Chapter Ten: The Compromise

Ji Hyo’s hands trembled ever so slightly as she sat in the limousine with the rest of the Running Man cast. She hated crowds. Press conferences had always been the worst part of shooting for a drama in her opinion, and now for the 2010 SBS Entertainment Awards, she would have to walk through the crowd of reporters, photographers, and other celebrities, answering interview questions and posing for pictures. Ji Hyo felt like she was about to be sick on the floor of the limo. She took a deep breath to calm herself.

Kwang Soo sat on her left and looked as nervous as she felt, pale white and stammering every other word. Jae Suk sat on her right, but he looked as calm and collected as ever. After all, Ji Hyo thought, Jae Suk had won awards from all three major television stations before. Jong Kook, too, had the same comfortable air about him; he had already won all three daesangs from each of the stations for his song “Loveable” in 2   005. Even Haha, who had won awards for Infinity Challenge, and Suk Jin, who had received awards from KBS in the past, looked relaxed. Ji Hyo envied their experience. Right then, she would give anything to possess the same calm, cheerful manner.

She tried to listen as Jong Kook and Jae Suk talked about the rivalry of sorts that had formed between Jae Suk and Kang Ho Dong, another popular MC. Even if she had something to add to the discussion, Ji Hyo didn’t think she could get the words out. Besides, she and Jong Kook were still having a silent argument over their teamwork.

It had started after their stay at Alpensia Ski Resort, where he’d told her that he wanted to be friends with her therefore they shouldn’t risk creating a love line between them by working together. Ji Hyo hadn’t said anything at the time—she’d been too shocked to speak. Instead, she’d suffered learning how to snowboard. She had to admit, Jong Kook had been a patient teacher. While she and Kwang Soo had fell down the slope, trying to maneuver their snowboards, Jong Kook had calmly explained over and over again, demonstrating as needed and offering encouraging words. The only time Jong Kook lost his temper was when Kwang Soo had said he’d never be able to snowboard.

It was the next day, when she woke up black and blue and barely able to move, that Ji Hyo thought about what Jong Kook had said to her on the ski lift. Was she supposed to be flattered that he liked her and wanted to be friends with her? Or should she be offended that he’d said that they shouldn’t work together on camera? But the only time they spent together was when they were filming. So was he saying that he liked her but didn’t want to be friends with her? Did he not want a love line with her that badly?

So, in response to Jong Kook not wanting to be on her team, she had picked him to be on her team the next episode. He’d been furious with her, of course, but only through silence. They were being filmed and there were guests present, so Jong Kook had smiled and laughed through filming—glaring at her only when the cameras couldn’t catch it. When he’d tried to talk to her about her decision, Ji Hyo had deliberately ignored him, which resulted in Jong Kook ignoring her throughout the next film shoot.

When the cameras were on, Jong Kook had no problem laughing and joking with her and sending her compliments. During the filming for episode twenty-five, Ji Hyo had almost been fooled into thinking Jong Kook had forgiven her and was willing to work together from then on. But the moment the cameras were turned off, the silent war between them returned.

Both Jae Suk and Joong Ki had asked her about it, but Ji Hyo couldn’t find the words to explain. She was both flattered and insulted by Jong Kook’s words on the ski lift, and she didn’t know how to explain her mixed emotions to anyone. Besides, she had the feeling that she and Jong Kook were both acting like five-year-old brats, and if she told anyone about it, she was fairly certain that she’d die of embarrassment.

The limousine hit a bump in the road, and Ji Hyo almost fell off her seat. Kwang Soo caught hold of her wrist to steady her. Ji Hyo sat back, tugging on the skirt of her white dress. She glanced up and saw that the rest of her cast mates were watching her curiously. Ji Hyo quickly looked away.

She had never seen her cast mates all dressed up before. Jae Suk seemed so serious in a navy blue suit, while Kwang Soo looked awkward in a gray three-piece suit and glasses. Jong Kook, as always, looked painfully handsome. Ji Hyo would have thought the argument between her and Jong Kook would have caused her crush on him to fade, but here she was, trying not to stare at him in a crisp, black tuxedo. Sitting next to Jong Kook were Haha, dressed in all black, and Suk Jin, who was wearing a suit with what Ji Hyo called his “old man glasses”. Gary and Joong Ki sat side by side at the far end of the limo, both wearing little bowties.

Ji Hyo frowned at her dongsaeng. Joong Ki had been acting strange for the past couple weeks. It was as if he was trying to keep his distance, though Ji Hyo couldn’t imagine why. Maybe Joong Ki wanted to avoid a love line with her as well; it could cause him to lose some of his more ardent female fans. But Ji Hyo had thought that Joong Ki cared about her more than that. They were good friends. They had looked after one another during the early days of Running Man. She couldn’t believe that a few fans could make Joong Ki keep his distance like this.

