Well how do I even  begin. So now that I am offically back. I am like actually excited to write again.That is what I am focusing on. 

I have been gone for a while. It was like august of last year..... But so many things have happend since then..... Like in my last blog post I talked about concerts..... My last at that time was KCON 2016... 

Since then I have been to 4 more..... CL Hello es Tour in NY, B1A4 4 Nights in the US NY, BAP Party Boom US NY, and most recently. ExorDium in NY!!!!!!

This time i prepared a few things. I went back looked for my "best" pictures and video. When in reality they are either in and out of focus, fancams are super shaky and so on and so forth. 

WARNING I AM SAYING THIS NOW MOST MY FANCAMS INCLUDE BAD ANGLE SHOTS. RANDOM CAMERA ROTATION (sorry i couldnt change the rotation of my videos so bare with me. You may have to tilt your phone or head) HORRIBLE SINGING AND MAYBE FAILED FANCHANTS. AND I REALLY TRIED I REALLY DID TRY BUT I COULD NOT FIND ONE FANCAM WHERE I AM NOT SCREAMING BLOODY MURDER I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR YOUR EARS. AND MY MILD SWEARING I AM SO SORRY 

 

So let me bring back my memories.... also another quick warning many caps and all that so i hope you dint mind. I am bring out my tears and fangirling i have been holding in. So yeah you have been warned....Lets begin!!

October 2016.... CL Hello ed Tour... My stop NY! When I heard CL was coming I almost didnt go. Me and my brother (my brother is my concert buddy we go to all the concerts together)  we were going back and forth if we should go or not. We felt concert deprived. I couldnt really afford the vip tickets so I just got regular GA tickets and i thought we were going to be all the way in the back. But we had a good view....  But my brother is just so nice he let people go in front of him so we got dragged by the crowd  -_-     I was able to hold my ground. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This was the ONLY GOOD PICTURE. All of them were just like wwwhhhyyyyyyyyy. I think if i remember correctly my phone was in full zoom. I had my old phone at the time. One good thing came from my phone. I being so short i was only able to see CL's head my phone at least caught some of her body????

But i loved my spot. Why? Because :
 

 

 

 

 

YESSS SANDARA WAS RIGHT ABOVE ME!!!! SHE WAS RIGHT THERE!!! I knew she was going to go to the NY stop. Me and my brother even joked about puming into Dara....... BUT I DIDNT EVEN THINK IT COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN!!!! I was enjoying the concert minding my own business and i see so many people taking pictures on my left side. I am like why are yall taking pictures of the wall CL is up there.... So I decide to look up AND I SEE DARA RIGHT THERE I AM LIKE WWWWHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA DARA DARA DARA OH MU GUAD I CANT!!!! I think i made noises that i never made before.

To be 100% honest. I was mainly watching Dara have so much fun. Since some tall couple decided to stand right in font of my for like half the concert I just admired Dara instead xD. I dont even remember most of the concert to be honest. All i can really remember is Dara xD

Here are 3 of my fancams (like i said sorry for the bad quality it wa the best ones i could find. with very minimal screaming and or signing.)

 

 

For CL if i think i was only in line for 3 hours and to get videos like this i think it was pretty good. The pit was not bad at all it was pretty decent compared to others..... So that was CL for me which was just amazing. I had planned it in a rush. I bought the tickets and the next day i was on the train to NYC i booked the best hotel i could (so goddamn expensive ( /-_-/) 

 

After CL I didnt go to a concert for another 4 months. Next is a very special concert for me so far. Back in 2014 i did a post on my very first kpop concert. October 3rd, 2014. That date i never forget. Even though now my memory of that day is very fuzzy i can not forget that day. I went see B1A4. It was my 18th birthday present. I didnt know anything about concerts. Now that i think back I did so many mistakes. I didnt know the difference about anything. I got their late. I wore the wrong clothes ughh it wa a mess. After i had gained some concert experiance I look back and think of my god why did i do this when i could have done this. But i always said if B1A4 come back i am going to make it right. I am going to put all my concert experience to the test and this was the result

 

 

   

These are just some of my pictures. I wanted to post more of them but.... i dont know i think i already posted to many... But yeah.....

3 years of concert experience PAID OFF!!! NOT ONLY WAS  I THIS CLOSE I GOT HI TOUCH. OKAY HERE COME THE WATER WORKSS. LIKE I CANT EXPLAIN THIS I CANT! 

I dont even know where to begin with this concert. it is a very special one for me. Every mistake i made when i first saw B1A4 i made up for it. To begin i got VIP tickets. Which included early enrty (which we didnt even get because powerhouse dont know how to handle their sh*t) and hi touch. The hi touch for me it may be be blurry in my memory but i still remember what 3 members said to me..... I told all the members i love them CNU and Jinyoung said thank you. BUT FREAKING BARO SANDUEL AND GONGCHAN SAID I LOVE YOU BACK I AM CRYING LEGIT TEARS!!! AND THAT ME AND BARO LOCKED HANDS!!! 

