It has been 2 years and 2 months since Luhan left Exo. I had more than enough time to move on, find another pair to ship and forget about what Hunhan had but I just couldn't do it.

The day Luhan left the group, I felt like everything is crumbling down. The first thing that entered my mind was, "What about Sehun?" I know it was crazy but you can never blame me who has been a HunHan shipper the moment I saw both of them in MAMA MV. I tried so hard to find another group to stan, another pair to ship and another bias to love but I realized no matter how hard I try, my heart always says EXO, HunHan and Luhan.

I learned to love GOT7, Suzy and JYP Nation. I shifted my attention to them because I was so heartbroken and hopeless. There was a time that I have completely forgotten about HunHan. I avoided EXO and even Luhan. Everytime I see posts or updates about EXO and Luhan, I just ignore it as if I don't know them. I even thought I already moved on from what happened not until I saw a pic of Sehun, being all grown up without his Luhan hyung by his side.

It was painful seeing Luhan and Sehun in seperate ways but I'm also happy that they're able to accomplish things by themselves. But I guess, everyone would be happier if they continue achieving success together. I love HunHan deeply because of their friendship. I adore every bit of them as a pair and individually. HunHan is my happiness in times of sorrow and my hope when I feel like everything is going the wrong way. They thought me how to love and even helped me fought depression despite being oblivious to it. They helped me overcome and live life. And, I couldn't just abandon them. I just can't.

When Christmas break started, the first thing I did was to read HunHan fanfics. I was happy again. I missed it so badly, i missed HunHan so badly that even if I was reading fluffy and comedy fics my tears would still fall. I can't even bring myself to read angsty fics because no, it will be pain once again. I just miss them so much. I stumbled once on youtube, attempted to watch HunHan's ISAC vid, my most favorite, but then 10 secs of the vid and I'm already crying. That was when I realized, no matter how hard I try to forget the pain, to forget HunHan, I could never do it because their names are already carved in my heart and forgetting the pain means forgetting their friendship.

To all Hunhan shippers, we might never see them together again but what they showed us before they parted is more than what we could ever ask for. They might be miles away, but I'm sure their friendship will always bind them no matter how far they wander.

I just wanna share what I feel. I feel like I would burst any moment if i just shut my mouth. Also, i wanna give credit to the post regarding HunHan's friendship which i hyperlinked above. Hold on. Pain ends.