Random Rambles: Please forgive any grammar/spelling mistakes guys, it's 3.28 am here xD Thank you <3

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If there was one word that could sum up my life, it would be ‘confusing’. Maybe mediocre. Average, perhaps. Maybe all of the above…Or maybe, as I’ve recently found out, none of the above. I had never found life to be all that grand, I was still waiting around to be absolutely wowed into a stupor- I guess that changed as well. 

Call me boring, if you want. Unexceptional, even… At this point, I wasn’t even sure whether I was still allowed to call myself by my name. Jae-In Miyano, was my name, the daughter to a beautiful, wonderful, hobbit-sized Korean mother and an amazing Hawaiian-Japanese father. - At least, I thought that’s where I was from…

My eyes were wet when I opened them, expecting to see darkness. Imagine my surprise when instead, I found myself lying in the middle of a very familiar meadow. The grass was soft beneath me, its color a luscious green. A gentle breeze swept through the land, playing with my hair that still hadn’t changed back to its natural brown color. The sun was setting in the clear horizon, or maybe it was rising? I wasn’t sure. The sky was ablaze with beautiful colors of yellow and orange, pink streaks changing into purple, farther away from the sun. The sky above me was still wavering in twilight, tiny stars still sparkling, a faint imprint of the moon lingering in the last bits of darkness. 

I knew this place, but how did I get here? 

Looking around, I slowly got up, the grass tickling my bare feet. It was so quiet here, so peaceful, but kind of abandoned. Was I alone here? When I took a step forward I cringed, the beating of my heart loud and powerful, as if it had been healed, reborn. 

I looked down at my chest, expecting to see some kind of wound there, but there was nothing there, save for a faint light pulsating in time of my heartbeat. Did this mean that it worked? The world around me looked so tranquil and green it must mean that it worked, right? 

I couldn’t really be happy about this though, since I wasn’t even sure what had happened, nor did I know where I was. 

Jae!

I turned around at the whisper, expecting to see someone standing behind me, but there was no one there. “Kris?” I called out, but seeing nothing. 

Noona!

“Sehun? I’m here!” I called out loudly, searching for any sign of them. I ran across the field, expecting to see them, though I don’t know why I would think that. It was pretty clear what I had done. I sighed softly, fully aware of the fact that the dagger had disappeared. 

Where am I? The meadow I was in was beautiful, don’t get me wrong, but I didn’t like how lonely I felt here. Someone must be around, right? They couldn’t have just disappeared! I started to run, hoping to find someone. I figured I’d just run towards the sun, but no matter how fast I went, it didn’t seem like I was really going anywhere. 

Jade…

“Dad!” I called out turning around, startled, but elated at seeing my parents in the distance. They walked towards me, clinging to each other. I jumped up and down and waved at them. “Mom! Dad! I’m here! See? Everything is okay! Are we on the island? Is everyone alright? Where’s everyone else? Are the boys with you?” I shouted excitedly, but they didn’t seem to hear me. “HEY!” I shouted louder, but no reaction. 

A rock settled in the pit of my stomach as I watched them walk closer towards me, but not acknowledging me at all. Now that I saw them better, I noticed that they were wearing strange clothes, clothes that didn’t quite belong in this world- provided that this was the earth I thought it was…

Mom and Dad looked younger here, speaking to each other quietly but enthusiastically. And then, I remembered. 

I woke up. The dagger I had plunged into my heart unlocked my memories and they were floating in, one after the other. I was looking at a memory right now, and the tears were already in my eyes. 

“I think Jade is a lovely name!” Dad told Mom who had a pensive look in her eyes. 

“What if we are granted a son? Jade sounds more feminine in my opinion,” she argued, rubbing her flat stomach. 

“Of course not! We could call him Jay!” he replied cheerfully, running towards me a bit, and I waved, but I knew that he couldn’t see me. He carefully reached out towards me, his hand resting in the middle of thin air, but I could feel his touch. His warm, gentle touch. 

