(( Hello all~ Sorry for there not being any a/n's recently, things have been really busy uou
But I do have a question! The chapter after this one has a backstory to it, but the back story doesn't involve the main 12 members, so I was wondering if anyone had a preference between these options:

-Doing a double update
-Just incorprotating the backstory into the chapter for an extra long chapter
-Putting the backstory into a separate story thing(If this happens, then it'll be at least 4 months before it goes up)

We wanna take your opinions into consideration before deciding what we do ^^ ))

 

“Do you and Jongdae plan on moving into one of the apartments together?” Yixing asked, watching Junmyeon spoon some sugar into his tea before he set the spoon on the table, shaking his head.

“I have no knowledge of that being a plan, even if it would make sense. We often switch between which apartment we stay at, which sounds silly when you think about the fact that they’re next to each other. However, I think that if I were to suggest it, he would simply say that we should move into a house together if we’re going to move in together,” Junmyeon explained.

“The two of you make me feel a little jealous.” The comment caught the blond off guard and he looked up to see Yixing staring down at the mug in his hands.

“Aren’t you enjoying living here with Yifan-Hyung?” Yixing laughed at the question, looking up at the other from under his eyelashes, watching Junmyeon raise his coffee mug to his lips and take a sip of the tea it held.

“Of course. I would say it’s like a dream come true, but…” he trailed off, looking back at the cup in his own hands, thumb rubbing over the drip that was left on its rim from his last sip.

“You’re still having your nightmares?” Yixing nodded, eyes remaining downcast as if he needed to be ashamed of it. “Is Yifan-Hyung gone at night? I thought he was running a firm here,” Junmyeon continued, Yixing’s eyes closing as he sighed softly.

“No, he’s not gone at night… It’s just, for some reason if he gets up in the middle of the night I’ll wake up from some nightmare where he was saying that he changed his mind… or ones of when he said he was staying in China…” Yixing explained softly. “They feel so real… Usually when you have a dream of any kind, when you wake up you forget most details from it. But not with these… I remember everything he said to me, sometimes the words ring in my head hours after I’ve woken up… When I’m dreaming I get a sick feeling in my stomach like everything that’s happening might actually be real. And when I do wake up and see that Yifan-Ge is still there, I feel such a rush of relief that it almost makes my head spin… I know Ge tries to make me feel better when they happen, but… it makes me sad knowing that he lies there blaming himself.”

“It is his fault,” Junmyeon mumbled under his breath, and when Yixing gave him a sad look the other lowered his attention to the table.

“I thought you had forgiven him.”

“I-I have, it’s… I’m sorry, it slipped out.”

“That doesn’t sound convincing,” Yixing countered, pulling a sigh from Junmyeon.

“I’m… trying to forgive him. It took me so long to trust him to take care of you and to love you before he actually did anything wrong, so it’s going to probably take me even longer to place my trust in him a second time. I know he cares deeply for you, but I don’t think that the damage that he caused is just something that he can love away. You used to sob in your sleep, and then deny that he wasn’t coming back, and it tore me apart to see you like that because there was nothing that I could do to help you… What he did put you through a harsh trauma, so he’s not wrong in blaming himself since he’s the one who decided to keep you in the dark about what happened. Especially after you let him-” Junmyeon cut himself off, biting at the inside of his lower lip as he fought another slip.

“Junmyeon, we all know that it was my choice to have with Yifan-Ge. It’s not like he agreed after he knew he would have to stay in China. He didn’t find out until the morning after. And I had been trying to get him to be intimate with me like that for a while, despite how I may or may not feel,” Yixing added in when the other opened his mouth. A silence settled between them, Junmyeon seeming to notice the way Yixing’s shoulders had bunched up before the other had.

“I… I’m sorry. I’m hitting a nerve that I shouldn’t, aren’t I?” He asked, leaning back in his seat before turning his focus to his mug. “I’m just going to take a lot longer to forgive him than you did. I’m just…”

“I know you’re just being protective of me. You have been ever since we bonded.”

