“OUR STORY [Jaejoong] - Part 1”

How long it will take for your heart to heal after a painful break up? I’ve been wondering about this for a long time. It’s probably a week, a month, a year or more than that. But one thing for sure; there will be one day when you wake up and realize that you feel nothing anymore. The pain is gone and you’re ready to move on.

In my case; it’s really hard for me to fall in love and it’s really hard for me to move on. I’ve been very careful in choosing my partner. ‘Extremely careful’ just like my little brother described me as. I’m too scared to be hurt. Just like any other people; I wish that my relationship would last forever. You just need to find the right one and marry that person. But if only it’s as easy as it sound.

The reality is too cruel because you have to step on the rough path and stumbles upon a bumpy road first; then learn how to overcome the pain before you can walk swiftly. I’m an optimistic type of person and always look at every misfortune positively.

My life was planned perfectly. I finished school with an excellent result and was enrolled in ‘H’ University; major in Law. I dated a handsome charming basketball player named Shim Changmin and just like we’re destined together; he too got enrolled in the same University but with a different course. His major was in Engineering.

He really fit my taste – tall; build body; basketball player; a slight tan skin; wearing spectacle stylishly [not in nerd kind of way]; doesn’t need to share the same interest as I do but respect what I like; and most importantly…he’s not in the same course like me because I don’t find someone who knows what I knew is attractive.

Our relationship started very great and I felt like I was the happiest person in this world. But when I thought we’re doing fine and when I thought he was the one; he suddenly called off our relationship. One break up won’t bring me down. I was hurting and depress; I can’t deny it. But I won’t allow it to drag me down to a darkness pit. It will take me sometimes to move on but I’ll find a way to deal with it somehow.

There’s something else that happened not long after that which changed my life forever. That’s when I learnt the most valuable thing in my life – something that you want isn’t necessarily what you really need. And every story doesn’t always end with a happy ending.

I’m Kim Jaejoong and here is my story.

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“SHIM CHANGMIN!!!”

“SHIM CHANGMIN!!!”

“SHIM CHANGMIN!!!”

All the girls were cheering for one particular name; the hottest player in the basketball court at that time.

“Oh oh! Shim Changmin’s trying to shoot…can he do it?”

“Can he do it?”

“HE SCORES!!!”

“YEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH~~~~~~~~~~!!!!” They screamed. Everyone jumped in joy; celebrating it.

“Yes…he did it…” I muttered softly. I stood up and clapped. Eventhough we’re from the different faculty and he’s playing for the University Tournament…I still came to cheer for him.

I really love watching people playing basketball and I’m easily attracted to the basketball player because of their heights and the figure of their bodies.

“Changmin-ah…congratulation…” I congratulated him in a low voice and from the bench even if he didn’t hear it. And even if he didn’t see me.

If it’s before; I couldn’t come here because you don’t allow me to. You’re afraid that my presence would influence you; you’re afraid that you’d do bad and end up upsetting me – that’s what you told me. You don’t want me to see you in your bad condition in case your team lost; you added. But now that we’re no longer in a relationship; I can do this…right?

I’m glad that I was able to see you and your team won the game. And I was right; you look awesome and stunningly cool. You have lots of fans too. I smiled to no one and got down from the bench.

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“Dude~! We almost lose the game if not because of you. You came back at the last freaking minute! Thank God!” TOP threw his arms on Changmin’s shoulder and ruffled his hairs.

Changmin threw a glance on the bench as he’s looking for someone. He spotted that person in the middle of the game and he was so assured that he was there. But now he’s gone. His eyes trailed off at the exit door and finally found him.

He’s leaving.

“Jaejoong” Changmin mouthed the name. He threw the towel on TOP’s face to go run after him.

“Yah~!” TOP shouted but Changmin won’t listen to him.

When he got out from the court; Jaejoong was far ahead leaving him behind. He wasn’t even realized that Changmin was running after him. He slowed down and stopped running. Its 30 minutes before 12 midnight and the road from the court to Jaejoong’s hostel was barely lit. But underneath the moonlight and with the help of the streetlight; Changmin could watch him from where he’s standing.

Jaejoong’s astonishingly beautiful.