Human beings were frustrating, Ji Hyo thought. It seemed as if she had spent the last few weeks trying to figure out what her cast mates were thinking. Did they like her? Did they dislike her? Were they mad at her? Or mad at each other? Had she done something wrong? No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t understand them.

“Noona,” said Kwang Soo, his voice thick with nerves. “We’re here.”

“Oh.” Ji Hyo swallowed and stared at her knees. Her coordinator had shown her a variety of dresses that she could wear to the SBS Entertainment Awards. After much debate, Ji Hyo had allowed her coordinator to convince her to wear a little white dress which hung off the shoulders and displayed her legs. Ji Hyo would have been lying if she said that Jong Kook hadn’t been at the back of her mind when she selected that dress. However, he had barely glanced in her direction since the Running Man cast had met up that night in the SBS building. He’d smiled politely and greeted her when she’d first arrived, but that was all. The silence between them had returned, and Ji Hyo was beginning to wish she’d chosen a more comfortable dress or, even better, jeans and a jacket.

The limo came to a stop. Through the tinted windows, Ji Hyo could see the red carpet and crowds of people. There were cameras flashing and people calling out in loud voices. Ji Hyo’s heart was thundering in her chest.

The door opened and Kwang Soo stepped out of the limo. He turned and held out a hand to help Ji Hyo, which she took gladly as she slid out of the car. It would be terrible to trip over her heels and fall on her face in front of all these people and cameras.

As soon as she was standing on her own two feet, Ji Hyo dropped Kwang Soo’s hand and stood to the side as the other Running Man members exited the limo. Jae Suk, then Jong Kook and Haha, then Suk Jin and Gary, and lastly Joong Ki. Ji Hyo waited until both her dongsaengs were beside her before starting the walk down the red carpet after the rest of the cast.

Most of the interview and photograph sessions were a blur to Ji Hyo. She’d been to press conferences for movie releases before, but this was on a different scale. There were other celebrities on the red carpet. Ji Hyo spotted Jo Hye Ryun and Lee Seung Gi, while Jae Suk, Haha, and Jong Kook stopped to talk to Kang Ho Dong of Star King and Strong Heart. They also had to greet Shin Bong Sun, who joked about her love line with Jong Kook. Ji Hyo laughed with the rest of the cast and tried not to take Bong Sun seriously. It was harder to do than she thought.

Eventually, the cast reached the main stage of the red carpet. They climbed the steps, jostling each other and trying to work out a standing order. Jae Suk was first, followed by Joong Ki and Suk Jin. Ji Hyo quickly took the spot by Suk Jin, wanting to stand next to someone she was comfortable with—she didn’t want to get caught in one of her love lines tonight. She was afraid her nerves would cause her to openly reject Gary.

To her horror, Jong Kook was pushed into the spot next to her with the Two Kids on his left and Kwang Soo on the end, towering over the rest of them. Ji Hyo clasped her hands together and tried to focus on the interviewer in front of her. It didn’t help much. Even if she wasn’t looking at him, she was still aware of Jong Kook’s presence. His broad shoulders and firm stance were hard to ignore.

“Smile for the camera,” muttered Jong Kook through his own grin.

Ji Hyo blinked and tried to smile, but too late, she missed the camera’s flash. She probably looked panicked in the photo.

“You were blanked out,” said Suk Jin under his breath as the interviewer began asking questions.

Jong Kook opened his mouth, as if to say something, but then stopped.

Ji Hyo tried not to blush. She’d blanked out because she’d been trying not to think about him, and here he was continuing to ignore her.

The interviewer’s questions were mostly for Jae Suk, so Ji Hyo only had to stand there and smile politely. Jong Kook interjected occasionally with his own comments and jokes, and Kwang Soo and Gary answered questions about what it felt like to work on a variety show compared to making music and acting in dramas.

Suddenly the interviewer turned to Ji Hyo and asked, “Should we expect to see more progress between you and Gary next year?”

Ji Hyo wished they could ask her about something else. She had plenty to say about the games or the staff, but instead she was asked about her love line. She gulped and said, “Gary-oppa and I are still coming to understand one another. We will work hard next year too.”

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Suk Jin nodding as if to say “Good job.” At least she had managed to say something coherent.

“Should we do a ‘fighting’ pose?” asked the photographer.

The Running Man cast lifted up their fists and plastered smiles on their faces.

“Running Man, fighting!” cried Jae Suk as the camera flashed.

Then with the interviews and pictures over, the cast left the stage and entered the auditorium where the award ceremony would take place. Ji Hyo breathed a sigh of relief.

“You remembered the smile the second time, right?” asked Suk Jin as the cast was led to their table in the auditorium.

Each of the tables in the front section were reserved for one of SBS’s major programs—Inkigayo, Good Sunday,  Running Man, Strong Heart, Star King, Star Junior Show, 1000 Song Challenge…the list went on and on. The shows’ producers, PDs, and such were then placed at tables in the back section of the auditorium. When she looked over her shoulder, Ji Hyo could see that Cho, Kim, and Myuk PDs were already seated.

