FINAL NOTE: "Amour Interdit"

**PLEASE READ ONLY AFTER FINISHING THE STORY "AMOUR INTERDIT"**


Amour Interdit is a story very close to my heart, and a source of pride. 
I started writing it on May 22, 2016 after a close friend Bun gave me the idea for it: The Great Gatsby themed SuLay. From that moment on, I was transformed as a writer: this story in particular took a lot of research, care, and constant editing in the middle of the night. Before I knew it, I had built a world I was very invested in, and a book that showed perhaps my best prose writing. 

I had built a world via blueprints, notes in my phone, scribbles in the back of a college notebook, and exploring various ways to reach the pre-destined ending that Bun and I decided the same day the thought for this story came about. 

But unfortunately, I hit a horrible drought of writer's block that coincided with me leaving AFF. I always felt regret towards that phase, particularly towards this story gathering dust on a forgotten shelf. But one day, I decided to complete this story on June 24, 2019 and gift it to my friend Sora, and within a week, I proofread, edited, and wrote the last two Arcs. 

Arcs One and Two were an absolute pleasure to write. I thoroughly enjoyed writing SuLay's love and TaoLay's interactions. In fact, I was so invested in the story, that I even considered writing a TaoRis spin-off exploring events even after Amour Interdit's end.

Arcs Three and Four were difficult to write, because I had to build up on strife and threat, suspense and the growing restlessness. Most of all, it was difficult to write because it meant the end of an era. 

Coming to the end of Amour Interdit, the end was pre-destined. In the world Bun and I built, there was no other possible end for our dear lovers. It personally pained me to write the final scene, but harking back to a scene where they save themselves a place amongst the stars, I'd like to think they're pursuing their love free of prejudice and rash decisions, and that Alyona is safe and happy with the cook or by herself. I never thought I'd get attached to Alyona, but I did. It was also difficult to write her final scenes, especially as she did absolutely nothing to deserve the young Zhang's wrath. 

I considered it - writing an alternate ending where Alyona, Yixing, and Junmyeon are alive and well with their lovers, but this particular ending was all I knew, and as a writer, I personally couldn't see any other end for them. It was the best I could justify: Yixing had to be punished for murdering Alyona, and he was punished by Fate. Junmyeon wouldn't want to go on without Yixing, so the best remedy for his soul, at least by his own standards, would be to join Yixing in his punishment. The fact that their uality was what actually pushed them into Fate's hands and not Yixing's crime primarily isn't something I personally agreed with, of course, but I had to stay true to the times and the characters. The story was set in the 1900s, where homouality was condemned via prison sentences, as mentioned in the story via the references to Oscar Wilde. Junmyeon and Yixing facing social prejudice and hatred, and being sent to jail would have been a much lesser, much more ideal punishment perhaps, but it must be kept in mind that both of them would have faced something much worse at a homophobic Huangfu's own hands for bringing shame onto the Zhang mafia family. 
So all things considered, I realised that the way Amour Interdit ended was perhaps the best, the most poetic ending I could have granted to the two lovers. 

This is a book of many things. Of the age-old tale of forbidden love, of a dreamy-eyed writer embarking on yet another flight of fantasy, of giving up, of death and rebirth, and of unfailing support through it all. This book is also a personal victory and source of pride for me as a writer, and I can only hope that you, my reader, enjoyed this journey. 

Thank you for having stuck through the book, and for supporting me as a writer!


 

Comments

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fiqahaina #1
Yep I understand it unnie and im so gladd u finished it up with amazing ending eventhough it heartbroken huhuhu. Thank you authornim!! Hwaiting with anything you wanna do in your lifee! <3
celestemoon #2
Thank you so much for a wonderful experience!!