Case #08: Pipe Like A Lorna

Taming of the 22nd Floor Screwball

Mondays usually meant 120 hours of weekly programing until Saturday. Then show cycles take a break; Taehyung kicks back a movie or 20. It’s Wednesday, and he’s missed 48 hours of new references. “It’s called a lifestyle change,” he explained.

Bringing Jimin along for moral support was — in hindsight’s wisdom — a mistake of certain proportions. “What style is in this season?” the so-called best friend jeered. “Identity crisis at 27-years-old?” 

“I can’t practice the art of park bench-sitting?” Taehyung stuttered like a person who stutters. 

“No,” Jimin agreed, eyes squinting under the morning sun’s scrutiny. “You don’t go Piper Chapman when you’re Lorna Morello.” Habitual reflexes tempted Taehyung to knock his softball out of the park. Insert other baseball metaphors: real world stuff.

“Why not?” Taehyung fought back. “They say life is spontaneous; I’m waiting for something to happen to me.” Jimin wasn’t convinced by shoddy research.

“Who’s this ‘they?’ Name the close-minded individual who told you to change.” He started sounding like Anna — unreasonably reasonable. “Keep talking like this and I’ll make you hold my pocket.” 

Maybe Taehyung was the second-counting, Earth 2, yellow, screwball Regina Phalange of Hell’s Tatooine. Fear masked jealousy for the easy-going Supernatural fan. In the hour spent watching clouds go by, waiting, he forgot Anna never stopped doing. The strange, the crazy, the spontaneous: her.

“In your expert opinion, is season four worth a Netflix subscription?” he asked.

“Daredevil started up again,” Jimin added a metaphorical box of red hair dye to the pot.

Taehyung rushed off, shouting, “I’ll call you in approximately 13 hours!” 

“No more bench-sitting, Taehyung Kim! I will cut you!” Jimin yelled back. “Inside joke,” he insisted to the neighborhood’s elderly jogging squad.

Serial TV-binger Taehyung had 56 hours of content to catch up on. Teetering on impatient toes, he watched the floors go by. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. Two men got on at 10. A cough masked Taehyung’s finger pressing 13. 

Du-du-du-du, du-du-du-du.

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Author's Thoughts
lilyemc
[SCREWBALL] That's all, folks! Let me know what you thought w/ a comment! Don’t forget to spare an upvote for this humble wright.
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Jasinda98 #1
Pleasantly confused
Vip83bb #2
Chapter 9: Lol I loved the Supernatural chap.
Exocution #3
Chapter 2: OmF, What is this abouuutt, hhuhuhuhuuu.. :c I don't understand none of these damn references! UMF, I'm an idiot, ya'll..
chibijaejae #4
OMFG will I ever be able to understand this story without knowing all the references? LOL I apologize in advance for my pathetic existence. OTL
Sharissa #5
Chapter 4: Its si damn rare to find someone as weird as Anna for Taehyung as originally Taehyung is the weird one ( usually) in a good way of course
niangniang #6
omg wow when i read through the mentioned references that would be made into this story, i admit i began t o grow curious about what taehyung would be like but when i saw bbc sherlock there you had me xD im totally looking forward to this! /grins at the sherlock poster in my room/
InfiniteWisdom #7
Chapter 9: Oooooooooooohhhh. This whole story is in refence to Shakespeare's "Taming of the Shrew." :0 I'd never heard of it until I googled the name Katherina :0 Mind blown. I guess I'm just that ignorant. Anyhow, that was sweet. And cute. I like what this story was. Definitely earned its "slice of life" tag in my opinion. That last line loses me a bit, I'm not quite sure what Anna is insinuating by calling someone else Katherina. Maybe that by her influence Tae has now become the screwball/shrew? In any case, congrats on another completed story. And a fun little one at that.
InfiniteWisdom #8
Chapter 8: Well I certainly got the plethora of references at the end, which makes me happy (didn't know the ladies you named near the beginning, though). Daredevil season 2 was worth the watch for sure. So Tae's realizing how much he's becoming like gurl. That's kinda awesome in a friendship way. Can't believe there's only one chap left after this.
InfiniteWisdom #9
Chapter 7: Oh dude, Star Wars chap the sequel. Also interesting twist near the end there. All Anna and Tae needed was the power of friendship to become closer. I appreciate how calm and understanding Anna seemed. Although I guess when you think about it she always acts like she's calm and collected. Even when she starts talking nonsense, she can make people question whether it's she (Anna) that's crazy, or everyone else that's crazy and she's the sane one. Could be the confident attitude she projects. Oooor maybe what I'm saying doesn't make sense. I could be crazy :0
InfiniteWisdom #10
Chapter 6: My my, Supernatural convention chapter with references abound. Today I learned about Metatron, whose lore I'd never really looked into. I imagine he's also involved in the show somehow and that's why he's mentioned here, but I wouldn't know of such things. And yet this still inspired me to learn a lil about angel lore, so that's cool.
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