A light tap landed on his shoulder. TOP finally caught up to him.

“He was the one that inspire you at the last minute; right?” TOP guessed. When Changmin didn’t answer him; he knew that he was right.

“If you still love him; then why don’t you go after him? Why did you stop?”

 “I can’t…even if I really want to hold onto him; I can’t…This situation reminds me of how we’re totally in different level…I could never catch up to him and I’ll always be left behind…”

“…just look at him…the only reason that we could stay together before is because he doesn’t realized what he actually have…if he snap his finger and everyone would line up in front of him…he’s too humble; he doesn’t realized that he’s the fallen angel…and an angel is still an angel even if he stands on the ground…he stood out…”

“Really? Because to me; he looks so lonely…You care too much about what other people thinks that you didn’t consider his feelings… anyone who let him go is a dumb and chingu; you’re the dumbest of all…” TOP gave him a friendly pat while shaking his head.

Changmin stumped.

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“Look how they arranged these juices…the apple juice will always be next to orange juice…”

“I like apple juice and you like orange juice…”

“Yes…it’s just like seeing us standing next to each other...inseparable…”

Jaejoong smiled briefly when his mind flew to one of their moments together. And he guessed that memory will remain as another memory after all. He grabbed the apple juice and closed the fridge’s door.

“Apple juice again, Jaejoongie?” The ahjumma said to him as he’s placing it on top of the counter.

“What can I say…it took my heart away…” Jaejoong clasped both of his hands on his chest; acted dramatically. The smile never leaves Jaejoong’s face as he replied. The ahjumma chuckled.

He got out of the shop after he paid for the drink. The class will start in 10 minutes and he needs to be there right in time. Junsu’s already waiting for him in front of the class. He walked in a rush heading towards the class and failed to notice one particular person coming from the other direction. He had his eyes fixed on Jaejoong the whole time as he walked past him.

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Jaejoong tapped the pen against the book as he’s waiting for the lecturer. He’s still sipping onto his juice when Junsu turned at him like he’s about to ask something.

“Where were you last night? You said you weren’t coming to watch the soccer tournament…but when I got back to our room; you’re just arrived too…” He arched his brow feeling suspicious.

Jaejoong bit onto his straw and avoided an eye contact afraid that he might be caught. But it’s too late as Junsu’s already figured it out.

“You went to support the basketball team…Changmin’s team…” He hit right on the spot.

“He’s in Engineering faculty and we’re in Law faculty…please don’t get it mix up…”

“…and we won by the way…” Junsu pretended to sulk.

“Aww come on Junsu-ah…I’m not much of a soccer fan; you know that too…and besides; I know we would win…because you’re there giving them your full support…” He pinched Junsu’s chubby cheek lightly as he’s flattering him.

“Well I guess I could accept that…but when I join the soccer team; you have to be there to support me…” Junsu stated the condition causing Jaejoong to pout.

“Really? Do I have to?” Jaejoong made an ugly face; expressing his dislike and he was hoping that Junsu would let him slide.

“No excuse!” Junsu gave a clear warning while shaking his index finger. Jaejoong huffed.

“I guess I better bring the pillow along with me then…”

“Yaahhh~!”

“Or should I pray that you won’t get accepted into the team instead?” Jaejoong made a thinking pose; obviously teasing the latter.

“Yaaahhh~~~!!!” Junsu whined even louder. He slapped Jaejoong on his arm playfully. Jaejoong just chuckled.

Just then Junsu stopped laughing and his face slowly turned serious. He nudged Jaejoong lightly at his rib while gesturing with his mouth; asking Jaejoong to look outside of the class.

“The stars of the week…” Junsu said and Jaejoong looked over to see who Junsu’s referring to.

“Park Yoochun?” Jaejoong blinked his eyes and looked back at Junsu; asking for a confirmation.

“You know him?” Junsu answered Jaejoong with another question.

“He’s my best friend…we grew up together…I’ve told you about him before; remember?” Jaejoong placed the straw close to his lips and drank slowly; not really interested with Yoochun.

“He’s the one? You never told me the part of him being the soccer athlete!”

“Really?”

Junsu nodded eagerly.

