I'm trying but it's hard to update as normal, under the circumstances. 

I can't believe we've lost another artist, and I'd be lying if I said that it hasn't affected me. Don't worry about me, though... I'm pretty open about my battle with depression, but I think I'm strong enough now to know that it's not the answer. As a friend put it, taking your own life doesn't take the pain away--it only spreads it around. I'll be damned if I let the people around me carry this burden instead of me. I'm better off dealing with it myself. 

Anyway, this isn't a woe is me post. I swear. 

I'm angry, more than anything.

This stupid disease has taken too much from all of us, even those who are fortunate enough to never know its grips. I don't know what else we can do to combat it. I know people are passing the blame around... SM... Knetz... Whoever. But I don't blame anyone else but the disease itself. People seem to forget that it's an illness. Even if things around us are 100% happy and comfortable and to our liking, the darkness would still swallow us whole. It doesn't respect age, or status, or anything at all. If you have it, it will come for you with all its strength. Luckily, there have been so many advances in medicines and therapy but the catch is, it all means nothing if the person him/herself is not ready to take on the grueling task of recovery. What a stupid predicament we find ourselves in. 

It's such a shame. Such a waste. 

I'm really doing my best to go on with updating as normal, but I find that everything I'm churning out is angsty. And this is the reason. I just felt I owe you all an explanation for the wait.

I'm gonna hold off on updating until I can get my emotions under control. I don't really want it to seep into my stories, and that's a bit hard for the time being. For now, take good care of yourselves, lovelies. Be kind to yourself. Do things that make you happy. Listen carefully to those around you. Remember that there is someone out there that loves you more than you love yourself, as Jinki said. I'd like to think he's right about that.