SEUNGRI’s POV

I was greeted by a smile the moment I arrived and went straight to her room. I could just see the effort she exerted to pull up a smile for me. I smiled back at her while silently screaming in my head. For her, even a smile takes so much of her energy that it angers me sometimes why she keeps on doing that.

“How did the rehearsal go?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.

“It was okay, Dara was being her usual teary self.”

She stared at me as I sat on the chair beside her bed. I took a deep breath and looked away, reaching out for her hand that was resting on her lap. I know she knew I was in a bad mood but she kept shut to which I’m grateful to. I didn’t really want to talk about CL to her right now.

I lifted her hand and planted a kiss on it. “I’d like to see you in a wedding gown someday.”

She chuckled. “Do you want me to parade in a gown?”

“You know what I mean,” I said, meeting her eyes. She looked at me as if reading me but then, she pulled her hand away from mine and reached out for my face. I leaned in closer to her. I didn’t want to tire her from this simple act.

“Seunghyun,” she whispered.

“Hmm. . .”

“Come here,” she said, moving to the side a little and patted the space beside her. I climbed on the bed beside her and pulled her in. “You feel so warm,” she said as she cuddled close to me

And you feel so cold, I thought but decided not to say it out loud. There’s no need to reiterate her condition right in her face.  I kissed her forehead and stared at the space right in front of me. “I love you.”

“I know,” Sohee answered. “I love you, too.”

I smiled and closed my eyes, savoring the feeling those words brought to me. Loving someone is supposed to be as easy as breathing but to be loved back, that has always been a challenge for me.

“Seungri?”

“Hmm?”

Silence followed. “I asked Chaerin to stay here for the meantime.”

I straightened up. “What? Why would you do that?”

“Why? What’s wrong with it? She’s our friend and it’s just temporary, while Dara and Jiyong are preparing for their wedding.”

“I don’t want her here!” I said a bit too loudly. She looked surprised with my outburst that I was suddenly filled with guilt. I shouldn’t have burst out like that. It would only stress her out as well. “I’m sorry,” I sighed. I can’t seem to calm myself down and I didn’t want her to see that so I excused myself and told her I need to get some water.

I drank the glass of water in one go the moment I managed to get one from the fridge in the kitchen. Damn it!

CL was the last person I want to see almost every day. Sohee’s fully aware about everything and I just can’t understand why she needed to do that. It’s either she was just kind or she was planning to have us reconciled. That would be futile. I don’t think I can ever be friends with CL again. Even being civil to her is hard.

I was brought out of my reverie when I heard the door bell rang. After gulping another glass of water, I went to get the door only to be greeted by the face of the last person I wanted to see. My jaw clenched upon seeing her luggage behind her.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Sohee asked me to come over,” she said in a casual tone that it only angered me more.

“You should have said no,” I gritted.

“I didn’t say yes because of you so stop showing me your fangs,” she snapped back. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I want to see Sohee.”

She forced herself in, bumping into my shoulder as she came in with her things. I grabbed her arm and turned her around, pushing her against the wall. I punched the wall beside her head and stared at her angrily. She stared up at me defiantly.

That all-so-familiar defiant look went right through me that I just found myself kissing her. It was wrong. It was all wrong. I was with someone else. CL already rejected my feelings. I feel nothing but anger everytime I see her but why am I kissing her right now? But why was she kissing me back? Wh