Nightmare Review
by LadyComma
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Story Title: Nightmare
Author: 1995dark
Genre(s): Angst
Brief Description: Lee Sungjong, the maknae of Infinite, is having nightmare every time he closes his eyes. He can’t sleep and he is afraid. He loses his appetite. Of course his hyungs sees that something isnt right with their maknae but they can’t figure out how to help the maknae. Which one of his hyungs will take away his nightmares and will finally release maknae from that horrible feeling and give him a new one. One who is called Love.
Rated H: Yes
Reviewed By: angelfocusbroken (Lady Comma)
1. Title: [5/5 pts.]
Short, sweet, and too the point title. Those are the kind of titles I like, they are eye-catching without giving away too much. Great job picking out the title!
2. Poster/Graphics/Background: [3/5 pts.]
Even though you don’t have a poster per se, I am grading this section based on the other graphics which would be the background. I found the background to be distracting because It was piled on top of one another and it drove me insane. Sorry for being rough, but I hate backgrounds that are piled on top of one another.
3. Foreword/Description: [6/10 pts.]
Well, your foreword and description had a lot of grammar and spelling issues. Even though this is just a very short story, almost like a one-shot, you should always make sure your readers first impression is good and not negative due to all of the errors. Next time, be sure to re-read and check over your writing prior to posting it.
4. Plot: [20/30 pts]
The plot was cute but I felt like it needed some elaboration. I wasn’t overly thrilled with the lack of description as well as how fast the story went. I do realize it was intended to be somewhat like a one-shot but I was hoping it would be a bit longer as well as thought out. Next time, be sure to think out the plot prior to writing your story and make sure you know what you want to say, or what you want to happen, before writing.
5. Flow: [3/5 pts.]
The flow was a bit bumpy as well as fast paced. Next time, slow the pace down and give the reader time to digest what they are reading.
6. Characterization: [5/5 pts.]
I found nothing wrong with how the characters were portrayed. Good job in this category.
7. Grammar/Spelling: [5/20 pts.]
There were a lot of spelling errors as well as grammar mistakes. I was very disappointed at how poorly written it was. Whenever you’re writing a chapter, or your one-shot, be sure to go back and re-read what you have written and correct your mistakes. I know I’m being harsh in this category but seeing that this is a one-shot, I was hoping for it to be written a bit better.
8. Overall Enjoyment/Entertainment: [10/20 pts.]
I did enjoy your one-shot, it was sweet despite it being so fast paced. I was glad to know that the main character survived his ordeal in the end and was able to return to the group.
Comments/Feedback: I know you’re working really hard at writing and learning English and I commend you for that. I know how hard it is to learn another language. Keep up the good work, don’t stop writing, and I hope I’ve helped with this harsh review!
Total: [57/100]
*Please always remember that if you make changes, or add to your story, you can always request for another review to better your score. Just send in another application, and we’ll get back with you as soon as possible.*
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Comments
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hi_there_kpop on says:
I've requested ^^
hellhathfury on says:
Hi, I'm curious, do you not review oneshots? Since in the rules it says to have at least 3 chapters.
l_kim96 on says about chapter 1:
I requested a review :D can't wait xD
carlafaaaaye on says:
Hi, I submitted a form weeks ago but I still don't see my story on the pending list?
LonesomeAngel on says:
I would just like to ask if you do review incomplete/still progressing stories? And do you review yaoi stories as well? (just to ask since some shops don't review such genre).
AznDuckies on says:
hello i have just requested a review lol. first time ever.
--iSoul on says:
um i was just wondering. i requested from quite a while back (lol no worries im not rushing you) but i see my story is listed to be reviewed by "BlankText". but when i came to her profile, it states that she's deactivated. does this mean my story isnt getting reviewed anytime soon?... ;__ ;
ljolson on says:
I requested a review~ Can't wait [:
Nicsnsd on says:
I submitted my request but don't see it in the list....
threecheers on says:
Sent my request. Thank you in advanced! :D
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