OMG guys I am going crazy. I need to vent somewhere or I'm going to explode. 

So most of you know I just had a baby. She'll be three weeks tomorrow. Since her birth, things have been very, very stressful. 

So my daughter was born with a sacral dimple. These are basically little holes in the small of a baby's back. Mostly they're harmless, but in some cases they can mean something very severe. Sometimes the dimple is open, meaning it goes all the way in to the baby's spine. My daughter's dimple was very deep, so deep that they couldn't see the bottom, so they were afraid it went all the way to her spine, which of course was very distressing for first time parents like me and my husband. So we took her to get a spinal sonogram which, thankfully, proved her dimple was benign and would close up on its own by the time she's two or three. 

So then, literally the same day we got her spinal sonogram, I noticed something a bit off about her breathing. Me, being a first time mom, of course freaked out and I insisted we take her to the emergency room. There, they stuck her about a billion times trying to draw her blood (my husband was ready to punch the incompetent nurses) and she was screaming and I was bawling and it was absolutely terrible. Well they hooked her up to a pulse oximeter to measure her oxygen levels and they were falling low. They say 95-100 is good, and hers were falling to 92-93, even as low as 88 sometimes. So they wanted to keep her for observation. Only there was no room at the hospital by our house so they transferred her to a bigger hospital a bit further away, where she was admitted to the NICU. They kept her there for FIVE DAYS just to observe her, and we could only visit for thirty minutes twice a day. It was so stressful.

So my husband also has Crohn's disease. If you or anyone you know has IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), then you know flare ups can be caused by stress. So while my baby was in the NICU, my husband had a flare up of his Crohn's disease. He started complaining about his stomach hurting one night and I urged him to go to the emergency room, because I know the signs of an impending flare up. But he wanted to just sleep it off. Well that night, I'd gotten up at like four am to pump milk (to bring to my baby in the NICU) and he passed out like I have never seen anyone pass out before. He was standing there and just fell forward onto his face on the kitchen floor, like a tree falling. It was absolutely terrifying. I was screaming and there was blood everywhere and so I called an ambulance and my husband was taken to the emergency room and then admitted to the hospital by our house. 

So both my husband AND my baby were in the hospital, but different hospitals. So I had to go back and forth, back and forth between the two, which was absolutely miserable. Thankfully my daughter was released from the hospital with a clean bill of health, and my husband a few days later. 

Well then my mother in law came to visit. She came once before while I was pregnant and it was absolutely terrible. She is the worst house guest in the entire world. She stays up all night and sleeps late in the morning (the exact opposite of me and my husband). She refuses to eat anything but Chinese food, the same three dishes over and over again for every meal. When she was here before, she would use every single dish in the kitchen to cook these elaborate meals that only she ate (since it's just my husband and me, we don't keep a lot of cooking utensils). Then she wouldn't put away her leftovers, but just leave them out on the kitchen counter, which meant that all the dishes were still being used so I couldn't cook anything for me and my husband. Additionally, she claims she's allergic to soap, so she couldn't wash any of the dishes she dirtied up. So here I was, eight months pregnant, cleaning up after a grown woman. 

So when she decided she was going to come visit us again, I told my husband no way. She could stay in a hotel, but she couldn't stay with us. Well then he guilt tripped me and I said okay, fine, she can stay with us as long as she doesn't cook anything. She has only been here a few days and I have already yelled at her about a billion times. She is so opinionated about the baby and she won't accept no for an answer. She thinks the baby, who is only three weeks old, needs to drink hot water because she's thirsty (you know, it's not like she drinks milk or anything /sarcasm/). She's convinced that we're overfeeding our baby because she nurses a lot. She thinks there's something wrong with the baby's belly (there's not). She thinks the baby is always cold (we've had that battle about a billion times). She thinks we need to feed the baby cereal (we will not). She doesn't seem to understand that this is OUR BABY, not hers! So my husband says he's going to arrange for her to go to a hotel starting tomorrow. I just can't take it anymore. I'm still recovering from childbirth, my hormones are literally insane, and I've got this old superstitious Chinese woman trying to make me drink soup to produce more milk (she has never fed a baby in her entire life, btw). UGH

Sorry for the long post and kudos to anyone who actually reads all this rubbish. I just really need to vent and, since I can't talk on the phone without being overheard by my extremely nosy mother in law, this is the best I can do.