I remember. I hadn’t been around long. I’ve learned about the good and the evil in the world I was put in charge of, and I was still trying my best to learn more and do well, just like Yongsun told me to do. I was young, but I did my tasks well, or as well as I could. There was a couple, I recalled, that always paid me a visit at the end of the day. They came from a village very far away from me, but that never stopped them to come over. They came every day and I always looked forward to see them. 

It was odd seeing this memory now, knowing who I really was back in Exo planet, and who I had become on earth…

“Hello,” Dad said to me without actually looking at me. “We’re back, and we’ve brought some water and tiny gifts. We know you like flowers- honey?” he called Mom over, who placed a beautiful basket of flowers near my feet. I felt tears welling in my eyes and smiled at them, seeing how they looked at me with so much hope, so much cheer. I touched Dad’s hand and his eyes widened. 

“Oh, the Great One is awake,” he whispered to Mom. “I told you that there’s always someone listening,” he winked. 

“I know you must tire of seeing us every day, and I know others visit you that are more worthy of your time,” he started, Mom grasping his hand when she saw that he was becoming emotional. “But we’re resilient folk,” he chuckled. Mom rested her hand in the air as well and I placed my hand against hers too. The touch brought a smile on her face. 

“We’ve been trying for many years now, Great One,” she whispered. “But we still have yet to experience the blessing and honor of becoming parents,” she said, her voice so soft and gentle it sounded like she was praying. 

“You are the Guardian of Guardians. You provide to us protection, life, prosperity and peace. We should not ask for more,” Dad continued, his hand moving up and down in caressing movements. “But if you could, if it is in your power… We would very much like to ask that you grant us a child to call our own. Whether the child is a boy or a girl won’t matter to us. We will cherish and love it with all our hearts and raise it to become a good person. One that is worthy to live in your world. One that will do whatever is in its power to keep you safe, to cherish the gifts you’ve given to all the world,” he promised solemnly. 

“Please, Great One,” Mom added gently. “Will you grant us one child?”  

A soft sob escaped my lips as I looked at their hopeful faces, unable to truly touch them even though they were so near. I never did manage to grant their wish on Exo planet. The Black Imoogi came and destroyed the world. But I remembered this couple. I remember all the people that lived in my world. 

That night, when the Black Imoogi attacked me, attacked my world, I knew that I didn’t have much time left. The Guardians were fighting all throughout the land to ensure the safety of others, trying to defend me. I was young. I wasn’t as strong as I was now. I didn’t have another choice. 

The only way for me to stop the Black Imoogi from gaining his most desired power, was to sacrifice the world Yongsun so painstakingly created and cared for. The world that I loved as well. The Black Imoogi had thought that the chaos and destruction that rained down on Exo planet was his doing, that he was the one responsible for such havoc because he dared attack me. 

But, that wasn’t true. I had gathered all the energy the world could spent so that I had a chance to save what was left of Exo planet. Exo-L were given a second chance in a new world, one that I had thought was far away enough, safe from the Black Imoogi, the same way I did for the boys. I didn’t know where they would end up. I didn’t know if they would remember or not, but I had never taken into consideration that I would forget who I was as well. 

When I was certain that I had evacuated everyone I could, I knew that it was my turn. The Black Imoogi wanted the yeouiju that Yongsun had always possessed and had kept as a trophy, the shape of a dagger. My strength was waning that night, but I still managed to extract my heart and put it in the yeouiju for safekeeping. As long as another Tree could be made, the world would be safe. It was the first time I had turned into a human- an achievement I hadn’t had the pleasure to experience. I had wanted to surprise the boys with the transformation one day, but I never got that chance. 

Back then, I woke up to fire and destruction, to a sky that wouldn’t stop bleeding. All I knew was to send the dagger to wherever it was the guardians were going to, and that’s when I started to forget. 

