XAHI
 

NICKNAMES:

➼ XEN the name he goes by during his time in gaoling to avoid being found out or suspected so everyone he encounters knows him by this name. there was no particular reason he chose this name.

APPEARANCE:

➼ xahi's brown black hair is naturally parted in the middle but he usually styles it parted off to the side with some gel when on duty. his thick eyebrows and sharp jawline along with the absence of facial hair makes his eyes one of his most prominent features. his so-called "death stare" as said by sheva are able to make any person stay away from him. his height and physicality further causes his general aura to be intimidating on the top of that as his muscular frame can be attributed to the extensive physical training he's went through the years.

STYLE:

➼ due to the physical demands of his day job, xahi does not really care about his clothes. he wears the guard uniform given to him by sheva's family. on the day he's allowed to go back to his mother in the middle ring, xahi would go back to wearing his modest clothes. he doesn't have any fancy belt or other ornaments. [examples: one (ignore pirate hat) two three four]

➼ even after leaving ba sing se and staying in gaoling for a while, his clothes remain the same ragged (as perhaps described by one of yyn's group before sheva comes to his defence) style he's always worn. 

Who are you?

TRAITS:
alert, responsible, confident, resilient, stern, pessimistic, ruthless, closed-off

PERSONALITY:

xahi is much like a flower growing out of concrete. the resilience to endure the events he's been through often causes sheva to verbally express her respect and admiration towards him. he tells her occassionally that there are not many things in the world that can break his heart anymore. he'll bend, but he vows to never break. that is the kind of person he is. xahi's mental control is something else, sheva would often brag about him to the gaoling citizens and with good reason. he finds strength from within and adapt, doing whatever it takes to get through another day because he knows better than anyone than to lazy around. situations can change in a swift moment and circumstances can be forfeited as swift as that so xahi knows to always be on his feet. he's always in tune with his surroundings and so, perhaps, sheva's remarks was right: it's not him that should fear danger, danger should fear him. it's mostly attributed to the strong sense of responsibility he's had since he was a kid. he does not ignore his responsibilities even if he was just a kid and due to the weight of taking care of himself and his mother on his shoulders, he's always made sure he could be accountable for his own decisions because there was nobody to help them. in his upbringing, he's always been trusted to take care of himself, to work and to stay away from trouble. such a trust is paid back by xahi through such accountability and awareness. he's proven many times that he's not just some kid who throws the blame who is capable of being given the job and that you can actually trust him. perhaps, his confidence plays a role here because he's always in-check of what his capabilities are and believes in them. for what it's worth, he doesn't let his surroundings affect his emotions. he's the one whose in control that can decide what his emotions do.

nonetheless, xahi is also much like a ticking time bomb. those who know his name will know that it's better not to mess with him as xahi is capable of being ruthless. more so, when he's being professional, he will not hesitate to make blood trickle if it means to protect himself or others precious to him. his ways of conduct may be cruel or brutal (in short, what he doeesn't want sheva to witness in him) but such is because he's got nothing to lost anymore and people like xahi are people who do what must be done in order to survive. he's seen and heard too much not to become pessimistic and has learned to be cynical. there is not much kindness given to you when you are poor or barely making it and for so long, xahi's heart and mind remains bitter before sheva's warmth and compassion slowly caused him to see the light at the end of the tunnel. even so, there is still much inside xahi that reminds distrustful and suspecting of others because he cannot let go. he believes that if he lets go of his pessimism, he'll be vulnerable and that's the last thing xahi ever wants to be. despite him saying otherwise, he is strict on himself. xahi doesn't give himself a break or time to slow down and lets his world keep spinning even when it's not mandatory. not that he's strict on others, xahi only focuses on himself as he knows he cannot impose change on others. he whips himself to keep going and demands a lot from himself so that he can be someone who achieves things without others' justifications. at the end of the day, all this takes a toll on xahi mentally, emotionally and physically because he puts so much effort without hitting the break and it gets worse when it is clear to those who encounter him that xahi is emotionally constipated. he ties himself in a neat knot so that he always seems levelheaded and objective, capable of setting aside his humanity in order to get through with the task or challenge ahead, when in fact, he's thirsty of feeling warmth and concern. xahi just doesn't seem to know or acknowledge it yet.

why? since, when it comes to his inner demons, xahi is in this lone fight against himself. everything he struggles with comes from the inside, not affected by the world around him even if he tries to correlate external factors he sees into the equation. he has to be able to put down his pride and ego or whatever is holding him back from acknowledging his thirst and problems because truly, xahi has to be the one to face them and win from the inside.

