When you are feeling too tired, you must remember your idol.

That is, the idol whom you were once so crazily in love with.
That is, the idol whom you used to memorise their facts faster than memorising new vocab.
That is, the idol whom you used to write about, about how much you love them on your blog.
That is, the idol whom you are able to type his/her name on the keyboard even with your eyes closed.

You must be thankful, but at the same time clearheaded.
When someone forcefully asks you, what on earth made them worthy of you wasting your youth on them,
you must tell him.
I only gave my most beautiful memory to them, but they gave up more precious stuff than me during that period of youth.

When you are on the field under the hot sun for physical training,
you need to remember, your idol once perspired profusely in the practice room for you.
When you are sitting in class, with absolutely no interest in the textbook,
you need to remember, your idol once, for the rehearsal, hurt his/her vocal cords.
When you are sprawling on your bed, complaining about how tough your day was,
you need to remember, your idol had to perform on stage for you despite running a high fever, or sitting in a wheelchair.

He is your idol.
We might not be on the same land breathing the same air, but we can feel each other.
Since he did it, why can't you

When you can't hold on, you must remember your idol.

Running on the track, your ears filled with hot air and unbearable panting.
Your friend is at the end point shouting the name of your idol, you must grit your teeth, you must dash over.
He is your destination, he is your strength.

Your secret crush has someone else in mind, and your shy love letter hasn't even been handed over.
You lock yourself up in your own room, looking at the posters of him who is still the same, choking up on your tears.
Nevermind, I still have you, you.

This world, perhaps exist betrayal, escapism, depression and all sorts of unhappiness.
As long as you open Twitter everyday, and start browsing through his updates.
You chuckle; sitting in front of the computer. Remember, that is the real you.

Your idol,
might have underwent all sorts of incidents, or maybe an accident, even the doctors said there is no hope.
Some of the members might have done something wrong, even some fans said they will not love them anymore.

Maybe time has diminished some of his popularity, even those who don't really follow him say he is not popular anymore.
Maybe his company never thought of putting in efforts in their promotions, with no intentions of further plans.
At that time, at that moment, how did he survive?

Although fans had committed mistakes, idols, too. He has his own shortcomings, problems, or even have many people looking down on him.
Although he is not perfect, but you have to be thankful.

When you have your own love, you must remember your idol.
After entering adulthood, you finally have your own life.
He, too, might already have his own. Be it happy, be it blissful.

That past years of missing lessons to watch his concert,
that past years of squeezing in front to buy tickets,
that past years of pasting posters all over the wall,
that past years of scribbling his name all over the textbooks.

You might have been crazy before,
but when you recall those years, you need to be proud, because that is one of a kind, something others don't have.

You protect him, forsaking your own limelight.
You devote your love towards him, no longer thinking about other guys, but also at the same time developing rationality and your own perception towards life.
Looking at him, from being a teen to adult, with stubby moustache growing out of his cheeks, with wrinkles on his face when he smiles.
That is the traces of your love, which has undergone the vicissitudes of life, so thunderous.

So what if you are old, you need to be proud, because you experienced the purifying of time.
He stood for you, for you.
When he announces that he found his other half.
You cried, you teared. Because he has reached the shore, you are finally at ease and assured.
The position where you once dreamed of being at, someone has stood there in your place, for you.

So many years, you watched him fall and stand up on his own.
You finally feel relieved, that he has shoulders to lean upon.
Just that there is a little, just a little tinge of regret. Why, the one giving him happiness, is not your ownself.

You have to remember your idol.
Those years, the person who has been giving you your happiness, rage, sorrow and joy..The one controlling your mind.
Even if he no longer appears on the screens of your TV, your handphone screen still, is filled with memories.
Even if his name no longer appears on the fashion magazines, your diary still, is filled with doodles and love.

Seeing how he shines on stage, dancing,
standing under the spotlight, talking to us and smiling with a microphone,
the way he stands on the steps, crying when he heard the fans singing along,
the way he receives the award and look at the cheering crowd,
and the first time, seeing him and forgetting about time.
No matter where time goes, in your heart, he is always, like that.

You must remember your idol.
You once boasted about his good, despite receiving disagreeing looks on the faces of the people around you.
Your blog is full of his news,
just to let people who understand you, know how blissful it is to like him.

You once quarreled with others because of him.
You don't cry when people scold you, throw things at you, but your eyes turn red when someone is just badmouthing them.
On what basis, you ask, since they don't understand him, how dare they think they have the rights to criticise them.
He is your life.
You hid under your blankets, crying, because of him. Having wild thoughts in the middle of the night,
how has he been, how was his injuries, what did he meant when he said that.
Tired, after a short nap you wake up and continue to love him.
You are not afraid of anything, so long as he is there.

Some people in this world might be physically close to you, but can never understand why you like him.
You must tell them, the word "fortitude" is not something that can be taught by anyone.
And he, gave you this precious thing.

So, you must remember your idol.

Dear, since now we are still young.
You have to work hard, to become someone worthy of him,
to be able to meet him someday, and stand next to him deservingly.
You must, must tell him personally.
You must tell him that you are thankful that you didn't miss him, in the midst of billion of people.
Thank him for his companionship for the past few years, whether be it crying or laughing.
You must, deeply, with that choked up voice of yours, carefully, shout his name.
-- I used to, love you, that, that, that much.

[Even if time has passed, don't worry, the white-haired me will remember the black-haired you, while loving the white-haired you.]

by:蓝爵Yoyo
trans by: @exonyeoshidae