The black snake had called me a peasant girl, and I believed him. A peasant girl who cried when she saw twelve stars fall. A peasant girl who wished that she had loving parents to call her own. A peasant girl who died…only to wake up in a bed one day with no recollection of her past. 

The island of Ookami Shinro was created on the day that Exo planet died. Earth never had an island like that before, hence its obscurity to the rest of the world. 

I sighed softly as the memory of my two parents standing before me faded and I was left alone again. If I could remember everything again, would it mean that the people of the island, the Exo-Ls, would they remember too, now? And what of the boys and the black snake? I had sent the shadows to go after him, but it didn’t have to mean that he was defeated. What if the boys still needed help to get rid of him?

I couldn’t just leave them all like this, could I? Tree of Life or not, I would never make the same mistake Yongsun did. I didn’t want to abandon anybody, nor did I feel like carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders by myself. I was strongest with my guardians by my side, we were stronger by standing by one another. This couldn’t be the end. Just like that? No way, right?

Jae, is this it? You’re going to leave me out in the cold like this? 

I gasped at hearing the voice as I looked around again. Was that another memory as well? “Xiumin?” I called out. “Are you here? Where are you?” I asked, my voice dying away with the wind. However, before my eyes I saw a glimpse of a younger Xiumin, speaking to a butterfly, speaking to me. 

The wind blew and the image was gone, but I still ran after it. “No, wait! Don’t leave me, please!” 

I can’t read her…I can’t hear anything! Jae, where are you?!

“Lulu,” I muttered, not startled this time when I saw a young boy having an animated conversation with the same butterfly that flitted about Xiumin a few seconds ago. He started to laugh, nodding his head excitedly before that memory faded away too. Was this a sign of some sorts? Did something try to tell me that this wasn’t over yet?

Thinking about something so upsetting, brought a new image before me. I saw the fake forest before me now, black flames engulfing most parts of the chamber. I saw the Black Imoogi writhing in agony at the attacks of the shadows I had sent him. I knew then that this truly wasn’t over yet. I had reconnected with my heart, but I wasn’t growing. The Tree wasn’t growing yet. 

I could feel the vibrations of the energy of the entire earth dancing in the air, but I wasn’t connected to them yet. Why wasn’t anything happening?

Jae, if you think for one second that I’m flying in after you, you have another thing coming! 

My heart clenched at hearing the boys’ voices, but I couldn’t respond. They didn’t hear me… Sure enough the image of the black snake disappeared and that of a lanky young man sitting on a bench reading a book appeared before me. He had a deep scowl on his face and kept being distracted by that butterfly that flitted around him. He whacked his hand around in hopes that the insect would fly away, but, of course I wouldn’t do that. A feeling of melancholy settled in my heart when I found out that Kris was in the habit of stating that everything was not his style from a very early age. 

Jae, please, hold on! W-we’re coming to get you! 

Suho. I saw him standing before me in a nervous state, hands trembling, feet shuffling. “I don’t know if I can do this,” he said ever so softly. “Shouldn’t Xiumin-hyung be the leader? He is the eldest, after all…?” I smile to myself upon seeing the look of confusion and surprise on his face after he hears that I chose him for a reason, and that I had faith in him. I still have faith in him. I actually believe that he might come for me. 

Why did you injure yourself like that, Jae-yah? You have to come back so that I can heal you… 

Lay’s hands had always been the most comforting, the most soothing. I watched a younger version of himself as he was gently carrying a butterfly around, speaking to it on occasion. I remember the conversations we had. His heart was filled with dreams and hopes of peace and harmony, his spirit full with determination and willingness to work hard to achieve his goals… I shouldn’t have left…

Images of past memories with each of the boys flashed before me like I was watching a real life movie. A young Baekhyun was practicing his skills, trying to catch me with his light and laughing. You need light in the darkness, noona. Please, don’t disappear like that… 