Ji Hyo was shocked to see that Running Man’s table was in the front row. It spoke to the success of their program that they were given such a place. Jae Suk and Jong Kook sat at opposite ends of the table. Haha and Gary took the seats next to Jong Kook, while Suk Jin occupied the empty seat beside them. Joong Ki moved to sit next to Jae Suk, and Kwang Soo followed him, but before Joong Ki could sit down, Ji Hyo slid into the chair, in effect forcing Joong Ki to take the seat next to her. Ji Hyo tried not to smirk in triumph; Joong Ki couldn’t avoid her forever.

Joong Ki shifted uncomfortably in his seat, glancing across the table and up at the stage—doing pretty much everything he could not to look at Ji Hyo.

“Why are you doing this?” asked Ji Hyo under her breath. Kwang Soo glanced at them, but apparently none of the other Running Man members had heard. Jae Suk was talking to Kang Ho Dong, who was seated at the table next to theirs, and Jong Kook, Gary, Haha, and Suk Jin were talking about presenters.

“Doing what, noona?” Joong Ki frowned, but Ji Hyo knew it was an act. She had spent enough time with Joong Ki and Kwang Soo to know when they were in their actor modes and when they were being genuine.

“Please don’t avoid me,” whispered Ji Hyo. “I miss my dongsaeng.”

Joong Ki blinked. The confused expression faded and was replaced with something sad and almost vulnerable. He looked hurt and happy all at once, and while Ji Hyo had learned to tell an act from the truth, she hadn’t learned to interpret Joong Ki’s emotions.

“What’s wrong?” asked Ji Hyo.

“Nothing,” said Joong Ki. “I wasn’t avoiding you, noona.”

“It sure felt like it,” muttered Ji Hyo.

“I was figuring some things out,” explained Joong Ki.

Ji Hyo pursed her lips. “Like what?”

Joong Ki hesitated. He opened his mouth, only to close it again a moment later. Finally, he leaned close and said, sadly, “Noona’s gaze always goes to one person.”

Ji Hyo pushed Joong Ki away from her. It was an instinctive reaction.

“Ow,” said Joong Ki, though Ji Hyo knew her push hadn’t hurt him at all.

All the Running Man members had turned to stare at the two of them.

Ji Hyo was definitely blushing now. She wasn’t stupid; she knew who Joong Ki was talking about. She had just thought that she had been more careful with her crush, acting calm around him and participating in her love line, but apparently Joong Ki had seen through all that. He knew she liked Jong Kook. And it had made him uncomfortable enough to avoid her.

Unable to help herself, Ji Hyo glanced across the table at Jong Kook. He wasn’t looking at her though. He was frowning at Joong Ki. Ji Hyo had thought they’d gotten over their argument; she hoped she wasn’t the reason they started fighting again.

“Did Joong Ki do something wrong?” Haha asked her.

“Did he offend you?” asked Gary. “Do we need to beat him up?”

Suk Jin scoffed. “By ‘we’, he means Jong Kook.”

“No,” said Ji Hyo quickly. “Joong Ki was explaining something to me and, uh, he breathed on my ear and I’m very ticklish.”

“So you hit him?” asked Haha with a laugh. “Remind me never to tickle Ji Hyo.”

“It might make for some good entertainment,” said Jae Suk.

“Don’t even think about it,” said Ji Hyo as she imagined all seven male cast members trying to tickle her for the Running Man cameras.

The conversation continued for a little while longer, the cast joking about entertaining things they could do on the show. Then, Jae Suk and Suk Jin were summoned backstage to present the first award of the night.

The table felt empty without them, and Ji Hyo scooted closer to Joong Ki. She listened to the cast members conversations, adding a quip here and there, but remaining quiet for the most part. She listened as Kwang Soo talked about his upcoming movie Battlefield Heroes and his role in the drama City Hunter. Haha was busy with Infinity Challenge as well as Running Man, but on top of that, he had been working on some new singles for 2011. Leessang kept Gary busy during the rest of the week, doing concerts and preparing to release another album in the upcoming year.

Eventually, the lights in the auditorium dimmed and the opening performance began. Ji Hyo smiled and bobbed her head to the music. There was a camera not far from their table, the lens moving from face to face. Ji Hyo thought she would have been used to cameras by now after being on Running Man for six months, but she still felt strange having her reactions filmed for national television. Did people really care what she thought of the performance?

The singing and dancing ended and the award show got underway. Ji Hyo couldn’t help but laugh when Jae Suk and Suk Jin stepped onto the stage together. Jae Suk looked as comfortable as always, while Suk Jin seemed awkward by comparison.

As Jae Suk and Suk Jin began their opening banter, the camera moved to the Running Man table. Ji Hyo tried not to look directly at the lens.

“Running Man, fighting!” said Suk Jin, holding up his fist with a determined expression on his face.

