For 2909: My Unintended Choice

PROMPT 03: Secret Santa Fic Exchange

For: theperfnerd
By: anon
Rating: pg13
Word count: 2.578
Warning(s): n/a
Summary: sehun has always been (and always will be) in love with baekhyun, baekhyun who's only ever needed sehun whenever he is chanyeol-less. Author’s Note: i’m.. so sorry idk what this is LMAO pls don’t hit me--

 

 

“you could be the one who
listens to my deepest inquisitions
you could be the one
i’ll always love”

 

sehun always thought baekhyun looked most beautiful like this: rosy cheeks and pink nose, hair adorned by tiny snowflakes fallen from the sky in search of rest atop an angel’s head.  cold fingers that baekhyun blows hot air at in an attempt of warming himself up, just before sehun takes the shorter’s hands in his own and baekhyun smiles. sehun smiles back.

yes, baekhyun was most beautiful in winter, buried in layers and layers of the softest clothing that honestly reminded sehun of a human doll, one not of porcelain but of cotton instead that sehun could wrap his arms around during long peaceful nights.

and baekhyun shined  in uttermost beauty when he would end up by sehun’s door, face still flushed pink, hair still adorned with tiny white snow, beige scarf dangling behind his back. but in every painting and masterpiece rests a ruining detail and baekhyun is no exception to it. sehun could be a writer, maybe a poet and romanticize one’s pain; he could be like those soulless artists who claim a person is most beautiful when they cry. as much as sehun could compare baekhyun’s watery eyes to crystal, he fails to find anything beautiful in the visible proof of their hurt.

which is why when he opens the door and faces baekhyun, he waits. he knows the process. he is familiar with the scene.

the scene in which baekhyun’s gaze meets his own, lips pursed, brows furrowed, and tears start rolling down his little bambi eyes as he whimpers, ‘i really hate those guys’.

it’s in less than five seconds that sehun pulls him into his comforting embrace and the safety of his house.

 

 

 

 

baekhyun is beautiful in the way his delicate, feminine fingers curl in the fabric of sehun’s sweater, tugging at it for closeness and reminding the taller of a kitten kneading a blanket before claiming it as its sleeping spot for the following hours. baekhyun did not claim sehun’s lap as his sleeping spot but rather as his comforting spot, arms around the blonde, head against his chest, knees raised, feet resting on the sofa right next to sehun’s thigh. a complete human ball is he, childish and vulnerable yet fitting so greatly in the embrace of the younger.

but sehun’s feelings aren’t as a gentle as a kneading kitten. to sehun, it feels more like baekhyun is digging his hands through his chest, counting his ribs and wrapping his pretty fingers around his heart, squeezing, squeezing painfully and sehun willingly bleeds because all he wants is to taint baekhyun red. but his blood colour is of an invisible shade for the shorter, because sehun could lie at his feet, drained and dying and baekhyun would fail to notice the pool of crimson red achingly bled for him and him only.

“he left,” baekhyun’s words are silent and soft and it takes sehun a moment to realise the shorter spoke, almost unwillingly so dragged out of his thoughts bubble. “he left to meet with jongin and yixing.”

sehun remained silent, fingers brushing the shorter’s dark hair, easily slipping in between his own wet locks for the snow had melted.

“i don’t understand.” baekhyun’s voice was shaky and tiny and it only pulled stronger at sehun’s heartstrings. the smaller’s hands clung tighter onto the taller and sehun’s heart beat faster. “we were supposed to spend the night together. i had everything ready. yet he told me he rarely gets to be with them and he couldn’t let the chance slip.”

(sehun thought of the countless times baekhyun left him hanging for chanyeol and he didn’t feel the bitter taste in his tongue one would expect to feel. sehun could never feel bitter with baekhyun in his arms.

he held him closer.)

“you’d never do that, right?” baekhyun’s shiny eyes are now looking right up at him and sehun was sure this gaze would bring him to his knees if only they were standing. “you’d never cancel your plans with me for someone else, right?”

sehun wants to laugh.

(he doesn’t laugh.)

instead he feels his skin burning as his lips stretch into a smile. it hurts and he feels as if the smile is cutting through his flesh but he does it anyway. he smiles for baekhyun. “i would never.”

maybe sehun wants to cry instead.

 

 

 

 

 

baekhyun fell asleep in sehun’s lap, and sehun remained unmoving for two hours and forty seven minutes listening to his soft breathing and soft sighing that were all too melodic for his ears. sometimes sehun wonders if baekhyun is an angel, a child of god who lost his wings, precious as diamonds and pure as gold. his beauty is breathtaking, a truly angelic vessel is his body and his voice reminds sehun of melted chocolate and everything good.

but sehun soon realises that baekhyun being an angel would be a silly thought, for behind that fair façade, sehun has learnt baekhyun has more similarities with the devil himself.

and yet sehun is still willing to burn in hell with him, and for him.

metaphors of angels and demons are unfitting and rather overused, if sehun may say, and so he prefers to come up with medieval settings instead. baekhyun is, in all sense of the word, a prince. for a prince does not have to be kind, a prince does not have to own a warm heart beneath their graceful self and yet he shall still be superior for that status blessed upon his head, the decision of whether is heart is painted gold or black falling unimportant. to sehun, baekhyun would be the most beautiful prince to ever walk on earth, with grace beyond word and an astounding smile – a fake portrait.