YAH! NOONA! Chen’s voice rang louder than the thunder he could produce. Scream if you hear us! WHERE ARE YOU?! A young boy with the devious smile of a cat on his face appeared before me, chortling in excitement as he chased a butterfly around, zapping tiny bolts of lightning at me. “What do you mean, this isn’t helping? If you were human-sized then maybe you won’t have to be scared!” he laughed and stopped when I flitted towards him. “Ah, okay, okay! No need to shout! Maybe you’ll show us your human-form tomorrow!” he said innocently. “Say, are you a boy, or a girl?” he then asked, yelping in surprise and pain when I summoned my own lightning to buzz his . “Wah! Okay, a girl! Sheesh, you could’ve just said! You sound just as young as me, how was I supposed to know you’re a girl?” he whined. 

The memory faded again when another voice rang through the air around me.

Noona! You can’t leave when I just learned how to fly! Please! Chanyeol had always been cheerful. Even when he learned that he could control what most considered the most dangerous power known to man, he took the news with a smile on his face. He wasn’t easily afraid of anything and learned quickly how to adapt to being a guardian, always watching that butterfly fly around him while I could hear the wish in his heart- make me fly like a phoenix too, please. 

Jae! Say something! The world around me rumbled and vibrated as though the very earth I stood on had moved. A small child with chubby cheeks, wide eyes and plump lips was staring at me. He looked up with a tiny hand resting against the bark of the Tree. I could feel his gentle touch, though the expression on his face looked like he was angry. 

“I don’t know why you chose me,” he said, his voice no more but a whisper. “But I promise I’ll take good care of you, if you promise to take good care of me. Deal?” he asked in a tiny voice, finally breaking out a smile when when one of my tresses wrapped around his pinky. 

“You made an excellent choice for choosing me as your guardian!” Tao’s high-pitched voice sounded as baby D.O. made way for a tiny Tao, swinging his staff around in great confidence. “I’m not scared of anything, so I’ll be able to protect you!” 

I laughed upon seeing him jump up in fright when a frog had hopped to the scene, and he desperately tried to recover. “I-I wasn’t scared!” he yelled loudly. “I was surprised, t-that’s all!” I still covered him with my leaves when he leaned closer towards the bark.

Noona! Don’t scare us like this! Please, say something- come back! When I blinked, I felt tears streaming down my face and I looked around, wondering if there was a slight chance of me getting out of here and back to my pack. How do I go back, Tao, tell me…

I don’t know where to find her! I can’t see a damn thing down there! Yah, noona! Why do you always have to cause so much trouble?! Hearing Kai’s frantic voice nearly broke my heart all over again. 

“I’m h-here,” I said, but I knew that no one would be able to hear me. 

Jae-noona…don’t leave us… Sehun’s voice was fragile, so childlike. The tears were still in my eyes when I saw Sehun in front of me, like I’ve known him. The tall, sensitive Sehun, reaching out to cup my face and lean his forehead against mine. “Come back,” he whispered, a warm, gentle breeze enveloping around us. “Please, we still need you. This isn’t over yet- t-this isn’t the answer!” 

This wasn’t a memory. Sehun was truly trying to speak to me. “I’m sorry,” I told him. “This was what had to happen-,” I didn’t even know how to properly explain. All I knew was that since my memories finally came back to me, I could only assume that theirs had returned as well. They must’ve remembered who I am now. But if they remembered, then that must mean that-

“Did you think I would let you escape and ruin my one chance to gain the ultimate power?!” The Black Imoogi yelled, the world around me crumbling a bit. He was still alive… The shadows weren’t enough! 

The image of him crawling out of the darkness in the fake forest appeared before me now, and I knew I was watching this through a window somehow. I was situated in the place where I had taken my own life, but I was separated from the world there. The boys tried to hold Mr. Yok back, but it wasn’t enough. Not yet. I’ve had my fill of this guy. As the Tree of Life I was more than aware of the responsibilities I had as a Guardian of the world, one of those responsibilities being that I had to maintain the natural balance. Darkness would always be needed to balance the light- but Mr. Yok went too far. No world needed this much darkness. He had always tried to destroy the light, tried time and time again. But enough was enough. This had to end. 

