fate is exhausted, after all.”

 

“I came here for that....that bargain.” Chanyeol murmured, his head laid low.

 

“Again? Why are you still asking me this? Let the story end, Chanyeol. You don’t have any more time left.”

 

That’s right. This isn’t the first time he’s heard this tempo. It might have already been a hundred times. He lost count along the way.

 

“I can’t let it end.”

 

“You’re pathetic.” Tao said in mockery. “But I can’t blame you. Falling in love is scary after all. It’s why I prefer hiding from everyone else. You don’t know when it’ll come.” He continued, sighing.

 

“So you’ll do it?”

 

“Again, you mean. But Chanyeol, you do know that even if I do turn back time and he lives, if you end up exhausting your time, there will come a day when you won’t be a part of that replay anymore.”

 

Chanyeol froze on the spot. “I know. I know that.” He didn’t need to be reminded of it.

 

Tao gave him a confused look. “Then what’s the point?”

 

“I just want him to live.”

 

He’d made this bargain countless times that it doesn’t feel odd anymore. What was the point? His time was not important. Someone else’s was.

 

“That’s it? Turning back time just before he dies so he can live in a replay of borrowed times?” Chanyeol didn’t say anything. Tao was right anyway. And it’s something he’d never understand. “Then I’ll offer you a different deal this time.”

 

Chanyeol looked up at him. “What?”

 

“I’ll turn back time after he dies. That way I can modify everything so it doesn’t end the same away again.” Chanyeol could feel his adrenaline rushing. “It’ll be too much to ask Fate to fix everything afterwards though but if it means having to do this favor for you one last time then I think he won’t complain.” Tao continued but Chanyeol was still fixating about the fact that there’s a possibility that death will be out of the picture.

 

“Then time--”

 

“I won’t ask you for your time for this one.” Tao says. “I’ll take the memories you have with him.”

 

Chanyeol can feel the tempo breaking into a vivace. “W-why?”

 

“Why? As long as you have a connection with him, if your strings aren’t cut off, then the both of you will end up in the same path no matter what. That kind of connection will never be broken. If you cut those strings, then even if you see each other again, nothing else will happen after that that will lead to this, to the ad finem.”

 

And then allegro.

 

Forgetting Baekhyun? That’s absurd. That’s unthinkable.

 

“I’m sorry, Chanyeol. That is the only way. Isn’t that your main objective? So that he could live? What happens when you finally use up all of the time you have for that bargain? There’s no way I’ll be able to turn back time then. And even if I did, with that last glissando you have to offer, what kind of replay will he have living with a ghost note?”

 

That’s right. It’s because he desperately wanted to make that person happy, that’s why he’d been bargaining all of his time for him to borrow--so he could keep smiling like that. So he could live while smiling like that.

 

“What’s your answer?”

 

“I get it.” Chanyeol said, glancing up at Tao, looking at him with bold, gallant eyes. “I’ll take it.”

 

Then suddenly..

 

Adagio.

 

--

 

Chanyeol opened his eyes and saw nothing but darkness. His body was floating in mid-air. He was in the abyss, the place where Zitao dumped his memories. Around him where clips of some of the events he knew so well, playing inside a four-cornered square, circling him. He couldn’t see the bottom and the top, they were just moving around him. And then, the section where the film is broken. The part after Baekhyun’s death. Sehun was perplexed and appalled hearing the news from his mother and immediately stormed out. Jongin followed behind him. Through sheer luck, Sehun managed to see him coming out of the restroom. And that’s when Sehun charged towards him, angry and in despair, while Jonging was helplessly keeping him at bay.

 

“You said he was gonna live!”

 

Chanyeol has seen this scene countless times, and every time, his heart strings break, until the only tune it could play was dolente. He tried so hard to explain to Sehun everything but even he himself couldn’t believe every little thing that came out of his mouth--that’s how much he hated it.

 

“You did it out of pity?”

 

“No, no, god, no,” Chanyeol breathed out. “I loved him, Sehun. I loved him. I really did. And I still do. I still love him. God, I love him so much. I love him so so much, Sehun, I don’t know what to do.”