(baekhyun would be a prince that waves at the poor and caresses an orphan’s cheek just to order their beheading once the palace doors close behind them.)

but royalty is royalty and their place is not curled up in a commoner’s lap, sehun decides, for he himself is unworthy of a prince’s touch. he knows it, for baekhyun has made it rather clear once or twice in the past, under subtle poison and fake sweetness.
with a sigh sehun finds himself carrying a sleeping baekhyun to his own bed, it being no throne dignified of a prince but the best sehun had to offer.

as for himself, being sentenced to a night on the couch sounded deserving of someone not good enough to share the same covers as a blue-blooded boy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

baekhyun reminds sehun of blossoming flowers in winter when he’s skipping through the trails of the local park, all big smiles and twinkling eyes and ‘hurry sehun, hurry!’. sehun willingly lets himself be dragged by the other, dumb smile pinned to his lips for he is so, so stupidly in love.

baekhyun blabbers about movies, books and fantasies and each syllable uttered from his pink pair of lips sound beautiful to sehun, whose ears are gladly drunken in the melodic timbre of his voice.
they intertwine fingers as they watch the family of ducks on the lake and sehun finds it most adorable how baekhyun’s lips stretch into the most excited smile as he sees the mother duck followed by her little ducklings in line. but it’s cold, and soon sehun finds himself seated in the safety of a coffeeshop, sharing sips of hot drinks and warm smiles.

afterwards baekhyun insisted on going to lotte world and sehun couldn’t find it in him to say no even if he wanted to.

ten minutes in there and he wished he had refused.

“i don’t want to talk to you.” baekhyun huffed, furrowed brows and puffed out cheeks as both his arms wrapped against sehun’s own, back turning against chanyeol who so conveniently happened to be there. “leave me alone.”

“baby, c’mon.” chanyeol plead back and sehun almost wanted to throw up, caught in between a tangled mess of fake hurt. because he knew baekhyun well, he knew baekhyun more than he knew himself and he could easily tell apart when the boy truly is upset and when he’s acting tough for the hell of it.

baekhyun was putting on the whiny show on purpose and sehun felt stupid for falling for his charms once again.

(but who is he kidding, baekhyun could easily give him a poisoned apple and sehun would take a bite just because baekhyun smiled at him.)

“no.” baekhyun’s protests went unheard just like the shorter intended to, for soon enough he was being ripped off sehun’s arms and pulled into chanyeol’s instead – an act sehun is ridiculously used to yet burns like it’s the first time all over again.

he wonders if he could possibly count by his fingers the amount of times he’s found himself in this precise same situation before and he comes to a quick conclusion that no, he can’t, as he eyes the couple in front of him. what sehun can count however, are the exact steps of the following scene.

one, baekhyun fights back and whines purposely loud for sehun to help him.

(yet doesn’t look at him.)

second, he is unable to hold back a smile and gives himself away; chanyeol pulls him into his embrace and baekhyun blushes.

(neither of them looks at him.)

third, chanyeol leans close and they exchange sweet nothings and empty words. they kiss. they forget sehun is still there.

(he feels himself falling.)

fourth and final step, they leave. chanyeol’s fingers intertwine with baekhyun’s the way sehun’s were before and he pulls the shorter away into the crowd. neither looks back.

suddenly, the laughter of children all around seems to cease in sehun’s head.

 

(he has fallen. he is a fool.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the silence is black and sehun is partially if not entirely at fault for it, for he had been the one to invite baekhyun back into his home three days after being abandoned like a dog in the middle of lotte world. baekhyun plays innocent but sehun is no stupid and the hint of awkwardness and perhaps something akin to remorse (although this is most likely sehun’s imagination and inner wish) is noticeable in the raven-haired male’s gaze as he avoids eye contact.

but after long hours on the phone with kyungsoo, after miserable weeping and shaky ‘i can’t do it’s, sehun has been convinced that he deserves to at least confront baekhyun with the way he is mistreated – to let the other know how he makes sehun feels.

and sehun is scared, terrified for the reaction, for the answers and for the holes baekhyun will most likely imprint in his already rotten ribcage, leaving sehun feeling like a corpse, a mere graveyard holder of nothing but meaningless memories.

“just tell me.” baekhyun breaks the long silence and sehun wishes the cold voice didn’t cut as sharply as it did.

sehun’s heart is beating fast against his chest. his hands are shaking and so he presses them in between his bony knees. his gaze is low.

