What up's up friends?

I remember once upon a time I only felt happy and excited when BIGBANG or Super Junior released new songs or looked handsome, but then EXO came and suddenly a wild animal inside of me stirred because of Sehun.

Now it's back, and it's not holding back. NCT U and just freaking sm rookies are killing me. I don't even know how to handle myself. I'm embarrassed. ;A; I'm going to be 20 this year. (21 in Korea ;A; (I'm old)) And I can't blame my teenage hormones anymore. What to do?

Luckily, I feel very thankful to NCT because man... life is a ing mess right now and if I faced it straight on I'm not sure if I could handle it. So having NCT to feed to my happiness and inspiration is so great. I really wish I could personally thank them or something. I'm losing weight rather than gaining (gaining weight is a serious problem when I'm sad- I just eat my sorrows away) even though I wouldn't be surprised if depression got me for real this time, but nope. I couldn't be more determined to for once be proud of myself and fight harder. And now I've written a fic in a weeks time and I'm writing an alternative ending and I just really wish I could do that with all my fics.
 - Still writing when not inspired is god damn hard. I still feel very sorry for the people who are still waiting for an ending for (so many of my stories) I haven't given up yet, but I'm quite busy lately.

I haven't been blogging much or anything, but I don't know where to get this off my chest, so I decided it's time to rant here. I know there's a lot of people who can relate here, and thank you guys for being here with me. <3

To all NCT fans who have found my blog and who I am very excited to meet and talk to in the future. Do feel open to rant with me. <3 

I'm going back to editing the alternative version to Frost and plan out the updates. 

(Btw Mark likes to write and he likes to write science-fiction. HELLO FRIEND! PLS DON'T READ MY FUTURE SCIENCE-FICTION NCT FANFICS BECAUSE I'M TRASH) And wauw... just realized it could be so funny if Mark wrote a fanfic.... Well maybe he will write a k-drama in the future? That would be awesome.)

I'm gonna leave before I begin ranting about Ten, Taeyong and Jaehyun.Because then my heart would burst and I don't think I would ever stop. 

Being a fangirl is hard.

Let's talk in the comments! See you soon! <3