The incident is already way past me but I just want to voice out my mind because it still haunts me.

I don't like opening up to people because they always have a tendency to mess with me and ruin my plans, worse try to fix me up. Look. I opened up to you just because I thought I need to let it out. I don't need any help. I don't need an opinion. I don't need comfort. I just needed you to listen. Because when you try to ruin it, I'll just go all way out and ruin it myself just to stop you. I'll do it myself. I tend to self destruct and ruin everything if anyone tries to mess with my life and that was what happened.

No one really understands me and I don't beg for someone to be able to. Recently, someone approached me and told me to try opening up to her and she'll understand. But no. I tried so many times with many people and all were lies. I am not underestimating you, but do you think I have not tried opening up before?

I am sad and broken and nothing or no one can ever fix me up. Just please, stop pitying me. I appreciate your concern but please, don't force me to something I am uncomfortable with. It's frustrating. You're making it sound like I'm stupid human garbage needed to be sorted out.