The boys thought that I had left them. That’s why they were searching for me, that’s why they felt so distraught. That’s why they couldn’t stop the Black Imoogi by themselves. I had to show them that that wasn’t the case, but how? 

I took a deep breath and thought only of them, ignoring what the Black Imoogi was telling me. The sky had started to darken as he spoke, but it was important for me to focus. 

“I will kill all you love, like I had done before. I will murder your so-called parents first, so that you may see the anguish and suffering in their eyes before I squeeze the life out of them!” he shouted, while I tried to block out his evil voice. Xiumin, Luhan, Kris, Suho, Lay, Baekhyun, I summed up in my head, seeing their faces, seeing their smiles. 

“There will be no escape this time! I will pulverize you, dispose of you as I did my foolish brother!” Mr. Yok hissed as I steadied my footing when he tried to break through to get to where I was. 

Chen, Chanyeol, D.O., Tao, Kai, Sehun, I chanted inside of my head. I let all the memories, old and new, flow in my mind. All the good memories, and all of the bad, the ones I had forgotten, and the ones I had just made. I held on to those most precious to me. Those memories that were strongest. 

D.O., smiling at me for the first time. 

Suho appearing like a grandfather at my doorstep and being nervous about meeting my parents. 

Chen’s laugh through the thunderstorm we were in. 

Lay holding me in his arms that night I healed him for the first time. 

Chanyeol’s warmth offering me protection and comfort. 

Luhan’s crooked smile when he asked me permission to enter my mind. 

Xiumin asking me to speak informally with him, telling me that he’d like for us to become friends. 

Kai playing with the rottweiler at the edge of the forest. 

Tao’s excitement upon realizing that he wasn’t alone when he used his amazing power. 

Kris carrying me and flying off through the still night sky. I didn’t tell him that I was singing ‘A Whole New World’ in my head. 

Sehun sulking jealously at his hyungs, though his eyes conveyed how much he cared for them regardless. 

Baekhyun teasing me for the first time to show how comfortable he was around me.

Baekhyun Jr.- wait. 

“Aish, noona! Of all the memories we made together- THAT is the one that sticks?!” 

I opened my eyes at hearing his voice. “Baekhyun? Where are you?” I call out, steadying myself as I feel Mr. Yok’s darkness try to seep through into my world, but I wouldn’t allow him. 

“We’re with you, Jae,” came Suho’s gentle voice. “But we need you to be here with us, as well.” 

“But I am with you,” I tried to clarify. “I’m not gone.” 

“We know that, Jae,” D.O. answered quietly. “But we still need to finish this together, as we were meant to do all those years ago,” he explained. 

“Grow, Jae-yah. We’ll help you,” said Lay soothingly. 

I nodded at this, feeling the darkness wavering when it tried to penetrate into my world. I oddly felt myself grow taller, even though I knew that I would never actually grow another inch. But the best part was that I didn’t feel abandoned and alone anymore. I didn’t feel like I didn’t belong. I was where I was supposed to be. I was home, with my pack. I felt their energies move through me, giving me strength, hope. Their hearts and feelings made The Tree of Life grow once more, as I felt the Black Imoogi diminishing in strength, though he would never admit to that. 

When I opened my eyes, I was standing in the fake forest again, hovering over the crevice. I felt my roots drill deeper into the ground and spread to all corners of the world. I felt my branches reach higher and higher into the sky as the roof of E.T. Corp crumbled away. I felt the light of the moon against me, and it brought me energy instead of it away from me. The blood moon was nearly drained and then we would’ve made it. I just had to get rid of the world’s darkest evils. No big deal, right?

“No!” Mr. Yok screamed at seeing a new tree having erected from the ground. “You think you’ve won?!” he yelled. “You think this means anything?! I CAN STILL KILL YOU!” he practically shrieked, his energy increasing significantly- but the upside to that, was that the boys were amped up on power all over again. I would personally make sure of that. 