“what you did,” sehun starts and his voice cracks in anxiety but he can’t bring himself to care for he is too terrified of everything else. “it hurt.”

baekhyun remains silent and sehun takes it as a sign to continue.

“we were- we were together, you know..? you and me.. we were hanging out together. it was about us.” sehun stuttered and stumbled over his own sentences, train of thought wrecked as he tried to think of the best way to voice his feelings without misunderstandings. “but then chanyeol appeared and.. suddenly it wasn’t about us anymore.”

“it was never about us, sehun.” baekhyun replies, purposely focusing on the least important part of sehun’s words. “there’s no such thing as us. us exists between me and chanyeol.”

“that’s not- i didn’t mean that.” sehun sighs and his voice feels so tiny he wonders if baekhyun can even still hear him anymore. he doesn’t want to do this – he doesn’t want to continue talking. he wants to do things baekhyun’s way once more and put himself up to be broken like a porcelain doll if only it means he will have the boy’s attention.

but he knows he will regret it if he doesn’t continue, so he does.

“i meant that we were hanging out together and the moment chanyeol showed up, you left me.” he said, and finally did he gather courage to raise his head and look baekhyun in the eye. “the two of you left me behind just like that.. you didn’t say anything. you didn’t even look back at me.”

a short silence sets once more and when baekhyun stands up, sehun closes his eyes and accepts the fact that he has most likely blown everything. he awaits the sound of baekhyun walking away but the steps sound closer, and when his eyes open again, baekhyun is crouching down in front of him.

“sehun, baby. i’m sorry.” baekhyun’s words are soft and dripping with poison and sehun knows his smile is supposed to be apologetic yet it doesn’t feel like it at all. “i like you a lot, but.. chanyeol will always be above you, you see? he will always be my number one, not you. i’m sorry, but it’s the truth.”

 

sehun only realised he was crying when baekhyun walked out the door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

sehun always thought baekhyun looked most beautiful like this: rosy cheeks and pink nose, hair adorned by tiny snowflakes fallen from the sky in search of rest atop an angel’s head.  cold fingers that baekhyun blows hot air at in an attempt of warming himself up, just before sehun takes the shorter’s hands in his own and baekhyun smiles. sehun smiles back.

yes, baekhyun was most beautiful in winter, buried in layers and layers of the softest clothing that honestly reminded sehun of a human doll, one not of porcelain but of cotton instead that sehun could wrap his arms around during long peaceful nights.

and baekhyun shined  in uttermost beauty when he would end up by sehun’s door, face still flushed pink, hair still adorned with tiny white snow, beige scarf dangling behind his back. but in every painting and masterpiece rests a ruining detail and baekhyun is no exception to it. sehun could be a writer, maybe a poet and romanticize one’s pain; he could be like those soulless artists who claim a person is most beautiful when they cry. as much as sehun could compare baekhyun’s watery eyes to crystal, he fails to find anything beautiful in the visible proof of their hurt.

which is why when he opens the door and faces baekhyun, he waits. he knows the process. he is familiar with the scene.

the scene in which baekhyun’s gaze meets his own, lips pursed, brows furrowed, and tears start rolling down his little bambi eyes as he whimpers, ‘i really hate those guys’.

it’s in less than five seconds that sehun pulls him into his comforting embrace and the safety of his house.

 

(he ignored the stinging pain of cruel repetition and he accepts the knowing fact it will come back and bite him once again.

for sehun is willing to go through massive pain if only it grants him a grain of baekhyun’s affection.)

 

“you could be my unintended choice
to live my live my life extended
you should be the one
i’ll always
love

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
OdetteSwan
910 streak #1
Chapter 5: I have read this before.
But, I'm glad that I read it again.
This is so nicely written. I'm happy that Baekhyun was able to worm his way to Sehun's heart.
Thank you so much for sharing.
oppadeuI #2
Chapter 4: woah story no. 3 hurts like i mean baekhyun is using sehun and the both of them knows that ??? HOLY GO AWAY DEVIL SEHUN DOESN'T NEED THIS KIND OF TREATMENT im crying can u tell
R_nine21 #3
Chapter 6: LMAO r u ok Baekhyun-ah?
R_nine21 #4
Chapter 3: I love u Jongdae hahahahaahahaha
annyeong_bunny #5
Chapter 3: I NEED A SEQUEL TO THE 3RD STORY LIKE ASAP
kyseobie
#6
Chapter 8: I... I'm not sure what to say to this one.. it's so overly ual it makes me uncomfortable
Nimzaj
#7
Chapter 11: Omfg, actually this is pretty sweet ;; I needed something like this after reading a lot of angst SeBaek xd thank you for sharing!! So cute the way they just fallen in love with each other <3
teddles #8
Chapter 4: I do not like you right now Byun Baekhyun. :(
ohsehuwn
#9
Chapter 2: Love ittttt❤️