“Well…maybe because I’m not interested in soccer at the first place?” Jaejoong smiled cheekily that later earned Junsu’s cute pout.

Jaejoong’s gaze averted from the sulking Junsu to the one who’s talking to Yoochun. He stole Jaejoong’s attention at the first glimpse.

“Junsu-ah…who is he? The one who’s talking to Yoochunnie…” Jaejoong’s heart skipped a bit when he saw him smiling.

“He’s…stunning…and handsome…”

Junsu disbelieved with what he just heard coming from Jaejoong’s mouth.

“He’s Jung Yunho; from the same school as us…he’s in the soccer team too but you hate him; remember? He’s always came in between with you and Siwon…”

Jaejoong’s face feigned disgust when he heard Siwon’s name mentioned.

“Urghh…it’s in the past…still can’t believe that I liked him…Now that I think again; I’m glad that he chose Heechul over me…both of them really suit each other; party lover…”

“The latest one I heard; they broke up already…” Junsu added. And Jaejoong wasn’t even surprised with that news.

“But seriously? That’s Jung Yunho? He’s like a total different person now…with that hairstyle and appearance…”

Junsu nodded to everything that Jaejoong’s listing down as he’s putting the candy into his mouth.

“He knows how to dress up now…he really live up to his status as our faculty’s idol…” Junsu stated. The warm smile spread across Jaejoong’s face as he couldn’t even take his eyes off Yunho. He flinched when Yunho suddenly turned around and caught him staring at him. And luckily Yoochun was there too that he could make an excuse.

Yoochun spotted him and rushed into the class.

“Please forgive me for the late announcement…the class is postponed…the lecturer is on sabbatical leave…”

Jaejoong’s jaw hanged low. He’s cursing Yoochun in his heart. How could he? They’re waiting for the lecturer to come like an idiot while he’s just enjoying his free time talking outside. It seems like other students were thinking almost the same thing like he did. Everyone stood up as the class dispersed.

“I’m sorry…I forgot…I just remember about it when I see you just now…” Yoochun came to his table to apologize. He smiled foolishly while scratching his un-itchy head.

“You wanna me punch you that bad?” Jaejoong said through his gritted teeth. Gathering the books in his arms; Jaejoong pushed the chair backward and stood up.

“I’m sorry…” Yoochun made a cute face.

Jaejoong ignored him and was about to leave when Junsu pulled the hem of his shirt. He’s sending a sign to Jaejoong; asking Jaejoong to introduce him to Yoochun.

“Ahh…Yoochun-ah…this is my friend; Kim Junsu…and Junsu; this is Park Yoochun…”

Yoochun waved at Junsu showing his bright smile. He then threw his arm on Jaejoong’s shoulder.

“I’ll treat you two for lunch; how about that?”

“Declined!” Jaejoong waved his hand in dismissal.

“Ouch…! You just hurt my heart…” Yoochun held his chest and pretended like it’s really hurt. Jaejoong just shook his head.

“I’ve already made a promise with someone else…and besides…your friend’s waiting…” Jaejoong’s talking about Yunho who’s standing at the door frame. He’s been watching the whole scene.

“Are you still dating that jock?!” Yoochun raised his voice as he threw that question. Jaejoong’s steps died right at where Yunho’s standing. He waited for the same pain to prick his heart but to his surprise; he didn’t feel anything anymore. A soft chuckle emitted from his lips; started to feel funny.

“See you tomorrow; Yoochun-ah…” Jaejoong waved at Yoochun without bother to look at him and stepped out of the class. Junsu’s tailing him from the back.

As soon as he walked past Yunho; Jaejoong realized the new feeling nudging his heart. His heart started to lose control just at the thought of Yunho and when his mind recalled back the warmness of his smile; his heart began to hammer against his chest.

“Because of him?” He asked himself and mentally shook his head soon afterwards thinking that it’s ridiculous.

He awarded some points to Yunho for being so attractive and he smells really good too! But still; he’s out of Jaejoong’s preference. He’s tall but not as tall as Changmin and he’s playing soccer instead of basketball. Jaejoong hates soccer!

