“Hey!” Seunghyun greeted Youngbae brightly, planting a little peck on his cheek. He didn't even flinch anymore, he thought happily. He had developed the habit of kissing him every time they met. Well, unless there was an audience of course, but there rarely was. They pretty much lived and breathed that tiny little studio. After Youngbae had decided to tutor him permanently, he turned professional, throwing him into the deep end without so much as a life ring in sight. They had practice every day, sometimes twice a day, and he had even drawn up a special dietary plan for him. He had basically hijacked his life. He didn't mind though. The only thing he was worried about was whether Youngbae was getting enough practice time for himself. He was a student too, and even though he was the most talented guy he had ever seen, he too had to work hard to reach his goals. And his goals were no ordinary goals, sky was the limit. Seunghyun would hate himself if he got in the way of him reaching them. Still, he couldn't find it in him to mention it. Maybe he was just a crappy, selfish person at heart.

“You're late....again!” Youngbae complained, but there was no bite to his bark. He seemed to be in a good mood.

“Two minutes!! And it's 5 AM! We ended at midnight last night!” he whined. He knew he should be exhausted, and physically he was, but there was so much energy created between them when they danced together that it kept him going and he kept coming back. At this rate they would be able to solve the world's energy crisis in no time, just the two of them.

“Late is late.” Youngbae shrugged, a teasing smirk stuck to his lips. “Let's get started! No time like the present.”

Two hours later they had to stop to get ready for class. Just as well, Seunghyun's body had stopped responding to his brain's commands. It had gone on a strike, demanding better working conditions and he couldn't blame it.

“Good session.” Youngbae grinned satisfied, his eyes disappearing into that all too charming eye-smile of his. Then without warning, he took off his drenched shirt in one swift move. Seunghyun's heart did a double take. Chocolate abs that went on for hours. The glistening sweat that decorated his elegantly chizzled muscles called to him, daring him to dry it all off using nothing but his tongue. He wanted to accept the dare, he wanted to so badly that it took all his strength to restrain himself. He couldn't ruin the trust he had finally managed to build between them. Usually they used separate changing rooms and Youngbae had been very careful not to do anything suggestive around him, which in truth had offended him. He had acted as if he was some feral animal, unable to control himself around him. Now he was starting to think he had a point.

It was that awful diet he had him on, he wasn't even allowed to drink. How was he going to unwind without alcohol? So the only thing he had to distract himself with was , but how was he supposed to pick up guys without alcohol?!? He had never even tried it before. It was too awkward, he couldn't do it. So he was starved in all senses of the word. No food, no alcohol, no tail. It was no wonder he was having trouble keeping his body in check around Youngbae. It was like dangling a steak in front of a starving dog. It was a simple reflex. Survival instinct.

“What's up?” Youngbae stared at him with suspicious X-ray eyes.

“Nothing. Nothing.” he cleared his throat as he picked up his stuff and got the hell out of there.

“You're laaate. You missed warm-up.” Jiyong warned him.

“Yeah, seems to be the theme of the day.” he sighed.

“No worries, I covered for ya. The TA is totally into me.” Jiyong gave him a playful wink.

“Ah, mate, you're seriously the greatest that ever lived.” he exaggerated thankfully.

“You know it! And it gets better.” he handed him a USB stick.

“What's this?” he asked surprised as he quickly stowed it away in his bag before the teacher who had just walked in could see it.

"Youngbae mentioned you wanted it. It's only for personal use, mind you. No uploading it, I'm trusting you with my baby." he warned him semi-seriously.

"No way! Awesome! Absolutely love this song. Hey, I didn't know you guys were friends. Wait, that means you were the one that composed..." he looked at him in surprise, awe in his eyes. Was there nothing he couldn't do? Why was Seunghyun the only one that wasn't gifted at every single art form possible? He felt a bit useless.

Jiyong shrugged coolly, as if he owned the world, and then chuckled dorkily as he sprang up in reaction to the teacher starting the class.