BACKGROUND: 

PART I. THE BIRTH OF THE GUARD IN THE MIDDLE RING

becoming one of the best cooks in the middle ring market square after seeking refuge in ba sing se, mrs. kyarin gave birth to a healthy baby boy one autumn day. remembering her late husband's wishes, she named the baby xahi. it was since then, kyarin vowed to raise xahi well even if she was alone. her husband, mashih, would've wanted for her and his son. one of the concerns kyarin had was what she should tell her son one day about his father. out of all the possibilities, she chose to tell him a narrative far from the actual truth: his father died of illness in her stories when summer came in the middle ring shortly after she was pregnant. kyarin knew that her decision would affect xahi for the rest of his life but at the time, she thought it'd be the best solution. xahi should never know of the events that caused his father's death if she and him were to live long in ba sing se because after all, there is no war in ba sing se.

PART II. THE SIMPLE LIFE IN THE MIDDLE RING'S MARKET

growing up, xahi was accustomed to helping his mother run her food kiosk in the middle ring market square and he didn't mind forgoing formal education in order for them to have enough to live off on. even when he was a kid, he understood and made himself responsible for his actions. he was responsible for his mother and from a young age, he promised to help her pull through and work together to do so. that's why he didn't mind life without a father. his mother was enough and doing such a great job at raising him so whenever she mentioned his father, he took it in without a doubt. he didn't mind listening to her stories or descriptions of him despite wanting to ask more. he knew better than to do so in the case he unintentionally touches a place in her heart he shouldn't have. he didn't want to disappoint her and every night, always went to sleep with her lullabies and his words of love. i love you, mother. 

xahi was only seventeen when he realized from the words of other merchants or passerbys of the market square that his mother's health was slowly deterioting, be it through signs of back pain, headaches or fatigue. afterwards, teen xahi took on more part-time hours helping around the market square in order to purchase some herbs and basic medicines for his mother even if she refuses to take them in front of him when he comes home after buying them. however, the part-time wages paid to him weren't going to be enough but due to his young age, most people reject his persistent inquiries in hopes they'd employ him. there was no choice for xahi, really but to perservere with what's in front of him right now. he was nineteen when he heard from several older male merchants that guys who get hired by elite families from the private firms that trained young males specifically for guarding duties were paid very well. it didn't take long for xahi to intervene in the conversation to ask about it. that's how he walked into the private firm at the age of nineteen, the youngest those firms ever accept, and started his one year training. he made the best of his training, having not been through such processes where he gets any form of education, and he went from someone who couldn't stand a punch to someone who could easily throw the first punch and win a fight. he found combat and weapons training rather exhilarating as him being a blank canvas actually made him easily undersand and master such skills. every so often, he would tell or write to his mother about how well he did in training. thus, it made sense for those at the private firms to put him into the short list that would eventually land in the hands of general rahuo and the luck he had was that at the age of twenty, his luck and fate led him to report to sheva's door on his first day on duty.

PART III. THE TURNING POINT

life as sheva's guard was unexpectedly endurable. he had the last day of the week off to go spend time with his mother and living within the family compound of general rahuo was rather eye-opening. despite going into the job with a professional mind, there is compassion within sheva's heart that made her extend her hand to him and as if taken over by something inside him, he willingly chose to go by her ways. sheva was good-natured and unlike what he expected, she was rather nonchalant and "un-ladylike" as the words of captain rushe. he found himself helping her get some materials to tinker on at night and form a personal bodn with her. there was something in her determination to tinker and lose herself in the books or writings of her creations. sometimes, he wondered if he would've been able to go to ba sing se university and study dilligently. just sometimes. xahi rarely expresses his thoughts and desires but somehow, in a passing moment, he once told sheva, "i was actually once really interested in something called anthropology. people-watching, observing, something about people just excite me and ignite my mind. well, it's all just a long lost dream now."

