aeon

aeon
noun  ae·on \ˈē-ən, ˈē-ˌän\
an immeasurably or indefinitely long period of time
 
I titled this blog 'aeon' because I've been gone for an immeasurably long time (but not really because even though I've been silent I was still using AFF). I've personally had have a ton of things happen in my life this past year. I wish they were all good things, but truth is there were more bad things than good. I had--still sorta have--this period of self-doubt that really came close to self-hate. Life was so tiring that it left me drained and uninspired. (so I drowned myself in angsty music and angsty fanfiction and the occasional fluff that the stories I'm subscribed to brings) But I'm back (more or less) Life is still rocky and drama, and I'm still listening to sad songs and reading angsty fics (in my defense, angsty fics are awesome and make your heart go kyuuun), but I'm also listening to a lot of happy songs now and I'm piecing myself back~ It was a period of growth too, understanding that not everything lasts in life, that you can't keep holding on to things that doesn't want to be held on to, that sometimes, you have to let go and move on. Being happy isn't about having so many good things happening in your life; it's about finding happiness even in the worst of times~ I lost a best friend (she's not dead; don't worry) that I loved so much over something we promised we'd never fight over. I really wish things could've ended differently, but I have high hopes for a brighter tomorrow (like being able to talk normally with her again), and as bangtan sings:
Because the dawn right before the sun rises is the darkest
Even in the far future, never forget the you of right now
Wherever you are right now, you’re just taking a break
Don’t give up, you know
 
so yeah, life's been crap, but hey, there's always a brighter tomorrow. And just like in the movie Tomorrowland:
There are two wolves who are always fighting
One is darkness and despair
The other one is light and hope
The question is: Which wolf wins?
      The one you feed.
 
 
I will be feeding my happy wolf and will be ending this blog awkwardly now...
bye~
- Kasey :)

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BoraKim #1
I know that feeling too. I am not very friendly with my best friend now because of certain things. I wish you don't take this too hard. I will be rooting for you. Fighting~