“Ugh.” My hand shot out to slam the alarm clock before I opened my eyes.

I rolled onto my side to see the time, 6:00am.

Too early.

I rubbed my face as I yawned and rolled onto my back again. I felt my elbow being pulled into something warm and looking over, I remembered why I wanted to be awake so early. 

My Fany was still very much asleep and clutching to my arm.  was parted slightly, lolling open and moving with every slow breath she took.  She looked so peaceful and beautiful that it took my breath away and I could my face soften as if I were looking at a pile of kittens. 

I lay there racking my brain and wondering why on earth I haven’t made time to watch Tiffany sleep before.  This hadn’t really been my intention, though.  By setting the alarm I just tried to buy us a few hours before the moving day.  I thought the alarm would wake her up too, but seeing her like this I didn’t really want to wake her up anymore.  How anyone could be so beautiful without being awake to know it blew my mind.  Tiffany is on another level.  Nobody even comes close.

I delicately push aside a small lock of her hair that was hanging, suspended across her face, and secure it behind her ear.  I pressed my lips to her smooth forehead and froze when I felt her stir.

She rolled onto her back and rubbed her nose without opening her eyes. Her arms landed in a heap above her head and she arched her back, lifting it completely off the bed for a moment to stretch.  A dissatisfied noise escaped her and then she was still again.

My smile could part the oceans.

I would only be so lucky to be able to witness this fascinating display on a daily basis.  I let my eyes adoringly roam down her body only to find that she’d kicked her covers off.  I immediately moved to pull them back up but my hand hovered over her stomach.  Her shirt was partially lifted and one of her hip bones was jutting out gloriously from underneath her pajama pants. 

All of the air left my lungs slowly and I found myself openly assessing my girlfriend’s flawless body that she unknowingly put on display for me.  I made sure she was still quite asleep before I let my index finger touch her.  I ran it along the defined line that went from her hip bones up to her abdomen and watched her face, making sure it wouldn’t wake her.

I traced her waist line up to her ribs and back down again, feeling her stomach rise against my fingertips with every breath.  Tiffany’s appeal, I thought, lay in these unrelenting curves; something I knew I lacked.  I wanted to experience her body in ways I’ve never experienced before.  I wanted to know what her stomach felt like against my lips… my tongue…

But looking at Tiffany like this also made me feel slightly insecure.  I knew she could have anyone she wanted…

She never told me how or why she happened to fall in love with me.

I turned my attention back to her peaceful face and wished so fervently that I could see what she was dreaming of.  I stared at her longingly until I heard the alarm clock come back to life loudly beside me.  I saw her eyes roll open lazily and look at me.  I frowned and hit the alarm, making sure to completely disable it, rather than hit the snooze again.

She smiled softly, raising a hand to wave at me as she inhaled deeply and stretched some more. 

“Were you watching me sleep?” She asked, just above a husky whisper.

I grinned and nodded.  She got up onto her elbows to lean over me and check the time.

“I thought we weren’t starting ‘til eight.” She whimpered and collapsed onto my shoulder.

I grinned up at the ceiling and let a hand fall into her hair.  “We aren’t.”

“Oh…” She said, nuzzling her face into my neck.  She slid her hand across my stomach, under my shirt, and it came to rest just below my .  Her lips found my neck and I let my eyes close.

A large part of me liked Tiffany’s idea of killing two hours, and I let it carry on for some time, letting her hand explore more and feeing her lips and teeth massage my neck and collar bone, but ultimately my curiosity got the better of me.

“Fany-ah, what were you dreaming about?” I whispered.

“Mm?” She murmured, the vibrations from her lips sent a chill down my body. 

“Y-Your dream, do you remember it?”

“…No Tae, I don’t.  Why? Was I talking?” She asked.

“No.  I was just curious.  Say, can I ask you something?” My eyes came open.

“Anything.” she said.

I stuck my tongue out of the corner of my mouth in thought.

Nope. There’s no easy way to ask this.

“Have you ever… had feelings for any of the other girls?”

She groaned. “Are you kidding me?  Are you still on about that dream?”

I grinned guiltily, “It’s just a question.”

She used her free hand to push herself up and look into my eyes. 

“The answer is no.  It always will be.  I’m not into Yuri.”

I bit my lip and smiled up at the ceiling, I couldn’t help finding her serious expression amusing.  She pushed my face to look at her. “I’m serious!” She said, getting louder.

“Shh…” I tried to calm her down.

“Are you into Jessi?” She asked.  Her eyebrows hovered high on her head dangerously.

“Of course not.” I laughed.

She sighed and cuddled against me again, saying in a small voice.  “I only love you, Tae.”

I rolled onto my side to stare into her eyes thoughtfully. 

“Why?” I asked

She looked taken aback by my question.

“What..?”

“Why do you love me?” I asked, keeping my eyes warm.

She stared at me for a while, speechless, before letting her eyes go unfocused.  I watched her thinking, and I realize how impressed I am with how she looks without makeup.  Tiffany was always such a natural beauty, even when we were younger. 

“I don’t have an answer.” She said finally.

“Oh?” I asked, smiling at the anticlimactic answer.

