THANK YOU FOR EXISTING BTS~ (I'm nothing without U)

 

HAPPY 7th Anniversary Bangtan Sonyeondan!!!!

First off, let me Congratulate Bangtan Sonyeondan, one of my favorite boy groups in the music industry for making it this far and this long in living their dreams!!! 

They deserve more than a big round of applause!!! hahhaha

I still remember the times when they were low on budget with every comeback and all the haters throwing stones at he boys. But look at them now, they are bow one of the most successful and "looked up'ed" Boy groups in the KPOP World. And as one of the earliest (not too early actually) A.R.M.Y.s, I am very very very proud of them. 

So, I've congratulated them already XD, What's my deal now? haha. Here's what;

I'm writing this as a thanks for the boys! I WANT TO THANK THEM FOR EXISTING HAHAHA !!!! If not for them, I dont think I'd still be here writing this piece XD (I'm not even joking haha) Not even sure if they'd be able to read this or not, but at least I want other people to know how much Bangtan Sonyeondan helped me with their music.

Now, here's my story...

I met BTS way back 2014, when I was in my eight grade. At that time, they were in the Skool Luv Affair era as it was released just a few days back. I could say that BTS is what lured me in the KPOP World (ofc I do know EXO, SUJU, SNSD, BIGBANG & Boyfriend, oh as well as 2ne1, personally love these group, but those weren't enough to make me drown in the KPOP World haha)

As a young child, up to the present days during that time, I could say that my Social Life was boring as i was a victim of bullying during my elementary days and I've got severe trust issues (this is real guys) so I don't mingle with other people very much and I don't trust easily. 

So most of the time, my routine was like this— wake up in the morning, go to school, do my home works after going home, and repeat. Yeah, repeat and repeat and repeat. I was used to doing things that are expected of me I felt like I'm a marionette used to please people around me. I don't like the faces people make when they feel disappointed in me. Now don't get me wrong, guys, it wasn't my parents' fault. It was more like 'what the society expects from me' and 'the standards of the society'. 

I came from a very poor school, and that alma matter was being belittled by everyone in the district because that school was very poor. So the teachers were so passionate to prove that what people were saying was wrong. And since I was a consistent honor student, I was always one of the ace of the school when it comes to competitions in the district. Though my classmates saw otherwise. They thought I was a teacher's pet and that I was an honor student because teachers favor me. Now, guys, this is not true. 

I've got proof that what I achieved is genuine. My Older sister as well as my younger brother, also graduated with honors so it's quite safe that it runs in the blood right? Not only that, my parents were also consistent honor students back in their times. 

Another thing, I really really love performing on stage so I would often join dance and singing performances back in the days. Just like earlier, my classmates would talk and make fun of me  behind my back. I thought they ere friends so I would still play with them only to learn what they were doing behind me. 

That's why when I've reached fourth grade, I've stopped joining stage performances and my teachers would always ask me why when I used to always join dancing and chorale singing before. Of course I couldn't tell them the reason. That being told, the teachers would think I'm becoming picky and choosy and would often get disappointed in me. I would always end up feeling guilty. 

Since then, I've started fearing people. I was always wary of strangers and would always be cautious as to not have anything said against me. It was tiring and scary for me, but what can I do? I'm an ugly soul in this wrecked world? The only choice I've got is to go with the flow. 

Now, back to what I'm telling you guys earlier,  I would just get my own satisfaction watching Anime's, reading books, writing, and being alone. When people around me are having the time of their lives, I was living mine in misery. 

That all changed when I met BTS. For a first time fan, I've also did what most would, I've searched their profiles online hihi and knew little by little about them haha..

From their names, their age, birthdates as well as their heights. hahah I knew them all. At that time, I was so proud of myself. Next, I started downloading and streaming every videos about them. Aside from the music videos and dance practices, one of the first videos I've watched was ROOKIE KING BANGTAN and I fell in love with them more. 

I became a fan and supported them with everything I have hahaha (actually no because I can't afford goods, posters and such aside from streaming every Bangtan Bomb XD). 

Then Bangtan started becoming more famous, a lot people watched their performances and I became very very proud of them (le cries T.T) 

So, how thankful was I to them? 

NUMBER 1, I could relate very much to their song 'No more Dream' and I almost gave up my life because everything was so exhausting. I felt like a marionette and felt like this life wasn't mine to begin with. I'm letting people dictate me of what to do when in fact I'm not supposed to.

NUMBER 2, Somewhere during 2014, my parents got a divorce and we started living together with my mother. For a child who looks up to her father very much, of course I was very heartbroken about this but I know the reason of the fight very well so I'm not taking sides to this matter. Nevertheless, I was happy to have my parents. 

Bangtan's music were always healing to my soul especially when I search the meaning of the lyrics in the internet. In a way, their songs became my sanctuary. 

NUMBER 3, In the year 2016 after turning 18, My mother met another love of her life and would always choose him before us and would often leave us alone to fend for ourselves. During this time, I was working in a part time job and things are very hard for us, (not gonna talk about it anymore, or I might end up crying). Long story short, I fell onto a mild depression and Bangtan's Songs would always calm the storms in my head and if they didn't existed, I don't know where I am today, or if I'm still here. They saved me every single time that when I feel down or dangerous about myself, I plug in my earphones and listen to the songs they made for the youth.

NUMBER 4, When the song 'On' was released and saw the Meaning of the lyrics and the Video, I could say that it was like Bangtan and Me was able to finally, finally, Love Ourselves. Whatever we've been through, we ended up realizing that having no dream at all doesn't restrict you from living this life. It's your own, and you only live once. There's no such thing as 'too late' because everything is in your hands, it's just a matter of taking risks. 

Anyways, I don't know if I making any sense but U want to thank them for existing and bringing light to my dark world. I know I'm not making any sense as it's all chaotic inside me right now. But words can never express how much I'm indebted to Bangtan Sonyeondan. I've got so many things to say but I'll just summarize it in a few words. 

"I LOVE YOU BANGTAN SONYEONDAN!!!! KEEP FLYING WITH YOUR BEAUTIFUL WINGS TOO IN THE NEXT  SUCCEEDING YEARS!!! THANK YOU FOR EXISTING! THANK YOU FOR SINGING FOR THE YOUTH!!!!" 

 

Comments

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laidbacknewbie
#1
@VanillaSugarARMY
💚 thank you!!!! They're great, right? ^.^
VanillaSugarARMY
#2
ngl that legit made me tear up, though each of us obviously has our own story, there were big parts where i could relate. aaaahh today is an emo day for me looking back on our journey with bangtan ;; i'm so thankful for them for helping me come this far. thank for sharing this blog and your journey with us
laidbacknewbie
#3
💚 thanks for the love chingu~ I just want others to know how much I love BTS ^.^ I also want them to know that I'll stand by them and support them.
QueenMoona
#4
That was awesome of you to share your Bangtan or your kpop story. It's nice that we can have things whether it's music, books, movies, etc. that we can relate to or that comfort us during those hard times. Thankyu for sharing your story my dear friend 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