Do you remember me? With my schedule I haven’t had the time to write, and I miss writing very much, though not as much as I miss you. I apologize for my lacking these months. I’m really busy with job, and still, I just can say, I love what I’m doing now. 

Anyhow, I feel guilty. I post this story more than anything, to say: I'm sorry for being late.

So, this is a gave from me to you.. I got some vacations, so I'll update. Don't know which story yet, or how many chapters I can write in my free time, and I really feel guilty towards you. 

When I logged in today I found so many changes in AFF that I was really surprised and my heart beated really fast when I read your comments, walls, and PM.

You're wonderful people, and I love you even when I'm not here constantly. You're in my mind.

Thank you for being you.

Mn. I wanted to update, but first I’m practicing with a One shot, based in the anime SHINKYOKU SOUKAI POLYPHONICA. So, while I was taking a break, I found the anime I told you and zaz! I knew it was a must to write about this. A spirit which makes a pact with a singer and they develop feelings. I don’t know if it is the really the same as the anime, because I just watched the first episode and started to write.

Here we go!!Anyhow, I wanted to update, but first I’m practicing with a One shot, based in the anime SHINKYOKU SOUKAI POLYPHONICA. So, while I was taking a break, I found the anime I told you and zaz! I knew it was a must to write about this. A spirit which makes a pact with a singer and they develop feelings. I don’t know if it is the really the same as the anime, because I just watched the first episode and start to write.

Here we go!!

In the romance of people, some tell about fairies or spirits called muses, the origin of talent and inspiration. I have no such thing, don’t laugh at me, it hurts me. Why I don’t have it? How can I get one like my sister?

I was such a fool to think that at that time, yeah… when I was seven. I regret it now. Because if I would know that having one meant being hurting, I will prefer to never…

“Kyuhyun?”

See? Even my thoughts are about that spirit of mine more than my own music, urgh!

“What?”

I don’t know how can he be so dense, I really hate him, I really… aish, forget it. Who am I fooling? I love him!! that’s why it hurts and he is so dense… yeah, it’s a he, and I accepted that fact when I was fifteen, thank you. The problem isn’t that, the real problem is….

“Eunhyukkie~ I missed you!!!”

Yeah, the real problem is that the idiot drools for another person, which I will say, is pretty nice and wonderful, I mean, she is like wow! If I were not in love with this idiot, I will definitely fall for someone like her.

“I missed you… too, Sunny.”

Ah!!! He is blushing!!! How cute can he be. No, forget that, why? Why he sees her like that and not me? I’m such a loser in love.

Anyhow, let me really tell you what happened from the start, I’m not good at conveying my feelings, but I’ll go crazy if this continues, so yeah… Me, Cho Kyuhyun is writing a letter. To who? I don’t know yet, but since I can’t tell to anyone one, I’ll talk with this sheet of paper and you.

Everything started when I was seven… at that time…

“Kyuhyun~, Kyuhyun~”

I’ll talk to you later ok?

“What are you doing?” Kyuhyun erased his own sheet, the letters blurred and the paper almost ripped at the force. The told Spirit blinked and bent towards the young man who felt his cheeks warm and grunted to dissipated it.

“Nothing.”

The Spirit sighed and glanced at the girl steps ahead of him with a half-smile and shook his head. Straightening and walking to Sunny, the Spirit, or to be precise, the fairy in a man form smiled and blushed when she saw him deeply.

“I-It’s not what you think!!”

Sunny just shrugged grabbing the man by the arm, making Kyuhyun flinch and glared at her not so discretely and yet the Spirit, didn’t notice.

“Eunhyuk… I know, now, let’s go shopping.”

The named brightened at the proposal, glanced at Kyuhyun worriedly and sighed when he thought was being ignored.

“Ok, let’s go. Anything for a smile of a sun”

See? It’s impossible with these two. I bet she likes him, hn! I remember when she met him, she was with googled eyes and at any chance grabbing him. I still don’t know what happened afterwards she gave me a creepy smile and took away from me. I just remember that when he returned, he was less touchy with me, more distant and blushing around her everywhere, annoying in a word.

Kyuhyun started writing again, while Sunny laughed hard outside the building and glanced at Eunhyuk.

“You know, for a Fairy that fulfills dreams like tales say. You’re very clumsy. I mean, He is kind of cold and yet is obvious he is head over heels for you, why don’t you tell him that you like him as well?”

Eunhyuk blushed, covering with his hands in panic and glancing everywhere, she took his hand away and rolled her eyes.

“Ah~ anyway, I can’t believe you’re really taking my advice.”

Eunhyuk stopped confused “Why?”

“Because you really stopped to be touchy-freely with him, what I don’t get is why you blush every time you see me.”

Her eyes rounded and she blinked after a hiccup of surprise “Don’t tell me, you… towards me…?”

Eunhyuk blushed deeply “No!! It’s just is embarrassing that you know my feelings.”

“Just confess to him, it’s annoying that both of you like each other and yet no advance, so… really, after knowing me and be friends, you know I will keep the secret, I kept it safe after found you weren’t from the human world, right?”