 

Chanyeol could still feel the grief in his chest.

 

The wake afterwards was the conclusion, the final tune, the final . The wake was when he finally knew that the story has ended. He didn’t cry. He couldn’t. He knew he could just restart everything, until the very last drop of his remaining time. But seeing the person you love the most disappear in front of you countless times doesn’t make the pain any less bearable. Chanyeol had thought of giving up, of ending everything once and for all, but Baekhyun’s smile was all he wanted to see.

 

There was no way he can give that up.

 

“Professor!”

 

“Are you gonna punish me, professor?”

 

“Why so serious, professor?”

 

“Shall we wait for them together, Chanyeol?”

 

Even though not everything that glitters is gold, Baekhyun was beautiful in the most painful way possible. He was grazioso in everything that is inquieto.

 

Chanyeol closed his eyes, tired. And then he could see his own version of the story, straight from his perspective. Everything that Baekhyun was, was utterly beautiful. Until he was left with his last and final memory-- a memory of Baekhyun running away from him. It seemed fitting. But Baekhyun stopped halfway to look back and to flash that bright and beautiful smile at him while waving his hand.

 

To this moment, Chanyeol could still feel his breath being taken away. And then the feeling of despair knowing all these will be gone.

 

And then it came.

 

Finally, de novo.

 

--

 

The buzzer went off and the whole stadium was immediately filled with celebratory cheers. Sehun was on the floor, staring at the scoreboard in disbelief. That’s it, he thought, they won.

 

--

 

Sehun was practically skipping through the hallways, the trophy on his hand, with a big smile on his face. He kicked the door open and displayed the biggest grin the room. “We won!!!”

 

“What, you’re already here?” His dad said monotonously.

 

Sehun pouted. “What’s with that reaction?” He was then distracted by his mother cleaning up the clothes left on the hospital bed. “What’s going on?”

 

“Your brother was discharged today.” His mother told him with a smile. “We were going to surprise you but you got here even before we could leave.”

 

“Where is he?” The comfort room opened then, and Sehun was immediately greeted by a familiar smile. “Hyung!”

 

“So, it was you!” Baekhyun screamed in delight. “I thought I heard someone loud. And you won!!”

 

“Of course. This is the MVP we’re talking about!”

 

“Ah, look at that boastful face.” Their dad said beside them and Sehun responded with a boastful grin. “Alright, we’re gonna have a double celebration today! Come on now. Sehun, help me bring these bags to the car.”

 

“Aye, sir!”

 

“We’ll catch up after we settle the bills!” Their mom yelled before the two disappear behind the door. “Baekhyun, check the drawers if we left something, will you?”

 

Baekhyun nodded. Somehow, this day seemed really emotional. The doctor told him this was the last time he’s going to have to be admitted in the hospital. The medications and regular diet helped him with his speedy recovery, and he didn’t have to fret over his heart anymore. He could finally go back to school, to that life he missed.

 

He opened the drawer and paused. “Are these ours?” He inquiresd while holding them up.

 

“What are those? Postcards?”

 

Baekhyun studied the hard paper. There were three of them, each with a different picture. He flipped each one over, surprised to see words encrypted. The first was a picture of an hourglass figure.

 

Remember, the first time we met?

 

The second one was a picture of a sunset.

 

Remember, the first time we said our ‘I like you’s?

 

And the last one was a picture of a hospital bed. Baekhyun glanced at the bed beside him and then back to the picture, noticing the similarity.

 

Remember, the last time we said our ‘I love you’s?

 

Baekhyun paused.

 

“Are those yours?” Baekhyun yelped in surprise and turned beside him.

 

“Mom! You scared me!”

 

“What are you concentrating on so much about?”

 

Baekhyun sighed. “These aren’t mine. I think someone left this here. I’ll put them back.”

 

“Oh? Won’t the hospital staff throw them away? That will be such a shame if the owner comes back looking for it.”

 

Baekhyun was hesitating now. “T-then I’ll keep it. For the mean time.”

