'Tae, are you sick ?'

Taehyung felt his world stopped with those few words. He didn't know his lungs could hurt this bad when he didn't put any work to it. He looked back at Hana, staring into her glazing brown orbs.

Don't cry. Please don't cry.

His voice croaked, 'Where did you hear that ?'

Hana closed her eyes, 'Is it true ?'

'I am not healthy but I am not sick. Well, at least not anymore.' Taehyung said quietly, leaning against the headboard.

Hana sat up and scoot closer to him until their shoulders touch, 'What do you mean by that ?'

'Well,' Taehyung cleared his throat. 'I was born with a con heart defects. I was diagnosed with VSD when I was an infant.'

'What does that mean ?' She asked, there's curiosity and hesitation in her voice. It scared her, listening to him talking about something that might take him away from her.

'Ventricular septal defect. Means, you have hole in your septum.' Taehyung said, trying to sound nonchalant.

'So you have hole in your heart ?'

Taehyung laughed at how surprisingly funny that sound, 'Pretty much.'

He continued, 'It was a common heart defects and highly curable, but I still have to undergo an open-heart surgery, when I was a baby.'

Hana's heart was beating faster than normal and she wondered if the boy besides her was breathing fine, 'You were a strong baby.'

His smile was forlon, 'I guess I was. It was a success, as expected. However, every month I have to go to the local hospital for check ups and once a year, my dad would bring me to a cardiology hospital in Chelsea for annual assessment.'

'So that's where you go ? But the lady said you went to America.' Hana stated, confused.

Taehyung looked at her quizzically, 'What lady ?'

'Oh ? Well- um-,' Hana stuttered, suddenly embarrassed to admit that she waited for him in front of his house almost everyday.'I went to your house once, to see if you're back. Then there's this one lady, she was walking her dog.'

'Mrs. Ahn ?'

'I guess ? I forgot to ask for her name. Well, she told me you were sick and that you went to America for treatment.' She mumbled.

'She must've misheard it then.'

'I think so.' She nodded. 'But, Tae, why is it so long ? You were there for a month.'

Taehyung inhaled slowly, 'Well, it was supposed to be a one week trip there but when they checked my heart, they noticed something wrong with it.'

Hana was trying to calm her heart beat down, assuring herself that it was nothing serious.

'So you know that hole in the heart that I said before ?' Taehyung fiddled with her fingers. He always found himself reaching out for her soft, small hand.

Hana was trying to ignore the tingles that his small circles drawings was giving her, 'That they have managed to cover up successfully ?'

'Well, they don't know how it happened, but my septum wall was thin apparently and somehow, another holes appeared.' He said sullenly.

Hana looked at him, 'Holes ?'

Taehyung lifted his gaze to meet hers, 'It was one of the rare cases of vsd. I have several holes in my heart, you see. They called it 'swiss cheese' septal defects. I thought it was disgusting.'

'Taehyungㅡ'

'They have to do the surgery as soon as possible because I was starting to have breathing difficulty upon arrival. So they scheduled me for emergency but because it was not a usual case and I am not an infant, they couldn't just open my heart and band my PA.'

'But you can't breathe !' Hana shrieked.

Taehyung's mind went back to those nights when breathing was a struggle. He was on lasix and captopril but even that didn't help. He had wished she was there so bad.

'I had to be transferred to Newcastle because apparently,  they have a cardiologist that was the best in the 'swiss cheese' defects surgery. The surgery took hours but the holes was closed successfully. The lined my septal walls with tissues to made sure it was thicker.' He focused on her palm and less on his heartbeat. He knew how good she was in biology so he also knew that she could understand it quicker that he did.

'Was it painful ?' She asked quietly.

'Wouldn't be so bad if you were there.' He but he meant it.

Hana felt her inside warm at his word but she knew her cheeks were warmer. She dropped her head to avoid him noticing her blush.

Hana shoved Taehyung's shoulder that was touching hers, 'They forgot to fix your brain.'

Taehyung laugh at that. He had missed this. Feeling so content and light. He had missed her.

'So, it means you're all good now ? Your heart are doing their job properly ?'

'Pretty much. The doctor said the chances of relapsing or the holes opening up are close to impossible. My heart is all good.' He said, while tracing the skin in between her thumb and index finger.

Hana watched as he rested his head on the headboard. When he noticed her staring, he turned his head and flashed her his mega watt smile.

My heart is not.

Her heart skipped a beat and she was suddenly all too aware of how close they were sitting and how warm he was where their shoulders touch and how his soothing circles was causing her a tremor of pleasure.

Not good at all.

'Are you okay ?' Taehyung's question caught her off guard.

'Wha-what do you mean ?' She stuttered.

'When I was not here, something obviously happened.' He looked at her legs that was under the duvet. 'Are you okay ?'

'I'm fine. It's nothing new, Tae.' Hana smiled, glad he was not talking about how flustered she was by their close proximity.

Taehyung however, hated how she had sounded so nonchalant about it. Like she's used to it. He hated that she was brought up to be used to this kind of things.

'Just because it has happened before, doesn't mean you have to get used to it. This is not okay, Hana.' The anger in his voice didn't went unnoticed by her.

She tried to comforted him with a smile, 'Hey, I'm all go