Hey guys! How are you all? Alive and well?

I always wonder if anyone still reads my irregular updates or blog posts because after so much time things tend to change, people find new interests and move on. I wonder what you're all doing after all this time, whether you're still Kpop fans or fanfic readers (or like me, someone who jumps between all her interests all the time)? If you graduated already, like I did? What you're studying now? Are you happy and content?

I have forgotten about AFF for a long time, orz. Or more like, I thought of it from time to time, but felt no motivation to continue my stories here. There was too much to do in real life.

I applied for Unis (in the end I decided to major in psychology), applied for scholarships, started volunteering at a almshouse and an organisation that helps people with disabilities. But I also relaxed. I went to the Turkish sea with my mother, and (this will shock you!) to Kcon in Paris with my best friend (I have a tumblr post about it, but in China tumblr is blocked, so I can't get the link. If you're interested, I can copy it from my word doc and post it as a blog post). Then I got a temporary part-time job at a film festival in town. Suddenly, there was so much to do.

For the first time I was so actively involved in meaningful activities in society. It felt good. It was exhausting at times, yes, but I realized for the first time that I'd been far too immersed in my small own world for too long. It was time to become active in real life; really active, not just meeting friends and going to school. Since there was so much time after graduation I decided to use it to try out things, gather experience, and find out what it is I want.

And I don't regret it one bit. I wouldn't say I'm wiser now, but at least I have broadened my horizon and proved to myself and my family that I can work very hard and with difficult conditions. I also realized that creating fiction might not be what brings me the most happiness. It's comfortable and fun, yes, but I don't think I want to spend the rest of my days writing and drawing. I want to enjoy and use my youth as long as I can, to try out as much as I can, while I still can. This also made me stay away from AFF and writing, I think?

Though, once, I was very inspired to write, and I did, but it was in German and I wanted to keep it to myself. I showed it to no one because I wanted to write purely out of the joy of writing. It's a fantasy story. I haven't continued it since my sudden craze to write and plan the story for 3 days in a row. 

Anyway, I realized that only writing didn't make me happy, but not writing at all didn't make me happy either. I need fiction, need to read and write, paint and draw, but also to go out and have fun in real life, and also -- as I realized with some amusement -- to learn. My interests are wide-spread and very loose. But that's just who I am. I need a bit of everything to be content.

Since I have a little bit of time at the moment (because I am currently in China visiting my grandparents and have no set activities) I thought of AFF, thought of my stories, and was suddenly inspired to write an epilogue for mnemonic. Which I did, and it motivated me to kind of continue the story. 

So I did. And here I am, going through AFF as though it were an old diary I found in the deepest part of the attic, carefully probing as I remember who I was years ago.

Anyway, I hope you're all well and that you like the way life is going atm. 

For my part, I am very excited for life as a Uni student, though a little bit nervous about how I'll fare. Being in China at the moment is like taking a break from real life and rewinding (though also adapting to the Chinese ways, orz.) I am trying to use the time meaningfully, but the heat makes me sleepy. I am, however, studying Chinese characters and keeping my grandparents company.