I've been feeling really lonely the past year. I'm in tenth grade and in that phase where I'm looking for myself. I hate that saying. Rather than 'looking for myself' I want to 'unearth myself'. What I'm supposed to be is already who I am, I just haven't pressed the right button yet. But, that's only semi-relevant. I'm really jealous of everyone that has a best friend that's like a sister or a brother to them. I've yet to experience that feeling that you know what's going to come out of someone's mouth before they say it or that you can read their mind with a simple gaze. 

I also want to write and be happy and do all the things that I love. When I came to AFF I was so ecstatic to have people that shared the same passion as I did. Not just spazzing over shirtless pictures of our biases with our beloved fandoms because I truly believe that we're all writers first, fangirls second. I want a best friend, someone I'll have the strength to keep my eyes open for when they have something on their mind during ungodly hours of the night(or too-early morning). Whether that something be an idea for a story, a trouble they're having or some completely random thought that they need to get out. And beliving that they'd do the same for me.

I'm an awkward turtle because I'm awkward, first and foremost. But, I'm like a turtle in more ways than one. My developement in relationships is slow and steady. Deliberate and catious. I'm so hesitant to give people my heart because I don't want it manipulated and tossed around like a child's plaything. I play the defense easily and won't hesitate to crawl back in my shell. I want a partner in crime. I want someone that I can be a writer with, a goof with, a human with. Someone that I can tell my secrets to and someone that will trust me with theirs. 

My name is Timicia(it's long and something i used to hate but have come to adore). I like to call myself Mia because it's cute. I'm 15 y/o and my birthday is May 11th. I'm a taurus, bull-headed but loyal. I used to get beat up for being a black girl that never acted like one. I promise that I'll never hurt you. I've experienced too much of my own kind of hurt to garner the will to make anyone else go through it. I'm so optimistic you might want to throw me out of a window some day. It's okay, I'll understand.

If there's someone who understands my feelings and can reciprocate them then tell me about you. Let's be friends. Best friends. Too many people have left already. We're all we've got left. I'm lonely. I want a 'bat' to my 'mobile'. I want a 'bonnie' to my 'clyde'. Minus the felonies. 

(This probably sounds really desperate. It is.)