Jae Suk laughed awkwardly. “You should warn me before you start. You surprised me.” Jae Suk gave a knowing look to the audience. Then, he said, “We’re here to present the 2010 SBS Variety New Star Award.” He opened the envelope in one smooth movement. “There are ten winners this year.” He scanned the contents of the envelope and smiled. “Running Man’s Song Joong Ki.”

A wide grin spread across Ji Hyo’s face as she turned to see the surprised expression on Joong Ki’s face.

“Congratulations,” said Kwang Soo.

“Good job,” added Haha. “Now get on up there.”

“Congrats,” said Ji Ho, patting Joong Ki on the shoulder. “Nobody deserves it more than you.”

Joong Ki gave her a broad smile as he rose from his seat and made his way up the steps to the stage. Ji Hyo clapped enthusiastically. All concerns about him avoiding her and him knowing her secret had vanished. She couldn’t stop grinning; she was so proud of her dongsaeng.

The announcer’s voice filled the auditorium. “Song Joong Ki was called ‘pretty flower boy Joong Ki’ in Good Sunday – Running Man, becoming noonas’ dream romance.”

Ji Hyo couldn’t help but laugh at the ‘noonas’ dream romance’ comment. She looked around the Running Man table and saw that the other members were smiling and laughing too. They cheered as Joong Ki made his way up onto the stage. He shook hands with Jae Suk and Suk Jin after accepting his award. Then, he waited on stage for the rest of the winners to be called.

Suk Jin leaned closer to the microphone and said, “Running Man’s Kang Gary.”

Ji Hyo covered , hiding her wide smile. Two of her cast mates had won the newcomer award. She applauded Gary, watching as Haha and Jong Kook hugged him. Then, Gary made his way up onto the stage and joined Joong Ki after receiving his award.

“Running Man’s Lee Kwang Soo.”

Ji Hyo patted Kwang Soo on the shoulder. His mouth was open and he looked stunned that his name had been called.

“Get up there,” said Jong Kook, grinning.

Kwang Soo rose from his seat, still wearing an expression on disbelief, and headed up to the stage where Jae Suk and Suk Jin waited. They both hugged and congratulated him before sending him to stand beside Joong Ki and Gary.

The rest of the winners were called out: f(x)’s Luna, SHINee’s Minho, 2AM’s Jo Kwon, CNBLUE’s Jung Yong Hwa, Shin Dong, Kahi, and IU. Ji Hyo applauded them all politely, but she continued to glance in her cast mates’ direction, pride flowing through her. Joong Ki was smiling broadly, while Gary kept his gaze on the ceiling and Kwang Soo still looked pale.

After Jae Suk congratulated all the newcomers on their awards, it was time for speeches. Joong Ki stepped forward to the microphone and, after a quick glance at the Running Man table, he said, “Hello, I’m Song Joong Ki. Thank you very much! It’s my first time to get an award from one of the top three TV companies.” He paused and added, “I’m too nervous…I should speak louder.”

The audience chuckled.

“I really appreciate this,” continued Joong Ki. He glanced at the Running Man table again. “I feel this award should belong to the most earnest noona, Song Ji Hyo.”

Ji Hyo’s heart skipped a beat. He had thanked her directly. Why would he do that? What about the rest of the cast?  

“Thanks to my beloved parents, my family, and the respectable hyungs of Running Man. I’ve come to respect those working in variety shows very much. Those people are great. Therefore, to bring more smiles and joy to the audience, I will work harder. Thank you very much.”

Ji Hyo applauded with the rest of the Running Man cast, but she couldn’t help the uneasy feeling in her stomach. Why had Joong Ki thanked her by name, but lumped the other members together? He hadn’t even thanked Kwang Soo. What made her so special to Joong Ki? Ji Hyo inhaled sharply. Was it possible that Joong Ki thought of her as someone special? Did he think of her romantically?

Unable to help herself, Ji Hyo glanced in Jong Kook’s direction. Did he know? Was that the reason he and Joong Ki had been arguing? For a heartbeat, Ji Hyo imagined that Jong Kook had been jealous of Joong Ki, but moments later, she pushed that fantasy away. There was a long list of reasons why she shouldn’t have feelings for Jong Kook—not the least of which was that he wasn’t talking to her right now.

She tried to focus on Gary’s speech, clapping when he finished, and feigning interest when it was Kwang Soo’s turn. But she barely heard a word, her mind still trying to wrap itself around the idea that Joong Ki liked her romantically.

What would it mean for their friendship? How was she supposed to act around him? Had she done something to encourage him? She hadn’t meant to. She’d thought of him as a friend and she had treated him as such. How could he take it any other way? Had he taken their inside jokes and shared conversations to mean something more?

He couldn’t have. He was her dongsaeng. They were good friends. They had looked after each other during the early, uncertain days of Running Man. Through that, they had created a strong bond, thought Ji Hyo. They had helped one another create their characters. He had thanked her specifically because they’d depended on each other for support during the first few months on Running Man. That was all. There was no way her dongsaeng had feelings for her. Impossible.