how foolish he was, to admit such a thought he'd so ever kept deep inside his heart but sheva's response, along with the scent of jasmine tea brewing in the background and the smile that brimmed on her face, was "never think having a dream is foolish because such is the beauty of young bloods like you and me." the nonchalant optimism that sometimes comes from sheva's mouth often comforted something in xahi that has long been hungry. empathy. perhaps, that's why xahi found being sheva's guard to be an eye-opener and such words from sheva actually caused him to compile his observations of people and their behavioral patterns. seeing how the elites dealt with one another, how the verbal exchanges go, the ambiance set by the music, cuisine and decorations were all things he enjoyed paying attention to while doing his job. he'd always wonder and contemplate on general rahuo and sheva's relationship the most out of all things as theirs were a dynamic he'd ever seen before. why bargain and scratch one another's feelings when in fact, you cherish and care for one another so much deep down? 

it had been four years since he reported for duty as sheva's guard and he was glad to have seen her finish her studies to the end. with the flower petals blooming in the back and the cool breeze, xahi timidly congratulated her to which sheva answered with her signature smile that lights up something in his chest, "you, especially xahi, helped me a lot all these years so congratulations to you, too". one day, as he was on his way to his mother, many of the aunties of the market square rushed him. he remembered how one of the men shout to him, i think her heart gave out, xahi! upon hearing such exclaims, xahi remembered running the fastest he could to their house. he checked her pulse points and it was getting weaker and weaker. he made sure to use the lifesaving techniques he learned in training. the last words she uttered as she and xahi's eyes met were i'm sorry but i'll always love you. his mother closed his eyes and in that moment, the world seemed to mute itself and went into black and white. there was nothing to the world in that moment except despair, grief and tears. how could there be color in his line of sight when everything in his world has fallen apart?

as xahi was sorting out his mother's stuff, his eyes were drawn to an enveloped letter she addressed to him as there was the P.S. on the envelope written as "in the case i leave first" that made him wonder. he opened the envelope and found the three pages she wrote. it was dated back to when he was nineteen and she wrote all the things he never knew he wanted to know. his mother already knew her days were limited at that point and hoped that by writing the letter, her passing in the future wouldn't startle him too much. xahi cried once more as he paid attention to every word. she even disclosed him the real truth about his father, apologizing for choosing to not tell him as she only thought it'd be for his sake. he remembered how she wrote out, your father mashih was an army corporal who lost his life in the war between earth and fire when he was defending our town thus leaving me, a pregnant mother, to seek refuge in ba sing se and give birth to you alone in the middle ring. that was different from his mother's words and this caused xahi's heart to break into pieces. why is it that he only found out about this when she's passed away? it did not make his mourning any better, especially now that he knows that there is a war raging outside of ba sing se. he was not safe anymore, especially since he was in close proximity with an elite family. he could easily become a target.

PART IV. THE RUN AWAY FROM BA SING SE

despite what happened, xahi tried to pick himself up to report back to duty by sheva's side. after all, that was his only job now. he had pondered a lot on how to tell her the news, knowing how much he's told her about his mother, since sheva was in a joyous mood following her graduation. what he didn't expect that day was her storming out of the dining room as fast as lightning to which he met her eyes that were on the verge of tears. he didn't mean to eavesdrop but the shouting of emotions between the four family members were clearly heard outside the door he had been on standby. xahi knew sheva was not in a good mood after that. leave, xahi, if you must, i don't think you have any obligations to guard me if i leave, she said to him as she arrived in her room but not even that could sting his chest after the events of the day prior so he didn't flinch. that's when tears trickled down as he could barely muster the strength from inside his chest to tell her,  i am alone in this world now without my mother and i do not know what my life is anymore. the embrace sheva gave was indeed warm and only then as xahi leaned on sheva's shoulders, did the world slowly regain its color in his eyes.

