❝A Love That Cannot Be Conveyed ;
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                                   I can no longer find the same.

Remember the old times we have together? A lot of memories are still flashing in my mind over the past 8 years after we parted. They never leave me even until now. Is it my fault that made us apart? Or we aren't even fated...?
All along in my life, I always wanted to have someone to be my true guardian and angel, who is always there to stand up for me, giving me the warmth I want and never letting me go; but most importantly, knowing my pain, my scars, my fears, everything.
And I found you... who cared for me secretly, helped me even when I didn't ask, comforted and jested with me when I am down, made me feel safe and secured, and that my existence is special to you.
I remember the old times, they haunt me.

“Are you okay?" I felt a pat on my head. "I'll help you.” You gave your warm smile.
"You did well,” your eyes were smiling, they always did.
"No one is allowed to bully him!" you stood and warned them heroically.
"It's alright, everything is fine now~ I'm always here for you.” You assured me at times when I felt doubtful.

Those special moments, they are still here.

"We'll play next time. I promise!” playfully, you were continuously poking my head.
"Who bullied you? Tell me!" you said in a calm yet angry tone. You were furiously cute.
"Stop it! No one can lay a hand on him like that!” you yelled and guarded me as I stepped behind you.
"I'm sorry, I came late.” You were my hair. 
"Fighting!' I felt your hands running on my hair, they ruffled them.
"I won our competition!” you came running to me with a huge smile on your face, pulling me to a tight hug.

I remember them. 

All these memories always flutter me. I still feel the warmth you gave. They always make my heart beat for you and feel so secured the way you take care of me like a brother.
Honestly, I see you more than just my sister.
"I like you" 
"I want be with you, as someone more than just a brother to you."

These words can’t be told. I don't want affect us. All I do can is to admire and look from afar, acting all along to keep us the same. Of course... I plan to tell you one day, when I am ready…
But who knew that one day...

"Oh, noona. Finally! I miss you! I have something to tell you—Uh..." happiness faded slowly as I hear a different voice from the other line.
"Sorry, sir. She is already gone.."
"W-What? She—"
"Yes, I'm sorry." and the call ended.
"W-What..? S-She...” tears dripped on my face gradually making me feel lifeless. "This can't be.” being hopeless and speechless, I sob quietly.
My heart skipped. My mind went blank.

You are not only gone for other things that you told me you will be busy with. But gone to a far place without me knowing. "I love you", these 3 words that I wasn’t even able to tell you before you go.
Until now, even though I am lost; talking to myself sometimes as if you were here with me. I feel that pain in my chest as I cry myself to sleep at night. I'm tired of it. I still can't accept the fact that you are gone… forever.
I can't find someone same with you anymore. I can't find someone who can replace you in my heart. I can't feel myself, nor can I breathe…even my heart. I don't know anymore.

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✉(A/N).

This is one of the plots made for the 3rd Activity and 2nd Activity Check of Another Roleplay. 

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