Eunhyuk sighed heavy, his lips in a straight line “I’ll die…”

“Yeah, I know, embarrassment is something that people think is to die for, still…”

“That’s not it. I’ll really die. If he knows my feelings the pact will be annulled and I will be erased, my existence isn’t something that must be here in first place. People don’t believe in fairies anymore and magic and science isn’t to be together. They’ll punish me.”

“So you’ll let him meet someone ahead in the future and stand in line watching him?”

“Something like that.”

She sighed “That man.”

So, like I was saying. I’ll tell you everything from the beginning. Like I said, I wanted a fairy to myself. It was stupid per se since I got that thought after reading a tale and asked my sister; she tricked me telling me she had one, when in true. I found years later, that fake spirit was my sister’s boyfriend.

She cheated and I got trapped in somehow a complicated situation since then. I cried and was in despair even at my young age. I broke my music instruments and stop playing or singing and one day… in my dreams…

I heard him, a shy voice that told me to sing again. I never saw his face but I was being captivated for the mystery more than for the being and I negate his petition.

Every night and some days while the sun was bright I felt my eyelids heavy and dreamed over and over again the same thing. An empty place covered in white and a voice with the same request.

-Sing-.

I never did, until one day, I thought I was dreaming, because the sky broke in two and a light fell to the earth, and I saw him for the first time. Light turning in a person and smiling feeble while being hurt.

His clothes were filled with crimson even when they’re white and his smile was half broken.

“Sing, please… your voice isn’t something to be lost in this world.”

I wasn’t sure, but it was then when I carried him to my room from the balcony and started to sing again. I was happy. I didn’t know why that time, but I was happy.

The thing was that nobody could see him at that time. It got worse after I entered middle school. I was annoyed and I wasn’t sure with whom. He was always so bright, so perfect and I was, well, me. I had friends, and I got a girlfriend, and he smiled! So I didn’t know but I got mad at him and stopped singing again.

He was disappearing and I panicked. So I started to sing again and I noticed at my fifteen spring that I was in love with an invisible being.

I told him to disappear, to let me be free from him, even when I was the first one to want him, to bring him unconscious to this world and I got in a more rebellious stage of my life. Dating anyone without a reason and just singing enough to keep him but not enough for him to be well. It to be me, because I was a jerk.

So, when I was in high school I got tired of being an idiot and told him.

“If you want me to sing, you must do something for me.”

He watched me with his doe eyes, so pure at that time. So transparent and I was so dirty that it revolved my bowels.

“Transform in human and help to be a star.”

He blinked, pain broke in his eyes and I was sure I saw tears.

“You sure?”

I nodded and I saw disappointment before he disappeared in the air. I broke again in depression for being selfish. The next thing I knew when I was twenty and he was scouting me to be an idol.”

I accepted, of course I was unsure if it was him for real, until he smiled to me.

“I’m human now, so… I’ll help you become a star, but Kyuhyun, I want to tell you something. I…”

I didn’t remember his words that time, I was overjoyed and when time passed, he met her. Sunny, my enemy and contestant for his love, or so, I see it that way.

Sunny made and horror face “They? Whom are they and why?”

Eunhyuk smiled fondly to her before wanting to cry “I, when I was a in the magic land. Everything was so white and lack of color, and I heard a voice, it was Kyuhyun’s, he was screaming and crying for someone. I was too. So I went to earth but I was captured by my own kind. Since centuries ago, when fairies became just legends, it’s forbidden to get involved with humans and I broke the laws.

I know it wasn’t so bad. I could have gone back to my safe zone. Anyhow, I heard him; his heart was crying and yearning for music and love. I could provide him the first but not the last, and I loved his voice since the first time. So to get here, I hurt someone and I was hurt in return, being expelled from my own earth. I wasn’t thinking right. I just wanted to help the crying voice and heard him sing again in happiness but things weren’t as I wanted and he asked from me a taboo.

Be human, and so… I possessed a body. A human body, but first the human must be in coma or dead. I-I did something stupid and involved a person whom looked like me in an accident and I-I….”

“Enough don’t tell me more, or I’ll hate you. Sorry, I know you did it for good but still, to hurt people…”

“Yeah… I know.”

So, now that I’m twenty two I want to confess my feelings but I can’t. Eunhyuk loves her, if not, why he blushes so cutely and stutters sometimes?

I wrote a song, a love song and I really wanted to give it to him, but I tear the sheets apart yesterday because he told me.

“Spirits can’t be with humans, even if we love a human, is taboo. So, I’m glad that you don’t love me in that way, and… maybe I already love someone.”

Yeah, he rejected without knowing, sad, uh? So, this is my life; an unrequited love since young.

“Kyuhyun, can we talk?”

The young man turns hiding his letter and nods. Eunhyuk seems strange. And then…

“Yeah…?”

“I love you…”

“Uh?”

So, I want to erase my stupid thoughts till now. I was being a kid, love him? I was a brat in all senses. I never thought about his real feelings, just mine.

Even now, I regret everything. After that day, when I was confused after his confession, just tears flowed from my eyes at his retreating figure dissipating in the air, and this time… forever.

The words I never told him, the words I’ll never have the chance to say…

“I love you too.”