that's why xahi decided to help sheva leave ba sing se. he wanted nothing to do with ba sing se if his mother was no longer there for him and perhaps, deep down, he wanted to escape thinking about the fact that his father died of a war and was actually a part of the army. xahi packed his bags, not like he had a lot of stuff to bring with him in the first place, and with sheva, they leaved the following night. where are we going, xahi? he remembered her asking that night. gaoling, the furthest we can be from all this, young lady, he sternly said. xahi remembered opening up to sheva once more after his emotions have settled in about the letter his mother left him. a simple "it must've been tough for you, xahi so take your time to mourn and take it in, okay?" came out of her lips and xahi remembered how much it made the waves of emotions in his heart calm down. sheva always had this effect on him so it saddens him to hear her apologize every time she feels bad for dragging him. if only she knew that he deliberately dragged himself so that he had a reason to run. surely, if she didn't muster the courage first to talk of running away, he wasn't as courageous as her to do so alone. xahi has come to the mental conclusion that he lucked himself out to have met sheva because he knows that if she had met her, even his late mother would've sung praises about sheva.

a year has passed since then. xahi, now known to the people of gaoling as xen, is currently working as a full-time worker for one of the market square's shopkeeps. he and sheva live near the market square and the school sheva (known as shan in gaoling) is teaching. sheva often teases him whenever he goes along with the coos of many gaoling citizens, especially the market square's people and merchants, who misinterpret them as a couple but perhaps deep down, such coos are just what he wanted. it would be a plain lie if xahi says that he's come to terms with what his father was, now more free to get to know about the war through the citizens of gaoling he interacts with so xahi chooses to keep his thoughts inside his mind for now. in retrospect, xahi thinks that him coming to gaoling is just another way of escapism and he loathes on that thought because yet again, he couldn't be brave enough to overcome it. he's currently taking his time to sort out his feelings and thoughts, just as sheva adviced him to, so his plan to get his life direction and desire figured out is one without a clear deadline. he doesn't pressure himself and hopes that the answer will come to him naturally if he does so.

TRIVIA:

➼ he always brings this compass that has his grandparents' parents' names because it's the only remnants of his family so he introduces the compass as his family heirloom. he keeps it close to him at all times.
➼ he doesn't really have any favorite cuisines because he eats virtually anything edible but there'll always be something to his mother's noodle soup and braised turtle duck that can't be beaten by any other dish he may encounter.
➼ never really understood why people stargaze or look at the sky but over the years, he's come to make it a way to entertain himself and clear his mind as he's on standby by sheva's bedroom door. there is something about it that makes his imagination open up.
➼ he'd always wonder to himself if he was born in different circumstances, would he have wanted the same dream of studying anthropology at the ba sing se university. 
➼ with that being said, he's always found being a part of a crowded place interesting because he enjoyed people-watching or just observing people who pass by him. that's why he actually found observing the behaviors of the upper ring elites or sheva's family at the least to be fascinating because there were a lot of things to pay attention to.
➼ there was a certain kid who went around playing the liuqin when he was younger and out of pity, he bought the liuqin for an interesting price so since then, he had played the liuqin whenever the market merchants would gather or have festivities. sheva admits that he's quite skilled in playing it, unlike his appearance.
➼ once he's asleep, he sleeps like a rock but he is very sensitive when there are sounds because he hates his sleep being interrupted.
➼ one of his commendable traits that has been mentioned of him by both general rahuo and madame hosha is his sense of loyalty because they've never seen such a guard with the level of trust and faith for sheva as he does (there were rumors at a certain point that he was called "sheva's guard dog" amongst the male elites who seemed to fancy sheva). yyn and the group does notice this as well.
➼ he personally may have trouble dealing with yyn because of her temper but hopefully, he doesn't lash off whenever sheva's around.
➼ only knew what wine tasted like thanks to sheva and honestly, he is conflicted about what he feels. it is tasty but the minor headache he got after the bottle they shared was a pain.
➼ isn't the most verbal about his feelings thus his actions speak louder than his words so he's more prone to showing himself through his acts of service. xahi doesn't really allow people (read: people other than sheva) to have physical interactions with him like hugs or anything like that because he's not used to it.

