Rest in Peace
A FarewellRest In Peace
Dear Jonghyun,
how are you today? On Monday morning I was quite happy. My phone played your song Happy Birthday - my birhtday is in few days so I planned to listen to it again and again that day. But when I got home after work and started my laptop, the first notification hit me so hard, it told me that you are dead.
When I heard the news, I couldn't cry. I couldn't believe my eyes and I hoped that it is some mistake, lie. But it was true. There is big bleeding hole in my heart, it really hurts. I am somewhat still in denial, but today when my music player started to play SHINee song and I heard your voice, I finally started to cry. This isn't nightmare, right? This is sad reality.
SHINee is first K-Pop group I fell in love with - and you are my bias. I alwas though that we are similar and if we met in real life, we could propably be friends. Your music is my strenhgt and my inspiration.
I read your last letter. It broke me again. Behind your smile there was pain. You felt lonely, but no one noticed it. I know how depression is. I know it too well. But I still hope there is light somewhere - I can't see it now, but I cling to this hope. You couldn't see the light in the darkness of your depression, I understand it. So you decided to let go of all the pain. I hope you are at better place and that you are okay, now.
I wish I could write you more, but my english isn't so good and I am fishing for words and sentences. I wish I could write something better.
You did well, Jonghyun-ah. You've worked hard. Thank you for the memories. I love you. I miss you. I won't forget you. Rest in peace. ¨
So goodbye.
Markéta (Shawol from Czech Republic)
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