I can’t begin to tell you how happy I was when I got those callbacks. The first thing I thought about was texting Taehyung, but he'd already beat me to it. He texted me telling me that he passed. We agreed to meet up that night and grab dinner in celebration. After that second callback, it became a tradition, going out to some nice resturaunt to celebrate major accomplishments. It ate up a good chunk of our paychecks-or more specifically mine-but it was something to look forward to in the weeks to come. We wouldn’t have those sweet moments for long.

    “I...I don’t believe it...” Jimin stared at the email in complete bewilderment. He felt detached from his body, like it wasn’t really him reading an acceptance letter from Big Hit Entertainment telling him that he, Park Jimin, out of a hundred and seventy applicants, had been chosen to participate in their trainee program. But there it was, company CEO Bang Shihyuk's digital signature signed at the bottom of the email. Jimin’s breathing intensified as the gravity of his situation became apparent. There was no going back. This was it. They wanted him coming in and discussing the contract. If he chose this road, he would be stuck with it. No more easy days of chatting up old ladies in the convenience store, no more consoling little kids who fell on their butts during dance class, no more late nights with Taehyung in the studio harmonizing to popular american pop tunes, no more silliness and laughing off mistakes. This would be the start of his career. Strangely, the thought didn’t upset him like he thought it would. It made him smile with accomplishment and beam with pride. He was right, this was the start of his career. Jimin sat back down at his desk and pulled his laptop closer to him. Mumbling out the words, Jimin typed out his response, saying that he would make the monday morning meeting to discuss his contract. He agreed to determining when he would be moving into the dorms, what his schedule would be from now own, etc. After hitting send, Jimin pushed himself away from his desk and spun in a circle.

    “Yes...Yes...Yes, yes, yes, yes!” Jimin shouted and fist-pumped the air. He practically lunged for his phone on the couch. He had to call Taehyung. The phone rang four times before Taehyung’s gravely voice came through the receiver.

    “Hello?” Taehyung asked. He sounded like he had just woken up. Jimin turned to his clock. It was six in the afternoon.

    “Please tell me you weren’t sleeping just now.” Jimin laughed as he was met with a set of grumbling followed by some crashing sounds.

    “Stupid woman. Why does she leave this crap all over the place?...Whaddya say chim chim?” Taehyung asked. Whatever he had been doing must have quieted down. Jimin pulled his knees to his chest and bit his lip.

    “Nevermind. Hey, you checked your email yet?” Jimin waited on the other end as he heard a door opening and closing and a whining sound as if Taehyung had just sat down on an old chair. Jimin heard the chime that signaled the computer coming to life before quiet ensued once again. Jimin heard Taehyung’s murmured words as he checked his inbox. Jimin knew he had come to the email from Big Hit when there was complete silence on the other end. Jimin held his breath in anticipation.

    “...Holy .” Taehyung whispered into the receiver. Jimin waited with baited breath.

    “I’m a ing trainee now.” Taehyung answered in disbelief and burst into giddy laughter. Jimin mirrored that same excitement and jumped up from his chair. He couldn’t believe it. They both got in. After a few moments of adrenaline filled euphoria, Taehyung remembered his friend on the other line.

    “What about you Jimin?” Taehyung asked nervously. He’d hate to be so ecstatic if his friend didn’t receive the same kind of positive news. Jimin sighed into the phone and twirled a strand of hair on his head.

    “This ...” Jimin whined into the phone. Taehyung’s heart dropped.

    “You didn’t get in...” Taehyung stated. Jimin sighed louder this time.

    “Now I’ll never get any work done! Can you imagine if we were in the same dorm? Oh no this isn’t going to work. Big Hit’s gonna have a big handful with us two running around.” Taehyung’s sadness morphed into joy and he screamed into the phone.

    “Holy ! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! We’re ing Big Hit trainees! Oh my Gaawwwwwwwwwwd!” Jimin had to hold the phone an arms length away just to protect his hearing, but even he couldn’t keep the giddiness out of him and started dancing around his apartment.

    “Haha! I can’t believe it. We are just one step closer to our future. We’re so close Tae-tae...so close...” Jimin fell back on his bed in disbelief. Grabbing his pillow and muffling his mouth, Jimin screamed into it to try and dispel the adrenaline pumping through his body. It worked a little bit.

    “Chim-chim, I literally can’t stop smiling right now. My mouth hurts.” Taehyung laughed and fell down back-first onto his floor. He stared at the ceiling in wonder.

    “I know Tae, I’m right there with you.” After years of living in fear that this was a mistake, that he had made the wrong decision, he was getting reassurance. His dad had always thought Jimin wouldn’t make it, but look at him now. He was getting somewhere! It was right there in front of him, he just had to reach out and take it.

    “When do you think we’ll debut?” Taehyung asked. Jimin remained silent in thought.

    “I don’t know Tae. I haven’t thought that far. Some people wait years before they debut. Others wait a year or two.” Taehyung to his side and played with the carpet.

    “I hope we debut quickly.” Taehyung whispered. Jimin turned over onto his side and clutched his pillow to his chest.

    “I hope so too.” Jimin repeated.

    Big Hit had taken in twenty-two new trainees. That seemed like a lot at the time, but when I'd started my training up, it made sense. You see, the company offers most trainees a two to four year contract in which they monitor their progress and prepare them for the intention of debut. It’s more often than not that unexpected developments occur, people drop out, or the company has other things to deal with in their current groups that impedes their ability to take on and maintain trainees. They are heavily staffed with coaches and instructors, so one would think that most training would be institutionalized. I was surprised to find that a good chunk of my day was spent in self-training. Two and a half hours of the day was given to each trainee to work on something personal to them. Based on what we needed to work on, we would pick and reserve practice rooms, studios, or open planning rooms. Once we did, from time to time they would send in someone to check up on us and take note of our progress. At first, these rooms that people booked-and the rooms that we had our group training in-were full of people and always busy. Then as time moved on, it became less and less busy. I noticed that trainees that'd already been there for a while were being weeded out. When those two to four year contracts would come up, people wouldn’t resign. I was one of the few that was offered a one year training contract along with Taehyung and five other trainees. There were people who I had met my first year there that had been there three years and as soon as their contract was up, they were gone. Now that I noticed how so many people gave up their contracts because of how labor intensive and difficult it was, it seemed perfectly justifiable to take on twenty-some trainees, because most of them wouldn’t even make it to debuting anyway.

    But don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t the company’s fault. Being a performer is difficult and time-consuming. It takes endless hours of practice and perfection. I was fortunate enough to not be in school during my time there or have any significant commitments to others, outside of my relationship with Taehyung. These two were the main reasons most people ended up quitting. They couldn’t maintain their school life, personal life, or family life while still being a trainee. There just simply wasn’t enough time. I was a part-time trainee so I would work half the day, then spent the other half at the company's dorms, studios, or training areas. I spent two hours in group sessions for dance, then another two hours for small group sessions in vocals. Then I had my personal training time for two and a half hours. We did a variety of activities and I met many different trainees, but most of the them were full-timers. Nearly their entire day was about training. They spent most of the morning and afternoon learning about different aspects of entertainment and learning how to do certain things like composing music, working a sound booth, acting out plays, or creating dance routines. Then the other half of their day went into personal training just like mine except it was more in depth and run with instructors.

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