Chapter 17: What Happens in Jeju, Stays in Jeju

Have you ever had that feeling when you’re almost done with your project but then something clicks and poof! You’re back to square one.

That’s me now.

Just when I have finally made up my mind, here comes L.Joe, blurring all the straight lines in my head again. Just when I have finally given myself a chance with Woo Jiho again, here comes L.Joe getting in the way again.

Is this becoming a cycle?

L.Joe doesn’t want me. Then I have Jiho. Then L.Joe comes to me again.

I felt L.Joe hand run to the back of my neck, pulling my face closer to him, deepening the kiss.

I flickered when I saw his eyes closed. I wanted to breakaway but my mind is not functioning well. I wanted to push him away but my energy is drained by his kiss.

Is this another of L.Joe’s wonders?

He makes me weak. He drains all my energy.

It’s like he has casted a spell on me and I have no way out. I have to respond.

I didn’t even know why shut my eyes and responded to him. This is one of the wonders he has on me. I become submissive.

His other hand moved to my waist and pulled my body closer to him. How could he do this?

How does he have such impact on me?

Why is it that even though he’s the reason for my pain, I feel like he is also the treatment for that pain? He’s the poison and the antidote at the same time.

It’s crazy. I know it sounds very impossible. But that’s how I feel it is.

L.Joe broke off from the kiss and leaned his forehead on mine.

We are both out of breath but he’s holding onto me, really tight.

“5 years.” He breathed. “I ing waited 5 years to kiss you.” He caressed my cheeks. “I almost died waiting. And right now, I feel alive again.” He planted another kiss on my lips then shut his eyes tightly. “ this! I want to kiss you all day, Kim Hana.” He muttered and exhaled deeply.

I felt my heart beating fast. Not Jiho-kind-of fast. But L.Joe-kind-of fast.

I have two rhythms of my tachycardia (A/N: fast heartbeat; more than 100 bpm). The Jiho type which makes me feel like my heart is leaping out of my chest. And the L.Joe type which makes my heart stop for a moment then beats really really really fast then stops again.

“Please, let’s stop hurting each other. Please, let’s be happy together.” He pleaded. “I’ve let you go in the past and I’m not letting it happen again.”

I looked at him and sighed. “You can’t. You are tied. You have Namjoo.” I told him shaking my head at him, trying to get out from his grip.

But he held me tight. “I’m going to break up with her.” He told me. This time, he’s not asking me. He’s not getting my permission. He’s informing me that he would.

I narrowed my eyes at him. “You can’t.” I shook my head. “You can’t break up with her because of me.” I told him.

He looked into my eyes. “Do we have to do this again?” He asked me. “Do we have to go through this conscience and guilt trip again because someone doesn’t deserve to hurt?” He exasperated. “We’ve gone through this thing 5 years ago and look at where it got us now. We are still hurting, Hana. The people we tried to protect already moved on. We are the only ones left.”

He held my cheeks and made me look at him. “Do you want to make the same mistake again?” he asked me. “Because I don’t.” He breathed. “This time, I’m going to fight for you. This time, I’m going to fight for us. Even if you’ve already given up.”

Upon hearing his words, my tears fell down again.

Why do I feel like he’s right? Why do I feel like he has the point?

Why do I feel like I’m almost convinced of getting back with him?

“You said destiny forbids our forever.” He told me. “But would destiny bring you back if we’re really not for each other?” He asked me.

I shut my eyes. “This is not right.” I spoke. “Every time this happens, it doesn’t come with the right timing. Right love at the wrong time.”

He froze and looked at me.

“We can’t be together, Byunghun.” I told him. “I understand what you mean but we just can’t.”

L.Joe looked at me in disbelief and messed his hair in frustration. “Damn it, Hana! When will you even listen to me? You defied me 5 years ago and you’re doing it again! I don’t know what to do with you!” He yelled at me.

I looked down and stepped away from him.

“Can’t you stop being selfless and think about yourself first for the first time?” he asked me. “Do you even want to be happy?” He exclaimed.

I took a deep breath then shut my eyes. I’m getting tired of this. I need to breakaway. I need a break from this L.Joe Drama.

He stared at me. “I have decided.” He began. “I’m really going to break up with her.”

“Byung-“

“This is not because of you, Hana! This is because of me.” He cut me. “I wanted to do something right for myself for once in 5 years. I want to stand with what I believe in. I want to prove to myself that I could do something for you too.”

I noticed tears in his eyes.

Suddenly, I felt an urge to wipe those tears away.

“I didn’t break up with Minji before because that’s what you told me. You don’t want her to get hurt.” He continued. “But then, when we try to look at it, she would be hurt with lies more than hearing the truth. She felt betrayed because we lied to her.”