To be honest i didn't know Baro told me he loved me back (i was just so shocked we locked hands T.T) my brother was the one who told me that he loved me. And that made me cry even more. I was already a crying mess. I cried during the concert, i cried before the hi touch, (my brother handled me to get a hold of my self) and cried after. I was getting my coat form the coat check and was crying. 

i received so much fanservice. Let begin to tell you something. Gongchan was mainly at my side for most of the concert along with sandeul here is a fancam of how close he really was to me

 

Like yeah i cant..... And that isnt all.... The boy were doing the final talk of the night and I couldnt take it and let the tears out, Gongchan noticed and smiled at me throught me hearts and I tried to smile back i was most likely looked stupid half crying have smiling. Ughhh my feels. After that Gongchan was bias. He tried to calm me down.... he saw i was crying and tried to make me feel better. I need to learn how to control myself but i cant. ugh this is so hard..... 

But that isnt it. Sanduel....... He threw me hearts but a kiss..... AND I CAUGHT IT ON CAMERA!!!! And he was the first one to through me hearts. I was the only one in my area that was sending him hearts at the time and he threw one back at me!!!!!!!! 

Even though it was cold (Concert was on February 15th, 2017) it was so worth the long wait. I stood in line for over 10 hours. Its wasn't that cold for being February. 

Here are a few more fancams

 

So that is my 4nights in the US experience..... Ii went from back row on a balcony back in 2014 to 2 row behind right behind the barricade. It was just a wet and emotional concert..... (the boys threw bottles and bottles of water dont think wrong!) The pit was so nice. I think i was one that went a little too crazy xD

Next in line...... BAP Party Boom in NYC!!! Yes I went to see BAP again. AND IT WAS AMAZING!!!! Quick back story you guys have noticed i mention my brother. Well this was his concert, His ultimate bias group is BAP.  When we went to see BAP last year he was going through so much he was excited but not as excited as this year. Not only was he the only fanboy with green hair...BUT MY BROTHER MY BROTHER GOT PHOTO OP WITH BAP AND TO TOOK A PICTURE WITH ZELO AND ZELO PUT HIS ARM AROUND HIM!! MY BROTHER DIED AND SO DID I AND MY BEST FRIEND! I HAVE THE PICTURE but it is personal to him so he doesnt want to share. 

We were able to get the P1 tickets so we hi touch. The hi touch went so god damn fast i wasnt even able to 1 one world to them! Unlike last year! ( bap was my first ever hitouch i didnt know what to say so i just had my hand over my mouth ;-;  ) I wish i could say at least thank you. HIMCHAN DIDNT EVEN LOOK AT ME!! LIKE YO DUDE EYES OVER HERE.

Do you guys want to know how close i was here you go:
 

 

 

  

 

 

 

YESS HIMCHAN LOOKED AT ME AAHHHH unlike the hi touch yes im still salty

 

 

 

 

 

Is Zelo looking into my camera??? i dont know what do you guy think?

Oh and 2 more pics

 

 

 

 

Can rant with you all?? There is a reSON WHY I AM POSTING THESE 2 PICTURES OF MR MOON JONGUP YOU SEE THIS MAN RIGHT HERE IS TRYING TO DO SOME TO ME OKAY HERE IS WHY I WANT YALL TO WATCH THE FIRST 3 MINUTES OF THIS FANCAM AND SEE IF YALL NOTICE SOMETHING 

 

DO YOU GUYS SEE WHAT I MEAN!! HE IS ING PLAYING WITH ME!! HE ISNT EVEN MY BIAS (i cant have a bias my brother will kill me. but my bias used to be Yongguk and my brother married him so he is hand off. all bap memebers are. but in my words i appreciate Yongguk more) YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY HE IS PLAYING WITH ME HE DID THIS LITTLE GAME AND I WANTED TO HAND HIM A ROSE LOOKED AT IT AND TOOK SOME OTHER GIRLS IING ROSE!! YOU TING ME JONGUP WHY WHY WHY YOU LITTLE. Let me stop. 

But yes i was this close. Once again we were second row behind the barricade. My brother played nice and let people push infront of HIM! Ii tried so hard to bring him back to the front but those girls were just so rude! I am like you ing girls. Anyway this concert was also a watery one. The boys had water guns and everything and i thought b1a4 was watery. 

For this concert i had the best view because i bought these sneaker wedges and they gave me a 3-4 inch boost (im a short person 5'1 barely) Ii didnt have to look through peoples phones unlike other conerts i went to. And also i got a new phone for this concert! Which is why the pictures look so good! I love the picture quality video is okay.... but sound.... not so much as you will see with these fancams

 

And a quick cute cam of baby Zelo!

 

In all this concert was very frustrating but so much fun. From loosing my brother. (In the end we met back up for the second encore and enjoyed it together we cried a bit) We thought that since eit was april it wasnt going to be so cold.... we were so wrong. We were waiting in the cold for 12 hours...... Yes 12 hours. Its the 3rd most longest concert we waited for. But it was still amazing!