But he had to admit that Yunho would be a good candidate to distract him from thinking about Changmin. Jaejoong’s not good in dealing with the aftermath and ever since the day they broke up; Jaejoong’s been searching for the rebound. He kept himself busy by going out with different kind of people for meaningless dates over and over again. It sounded more like a self-destruction than self-distraction.

Jaejoong couldn’t care less. That’s the only thing that could make him stop from running back to Changmin.

But unknown to Jaejoong; Yunho’s presence in his life is not just a mere distraction. He’s yet to realize that everything is about to change.

*****************************************

Jaejoong closed the door behind his back by using his foot. He placed the shoes on the rack and put on the slipper. But the sound of the door closed; alerted another human being in that room. So he came out to check on it.

“OMO~!!!” Jaejoong jumped in surprise when their eyes met.  

The room assigned to every student isn’t as small as people might think it would be. It’s more like a house with two rooms; a small living room; a kitchen and a bathroom. But ever since the registration day for that semester; another room is left empty so Jaejoong thought maybe he’ll be the only one who’s staying in that room. And that’s why; he was shocked to find another living person in that room.

His eyes were on the verge of popping out when he saw who’s that person is.

“H-heechul-ah!”

“Ah…it’s you Jaejoongie…” He managed to say through his slanted eye. Wincing at the bright sunlight sneaking through the window; he quickly pulled the curtain to block it.

“I never knew that we’re assigned in the same room…” Jaejoong said casually. Sensing the level of awkwardness gradually developed in between them; he headed straight to his room. He’s an easy going and friendly type of person so it wouldn’t be a problem for him to get close with a stranger. But Heechul isn’t a mere stranger. Both of them used to like the same person regardless whether or not Heechul knew about it.

It’s all in the past but it’s still weird for them to live under the same roof. He wondered if it’s a good idea.

“You see; I had problem with the previous roommate… so I made a request to change room…” Heechul followed him from behind.

Jaejoong mouthed an ‘O’. That was enough information for him; Jaejoong thought. He doesn’t have to ask for the actual reason. Heechul is known for being a party lover and a hot temper. Jaejoong just replied it with a smile and put down his bag on the table. He opened up his closet looking an outfit for a change.

“I’m supposed to move in 2 days ago but with the University Tournament…and our soccer team won; so I just slept with Yunho…”

Jaejoong’s ears twitched when Heechul mentioned Yunho’s name.

“So…you’re with Yunho now?”

“What?”

“Ahh aniya~!!!” Heechul shook his hands.

“Not that kind of slept…I slept in Yunho’s room…our team won and we celebrated…but I drank too much and asked Yunho to pick me up…” Heechul immediately rephrased his sentence along with a detail explanation.

Jaejoong chuckled.

Heechul brought his finger to massage his temple and Jaejoong finally got it. He was hangover.

“I’ll make you a coffee…” Jaejoong pulled his chair out and steered Heechul to sit down.

“That will help…thanks…” Heechul let his gaze wandered around scanning Jaejoong’s room right after Jaejoong disappeared into the kitchen. Jaejoong’s really good in designing his room. It’s very comfy and cozy. It feels like home and everything is neatly arranged – very clean.

Jaejoong came back from the kitchen with a cup of coffee. It was placed on the table right in front of Heechul. And right at that moment; Jaejoong’s phone rang.

“You’re at the front gate already? Give me 5 minutes…” He said before ended the phone call. Heechul couldn’t help but eavesdropping the conversation.

“You’re going out?”

Jaejoong nodded and pulled out his favorite shirt and jeans. Holding onto the cup; Heechul rose up intended to go back to his room.

“I’m going out for lunch…do you wanna anything?”

“Mmmm….sushi?” Heechul requested in a low voice. He hesitated afraid that it might bother Jaejoong.

“Sushi it is~!” Jaejoong responded with a cheerful tone. Carrying the wallet and the phone in his hand; Jaejoong jogged towards the front door. Heechul on the other hand went back to his room only to remember that he doesn’t have Jaejoong’s contact number.

“J-Jaejoong-ah...your phone number?” Heechul shouted but Jaejoong’s already gone.