Ji Hyo ran a hand through her hair and took a deep breath. It had to be impossible.

When Joong Ki returned to the table after receiving his award, Jong Kook couldn’t help but glare at him. Even since the morning on the ski slope, where Joong Ki had apologized for his behavior, Jong Kook had vowed that he would not comment on Joong Ki’s feelings for Ji Hyo. And so far, he’d held true to that vow. He’d said nothing as Joong Ki avoided Ji Hyo like she was the plague and he’d said nothing about Ji Hyo’s hurt expression when Joong Ki refused to get dinner with her, Kwang Soo, and Suk Jin.

Joong Ki was smiling as he returned to his chair next to Ji Hyo. Kwang Soo, with a hesitant expression, and Gary, still looking dazed, settled into their seats, while Jae Suk and Suk Jin had already returned from presenting just a few minutes prior.

Joong Ki eagerly began talking to Ji Hyo, and after some pause, she returned his enthusiasm. The relief on her face was obvious

Mixed feelings filled Jong Kook as Joong Ki and Ji Hyo talked. Watching Joong Ki ignore Ji Hyo over the past couple weeks had made Jong Kook feel guilty. While he didn’t think his coworker relationship with Ji Hyo could compare to Joong Ki’s friendship with her, Jong Kook did see the similarity between his actions to Ji Hyo and Joong Ki’s.

Jong Kook had ignored her at first because he’d been angry that she’d chosen him as a teammate for Bells Hide and Seek despite their conversation on the ski lift. However, when he’d approached her to apologize later on, she’d been angry with him in turn. Somehow, they’d both ended up ignoring each other for the rest of the filming. Jong Kook had planned to apologize to her the next Monday, but whenever he tried to talk to her, he’d become embarrassed and couldn’t find the right words. He had never been good at talking to women, and he didn’t know how to apologize to Ji Hyo. But there had been no ignoring the hurt expression on her face when he’d been unable talk to her.

Jong Kook was glad that Joong Ki had decided to stop ignoring  her—at least this way only one of them was avoiding her now. However, Jong Kook didn’t think that Joong Ki had suddenly gotten over his crush on Ji Hyo. After all, he had even mentioned her by name in his acceptance speech. Jong Kook wondered if Joong Ki had given up trying to get over Ji Hyo.

Despite his vow not to comment, Jong Kook had the overwhelming urge to shake Joong Ki by the shoulders and explain—slowly and clearly—that Joong Ki was part of the Song-Song siblings and that him having romantic feelings for Ji Hyo would disrupt the chemistry of the Running Man cast. And the fan reaction to Joong Ki having a crush on Ji Hyo would not be positive. The Monday Couple fans would be angry with him while Joong Ki’s fans would be angry with Ji Hyo. There would be no good ending. Why couldn’t Joong Ki understand that?

Suddenly, Ji Hyo looked way from Joong Ki. Her gaze met Jong Kook’s and they both froze. Jong Kook didn’t know what to do. He wanted to apologize for his immaturity over the past couple weeks, but Jong Kook had never been good at apologizing, and he stood by what he said about not wanting to encourage a love line between the two of them. Jong Kook opened his mouth to say something—he didn’t know what—but before he could, Ji Hyo looked away.

“What award is next?” she asked Suk Jin.

Suk Jin shrugged.

“The Variety Special Award,” said Jong Kook, who had read the program while waiting for the ceremony to start.

Ji Hyo glanced at him again, and Jong Kook winced at the surprised expression on her face; she hadn’t expected him to talk to her. Jong Kook was the one who broke eye contact this time, embarrassed by his own immaturity over  the past couple weeks.

Jong Kook felt someone’s gaze on him, and he turned to see Joong Ki staring, his mouth set in a thin line.

“Did my speech make sense?” asked Gary, disrupting the tense atmosphere. “I was so nervous.”

“You were fine, hyung,” said Haha.

“‘Fine’?” Gary laughed. “‘Fine’ isn’t encouraging.”

“Well, I wouldn’t call you ‘great’,” muttered Suk Jin. “You stumbled over every word.”

“Everyone’s nervous when they receive their first award,” said Jae Suk.

“I’ve won awards with Leessang before,” said Gary. “And I didn’t feel this nervous.”

“But you haven’t won anything for variety,” explained Jae Suk. “And you’re much more comfortable with music than variety.”

“Though you’re getting better,” said Haha.

Jong Kook nodded. “Your lines for Monday Couple are great. You’re much more comfortable on camera now than you were in the first few episodes.”

“Ji Hyo too,” said Jae Suk. “She’s doing much better with Monday Couple now.”

“You were so nervous at first, noona,” said Kwang Soo with a laugh. “And now you’ve had love lines with Gary-hyung, Haha-hyung, and Joong Ki—even Jong Kook-hyung if you count the fans’ comments.”