He chuckled weakly. “But today, I’m manning up.” He spoke. “I’m going to fight for something I want.” Then he dashed out of the door.

I was trembling really hard and fell onto the floor when I heard the door shut, tears falling down my cheeks, down to the floor.

Why do I always cry when it comes to L.Joe?

Why does it always happen like this?

I’m strong. I know. I even convinced myself to stop everything I have for him. But the hell to everything when he’s in front of me.

It’s like I’ve built a huge wall for L.Joe but he dug in underground to come at me. The wall was useless.

Or maybe because it has a weak foundation?

--

Still, even after the confrontation, L.Joe and I visited the estate owner.

And it’s the most awkward thing on earth. The car and plane ride coming here wouldn’t even compare.

No one was talking.

He keeps looking at me. And it seems like he wants to tell me something but then nothing came. There was silence.

“Oh, hello, Mr. Lee Byunghun!” An old man greeted us with wide smile. He must be the owner.

L.Joe shook hands with the man. “Good day, Mr. Lim.” He greeted back.

Mr. Lim looked at me and smiled. “You must be Kim Hana.” He told me.

I smiled and nodded. “Yes, I am.” I replied then I shook his hand as well.

“You’re really pretty, indeed.” He told me then glanced at L.Joe.

L.Joe smiled back.

I raised my brow at the two. Am I missing something here?

Mr. Lim chuckled then he placed his hands in his pockets. “Come on. I’ll show you the land.” He told us and led us to the estate.

L.Joe and I followed courteously until we arrived at the said estate.

It was huge. According to Mr. Lim, this is a 70-hectare piece of land that their ancestors owned. However, he is moving to the US with his family for good so, he’s selling the land.

It is strategically situated near the shore and the highway, so, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to put up a resort in it.

Taking to consideration that L.Joe also wanted to put up a small themed park for kids.

“Do you like it?” L.Joe talked to me for the first time.

I looked around and nodded. “It’s a good spot for resorts.” I replied in all honesty.

He chuckled. “I wouldn’t pick this spot if it isn’t a good spot.” He told me before walking to Mr. Lim and talked about the contract signing and payment details.

It’s L.Joe’s job – this contract, this project. After all, it’s his project.

I saw them shake hands before L.Joe walked to me.

“Let’s go.” He told me.

I narrowed my eyes on him. “Is it sealed?” I asked him.

I mean, I’m curious. They didn’t even talk for more than 10 minutes and now we’re going. It’s like we’ve wasted our time in walking to here. And it seemed like I was never really needed to come here.

L.Joe looked at me and nodded. “Of course. When L.Joe works, it’s always sealed.” He told me.

I scoffed at him and walked ahead.

Jerk.

L.Joe followed me to his car. I went in straight. Geez. I want to go home. Another minute with him would make me go insane.

I crossed my arm across my chest and looked out the window.

“Why did you even want me to come with you here? It seems like you’ve got everything laid already.” I told him, looking out.

I heard him take a deep breath. “I wanted you to see the area.” He replied.

I looked at him with a raised brow. “Hell, you should’ve given me a picture of the place.” I snapped.

He looked at me and sighed harder. “Can we not fight over this?” He asked me. His voice sounded tired. “You’re here. We can’t do anything about it anymore.”

I scoffed at him. “Maybe you just wanted me to come with you for your personal reasons.” I shot at him. “I’m not really needed in this, Byunghun, right?”

He shut his eyes and hit the steering wheel. “Damn it, Kim Hana! Do you really have to point my desperation to be with you out?!” He exasperated. “I wanted you to come here with me because I want to spend more time with you. I want to get close to you again because I missed you like hell!”

My jaw dropped when I heard his words.

Why did I even ask this?

We had a confrontation earlier, why didn’t I even learn to just shut my mouth up?

“Why do I have to confess to you multiple times in one day?” He asked me before revving the engine. “I’ve already laid my feelings out but I never got a response from you.” He mumbled.

I sighed hard and looked away.

Now, how do I act like nothing happened?

He kissed me. He told me he would fight for me. He told me he would prove himself to me.

I bit my lip and thought of a solution to this.

If I gave up now, I would throw everything I’ve started.

My phone vibrated. It’s Woo Jiho.

I took a deep breath. What happens in Jeju, stays in Jeju.

---

You all think L.Joe's indecisive? Think like him. Try putting yourselves in the characters. What would you have felt? Comment!!!! Hehehe!

I may not be able to update tomorrow night. I'm starting my trainings. You know work. But I'm not sure yet. Thanks for reading!

XOXO,

RChampagne <3