Since you maybe asking if 12 hours is the 3rd longest time we waited in line which is 1st or second? (Okay you maybe not be asking this but still) The second most longest time was BAP Live on Earth 2016. For a year that concert was the longest time we ever waited. We waited 14 hours. 

But that record was broken on April 25th 2017. For this concert i waited outside in the cold, in the pouring rain, I waited 17 hours. Me and 2 of my friends got in line at midnight the night before, Because we all got GA 

And for what concert was it my most recent concert.........

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EXORDIUM IN NY 2017!!!!!!!!!

 

YES I WAITED IN LINE FOR 17 LONG HOURS IN THE RAIN COLD AND BECAUSE OF THAT MY SWEATER TURNED BLUE (my blue hair started leaking) AND I REGRET NOTHING!!! I AM CRYING AGAIN THINKING ABOUT IT 

Yes B1A4 holds a special place in my heart but exo... EXOOOOOOOOO I AM CRYING!!!!!!!! Just a quick back story exo is has become one of my top bias groups in all of kpop and i am not ashamed to say it. 

Mr. Kim Minseok has become my ultimate bias. I love this man to death. My coworkers know that I love him so much that for my birthday last year they got me a framed picture of Minseok for me. Like I had to. And after having right there in front of me... words cant even explain it.. 

Like this exo concert is so much more different than last year. You want to know why. I am going to show you guys a picture I sitting last year

 

 

This was February of 2016 I was so high up, I couldnt even see them.

But here is where i was this year:

 

Okay I am crying so much I had to stop writing this blog a few times to contain myself..... 

I went from all the way up there to being second row behind the barricade. 

 

 

 (dont mind the guard)

I was this close to them. I went from not even seeing their facial features too seeing them perfectly 

 

 

YES DO LOOKED INTO MY CAMAREA!!!! I DONT CARE WHAT ANYBODY SAYS HE LOOKED AT ME!

 

 

 (again dont mind the the guard)

Like i dont even know what to say with this concert. I, I cant put it into words. Honestly I didnt know i was being pushed and shoved. I was just screaming my head off as you will see in my fancams. Jjust letting you all know again. My exo fancams are my worst ones. They are either blurry or shacky. I was mainly looking for my Minseok or watching the boys. my brother was incharge of the good fancams. (He had gotten seating so he was in charge of the good ones.) Oh and also screaming and awful singing

 

 

I want to be nice so here is playboy.... remember the warning from here on!

 

Before i show you guys the next fancam. I thought long and hard if i should post this one. This was only the second time i Have watched my fancams.... this one is horrible becouse you will see why. But i decided why not.... i am sorry but.... ARTIFICIAL LOVE BIG WARNING AHEAD

 

KIM MINSEOK LOOKED INTO MY SSSSS I AM TELLING EVERYONE WHY AM I NOT PREGNANT OR DEAD OR BOTH!! AND OF COURSE I WAS SCREAMING SO MUCH ITS BLURRY *CRIES* 

I am saying this man I love him so much. I dont understand why he does this to me. I am going to show you guys my most precious picture i have from the concert.

 

 

I know its a little hard to see but this is the most clear picture I have of him looking straight at me. I have so many others but this one right here he looks right at me. These feelings i cant they are to much to handle so lets move on with more fancams....

 

And those are my best videos of the exo cam i can find. Like i said my phone's audio quality isnt that great so these were the more decent ones. 

So in all this was my exo experience. I want to show one last picture 

 

 

This picture i have as my cover photo on my fb account. For me to change my something on any of my social media means it i very special to me. The only thing i regret from this concert is not paying more attention to the other members. Someone told me Chanyeol was trying to get my attention but i was kind of focused on Minseok. That i am sorry for. Sorry Yeollie... Also after the Concert me and best friend decided that we were going to say goodbye to the boys and we were waiting for their can to come out..... Well ONLY 2 MEMBERS SAID GOODBYE TO US!! THEY DIDNT REWLLY WAVE TO ANY OF THE FANS UNTILL THEY GOT TO US AND AND AND THEY WAVED TO US!!! IT WAS TOO DARK FOR TO SEE WHO IT WAS BUT THEY SAID GOODBYE TO US AND UGHHHH I AM CRYING  But this was so far my most favorite concert of all time. I lost my voice for about 2 weeks. And i had severe post concert depression. I couldnt even listen to the begining of any song before i bursted into tears. I couldnt so my feels because i usually ave a healing period after concerts. But for exo I was rushed back into normal life i have so many emotions i have been holding back. Writing this helped me express them. I know this post was long but thank you for taking your time to fangirl with me. 

These are my concert updates.... and in June or July (depending on my recovery time) I will do another concert update because i am going to kcon 2017 NY! The reason i say recovery time is because a certain group is coming.... HIGHLIGHT/BEAST if you guys dont know they are my ULTIMATE BIAS GROUP MY NUMBER 1 GROUP

They are the my first in everything fandom, first poster, album merch I ever bought. AND I KNOW I AM GOING TO DIE. This will be a dream come true. Hopefully I will be able write about. Once again thank you for reading this!