Jong Kook managed a stiff smile, ignoring Kwang Soo’s words. Ji Hyo was indeed much better with her love lines, even encouraging Gary at times and joking around with Haha. Jong Kook hoped his advice in the beginning had helped her.

“That’s because I realized love lines could help me win games,” said Ji Hyo.

The cast laughed, but they were cut short as the house lights dimmed, marking the end of the commercial break. The two presenters walked out together, wide smiles plastered on their faces. They had the customary jokes and chitchat before opening the red envelope. The man leaned into the mic and said, “Variety Special Award goes to…” he paused dramatically. “Kim Byung Sae-sshi and Song Ji Hyo-sshi—congratulations!”

Jong Kook automatically broke into applause. He turned to look at Ji Hyo who had a hand over . Her eyes were wide with shock.

“Congratulations, noona,” said Kwang Soo, helping her up from her seat.

Kim Byung Sae of Star King was already on stage, receiving his award, as Ji Hyo made her way up the steps. Through the loudspeaker, the announcer could be heard, saying, “Song Ji Hyo, a red spot in Good Sunday – Running Man, shows a generous charm she didn’t show as an actress. The rediscovery of Song Ji Hyo earns the audience’s love.”

Jong Kook winced on Ji Hyo’s behalf. Yoon Eun Hye had told him about the dangers of being an actress and variety star; audiences tended to confuse the variety persona with the real human being and had trouble separating this image from the drama or film character. It seemed people were already starting to compare Song Ji Hyo the Actress to Song Ji Hyo the Ace.

Jong Kook stood up and clapped along with the rest of the cast. He smiled, genuinely proud of Ji Hyo. She deserved it. To be honest, before episode twenty-one, he would have said that a lot of her Ace persona was given to her by the editors and the male cast members going easy on her, He’d since realized that she really did work hard. She was much cleverer than he’d given her credit for, and if he wasn’t trying to avoid a love line, he would have enjoyed teaming up with her more often.

Ji Hyo stood on stage beside Kim Byung Sae. She smiled nervously at the camera before stepping forward to give her acceptance speech.

“Thank you for giving me such a meaningful award.” She smiled again and said, “I’m so nervous…” Taking a deep breath, she continued, “First, thanks to Running Man family. Thanks to the staff, PDs, writer. I’ll run harder for Running Man. Thank you.”

The audience broke into applause—no one cheered louder or longer than the Running Man table. Jong Kook continued standing until they ushered Ji Hyo and Kim Byung Sae off stage. The presenters signaled that there was another commercial break, and the audience turned to one another to talk.

While the others talked about how deserving Ji Hyo was, Jong Kook excused himself for the restroom and made his way out of the auditorium. To his surprise, Joong Ki followed. They stopped in the hallway, standing beside the floor-to-ceiling windows looking out at the parking lot. There were only a handful people there—two ushers and a woman in a long dress. Jong Kook nodded at them in greeting.

“Hyung,” said Joong Ki. “I want to explain.”

“You don’t have explain anything to me,” said Jong Kook, biting his tongue. He had a thousand comments and pieces of advice he wanted to give, but he kept them shut up inside him.

“You were angry with me, hyung,” said Joong Ki. “I saw your glare when I sat down after receiving the award.”

“It’s my small eyes,” joked Jong Kook, trying to lighten up the atmosphere. “It sometimes looks like I’m glaring.”

Joong Ki grinned. Unlike Jong Kook, he didn’t seem wary of the ushers standing in the hallway. People liked to talk, and with the help of the internet, it was much easier now for rumors to spread than it had been in the 1990s when Turbo was popular. Jong Kook could only imagine that some fan forum would have posts tomorrow about how Kim Jong Kook and Song Joong Ki had been arguing at the 2010 SBS Entertainment Awards. If rumors were exaggerated enough, someone would probably claim that it’d been a fistfight. Jong Kook kept an eye on the ushers—just in case one of them whipped out a cellphone.

Joong Ki took a deep breath and said, “Ji Hyo-noona was determined to sit next to me at the start of the award ceremony, and it made me realize that I haven’t been treating her right. I shouldn’t have ignored her. And, well, just because I want to be over Ji Hyo-noona, it doesn’t mean that my liking for her will disappear. I know she doesn’t feel the same way…she didn’t even mention me in her…” Joong Ki shook his head. “But she looks at me while she’s wearing that dress and…” He shrugged. “You can’t will your feelings away, you know. So I figured that just for tonight, I’ll allow myself to like her. Then when the New Year comes I’ll try to move on.” He met Jong Kook’s gaze. “You understand, right?”

Jong Kook didn’t understand why Joong Ki had to explain to him of all people. Why was it so important to Joong Ki that he understood?

“I understand,” said Jong Kook finally. “Even if I don’t agree, I understand.”

Joong Ki smiled. “Work and love should be separate, right, hyung?”

