This is a Chapter to credit the Reviewers that helped us review our Fanfic, you don't have to read it if you don't want to :) It's rather long~

By KyuAddict from 29 Hearts Review Shop ♥

Originality : 8/10 It sounds original but I think I've read a fanfic about these kind of things .
Entertainments : 9/10 It entertains me but it doesn't make me laugh a lot , I'm sorry.
Writing : 9/10 Your grammars are truly gorgeous but I don't understand why you should put double dots.
Title : 10/10 Interesting title ! I love it .
Length/Flow : 9/10 A bit rushing but other than that , the story is perfect the way it is :)
Total Score : 45/50

By SHINeeRoxx from :: EXOTIC GROUNDS :: Poster and Review Shop

Title: 3/5

The title was rather long, in my opinion. And if I were just a typical reader, I would skip the story and move on. Because seeing your title, you would be able to know that it is about a girl, Jae Mi, falling in love with 7 people. Plus, hardly any stories have the OC's name in the title.

Foreword/Description: 7/10

For the "Characters" portion, I think it would be better if you just mentioned the characters and their ages in the description/foreword. Your description also kept changing tenses, from past tense to present tense, vice versa. And for your foreword maybe you could include like little bits of the story.
Your description was rather interesting. It makes a reader want to read more.

Appearance: 4/5

The words at the bottom of the poster weren't very clear and visible. Otherwise, well done! The poster was amazing.

Plot: 10/15

The plot was rather good, seeing you add a little drama here and there, it added spice to the story. But at the same time, I find your story like a typical love story.

Originality: 6/15

It was normal, just a typical love story about many boys who fall in love with the perfect nice girl. The boys all fight for her, some confesses but she rejects, in the end she only chooses one. Rather normal in my opinion.

Grammar and Spelling: 12/20

Your tenses kept changing from present to past tense, vice versa. You may want to improve on it. And I see absolutely no need in having a space between the punctuation and word. Your story also included singlish (I'm Singaporean too), which means sometimes the sentence structures might have been a little weird.

Characterization: 7/10

Like what I said above, you should avoid cramming the characters all in the characters section. You could have written them in the description/foreword. I also got a little confused in the first chapter.

Flow: 10/10

The flow was good, not too fast and not too slow.

Overall Enjoyment: 8/10

I enjoyed the story, love BEAST :) It was humorous too. But it could have been more original. Otherwise, thank you for the story~

Total: 67/100

By MissIdash from F R O Z E N Y O G U R T Review and Graphics Shop

Title- 2/5
I don’t really like the title because it indicates seven boys fawning over the main character which I think is way too many for one story. When reading the title I am afraid that the story will have no real character/relationship developments simply because you have so many possible pairings.

Foreword/Description- 5/10
The description is very vague and some of the sentences you use to present the story don’t make any sense (example: “My parents died, but they didn't know ...” Who don’t know?). And it is a bit annoying to read that her parents are dead when they are alive up until chapter 42. Don’t write that they are dead unless they are dead from the beginning of the story.
After reading the story I find that the description fits the last 5 chapters but not the rest of the story.

Appearance- 9/10
Even though I find the description and foreword a bit messy it is a huge plus that you included a trailer. I really liked the trailer a lot and it made me want to read the story.
I also found it very helpful that you wrote the characters’ ages down, since I would have no idea how old they were since I am not familiar with them.

Characters- 4/10
Personally I think there was too many characters in the story. You didn’t manage to present them so that I could remember them the next time I read their names and I had to go back all the time to check who was who.
Also there was not enough in depth characterization for me. The characters seemed shallow and inconsistent and some seemed completely unnecessary.
Also I had a hard time with the “ert ajhussi” that kept coming back. He was just incredibly unbelievable as someone scarry. To me he seemed more like a drunk kid or something.

Plot- 4/10
The plot is seen before in different kinds of twists. I really feel that there is an unbalance in how the drama of the story is balanced between the chapters and I do feel that the story is slightly unfinished, seeing as the trailer led me believe that I would also get to see her deal with the leave and maybe even come back again.

Originality- 7/10
I haven’t read a story with the exact same storyline but the idea of more than one boy falling in love with a girl who is having a hard time, one way or another. However there were a few things that stood out from the “normal” story line of this kind of story.

Grammar/Punctuation/Spelling- 6/20
* Don’t use more than one punctuation unless it has deeper meaning, like showing hesitation when a character speaks (example: “I… I’m sorry,” said JaeMi). Also punctuation comes right after a word, not wit space in between. This is a really huge drawback.
* Try to be aware of the third person singular present tense. You seem to make mistakes with that a lot (example: “ HyunSeung oppa , Jae Jin oppa and I was running”. Should be “were running” since there is more than one person.)

Flow- 4/10
I think all the boys fell in love with JaeMi too quickly. I have a hard time distinguishing them from each other because you don’t really take your time to introduce each character and let the reader get to know him. Besides it is really annoying that you out space before all punctuations; it is difficult to read that way.
Besides the rushed falling in love, the general flow of the story is nice, apart from the fact that there is way to much drama in the last 5 chapters if you compare them to the rest of the story.

Overall Enjoyment- 4/10
After reading the story I am kind of disappointed from when I saw the trailer. It seems like all the drama that was hinted in the trailer happened in the last 5 chapters and up until that point it was kind of just chitchat. I was really looking forward to reading the story after the trailer but I think the trailer suggests that something happens, she leaves and then the rest of the story deal with what happens next. Instead the story ends when she leaves, which I found very disappointing.
The punctuation also bugged me to no end and it was hard to take a break from reading it and come back again later and get into the story again immediately because it took time to get used to your punctuation.

Comments- 4/5
Your readers like your story, though there are not a lot of comments compared to how long the story is.

Tips:
• Description! Every writer’s curse. The more you describe, the more your reader’s are able to “see” what is happening in the story. It is difficult and takes conscious practice but it is worth it.
• Conversations with many characters: It is a very difficult task to make a conversation between more than 2-3 characters on paper without making it seem abrupt or “jumpy”. A way to practise this could be to sit down and watch a movie clip where more than three people are talking (Friends is a very good example) and after that try to write the conversation you just saw as precisely as possible. After that, watch the clip again and read the conversation you wrote down and compare. What makes the conversation on screen fluent? Try to incorporate that in the conversation you wrote. The more you do this with different video clips, the more you become conscious of the different dynamics that are in groups of people and it will be easier for you to write a seemingly authentic conversation between many people.
• Beta reader; if you don’t have one, find one. A beta reader is gold and can help you with all the mistakes you might not catch when you read through your story yourself as well as help you with the plot if you are stuck somewhere.
• PUNCTUATION!! If you ever want to write more seriously than this you HAVE to use correct punctuation. NO space in front of a punctuation.

49/100