Seunghyun was walking on cloud nine, his feet barely touching the ground. When he woke up groggy and sleep deprived this morning, every muscle in his body refusing to do its job and get him out of bed, he had no idea the day was going to turn out so brilliantly. Not only had Jiyong hidden an extra track on the USB, another amazing collaboration with Youngbae he couldn't wait to listen to over and over again, but the dance teacher had actually paid him a complement. Sort of. He had said he hadn't completely , with genuine surprise. All that extra practice was clearly paying off. He couldn't wait to tell Youngbae. He wondered if he would be proud of him, for some reason he really wanted him to be. He wanted him to know how thankful he was, but he didn't have the courage to just come right out and say it.

At that same moment, as if fate had called him, Youngbae appeared around the corner at the end of the hall. Their eyes met. Seunghyun's stomach twisted in surprise, releasing a couple of butterflies from their imprisonment. He waved to him enthusiastically, unconsciously hastening his pace. He was burning to talk to him. As Youngbae's girlfriend joined his side, Youngbae grabbed her wrist and did an abrupt U-turn, returning to where they had just came from without even acknowledging his existence, disappearing from view.

Seunghyun just stood there, feeling as if he had been hit by a truck. Why hadn't he waved back? But he already knew the answer. Youngbae didn't want anyone to see that he was associating with someone that was gay. He felt like a leper. A dirty little secret. Being gay wasn't a disease, he wasn't contagious. He had been openly gay for long enough to have encountered his fair share of discrimination and ignorance. He had become pretty good at letting it glide off of him like he was a non-stick pan, flipping the insults back where they came from like a juicy pancake. But when the source was so close to home, it was impossible to pretend it didn't hurt him. Youngbae had just stuck a big knife into his back and it hurt like hell.

After wandering aimlessly through the streets of Seoul, his feet brought him to the club. He sat at the bar and ordered a big, fat drink to get back at Youngbae and his stupid nutrition plan, but ended up just staring at it. He hadn't felt so lonely in years. He could feel the old self-hatred stirring somewhere deep down in his gut, surprised to find it still residing there. He thought he was over all this.

“What did that drink ever do to you?” Wookie came over, pretending to have to rearrange something behind the bar just where Seunghyun was sitting, but he knew it was for his benefit. Wookie was a good friend.

Seunghyun just shrugged. He wasn't in the mood for a heart to heart. His heart was busy tending to its bleeding wounds.

“So... what did he do?” Wookie prodded, not letting Seunghyun brood in peace.

“Who?” he responded with great reluctance.

“The guy, obviously.” Wookie chuckled, making sure to keep the conversation light, but he could feel he was trying to be sensitive without it showing.

“The STRAIGHT guy!” Seunghyun spat, pushing the glass further away, as if that would make his thoughts about Youngbae go away too.

“No... ah.... Seunghyun-ah... not again, not after Dae...” Wookie's eyes turned sad. Seunghyun couldn't stand his sympathy, so he stood up and went to the dance floor to pick up a random stranger with whom to drown his sorrows. But it didn't work. He had never tried to pick up a guy sober before, and as predicted, it was way too awkward. It made his skin crawl, it was probably trying to escape from his body. He would escape it too if he only could.

He spotted Seungri in the crowd. He was on fire, dancing with a drop dead gorgeous guy that was way out of his league, but somehow he had him eating out of his hand. It looked like a done deal. He wanted to turn around and walk away to give Seungri some space to do his thing, he deserved someone who could give him everything he wanted. Attention, endless attention. But he couldn't do it. He walked straight up to him, grabbed his wrist and pulled him away with him. Seungri didn't even resist, he just waved goodbye to the guy he was with and followed him willingly. Seunghyun felt bad, he knew he was being selfish, but he felt more sorry for himself. He needed a distraction.

He took Seungri back to his place and had his way with him. It helped, for a short moment. For a split second he could pretend everything was alright, that he didn't care about Youngbae nor how homophobic he was acting. But then the moment was over. Sweaty and exhausted, he rolled off of Seungri and onto the bed, catching his breath.

“Wow, that was... unusually energetic.” Seungri giggled as he snuggled up to him. He didn't feel like snuggling, but couldn't really push him away.

“What's wrong?” Seungri asked, sensing something was up.

“Nothing.” he said dryly, breaking free from the hug and rolling on his side, away from Seungri. He closed his eyes, and there they were. Youngbae's eyes, looking right into his, before coldly turning away and disappearing into the darkness, leaving him all alone.