Together on this, boys, I told them. 

Yeah! We are One! Suho shouted in excitement. 

Hyung- could you not? Kai asked in embarrassment. 

Let’s do this- for noona, Sehun looked up at me with a smile. 

For everyone, I nodded, watching the Black Imoogi as he grew bigger in size as well, summoning his despicable shadows, armies of them against thirteen of us. 

I don’t suppose there’s room for two more? A soft, deep voice asked cautiously. 

I looked at Mr. Tabi as he supported Mr. Kang. I had half a mind to tell him to choke on it, but seeing the genuine regret in his eyes only filled my heart with warmth. 

Jae- no! He betrayed us, he’ll do it again! D.O. immediately protested. 

I can look inside of his mind and heart, D.O., I told him. Anyone who regrets the mistakes he’s made and is asking for forgiveness, may receive it. Mr. Tabi lowered his head at this as they prepared for the final stage of the fight. The shadows attacked, but the boys were relentless. Kris and Chanyeol were given the temporary ability to transform into the two mythical creatures they pride themselves in resembling. A dragon and a phoenix, taking care of large portions of shadows as the earth shook and trembled at the amount of energy clashing against each other. 

Mr. Kang fashioned an army of metallic men himself, which Chen amplified in power and strength with his lightning. To my surprise. Mr. Tabi was working with Lay and D.O., using their combined strength to get rid of the shadows and soon, all that remained was the Black Imoogi. 

“You cannot win!” he screamed, jumping towards me as his poisonous fangs bit through the bark. I yelped at the sting of it, but Lay helped me heal. 

If you’re talking about yourself, I’m not surprised, I responded which only made him angrier. 

“I should have killed you when I had the chance! All of you pathetic, disgusting animals!” he hissed evilly, shrieking terribly when Suho blasted him away from me with his water, Sehun adding insult to injury by blowing him away, spinning him in the air before dropping him hard on the ground.

He huffed in exasperation. “I should’ve killed your families, the people you professed to love! Where would you have gained your strength from then?! You would’ve wallowed in the sweet darkness like I had and the world would be mine!” he spat his acidic flames towards us while the boys, including Mr. Tabi and Mr. Kang stood defensively before me, now that the black snake was the only one left that we had to deal with. 

“But we’re not,” Suho replied in a loud voice. “Just give up already! You have no power here!”

“And you’ll never get that power as long as we are here!” Kris added, still hovering over the ground though he had turned back to his human-form. 

“And you’ll never hurt Jae-noona ever again!” Sehun yelled, a gust of wind picking up again as it blasted against the Black Imoogi. 

“We will kill you first before that ever happens,” D.O. stated calmly, which made his threat creepier 

I thought that would mean something to Mr. Yok, but instead, the crazed man started laughing. Softly at first until his laughter echoed through whatever was left of the room. I was taking up most of the space now (one fat-joke and I’ll twig-slap you), but his creepy laugh still managed to fill the air. 

“You will kill me?” he asked, mockingly. 

“Over and over again, as long as it takes,” Luhan confirmed, oozing determination. 

The Black Imoogi recovered and stood still, looking at all of us before he blasted another laugh and became very quiet. “No, you won’t,” he suddenly stated. 

“Yes, we will, haven’t you been listening to what we’ve been saying all this time?” Chen piped up. 

“The only creature actually capable of killing an Imoogi is another Imoogi. And we both know that precious, little Jae won’t go that far. Not to mention that should you kill me, she’ll be trapped inside of that piece of wood forever.” Mr. Yok elaborated suddenly, his mouth twisted into an evil smile. “She’s probably trapped inside there already, unable to rejoin her precious pack. You see, Yongsun was right about that. Being the Tree of Life means that you live an eternal life filled with loneliness. Isolation. Living in a world inside of another world where no one can reach you…” 

I swallowed at his words, hesitating for a moment. 

