I was raised in a family where dogs are considered part of the family ( It's something that I really love about my family). We have two dogs that we adopted last year , both were Aspins ( a breed of dog in the Philippines formerly known as Askals), we named them Lexy and Charlie. I wanted to name them Mingyu and Wonu but my mom finds it hard to remember their names because it's Korean hahahahaha. Our youngest dog, Charlie, died last January 9, 2019, she wasn't even a year old, it started out with a bad cold, eventually, she started having seizures. Everything happened so fast, it all happened in just one day. These are the times I regret becoming a dog lover, seeing my dog in pain, fighting for his/her life is heartbreaking. I love music videos with dogs in it, but after what happened to our dog ( our baby) Charlie, I couldn't watch Marshmello's mv " Happier" without even crying. 

Here's the worst part, a week after Charlie died, our other dog, Lexy started getting sick as well. She also had a cold but thankfully, it only lasted for two days ( all thanks to the medicines the vet suggested), but what bothers me is this, she cries in pain and doesn't want anyone to be near her. At first, Lexy was scared of my mom touching her, then she got scared of my brother, eventually, Lexy also got scared of me and wouldn't let me touch her. I thought maybe she's sensitive because she's still recovering from the flu. And we noticed that she's probably depressed from Charlie's death. Lexy keeps on coming back to the room where she last saw Charlie. The vet told us that we should keep on talking to Lexy, dogs are just like humans, it will lessen the anxiousness they're feeling. And it's true, we started comforting our Lexy with sweet words, telling her how much we love her and that everything will be okay. Days after, our Lexy became our sweet Lexy again, she lets us touch her, and she even looks so happy when we touch her.

I thought, everything will be okay, Lexy is back to her old sweet self, she eats a lot again, she didn't have problems with bladder and bowel control.But suddenly, her lower limbs couldn't function well. Suddenly, Lexy had a hard time walking. The vet said she had Intervertebral Disk Disease ( Type II IVDD),  Intervertebral disc disease (IVDD) occurs when the cushioning intervertebral discs between the vertebrae of the spinal column become displaced, deteriorate, bulge out, rupture, or burst (herniate) into the spinal cord space. When this happens, the discs press on the nerves that run through the spinal cord, which can cause pain, nerve damage, and in severe cases, paralysis. She got that because according to our neighbor, Lexy's mom, accidentally fell on her when she was a puppy, damaging her intervertebral disks. 

Lexy tried her best to walk like a normal dog, but it's really hard for her, her limbs are trembling. We're still thankful that she still has a strong appetite and drinks a lot of water, but day by day, we easily noticed that it takes her a long time to stand, and it frustrates her. I always told Lexy, " Take your time, we're not in a rush", making her feel that we're in this together, that we got each other's back. Eventually, things will get worst, her lower limbs will stop working, it will end up in paralysis. The only option is surgery, which is out of the question, because WE.DON'T.HAVE.MONEY,  we love her, God knows how much we love Lexy, but me and my siblings have our own jobs, my mom is getting old, if the time comes that Lexy's lower limbs succumbs into paralysis,  our option would be putting her to sleep, and let her crossed the " rainbow".

If only, i'm rich enough to afford the surgery,  I've been crying for days, my heart breaks everytime I saw Lexy falling down, hitting our walls because she couldn't control how she walks. I'm like a mom in pain because my daughter is struggling to continue to go on like a normal doggo. Can you guys help me, I need help, as simple as comforting words, telling me what I should do, how to handle the pain, the heartbreak would really mean a lot to me. Because I'm at the stage where i'm emotionally struggling because of my dog, I need some help, a support system because this is hard for me, and I had no idea what to do...