Something isn't right

I don't know what's wrong with me lately.. I feel lonely in spite of the fact that I've met many great new friends at work.. It's just the more I know, the more I feel that we're not fit with each other. I know being different is good at times but not if the differences are something principles. A good friend of mine told me once that I need a lover.. But then again, am I ready for that? Truth to be told, writing girl x girl stories too much has affected me in ways I can't explain. It scares me alright and It confuses me that I don't know what to do T.T What do I do? >.

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nekokawaii #1
just follow your heart author shi, only you will decide for your own happiness, dont mind what other people say that you should do this and do that, that's why it is called 'advice' for you to guide.. but not every words they say are totally true nor fit for you..

if they say 'you need a lover', for instance you have right now, well let me ask you, do you feel yourself whole? yes they fulfill your needs but they don’t make you, you. So, love yourself because you are the only person that can make yourself whole.

oh no what did i say? kkk~ sorry for my comment author shi >c< dont mind me :'((

btw, keep your spirit up, cos in the end, everything's gonna be alright!! ^_^
HWAITING♥
himeeeee
#2
I. Feel. The. Same.
JoeyTJ
#3
just do the things what u think is right, author. sometimes what people say is the least for us to listen, take them as a good advice yes but don't take it too seriously at the same time. people didn't know what we feel n what we through because they r not in our shoes. eventhou they will keep saying that they do 'understand' about us.
i just hope u're all alright author. lover, no matter what the gender is as long as it's love, i don't think it is wrong.
hwaiting author!!! take care...
kimwaffle #4
Have you ever watch Van Wilder - Party Liasion? Theres a useful qoute and it goes something like this, 'dont take life too seriously,u will never get out alive'.

So Dukuro, live ur life, experience something u hvnt got d chance to experience,even making/reveling ur relationship with girls. U know its true when they say that Life is all about taking chances..good luxk
thequietone
#5
You have to think first, what confuses you the most and try to figure out what causes it and try to take a rest/break from it , think for awhile and also you really need someone , someone who can really understand you the most , actually im also kind of confused , and this confusion started when I became a shipper and started to read snsd fanfics , and up until now , im still trying to figure out what the heck happen? but I just choose to shrug it off everytime it crosses my mind coz I know I wont find any answer , and sooner or later its all just going to make sense :)

Fighting Author ssi!! :) :) :)
We're here for you !
snsdGe #6
its funny.....
i thought im the only one who experience this..
honestly im the only 1 hus a kpop fans in my group of friends. Sometimes its hard to deal with them cuz they're not a fan if they saw a kpop fans or anything related to korea they always
teased me and i feel embarass sometimes but they always support what ever i want.
i like girls and im a girl there are girls who like me but i dont like them cuz i like girls who looks
like soshi and ill be forever alone because theres only 1 soshis hehehehehehe but if you fall inlove you fall in love no matter who or what the person is just wait for the right time.
i admit i envy other sones who spazz soshi wid their friends :( even in fb or twitter im afraid my friends will block me hahahaha i did that one time and here them talking about it hehehehehe.
but still i love my friends and they love me ♥. ill be forever a soshi fan but time will come ill get over with this syndrome (i dont know what to call it).
Soshi are just so jjang i dont know whats with them that i love them so much.
but one thing i know y i do love soshi its because of sone they are the ones who made the videos on youtube that started me to love them.
sone jjang♥
just enjoy this fandom its so fun XD
RuthieWuf
#7
In my cae, My friends know that I'm SNSD fan but they didn't know part of me that write/read fanfic and almost obsess with them. I prefer sitting in front of my computer rather than hang out with my friends. And because of that my friends has distancing themself from me. It didn't bother me much but I REALLY wish to hv someone that I can share the other part of me and share all my interest. I want to be myself. I don't want to keep this secret alone. But no matter how much I wish, I think its impossible to find that person. My interest is different from them and I think its not normal. That's make me feel lonely. When I think it back, i shouldn't hv involve in this fandom in the 1st place. but it is too late to say that and I can't turn back time. I'm trying to accept who am I now and do what I like to do to make me feel better. because i believe this is just a phase. As the time pass, maybe i wont confuse anymore and I will leave all this and open up to other people.

I don't know how to help you. but I think you need someone to talk to. I mean a friend that you can trust, that you can share what u like and show the real you. It's hard to find someone like that but it but maybe it can makes you feel better. (I believe all your readers willing to be your friends) Cooping too much in fantasy world sometimes makes you confuse with reality. Maybe you should take a rest from reading or writing fanfic. I know it's hard to do that but maybe you can limit your time and try to hang out more with your friends? Sorry I couldn't help much but I wish you good luck in your life :)
medic45
#8
And I think , I probably question my existence if taeny isnt REAL !!! Haha taeny is the real problem . Shipping them takes a lot of energy in me and I dont mind at all ! :p Trololo. Anyway, cheer up ! Just enjoy ur life :)
medic45
#9
Trust me, u r nt the only one who felt like this. Im also battling this issue by myself, like I cant tell ppl what I feel and I will nvr tell. Sometimes, I dun feel like hanging out with mu friends and I just wanna stay inside my room cause I feel like I have commited a sin if they know what is my preferences. Its nt even allowed in my county and for sure, my family gonna kill me! Lol im being too drmatic am I . Hahaha. I also confused about myself .probably I read too much fanfic and i feel like my life revolves around snsd n 2ne1. Please dont think too much and take a break ok ! Just spent doing things that u like for urself.
hananam #10
Follow your happines,it doesn't matter how people will react on that but what matter is that you live your life to the fullest. Remove those "what ifs" and be positive. You can do it author. ALL IS WELL!
spookytaeng #11
I think you should refresh your brain, take a rest of writing girl x girl story, one day without internet, sleep more! try to write girl x boy story, you can use soshi member as a character, maybe gender bender or a man from other character.. I feel lonely too, because I have no social life right now.. well, I hope you'll find out what's your problem, just do everything that make you happy, hwaitaeng! ^^9
joyheartsoshi
#12
I feel that too :'(
one of my friend told me 'eventhough you hve great friends with you there is always someone who will make you feel happy every second of the day' and I think she means is for me too find a special someone

another thing author ssi give yourself a break to help you think things over and over :) it will help a lot promise,, i always do that :))
liazk01
#13
I feel the same >.<
barbietaengoo #14
i feel so lonely althougi i have a lot of friends. I think i just need someone special in my life.
hollowseen #15
This is just a story author, dont get influence, u must can split between reality and story. I think u should take a break, not write a story and enjoy ur social life and make a relationship, follow ur heart and not ur story :)