“Noona isn’t alone,” Kai suddenly interjected. “She was never alone, and she is not Yongsun-nim,” he stated. “Most importantly, she is not you.” 

“It’s over,” Suho said, but the Black Imoogi wouldn’t accept defeat like this. Why would he? 

Boys, I called out, sending out to them what I had in mind. I connected with all of them, one by one. Xiumin started the attack, freezing whatever he could, his ice biting its way through the skin of the black snake. 

“You dare attack me?! You think you can actually kill me? Me?!” 

I think I actually saw something of fear in his eyes when Luhan struck next while Xiumin still attacked. His attack was one that you could not see, but it was one that could definitely be felt. Kris and Chanyeol went together, searing hot flames engulfing the Black Imoogi, who desperately tried to claw his way away from the attacks as he realized what was happening. 

“You can’t kill me! I am the Black Imoogi! I am the ruler of darkness and shadows, the counterbalance of your filthy light! You cannot dispose of me!” he bouldered, bones twisting and cracking when Lay joined his brothers, Baekhyun following soon after. He shrieked at the laser beams and the bolts of lightning that Chen had sent towards him. 

“I will not be stopped!” Mr. Yok still persisted, though it was evident that he had nowhere to run to at this point. “T-this world shall be mine!” All D.O. had to do was stomp his feet and rubble fell on top of the black snake, a typhoon ripping through the land, bits and pieces of the Black Imoogi chipping away, disintegrating into dust due to Tao’s time manipulation. Kai’s black smoke traveled towards the black snake, teleporting pieces of the creature away from its body.

“N-no! This can’t be- this can’t-! I was so close! NO!” he screamed as a bright light emerged from the boys’ energies fusing together and I could feel the genuine fear inside of the Black Imoogi’s heart. I doubt he remembered that he had one. 

“If you kill me, you kill yourself! You will never set foot on your beloved home amongst your loved ones ever again!” he yelled as I looked at him. 

But, who ever said anything about killing you? I replied as I sent out another pulse of energy towards him and he screamed when the light became so bright even I had to close my eyes. Suho send a wave of cleansing water to wash over the black snake and the world was silent. 

My world inside the tree, as a consequence, had become dark as well. 

Why did you do that? A familiar, deep voice spoke, though the voice sounded broken. I turned around to see a very faint light shimmering not too far ahead of me and I followed it. I startled at seeing Mr. Yok in his human form, looking like an old man as he is slumped down on the stub of a tree, looking at something in his hands. 

Why did you do that? he asked again, as I became well aware of the fact that he wore black and I white. When he turned around to look at me, I saw the face of a broken man and I stepped back. 

Why would you take the one thing I love? he inquired as I caught sight of what he was holding in his hand. It was a paper heart. One that was torn at the edges and dirty, but he treated it like it was the most valuable thing in the world. 

Because you loved it too much, I replied eventually, watching his reaction. The boys and I, we didn’t kill him. We simply diminished his strength by taking away his power, his sole reason for doing what he’s done. He wanted more of it. It would never have been enough, so we took it away. 

I don’t understand, he mused, looking into the void as if he was stuck in a nightmare. Why did the yeouiju respond favourably to you, but denied me? What would have happened if I were the one that plunged that dagger into my heart instead of you? Would I have achieved the power I desired? 

I gazed at Mr. Yok though I still kept my distance, even though I sensed no threat from him anymore. My eyes lingered on that small paper heart he cupped in his hands and I sighed. 

I don’t know the answers to all of these questions, I replied honestly. Perhaps the dagger would have rejected you because your intentions weren’t pure. Maybe it would have also accepted you, but I can’t imagine what kind of world that must be like.

I jumped a little, still cautious, when he turned his head towards me. 

Are you saying that I never had a chance to become a full-fledged dragon like my brother? I could never gained the power he had gained? The power that you now possess?