“... Something you mentioned earlier… What about Jongdae and I moving in together makes you jealous? You and Yifan-Hyung moved in together first, so I don’t think I understand,” he said, Yixing looking up before his shoulders sagged and the look that flickered through his eyes made Junmyeon’s heart sting a little.

“Because… This doesn’t feel permanent. I love living with Ge, but… It feels like a dream. A house is something really big. There’s a lot of commitment that goes into looking for and buying one, and once you buy one it’s hard to get rid of it. This is just an apartment with a lease that isn’t meant to last forever. Anyone can get an apartment together, but only a couple who are in it for the long run would think to buy a house,” Yixing said, folding his arms on the table and leaning to lay his head on them.

“Has he done anything that would make you suspect he was planning on leaving?” Junmyeon asked, Yixing shaking his head before burying his face in his arms.

“No, nothing. I’m just… scared. I know there’s no reason for it but, just, nothing feels permanent. Not living here, not being with Ge, none of it. And I don’t like feeling like this because I know that he can tell something’s wrong. I see it in his eyes when-” The sound of the front door closing caused the blond to stop, and he sat up before leaning back to try and peak out of the kitchen in the direction of the door. “Yifan-Ge?” He called, frowning when there was no response, attention shifting back to Junmyeon. “You heard a door too, right?” he asked, the other offering a shrug.

“Perhaps one of your neighbors slammed their door on accident so it sounded like it was yours?” he offered, Yixing looking in the direction of the door once more before he settled back in his seat and turned his attention to Junmyeon once again.

“I hope that me bringing this up doesn’t make you think poorly of Yifan-Ge… more than you already do, that is,” Yixing added, Junmyeon biting his lower lip. When he released it and opened his mouth to speak, he nearly jumped out of his skin when there was a loud mew, and he turned his startled expression to Meng just before he jumped up onto Yixing’s lap causing the blond to giggle before scratching under his chin. “I think he’s saying it’s time for a nap,” Yixing said, a small smile crossing Junmyeon’s lips as he stood. He made his way to the other side of the table, reaching out to brush Yixing bangs out of his face, hand slowly lowering as his smile did.

“I want to trust him. I hope you know that,” he said, Yixing looking up at him and staring for a long moment before offering a single nod, turning his focus back to Mung, picking him up as he stood to walk Junmyeon to the front door.

“Yixing.” The voice was as soft as the fingers carding through his hair, pulling him slowly from his sleep. He blinked a couple of times, turning his head a little to see Yifan kneeling beside the couch that he was laying on, feeling Meng shift a little as he tried to sit up without much luck, pulling a soft chuckle from the older. “I expected Junmyeon to still be here, since the two of you don’t see each other very often anymore,” he said, watching Yixing roll onto his back, Meng finally moving from where he had been curled up on the blond’s hip.

“Meng wanted to take a nap,” Yixing reasoned, eyes closing again and Yifan thought for a moment that he had fallen back asleep until Yixing tried to sit up again, Yifan placing a hand on his shoulder to stop him. Yixing opened his eyes, looking up at Yifan who simply smiled before leaning down to kiss his forehead, biting back a laugh when the other let out a small whine, stretching up for a proper kiss. A smile crossed the younger’s lips and he laid his head on the other’s shoulder the best he could, looking down when he felt one of Yifan’s arms slip under his waist, the other hooking under his knees before he was lifted from the couch and carried to their room. Yixing noticed the fraction of a wince that flickered over the other’s face when he wrapped his arms around his neck, wondering if it was sore from doing paperwork, padding his fingers into the muscle at the base of his skull, earning a curious look from Yifan.