 

“Come on.” His mom called, walking towards the door. Baekhyun grabbed his backpack and immediately followed her out. “I’ll inform the nurse about those.”

 

“Alright.” Baekhyun replied while putting the papers inside his bag.

 

--

 

The shop’s bell rang. “Baekhyun, hi, good morning,”

 

Baekhyun smiled at the counter lady. “Seems like everybody knows me now.”

 

“Of course. You’re a regular here. Do you want the usual?” Baekhyun nodded. “Alright, in a moment.”

 

Baekhyun stood there to wait until he noticed another man, a customer, loitering at the counter. He ought to move but thankfully the other counter opened, with the counter lady hurrying.

 

The counter lady came back after a few minutes with his take out. “Here you go!”

 

He fished through his pocket for the payment but was distracted with the counter lady gasping just in time for him to see the hourglass figure by the counter falling and immediately held out his hand to catch it. He wasn’t the only one with quick reflexes, though, as the man beside him also did the same, and so the hourglass figure was spared. Baekhyun saw his eyes for a second before the man looked away nonchalantly, leaving the figure on his hands.

 

“Sorry! I accidentally hit it with my hand when I was going to collect your payment.”

 

“It’s okay.” Baekhyun replied while placing the hourglass figure back on the counter. “Here.” And the payment afterwards.

 

When he walked towards the station, the take out on his hand, he saw that man again walking in a distance in front of him. He’s walking with another guy, whose voice so loud even he could hear it from this distance. The other guy suddenly yelled and then cursed at his cake falling into the ground. The distance was getting shorter.

 

In the end, Baekhyun decided to overtake them, and swiftly passed by the side.

 

Suddenly, the air felt lighter, and time danced in adagio.

 

He glanced beside him, finally getting a glimpse of the man’s face, before speeding up his pace.

 

He smiled.

 

And then andante, again.

 

End.

 

--

 

Epilogue

 

Zitao sat up, ears fuming in exasperation as Fate’s sniffs echoed through the walls. “Damn it! Keep quiet!” He yelled while marching towards the sobbing mess. “What are you crying for?! Luhan!”

 

Luhan glared at him. “Shut up! This is all your fault!”

 

“I had no choice!”

 

“If you knew that then you should’ve offered him that deal from the start!”

 

Tao looked away. “I was bored.”

 

“You really are a scum.”

 

“Plus, when he first came he offered his own time in exchange, so that he could live another loop with that Baekhyun. You think one loop would be enough for him? I was doing him a favor! I didn’t think he’d do it a hundred times more though.” Tao suddenly felt cold. “That was a mistake.” Luhan glared. “Fine, I’m at fault!” Tao declares, throwing his hands above him in defeat. “But show some gratitude, will you? Now you don’t have to clean up his mess and put everything back in order every time it happens.”

 

Luhan sighed deeply. “I’ll let you get away because of that fact.”

 

“It’s gonna be boring again.” Tao said while yawning.

 

“Then, should we play with this version of them?” Luhan offered, pointing at the TV at the side playing the 60-second story they both knew so well. He grinned, to which Tao respectfully responded in the same manner.

 

“Bellissimo!”

 

--

 

Notes:

 

*Excerpt from Marcel Proust’s In Search of Lost Time

** Quote from Ernest Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises

*** Translation: “Well, you are pretty. I don’t lie.”

 

Songs responsible for this piece of : (Please do listen to them if you haven’t!)

 

Gone Away - Safetysuit

60 Seconds - Kim Sunggyu

What If - Safetysuit

1 Minute, 1 Second - Epik High ft. Taru

Story - KARA

Nostalgia - Brown Classics, Yozoh, Eric Nam (Baekhyun’s song)

 

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! I’m 21 today :D

 

Also, thank you to my fic buddy, Steph, for always listening to my rants about this story. (It’s her birthday too!)

To Roxanne for proof-reading even though she’s busy with job-hunting and vacation. *insert baekhyun’s finger hearts*

And to Lynn for making the poster! Even though she said it’s been a long time but it still turned out really beautiful ;__;

 

Thank you for reading! I hope you liked this story!