A silence fell as he waited for an answer, but I didn’t feel like I had one to give him. I don’t know, was my response as I carefully sat down beside him, still keeping a close watch as he looked out into the darkness. 

Then why am I here? He continued. Why are others granted the things I so desire while I am left with nothing? What have I done to deserve a life like this? 

I don’t know much, I started, seeing him stare at the filthy paper heart in his hands. But I know that the Tree of Life is supposed to bring order in chaos, balance in nature. You, for whatever reason you have, seem to only know how to destroy that balance. 

That is only because there’s too much of your disgusting light and goodness in the world! He yelled, voice reverberating through the suffocating darkness. I watched him before I realized that there was nothing to be afraid of anymore, and I hardened. 

Is that so? I retaliated. You think that light would disrupt the balance of nature when it’s the one protecting it? The momentary silence and his look of confusion was a sign for me to continue. You think that light tipped the scale because it is in a world of light that you live in? You’re older than me. You lived longer than I have, seen and experienced things I now can only dream of…I ignored the voices calling out for me for the time being. I wasn’t ready for that yet. 

Is it not the case? You dare argue with me, I, who have spent centuries living in the dark while all else was touched by light? Mr. Yok spoke, the paper heart trembling in his hands. 

You see only the light and darkness as they appear to you. But you forget about the light and darkness inside of everyone, in the lives of everyone. You didn’t stop and think to consider that did you? I nearly smirked when I saw him think it over. My parents, they’re good people. Filled with light, but it didn’t mean that they didn’t know what darkness was. Despite them being good people, their one wish on Exo planet was never granted - they couldn’t have children. Mr. Tabi, whom you’ve injected with your darkness, still went back to the light because he learned, because he remembered where he went wrong. All of my guardians, good, strong, and brave souls- but don’t think for one second that darkness never touched their lives. 

Mr. Yok looked at me in awe as if the words I spoke truly registered in his mind. 

Look at your brother, I then said, startling lightly at seeing the tears spring into the man’s eyes. He was the White Imoogi, the embodiment of light itself. He had to endure his own pain, his own suffering. He loved a woman he wanted to protect, causing her to hate him. They both lived centuries apart from one another while they could’ve spent all that time being together. And you-, he gazed at me, tears rolling silently from his face. The embodiment of darkness, a creature feared and loathed with reason…Still manages to shed tears for his fallen brother. The tears from his eyes rolled down into the paper heart he held in his hand and we both jolted when the heart lit up. The light was faint and small, but it was there. A tiny little beacon in all of this darkness. 

You and I, we need each other. When one attempts to outweigh the other, the world breaks. Do you think that you can understand that?

Mr. Yok stared at me a moment before his gaze shifted to the paper heart in his hand and he held it to his chest where it disappeared. I can learn, he finally replied. But what of you? Do you truly understand what it means to be the new Tree of Life? 

I blinked at his odd question, until I heard the faint voices of twelve boys calling out to me in the far distance. My heart tightened at hearing them and I closed my eyes. 

Noona, we won! 

Yah, Jae-noona, come look, the moon is bright again!

Jae, come out, come on! Come back…

I turned to look at Mr. Yok as he rose to his feet and nodded at him, a lump in my throat. I understand. I am the embodiment of light, protector of balance and the world, I summed up. 

And you are balanced enough to be this world’s guardian? 

I glanced at him, our eyes meeting. You’re asking me about the darkness in my life? I chuckled bitterly. I found out where I belong, only to have all of it taken away from me. I’m home, but I am not allowed to stay with the people that make it my home. My parents, my friends, my pack. I can never see them again… Is that enough darkness for you? 

Mr. Yok gave a solemn nod as he walked away, taking his darkness with him. The further he walked away from me, the brighter it became, the sun rising behind my back. 

Then I hope you are ready, Mr. Yok said before he left from my sight. 

Ready for what? To rule the world? I couldn’t help but sound sarcastic, expecting a sharp reply from him when he turned around. 

There was soberness in his eyes when he answered; to say goodbye.