RELATIONSHIPS: 

➼ CORPORAL MASHIH father (27 at time of death) / courageous, understanding, virtuous (as described by his mother, at least) / 0/10

what is there to be said about his father when xahi himself has never seen or interacted with him? he's only ever gotten a glimpse of his face through his mother's possessions and his personality through her descriptions but that was it. does he resent him? how could he when the stories told by his mother were all good in nature? he just sometimes wonders with curiosity what life would've been if he was alive. would he be where he is now if his father had lived? life without a father was fine for xahi. he and his mother were living just well so there was nothing to worry about. that was until his mother left him a letter that detailed everything he never thought he would know about his father when she passed away. his perception about his father changed. he was not his father, surely. he was no courageous young man who joined the army because he thought fighting the enemy at the front lines to defend his town was righteous. no, xahi was surely the opposite of his father and this information is quite tough for him to handle. he could not be courageous like him and open up to other people with the same warmth as he did but now that he's known his father's true colors and his mother has left him, perhaps the time for a change in scenery or environment has arrived. perhaps it was the push xahi needed to figure out what he wanted and what he could do in life, courtesy of coming to terms with his curiosity about his father.

➼ MRS. KYARIN mother (50 at time of death) / compassionate, wise, humble / 9/10

due to the death of his father, xahi only had his mother to depend on and as if she also knows that fact, xahi grew up receiving much love and affection from her despite their humble living circumstances. however, xahi did not care about it because he believed in her and himself. he promised her that he'd work hard to help her and that she has him so she need not to worry. xahi grew up seeing her as the greatest person in the world and if you were to ask him now, he'd still see her the same way because he may not have the same bravery to leave her birthplace, gaoling, to be with the person she loved. perhaps, he's never told her this verbally but xahi has always kept mental notes whenever she's in pain, in need of a massage or a break or when she just needs a hug. he always pays attention even if she doesn't know that and because of that, he always wanted to lessen her burden and help her out even by a bit. that's why xahi's mindset changed as he realized her deterioting health. he has to learn how to live without her little by little and be able to fulfill all he's ever wanted with her. what he did not expect was that he'd wake up to the news that she was not breathing due to a heart attack. the way he had to say farewell to her was sudden, unexpected like sudden rain that mocked the sun. however, somehow, after the tears were wiped, xahi had no regrets. she had lived better than anyone could ever do in her circumstances and he, too, grew up the way he is thanks to her so there will always be an overwhelming wave of emotions that comes to his being whenever he remembers her.

➼ GENERAL RAHUO former superior (55) / earth kingdom army / pragmatic, ambitious, taciturn, strong-headed / 4/10

the man who hired him will always have a lasting first impression because upon his first day reporting to the family confines, general rahuo gave him a stern briefing about his job before ordering one of the house maids to show him around the house in order for him to familiarize himself with the layout. the sharp look in his eyes was the opposite of the look sheva had when they first met which he often mentions to sheva in a joking tone. other than that, there is not much to say about general rahuo because unlike sheva, xahi knew nothing of his attitude in a personal setting even if sheva often verbalizes her irritation or annoyance towards him. though the fact that he was a general itself was enough for xahi to have respectful eyes for sheva's father, xahi chooses not to rate the general in his mind. every now and then, general rahuo would summon him separately to ask of sheva as a concerned father. he'd ask if she was studying well, if she enjoyed being able to wander the town for a while, if she was eating well and if she seemed fine. that's when xahi realized the rather shaky or rather confusing relationship between them. it made him wonder at times, were all elites like this with their family? several times during grand parties or gatherings where he has to watch over sheva, xahi had received grateful regards or a compliment from general rahuo who said he was glad xahi was the one watching over sheva and that he was doing a great job. xahi wonders if his sentiments still remained the same as after helping her run away from ba sing se, he chose to go with her while continuing to keep her safe.

➼ YOUNG LADY SHEVA principal: person being protected (25) / female elite by day, tinkerer by night / more in her app / 10/10