Jaejoong found that he’s comfortable living with Heechul. In fact it wasn’t that hard for them to get along with each other. Perhaps it’s because of Jaejoong’s nature that is easy to tolerate with others? And Heechul wasn’t always at their room. He’s out most of the time and only got back at 2 or 3 in the morning.

Both of them were in the same faculty even though they’re not in the same class. At least they have one thing in common; something that they can discuss and talk about when they’re alone together.

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Jaejoong pressed the elevator button and waited in front of the steel door. He’s finished with the class for that day and he just wanted to go back to his room and sleep. For the past 2 weeks; he spent most of his time in the library for the group discussion and finishing the assignment.  Now that everything’s done; he finally able to take a break and breathe properly. His body ached and he was in dire need of rest.

He lifted his head and stared at the black screen with a blank face as he’s counting inside his head seeing the moving number. The steel door opened and there’s not a single person in it. Jaejoong leisurely stepped in while yawning; pressed the close button and then leaned against the cold wall. He’s currently at the 4th floor and the elevator has to go through 3 more floors before it could reach the ground floor. He thought he could fall asleep while waiting for it.

The elevator stopped when it reached the 3^rd floor and the door slid open; revealed Yoochun and Yunho’s faces.

“Oh Jaejoong-ah…” Jaejoong straightened his body and flashed his smile at them. And the same thing happened again when he laid his eyes on Yunho. He froze and his heart’s pounding hard causing him to suffocate.

Yoochun stepped in and went to stand right next to him. Yunho on the other hand took a spot at the corner of the elevator; closed to the exit and directly facing him. He stood there in silent and once in a while stealing glance at them.

“Are you okay? You look pale…” Yoochun said placing his palm on Jaejoong’s forehead; concerned.

“I’m fine…just tired…that’s all…”

“Want me to send you? You’re staying in the same room with Rella right?” Yoochun kindly offered.

“You have an appointment with Prof Kang…” Yunho suddenly interrupted.

“Ah that’s right…I almost forgot…” Yoochun smacked his forehead.

“That’s fine Yoochun-ah…I can walk…it’s not that far…”

“You think I would allow it? You’re alone…”

“I’m not a little kid…and not even a girl…” Jaejoong protested but it’s useless when Yoochun didn’t even pay attention to it.

“Yunho will send you…” Yoochun had decided fully discarded Jaejoong’s opinion in it. Jaejoong fluttered just by hearing Yunho’s name; he lost his words.

“You can; right Yunho-ah?”  

Yunho didn’t spare a minute as he nodded. Jaejoong looked at him feeling disbelief.

*****************************************

“Thanks…but you don’t have to do this…” Jaejoong told Yunho while pulling on the seat belt.

“It’s useless to argue with Yoochun about it…he’s stubborn…” Turning on the car’s engine; Yunho calmly answered.

Jaejoong’s heart sank upon hearing Yunho’s answer. That was the first time Yunho spoke to him and it sounded like he’s being forced by Yoochun. His statement killed Jaejoong’s excitement right on that spot. At first Jaejoong thought; being alone with Yunho would help him getting to know that man better. And now his mood ruined and he’s getting sleepy.

“Now you’re making me feel bad for putting you into this…”

“It’s okay…I have nothing else to do anyway…”

Jaejoong dumbfounded. Can’t he tell what ‘upset’ is?  THAT’S IT! He would give up on Jung Yunho right at that moment. Jaejoong folded his arms to his chest and threw his gaze outside of the window. Now he wondered if the rumors about him are true.

‘He probably spread it himself…nice my …’

‘…and those girls must be really stupid and out of their minds; running after this man…’

Jaejoong came to a conclusion. And as he continued expressing his dissatisfaction about Yunho in his head; he drifted to sleep.

Yunho slowed down the car as they reached at the front gate of Jaejoong’s hostel. He changed the gear into the parking mode and pulled the hand break.

“Jaejoong-shi…we’re here…” He said and turned to look at Jaejoong. That’s when he realized that Jaejoong’s fallen asleep. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel; didn’t know what to do.

“J-Jaejoong-shi…” He shook Jaejoong’s shoulder gently; waking him up. But he got no response from the latter. Yunho scratched his head as he’s thinking. And after a long moment sitting there in silent; he drove the car away as he decided to make another round.

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