Chapter 1: I'm seriously crying a river right now! T.T WHY?! They were so cute!!

Chapter 1: Btw the style is ok hee-jin!
(Lol because it's similar to mine so if i say it's bad then i'll be saying my own writing is bad huhhehehe jkjkjkjk seriously it's good, i love it)
It fits the angst so nicely

Chapter 1: This is cute and sad at the same time!
Makes my heart giddy... And warm...
Aaaaah i can imagine this happening at the central station xp and the coffee came from that to go store we went to (is it albert heejin?? XD because i remember the last part is like heijn or something..)
It's so sad??? But i don't know it's like... Soft pastel sad
I was afraid you will kill hee-jin (kill yourself??) with like a cliche disease or cancer or something... But the hit ans run makes it shocking and tragic aww i'm sad...
The part where he listened to their recordings especially... Painful T^T and is that the going to the toilet joke that we made up??
I love it!! And awww im shipping xiuhee so hard right now xD

Chapter 1: noooooooo heejinniee died?????????? andwaee!! TT
oh my its sad.. why??? could've be happy ending.. lets rise heejin once again xD
who ever hit and run i will them and grill them ---__--- POOR MINSEOK!

Chapter 1: Im going to read this seriously once i recharge... Tomorrow!!

Chapter 1: She died??? NOOOOOOOO
It's so cute!!
Only History lol xD
It was a hit and run? He didn't even stop (why do I assume some guy ran her over, maybe it was a girl xD)
I thought she was ill or something, that that was why Hyun Mi was so protective...
It was cute~~
(It was supossed to be sad, though? I'm sorry I just kept awww'ing)

Somehow, the flow of some sentences seemed off to me... (I'm sorry) so I had to re-read them to make sure I got them (which is why it took me longer to read xD)



Some mistakes (but I think there were a few more >.<; I just wrote down the obvious/confusing ones)
--
were lighted up - were lit up
surrounded by .. people, although
not wrong per se, but why two times train station in this sentence?
How lame it was, the girl giggled in response. -> no matter how lame
held her hand in hers and l - held her hand in his?
Not to forget the pink glow on her cheeks - as well as? (I think you directly translated from dutch: niet te vergeten haar...?)
"But what if this a chance?" - if this is a chance
was added with fuel it seemed since he met Hee-Jin - had been fuelled?
He was through. -> he made it through? He passed? now it looks like he's done... over... instead of passing?
perform and passed -> preform and pass or Preform and he passed
Minseok was never as happy as this. - Minseok had never been as happy
, he was fixed on being first place. - he was aiming for first place/ he was fixated on being first place
food bars -> food stalls? Now it's like it's like candy bars or something?