for xahi there is a lot to say about the young lady that is sheva because through knowing her, he's seemed to have known himself better. what started as a job that is strictly professional was quickly changed by sheva's compassion. there has always been something to sheva, in xahi's eyes, as if wherever her feet led her to go, there would always be a cool breeze and flower petals falling as the sun hit her face just perfectly. it wasn't a particular moment, really, that made him realize he had thawed around her as the accumulative time they spent being around each other would've led him to do so sooner or later. forging a personal, more intimate bond with sheva was never in xahi's books but sometimes, life just does its ways and for all the times he spent with her, there was never moments of discomfort. sheva is, after all, a good person that xahi could never understand. even more when he hears from the house maids that sheva had always been a distant person who questioned to trust others. xahi thought they were describing a different person as the sheva he knew was not at all distant or questioning to which they told him, how could she when she specifically wanted him to guard her out of all the other candidates? he's never shared that information to sheva but it made him understand her more: she does not easily trust others and that once you are chosen, she believes in you with all her kind heart. for xahi, to be around someone like sheva and experience the moments they've shared has caused him to feel a lot of emotions for her: admiration, grattitude, wonder and perhaps most recently, endearment. xahi often wonders to himself, what would he be without her? whatever answer he decides on in the future, xahi knows that she's become the source of meaning, purpose and energy to his life now.

SKillset

WEAPON HANDLING:

➼ to make amends for him being a non-bender, mastering how to wield weapons was the primary goal of his training so xahi has become accustomed and skilled in using all sorts of weapons such as butterfly sword, dual broadswords, katana, naginata, spears, bows and daggers that's commonly used across the earth kingdom. personally, his main choice of weaponry is a jian sword while keeping a couple daggers hidden under his calves for backup. 

HAND-TO-HAND COMBAT, PERCEPTION:

➼ due to him being a non-bender, hand-to-hand combat had become one of his strong points during training as whatever the enemy, he'd have to be able to engage in physical confrontations. with his trained perception of the battle field or terrain that requires spacial awareness and a good ear, he has become capable of sensing or anticipating bending attacks so that he is not taken aback.

KNOWLEDGE OF SAFETY FIRST AID AND MEDICINE:

➼ as he was training in a private firm that specializes in guarding the elites, he didn't expect to be trained to have basic knowledge of first aid or medicine at all. the knowledge he obtained was so that in emergency situations of unexpected circumstances, he would be able to prevent serious injuries or even death through lifesaving techniques. xahi knows how to treat burns, bleeding, sprains and shock due to the training in basic medicines. he does not know how to further treat them, though, as he was only taught the techniques to tend to blood or muscle injuries in order to stop the pain. outside of his formal training, his experience over the years having to take care of himself and/or his mother has made him understand how to treat fevers, flu, indigestion and others.

COOKING:

➼ not a combative skill, it is what xahi calls "life skill" as he had helped his mother cook and if she was busy working, he had to be able to feed himself. the years he spent doing that has made him a competent cook. turns out, it proved handy when he had to tend to sheva who did not know anything about cooking. he may be a bit clumsy with his seasoning but that's where sheva comes in.

Are You Ready?

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT WAR?

➼ in ba sing se: "there is no war in ba sing se. if this question is about my personal philosophy or views, then a word that represents disaster, despair and angst like war should prompt a negative impression to those who hear it. i am no exception. luckily, there is no war in ba sing se, right?"

➼ in gaoling: "well, now, first thing's first: there is indeed a war outside of ba sing se. the war took the life of my father, the prospects of a stable life in another town, an alternate life where my family was complete and fine. so, here i ask you back, how would you think i feel? which one is it, despair, angst or anger? or... is it all of the above?"

DO YOU THINK IT WILL END SOON? DO YOU WANT IT TO?

➼ in ba sing se: "if there is, in theory, a war, then it will end when it is the time to do so. if i were a party who is at pain due to the war, of course i'd want it to end. is that not logical enough?"

➼ in gaoling: "of course, i do. it wouldn't have been the wishes or hopes of my late father and mother that their son lives in a world still deep in war. so, i do think that the war will end and i sincerely want it to. perhaps, not as soon as it is hoped but sooner better than late and late better than never."

IF THERE IS A NEW AVATAR, IT WOULD BE SOMEONE FROM THE FIRE NATION. HOW WOULD YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT FACT?

➼ in ba sing se: "i assume from the notion of this question i should feel sentiments of resentment so if there was a new avatar, then perhaps things would be looking bleak for the world."

➼ in gaoling: "well, it seems like the fire nation would be dancing and assembling in delight if that's the case. as if to rub it in the faces of other nations after the death of the previous avatar. as if to boast their ego and superiority even more. truly a despicable sight for the eyes whose seen it."