“There’s not just one answer, I’d have to write a book.” She nodded.

“Well,” I glanced over my shoulder, “I’ve got an hour and a half to kill…”

She sighed and looked into nothing again.  I waited patiently and let my hand roam across her stomach again, feeling empowered after earlier.

“Well, it started ages ago, didn’t it?” She muttered. “I was the new girl that couldn’t speak well.  I didn’t have friends or family… or anything.  I was lonely.”

I hung, on her every word, remembering that insecure girl she was describing.  Tiffany arrived in Korea as damaged goods.  For the most part when we started training together she kept to herself which may or may not have been her own choice.  It was hard to have a conversation with her with her knowing so few words. That, and all of her time was usually immersed in school work or learning Korean.

“And I ended up being your roommate.” She said.

I smiled a little. “It still felt like I lived alone though.”

“I didn’t want to be a burden to you.” She said.  “I felt like they gave me a roommate just so that it would have to be their job to teach me.”

“I didn’t see it that way.” I said.

“I know.” She said, “You were you different. You were the first person to really talk to me, to really try and be my friend.”

I smiled again.

“And when I finally started learning enough to talk more, we became really close, didn’t we?”

I nodded.

“You always seemed to know when to come in and see me, when I needed someone the most.” She said.

I could hear you cry.

I was transfixed on her, not sure I wanted to tell her that. 

Tiffany’s face broke into a gigantic smile before I could decide. “And you were so talented.  I was so jealous of your voice.  Little tiny Kim Taeyeon with the chubby cheeks that could belt it out louder than anyone there.”

“Yah! Chubby cheeks!?” I said indignantly, slightly sarcastic.  Yes, I knew I had them.

She reached up and pinched one of my cheeks. “Still got a little bit there.”

I smirked. "You had to know your voice was incredible, too."

“I thought it was okay," She said, "But you... You were so confident.  When we would be practicing our singing, you’d be working on your introduction.” She started laughing.

I shook my head.

“I’m Kim Taeyeon and I’m going to take over the world!” She rolled onto her back to laugh harder.

“Wow, I think we’re off topic.” I said, poking her in the stomach.

“Sorry.” She said, chuckling.

Her eyes lost focus again.

“Do you remember our first Christmas?”

Yes.  It was very hard for you. It was the first Christmas without her mother.  I spent the entire day with her instead of going home to my own family.

I nodded.

 “You got me that-“

“Pink bunny.” I finished, smiling.

She beamed.

“I felt so horrible because I couldn’t afford to get you anything.  You took me to the mall, gave me some money and told me to go get you something.”

Anything to make you feel better.

“Remember? I got those cheap little-“

“Friendship necklaces.”  I said, the corner of my mouth rising.

“You remember everything.” She said, looking overjoyed.

“I was there, I should.” I said, grinning.

She paused for a moment.

..

“Tae, do you remember when I got my first boyfriend?”

My smile disappeared. Her eyebrows rose.

“I’ve never seen you so mad before…” She said without waiting for me to answer.

I remember.

“’He’s such a loser, what are you thinking? You can do way better.  He’s dated almost every girl here already…’” She quoted me.

It’s true.

“He never debuted; I think he got kicked out for smoking.” I said.

Tiffany laughed. "You were so mean to him."

"I didn't like him very much, no." I said honestly.

“When I told you I kissed him you didn’t talk to me for a week.” She said.

That part I didn’t remember until she told me.  I froze in place.  There was an awkward silence and the mood dampened slightly.

“When I finally had enough I had to go into your room and get in bed with you, and even that didn’t work.  I wrapped my arms around you and threatened to never let go until you talked to me again.” She said softly.

I grimaced.  I was horrible to her throughout this ordeal.  I must have forced this out of my memory a long time ago.  Thinking about it now made me want to cry for being so mean to her.

“..But when I started crying you held me.” She said. 

I shouldn’t have made you cry in the first place.

What made me act that way?  Seeing her with that boy made me feel so uneasy.  He wasn’t really that bad of a guy, but when I found out he was dating Tiffany I instantly hated him.  When she told me she kissed him, it felt as though she’d just walked up and slapped me. The thought of her kissing that jerk still made my skin crawl... Because of him, I didn’t get to see her as often… When they broke up I felt so relieved…

You were jealous…

“Tae?” She asked.

“Yeah?” I said.

“Do you remember? That was the first night we slept together.” She said.

I nodded.  We moved into the same room after that.

“I think that’s the night I really started thinking of you as more than a friend...” She said softly.

That was at least five years ago.  To keep a secret that long would be unbearable.  I gazed at her, almost disbelieving.  In truth though, I might have felt the same way.  I just suppressed it. There was no doubt in my mind that what I felt for that boy back then was jealousy.  I feel the same way these days when some random male idol approaches her for an extended period of time. 

She took my face in her hands and squeezed my cheeks.

“I watched you grow into a swan before my very eyes.”

“I love you … so much.” I said lightly. 

She leaned in and kissed me sweetly and it felt like it have even more meaning than before, now that I heard her reasoning behind it.  It was electric...

She broke the kiss and smacked my , making me jump. “And I love you.  Let’s get this over with.” She got out of bed.