“Long day at work?” Yixing asked as he was laid on the bed, Yifan joining him a short moment later. “I thought I heard you come home when Junmyeon was still here; I guess I’m still getting used to the new noises here. The doors seem like they’re weighted so they close louder than the ones at the complex Junmyeon and I lived at.” Yixing rattled on, talking about his afternoon with Junmyeon; where they had gone for lunch before returning to the apartment to talk for a while longer. He was cut off midsentence with a big yawn, Yifan chuckling before Yixing leaned his head over onto his shoulder.

“We should head to bed,” Yixing said, a smile crossing Yifan’s lips.

“Alright, but first I wanna show you something.”

Yixing’s eyebrows knit together a little as he wasn’t able to follow the other’s thought process, but he sat up and moved off of the other's arm that he had been laying on, watching Yifan struggle with ing his shirt as he was trying to undo them quickly. When he finally got the last one undone his eyes flickered to Yixing’s face before his focus moved down to his own chest and he slid the fabric off of his shoulder. The yellow stuck out almost more than the black lines, Yixing’s eyes tracing over the skin on the left side of Yifan’s chest, a little slow to process the image that the colors made up. Yixing felt his lips part, mouth hanging open in awe as he reached out, caught a little off guard when his hand was stopped by Yifan placing his palm against Yixing’s, intertwining their fingers.

“Careful, it’s still fresh,” he warned, lowering their hands to rest on his thigh as Yixing’s attention turned back to the image on Yifan’s chest. A fluffy sheep, asleep on a cloud with a crescent moon hanging in the background with characters reading ‘my little star’ were written underneath.

“I… You got a tattoo,” Yixing breathed, Yifan letting out a soft laugh. “When? It wasn’t there this morning when you left…” he stated, only able to tear his eyes away from the design for half a second to meet the older’s gaze.

“After I came home earlier.” Yixing’s eyebrows knit together, this time able to keep his eyes on Yifan’s.

“Why did…” Yixing trailed off as Yifan looked down at their hands.

“I overheard you talking with Junmyeon… About how things don’t feel permanent, and how apartments have leases that aren’t meant to be forever. But tattoos,” he paused, eyes shifting to the new addition to his skin; it still hurt, which was probably obvious from the red tint of the surrounding skin as well as the fact that it was a little swollen. The next few nights were going to be a little on the unpleasant side, since Yixing always slept with his head over Yifan’s heart, or holding onto the fabric over it, if not completely laying on top of the older. “They’re permanent.” Yifan raised his gaze to Yixing’s, watching his face closely, tongue coming out to swipe over his lips. “We’re permanent.” The words made the younger’s eyes glint, tears threatening to spill over his eyelids. His head tilted forward, meeting Yifan’s forehead with his own for only a moment before he pulled back to wipe at his eyes. Yifan opened his mouth, a pained noise escaping when Yixing flopped onto him with enough force to send Yifan backwards onto the mattress, wrapping his arms around the older’s neck, landing completely over the other’s tattoo.

“Ow! Hun, that hurts,” he whined, Yixing pulling back and murmuring a soft ‘sorry’ as he looked down at the reddened skin.

The pair settled down for bed not long later, after Yixing had insisted on putting some of the lotion Yifan had been given for his tattoo to make up for landing on it. His hands were gentle, much to Yifan’s relief since he was cautious of touching it himself with how sensitive his skin was. Yifan watched Yixing pull off his own shirt after he had settled on the bed, curiosity flickering in his eyes. The only time they had both been missing their shirts when sleeping together was their last night at the beach house when they had fallen asleep after having .

“Skin feel nice,” Yixing explained softly, Yifan’s heart fluttering at the pink tint across the blond’s cheeks before he laid down and snuggled close against Yifan. When it became obvious that he didn’t know where to put his hand Yifan smiled, intertwining their fingers and resting their hands beside his head, ignoring the thought that his arm would most likely be stiff in the morning.

Waking up the next morning to find that he was right was quickly forgotten when he realized it was the first night Yixing had slept through completely.

Here's a link to the picture Angel drew of Yifan's tattoo~

http://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj271/Runami_Nara/20161028_104558_zpswejam9n9.jpg