As many of you don't know, we lost an amazing soul , and someone apart of SHINee on December 18, 2017.

 

 

My thoughts: 

 

 

 

I, as a huge fan of SHINee and an avid writer on this site, I can't honestly believe this news. I'm heartbroken, and can barely type or write anything without crying at the mention of his name. After being with SHINee for 6 years SHINee has always been my favorite group and one of the reasons I got into kpop.

Jonghyun was an amazing personwith the most loving heart and a passion to make other people happy with his music. As a listener of him for quite some time, I just can't believe it. 

 

He suffered from depression, and I understand that. I have suffered with anxiety and depression  myself as I doubted myself like he did. I had stressfull days and sleepless nights.

 

Life of idols are hard. I understand. Everyone excpects them to be perfect and have these picture perfect lives. The crimson life that you only see in movies. When its actually not like that at all. Idols are humans to, and suffer from lots of pain and hard training just to get where they are.
 

LGBT community support. Jonghyun supported the LGBT Community and got so much hate for it. Why can't people just love who they love without anyone else's backlash? I rememeber Jonghyun going into the X-Room and crying so much for how much hate and suffering he went through.

 

The kpop industry is so dark, people don't realize how bad it actually is. Companies treat their idols like dog-bait when idols only want to spread love.

 

So, he sadly decided to take his own life, as stated above. Everyone is so devestated at his passing, he died so young. 27 is not the age to die. Three years before he could turn 30. Man that is so young. I am crying so much right now. I have cried myself to sleep these past two nights. I was able to attend the memorial and pay my rescpects. I haven't took any pictures. I didn't want to. I couldin't even keep my eyes open to see the famous stars there. I did not care. My eyes were swollen and one of my close friends was worried about me. I felt as if my heart expolded in a million pecies as the famous star I loved was gone.

 

It's sad to know that we will never hear his angelic voice that brought so many people joy and happiness ever again. But he will remain in our hearts forever, I know this. I am just worried about SHINee's other members who are taking this hard as well. I can imagine someone who you've lived with, shared memories with, made beautiful music with, is gone. I am taking this so hard right now I can barely even think. I can't even listen to a single SHINee song because when Jonghyun/'s parts come on, I cry every time.

 

My message to him:

 

Jonghyun, my little petite, you have inspired so many hearts and souls until the day you past away. You have left a legend that is so big, the bond will always be there. I will always be a shawol and continue to support SHINee, without you there is like a missing puzzle peice, but hopefully SHINee will be able to continue making music. You will always be there, no matter what. I know it. We haven't lost you, but we have gained such a special angel. I know you wouldin't want me to cry. You said you don't want any of us to blame ourselfs for your death, but I just can't help think "I could have been the one that saved you.". I am so sorry Jonghyun. You have always been there for me, even if you don't even know me, as creepy as this sounds, I love you lots and hope you will continue to sing up there in heaven with the angels. It's where you belong. Please wait for the other memebers to join in your song, when there time comes. I know I'll see you someday again. Your probably singing monkey magic just waiting for the others to join :)

 

You are a legend jonghyun. AND I hope that this will be a lesson and shows how companies need to be more lenient or carefull with thieir idols. Depression and mental illnesses are not something to be skipped on. I know that now. You have changed my views on Kpop, as it I have realzied this after you have died. But it was for the positive and I know you don't want me crying but it is so hard not being able to hear your voice anymore. I can watch old variety shows but that just won't help. I need your new ablum you were working on to be released. Just to hear you voice one more time is enough.

 

Rest in Peace my beautiful angel. You deserve it. 

 

You did well.