“It makes things easier,” said Jong Kook.

“Tell Ji Hyo-noona that,” muttered Joong Ki.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Joong Ki smiled. Then, with a quick “Good-bye,” he headed back into the auditorium.

Jong Kook remained in the hallway, stunned for a second. For some reason, he felt that Joong Ki was trying to teach his hyung something rather than the other way round.

Running Man did very well at the 2010 SBS Entertainment Awards. Not only did Jae Suk win the 20 Year Anniversary Variety Star Award and Jong Kook win the Best TV Star Award, but Running Man won the title of Netizen Most Popular Program. After the ceremony and post-show interviews had ended, the Running Man cast and staff planned to meet at a local restaurant for a celebratory dinner.

It was near midnight when Jong Kook arrived there with Haha and Gary. They had changed into regular clothes and were still riding the excitement from winning the Most Popular Program award. Cho and Myuk PDs hugged them when they first entered the private room of the restaurant.

“Thank you for all your hard work,” said Cho PD.

“We couldn’t have done it without you,” added Kim PD from his seat at the table.

“You’re finally here,” called out Suk Jin. He was sitting at the back of the room with Joong Ki, Kwang Soo, and Ji Hyo. None of them had changed out of their dress clothes before coming to the restaurant.

“Why did you change?” complained Joong Ki. “Now the rest of us look silly.”

“Only you three look silly,” said Haha, pointing to the three men. “Ji Hyo looks stunning.”

Jong Kook nodded as he sat down at the wooden table next to Suk Jin. Ji Hyo did look good. The white dress showed off all her curves and emphasized her big eyes. For some reason, her looking so stunning made it harder for him to apologize.

“Where’s Jae Suk-hyung?” asked Gary, taking the seat opposite Jong Kook.

“He can’t make it,” said Suk Jin. “He has to attend the 20 Year Anniversary party.”

“And that’s more important than us?” cried Haha, pretending to be outraged.

“Jae Suk sees us all the time,” said Jong Kook. “He’s probably relieved to be free of us.”

Haha grinned. “He’s thinking, ‘Finally, I’m free of those weirdos.’”

“What are you talking about?” asked Ji Hyo. “Jae Suk-oppa is the biggest weirdo of all of us.”

“Don’t forget,” said Joong Ki, lowering his voice. “Kwang Soo’s here.”

“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be my friend,” cried Kwang Soo, even though he was smiling.

Conversation with the Running Man cast was becoming easy. At first, it had been Jae Suk who had tied them together, making sure everyone was included. But now, even though divisions still existed, they could talk and laugh together without requiring Jae Suk’s influence. Jong Kook was beginning to appreciate Suk Jin’s cynical humor, and he was starting to realize that Joong Ki wasn’t just an overeager youth.

Jong Kook had a long conversation with Suk Jin at dinner. Suk Jin could brag about his son endlessly, and Jong Kook couldn’t help but admire the man—Suk Jin was a great dad. Jong Kook wished he could be a father like Suk Jin one day.

Throughout the dinner, the Running Man members shifted around, talking to one another and tasting the others’ food. At first, Jong Kook sat next to Suk Jin, but then Suk Jin and Haha traded places. Then Ji Hyo and Kwang Soo swapped seats, followed by Kwang Soo and Haha.

“Congratulations on your award,” said Jong Kook, patting his dongsaeng on the back.

“You too, hyung,” said Kwang Soo, grinning from ear-to-ear. He glanced around the table and then, lowering his voice, said, “Joong Ki said he cornered you outside the auditorium.”

Jong Kook sighed. He suspected Kwang Soo had had a little too much to drink. “He wanted to talk to me.”

“About the girl his likes,” said Kwang Soo with a little laugh.

Jong Kook nodded.

“He told you ‘cause he wants you to like him.” Kwang Soo leaned back in his seat. “Hyung’s strong and intelligent. No wonder he wanted to compete with you and prove himself.” Kwang Soo whispered the last part conspiratorially, “Joong Ki wants to be like you.”

Jong Kook stared at the empty bowl in front of him. He didn’t want to think about Joong Ki right then. Was he supposed to be flattered that Joong Ki admired him or was he supposed to explain to Joong Ki that he was a terrible role model? And why did Joong Ki want to prove himself? Jong Kook didn’t know. He just wanted to celebrate Running Man’s success.

“You shouldn’t tell other people’s confidences,” muttered Jong Kook.

“What?” Kwang Soo blinked then covered his mouth with his hand. “I didn’t say anything, hyung.”

“I’ll keep your secret,” said Jong Kook.

“What secret?” asked Gary, who was sitting on the opposite side of the table.

“Kwang Soo wears shoe lifts,” said Jong Kook without missing a beat.

“What?” Gary turned to Kwang Soo. “You’re tall enough already! Shoe lifts are for people like Haha and me.”

“You don’t wear shoe lifts, do you, hyung?” asked Ji Hyo from the far end of the table.