I looked over my shoulder, “We’ve still got twenty minutes.”

“Well…” Tiffany said, “We could either mess around now, or get all that stuff lugged up here and have more time to mess around later.”

“Mess around?” I asked, my eyes wide.

She laughed.  “I’ll leave that definition up to you.”

My feet were on the ground before she even finished her sentence.

I felt absolutely disgusting; every inch of my exposed skin was covered with a thin glaze of sweat.  I must have been up and down these stairs over a hundred times today, but finally this was the last box straight from Yuri’s room.  Jessica’s little sister, Krystal, who came over to help us move, was walking ahead of me carrying a very tall assortment of different sized boxes.  I wasn’t surprised in the least when I noticed that Yuri, out of all of us, has the most stuff. 

“Where do you want this, Unnie?” Krystal asked Jessica.

“This side of the room.” She pointed.

I set my box down beside Krystal’s load and doubled over, breathing deeply.

“That’s... that’s it.” I sighed.  Jessica came and clapped me on the back.

“Mission: success!” She held a fist in the air and walked me out into the kitchen where everyone else was.

My Fany had a tall glass of ice water waiting for me when I got there.  I sat beside her and drank half of it in one gulp.

It finally sounded like it was supposed to in the dorm again.  Nine girls talking at the same time whether the person they’re talking to is listening to them or not.  It felt like home again. 

My phone lit up on the counter in front Tiffany and she picked it up handing it to me. 

Amidst all the others talking, nobody else seemed to notice.  I read the message:

“Tomorrow, 9:15am, SM Headquarters, you have a meeting with the President. ~Yongjun”

I glanced up at Tiffany who read it over my shoulder.  She wasn’t breathing.

I read the message again, in shock, and stood, taking Tiffany’s hand and leading her to our room.

“Oh my god.” She said.  “W-What’s going to happen?”

I didn’t know what to say.  Was tomorrow really going to be my last day with SM entertainment?  It was a definite possibility.

Sunny knocked on the door frame.

“Chicken’s her- what’s wrong?” Her tone immediately changed when she saw my face. I might have found that comical if things weren’t so serious right now… and if I didn’t already know Sunny.

She looked between me and Tiffany, and I handed her my cell phone, lifelessly.  She read it a few times before handing it back.

“I guess that means Yongjun knows what we did, huh?” She asked. “Wow, the President...”

She wasn’t really helping. I already knew how bad this was.

“If you leave I’m coming with you.” Tiffany vowed.  Sunny dove onto her stomach on my bed and pulled out her cell phone. 

“Stay for the Sones.” I said sadly to Tiffany.  “It’s about them anyways.  That’s why we do all this right?  That’s what I’m most sad about…”

She shook her head.  “I’ll be traveling all the time; we’ll never get to see each other.”

I hadn’t thought about that… but I could never ask her to quit for me.

“SNSD would fall apart if they lost both of us.” I said, frowning.  Tiffany looked like she was going to cry.

“Ahjussi!!” Sunny yelled with so much aegyo I almost fell over.  Her cell phone was at her ear.

Ahjussi? Surely… she didn’t just call…

“What do you mean you know why I’m calling?”

She rolled onto her stomach and looked up at me, winking. I fell to my knees at her ankles.

Sunny.  Lee Soon Kyu. Niece of Lee Soo Man, President of SM entertainment.

I can’t even wrap my head around this.  We all know who she is but it’s not something we talk about regularly.  She doesn’t mention him often.

“Taeyeon?” She asked, sounding truly clueless.  “Uncle, I’m just calling because I was wondering about Christmas arrangements.” She said.  I looked at her strangely.

“Your house? Okay.  Yeah, that’s strange I didn’t get the notice.  But what’s this about Taeyeon, Uncle?”

“Have I noticed anything strange with her?  Stranger than normal?” Sunny laughed naturally.

“Taeyeon and Tiffany?” She gasped. “Wow, really?! Well if they are then they kept it a really good secret from us.”

Tiffany and I gaped at one another.

“No, we didn’t know.” She said, getting to her feet. “But why would it be a problem? They’re a fan favorite.”

“Yeah, they’re the most popular pairing; the fans have put them together since the very beginning.  You’ve heard of Taeny right?”  Sunny went to my closet and took out one of my jackets, pointing first at it then herself. I nodded.

“Uncle, are you free? Let’s get dinner, I’ll tell you all about it.” She put my jacket on and walked out my door.  Tiffany and I both followed her silently to the front door, everyone else got quiet when they saw Sunny on the phone.

“You have a meeting with her?” She asked. “Surely, you weren’t going to give her trouble for this, right?” She asked, opening the front door.

“The fans love them.” She turned around to smile at me, “And obviously if they kept it a secret from us who live with them, if it’s real it won’t go public.”

…

“Okay, I’ll meet you there in 15 minutes.” She said, leaving and pulling the front door closed with her.

“Who was that?” Jessica asked.

I just continued staring at the door.

She waved a hand in front of my face.

No response.

“Sunny’s… going to dinner with her uncle.” Tiffany said blankly.

Impossible.

After everything we’ve gone through could it really be this easy?