“Me? Never,” said Gary quickly.

“Aww, look, he’s showing off for his girlfriend,” said Haha with a laugh. He turned to Ji Hyo and said, “He wears the same shoe lifts as me—that way he can always be taller than I am.”

“It’s not Monday,” said Ji Hyo. Jong Kook hid a smile; even though she’d become more comfortable with her love line, she still hated being reminded of it on any other day of the week.

“Joong Ki,” cried Kwang Soo, suddenly getting up from his seat and moving to stand next to Joong Ki. “My dear friend. We’ll always be friends no matter what, right?”

“What?” Joong Ki frowned. “Why are you asking that?”

“No reason,” said Kwang Soo quickly.

Ji Hyo rose from her seat, allowing Kwang Soo to take her place. She patted him on the shoulder and said, “Kwang Soo, I think you’ve had enough to drink.”

“I’m fine, noona,” said Kwang Soo.

“I’ll take him home,” said Joong Ki, smiling up at Ji Hyo.

“You’re a good friend,” Ji Hyo told him. For some reason, Jong Kook thought he heard a hard emphasis on the word ‘friend’. Joong Ki must have heard it too, because he winced a little.

Ji Hyo moved around the table to take Kwang Soo’s previous seat. She paused when her gaze landed on Jong Kook. The blank expression on her face made Jong Kook inwardly cringe. He hated hurting her. He need to apologize…except he didn’t know how.

“Congratulations on the award,” said Jong Kook with the friendliest smile he could muster. “You deserve it.”

“Thanks,” said Ji Hyo, lowering herself into the seat. “You too.”

Jong Kook stared at the table in front of him. What was he supposed to say? He couldn’t just jump into an apology. He needed to say something, lead into the topic. How does one lead into an apology?

“I went snowboarding last weekend,” said Ji Hyo.

“You did?” Jong Kook grinned, relieved that she’d started the conversation. “How was it?”

“It didn’t hurt as much as last time.”

“The first three days are the worst,” said Jong Kook.

Ji Hyo nodded. “That’s what my friend kept telling me, but when I kept falling down every few seconds, I didn’t believe her.”

“Are you going to stick with it?” asked Jong Kook. “Or go back to skiing?”

“I like snowboarding, said Ji Hyo. “With skiing, you have to carrying two skis and two poles, with snowboarding you just have to carry the board. So much easier.”

“That’s why I picked snowboarding too,” said Jong Kook.

“I managed one run down the slope without falling,” said Ji Hyo. “At the end of the weekend. And it was the easiest hill they had.”

“Still, that’s progress,” said Jong Kook. “You must have been sore afterward.”

“My knees were killing me.”

“Mine were black and blue after my first day of snowboarding,” said Jong Kook. “I could barely stand up.”

It was easy to talk to Ji Hyo about snowboarding. She enjoyed the sport and was happy to exchange ski slope horror stories with him. She told him about losing one of her poles in the snow, and he told her about getting stuck on a flat road and having to carry his board while skiers zipped past him. They laughed and joked, and Jong Kook remembered how much he liked her. It was such a waste of a potential friendship to fight like they had been.

“So are we done ignoring one another?” he asked.

Ji Hyo froze for a second. Then, she nodded. “It’s embarrassing to think about now.”

“I know.” Jong Kook glanced down the table to make sure none of the other Running Man members were listening. Gary and Kwang Soo were teasing Joong Ki about his terrible dancing, while Haha and Suk Jin were talking about their favorite girl groups.

Jong Kook turned back to Ji Hyo. She was smiling. Her black eyeliner was slightly smudged and her hair had started to frizz, but she still looked very pretty.

“I still think we should be careful during filming,” said Jong Kook.

Ji Hyo bit her bottom lip. “Why do you dislike love lines so much?”

“I don’t dislike them,” said Jong Kook. “You and Gary make a great Monday Couple. It’s helped the show and it’s helped the two of you establish characters and get screen time. There’s plenty of great things about love lines.”

“But…” Ji Hyo raised her eyebrows. “I know you’re going to add a ‘but’ in there.”

Jong Kook smiled. “But I’m done with love lines. And, well, it’s really hard to be friends with you love line partner.”

Ji Hyo blinked and then glanced down the table at Gary. “Is it?”

“It is,” said Jong Kook grimly. “But not impossible.”

Ji Hyo turned back to Jong Kook. “I don’t want to be in a love line with you, but I also don’t want to avoid you during filming.”

Jong Kook grimaced.

“But,” said Ji Hyo quickly, “I suppose we’ll just have to agree to disagree. I don’t think we should let disagreements about filming get between our, um, friendship.”

She said the word quickly, hesitantly, as if she wasn’t sure Jong Kook wanted to be friends.

He smiled. “We can do that.”

A/N: So what do you think? How is my portrayal of Song Joong Ki? I'm not a huge SJK fan, so I don't know his personality that well. The other RM members are easier to write.